CHAPTER 2

THE WEIGHT OF SHAME.

I woke up to a ray of sunlight that shone through my room. Truth be told, I can't say that I had a great night's rest, but I can say for sure that I had a series of nightmares.

As I made to rise from my bed, a flashback of yesterday's rejection hit me like a thunderstorm.

I tried very hard to close my eyes shut so that I'd be able to forget all the memories of the past, but I just couldn't erase them.

To even think that I had summoned the courage to meet him afterward and tell him how I felt, but he still made me feel like a mistake.

 "Rory, we can't be together. I'm not ready for this," he said, without any form of emotion. To even think that he felt like he could treat me anyway, was so bad. My heart sank in fear, as the thoughts of shame flooded me.

As I still lay down, I kept battling with my inner self, as I was trying very hard to wave off the pain that I felt. 

"Forget about it, Rory!" I tried to cheer myself up, but it seemed impossible.

Why did I even let him reject me in the first place? What was I going to do?

In tiredness, I pushed myself up from the bed and walked into the bathroom to take my bath.

Looking in the mirror, I could see the heavy black spots under my eyes, which were a result of crying.

At this point, I felt dejected. I felt like the whole world was going to mock me. 

I could hear the soft murmurs of my family downstairs. They spoke in low tones, and I didn't blame them for that.

Today would be the day I had to face the Pack. I was going to keep up with facing both my family, friends, and other wolves, who were inquisitive about my rejection.

Ohh!

With a heavy heart filled with uncertainties, I walked down the stairs.

The atmosphere was filled with tension, as everyone had their eyes on me. My parents were seated at the kitchen table, with serious gazes, as they made sure to avoid my gaze.

 My younger brother, Eli, sat on the chair with visible frustration, as he continued to hum inaudible songs to himself.

It was as if the air itself was trying to suffocate us, as I stood there in shame.

"Rory!" My father called out to me, as he finally broke the silence. "It's time for us to talk about what happened yesterday."

I felt a cold shiver run down my spine. "Is that even necessary? Is there any need to?" I said with a whisper, as I looked at my brother Eli, who looked very tensed and ashamed.

"Yes, there's every need to." My mother responded with a firm, yet strong voice. "It's very important, especially with the way the pack operates."

Immediately, my heart paused for a slight second.

In our Pack, rejection was treated like an abomination. Its effect wasn't just on the individual, but it did go as far as destroying the reputation of the person's family.

Without being told, I knew what I was going to face, and the thoughts of that alone, made me want to run away.

"What is going to happen to me? What will become of me?" I asked with fear in my voice.

"We'll decide your fate together." My father responded with uncertainty in his voice. The truth was, the chances of a rejected mate like me were few, and none of them were good.

"There's only one option. You'd have to undergo the ritual of deliverance," my mother said with a pitiful look, and that made me feel even more ashamed of myself. "The ritual is to show that you're still worthy of being in this pack."

The Ritual of Deliverance. To be honest, just the thought of this ritual made me feel ashamed.

It was a public display, where the rejected mates would have to prove their worth, after a series of challenges.

 In the past, I have seen others go through it, and it was never close to fun. I'd have to deal with the shame and mockery from my peer group.

"I can’t do that," I said while struggling to swallow a heavy lump of saliva down my throat. "I’d rather leave this place."

"Rory, you're strong. You just can't run away at this time!" Eli burst out in frustration, as he tried very hard to hold back his tears. "You need to conquer this challenge. Remember, we're here for you, and we’re family!"

Anyway, he was right. However, the look of frustration and shame in their eyes said it all.

Suddenly, I felt like I was drowning in the pool of my thoughts. I couldn't breathe, and I couldn't move my body. "I'm sorry." I sighed in frustration.

There was a long quietness afterward until my father broke the silence.

"In as much as we love you, Rory, you must also face the consequences of your experience. You must decide how you're going to handle this."

Before I could say a word, a loud knock interrupted our thoughts and discussions.

I looked at my parents, and from their silent gazes, I knew that something was amiss.

“Who could that be?” My mother asked in anger, as her brow furrowed in anger.

“I’ll check.” I offered to check, but I noticed at that moment that my body was pinned to the spot where I sat, and my legs were heavy as if they were tied by the shame of what I had done.

Finally, I was able to muster the courage to stand up and move to the door. But as I did that, I noticed that a bad spirit was monitoring me.

I opened the door, and I was shocked to see the figure that was standing outside the porch. It was Kaiden.

My heart skipped for a second, as I looked at him in both surprise and uncertainty.

He stood there with a firm expression that couldn't be read by anyone. “Rory!" he called out to me, with his voice almost as low as a whisper.

“What are you doing here? Who sent you?” I asked, with a raised tone.

“I heard about everything that happened,” he replied with a genuine look. “Can I come in?”

I hesitated for a while. I could feel the tension in the air, and I knew that something was about to happen. It was everywhere in the air. “This isn't a good time.”

Immediately, Kaiden’s gaze went to the ground, like he was searching for something. At that moment, I felt a surge of regret building up in me. 

There was something different about him that I wanted to know. He looked at me like he had something to say, but he chose to stay calm.

“Rory, I perfectly understand your worries, and it's okay to feel that way,” he said softly, and it melted my heart. However, I still felt like there was more to what he was saying.

“Okay? So, what's the matter?” I asked with bitterness in my voice. “So? You think I'm rejected, right?"

He sighed with a tired gaze. "No, that's not what I meant. I don’t see you that way. I just...”

“Rory!” my mother called from inside, as her voice abruptly ended the conversation. “Please, come back inside, right now.”

“I have to go back inside,” I said to him, with a broken spirit. 

Now, I had to battle with all the burden and unnecessary pressure that my family had subconsciously placed on me.

“Wait!” Kaiden said, with a reassuring voice. I turned back to see him waving at me. “Anytime you feel bored and want to talk to someone, I'm always available. I promise never to judge you."

Before I could open my mouth to respond, my mother's impatient voice called out to me, again. “Rory, come here, now!”

“Urm... I'll think about it,” I replied with a forced smile, as I walked back into the house. Before he could even respond, I gently closed the door and walked back inside my house.

Even as the meeting continued, my heart continued to deliberate about Kaiden's proposition.

Immediately I sat down, I noticed that one feeling kept bothering my mind. It was the feeling that something bad was cooking.

I felt like a secret was being hidden from me.

As the conversation continued, a sudden chill ran through my spine. I felt tired.

I heard a scary sound. A sound that reminded me of the childhood pains that I had to endure.

My heart skipped, as I ran to check who was at our window.

What was out there?

What did they want?

My heart flew away, as I caught a glimpse of the evil shadow that had just crossed my path.

“Did you see that?” I asked with fear.

My family looked at me with so much confusion. Unfortunately, I could feel a bad aura around us. I knew that something was lurking around.

Suddenly, the front door opened. This time around, it wasn't Kaiden, but it was something more sinister.

It was at this point I knew that this battle was going to be a very long one.