While I am working, I have a lot of things in my mind. I can't focus and I always feel like I am floating. I can't understand this anymore. I put my palm to cover my face out of frustration. I don't think I can handle this any longer. After my work today I will print some pictures of Dad so that I can use it to find him in case people around that place have seen him. Maybe I should think for that first. I will focus on it first. I need to be strong. I do not have anyone for myself. In this world, you will be alone and no one is there for you to help yourself but only you. I need to take note of that. People will say that they will help you out. People say that they will be there for you but in t6imes of trouble, they are not there and all you have to do is cry and realized that we have nothing to lean on in our darkest days. No one will ever understand. I heaved a sigh and finally finish my work. I became energetic in the next hours of the day. Mr. Woods did not even call me even
I was crying the whole lunch time. It is just I can't stop it any more and I feel like I'm alone, I mean yes, I'm really alone in this fight and there's nothing else to rely on except myself. I am inside the bathroom and I did nothing but to cry and cry the whole lunch time, I am alone eating from my table. This is the first time again that me and Rozieden did not eat together at the lunch time. I feel like everyone betrayed me and even if I am not the type who do self pity but still I can't stop myself from feeling this way. Now, I am doubting it again. I am doubting telling Rozieden again. I am scared that he is not really into me that it will never be enough for him to understand me, to understand my situation and at the end he will be a someone who is nothing but a few chapters in my life but will never be the epilogue and the ending. I am so anxious about everything but still I finished my work even keep thinking about what is happening right now about Dad. What is he eating?
''Kellah.'' Mr. Woods uttered in a calm voice while staring at me. I still can't understand his presenc right now in front of me but I will never change my mind this time. I let a heavu sigh and saw how tired his eyes is. I closed my eyes tightly as I swallowed hard before facing him again. ''What is it that you need to me, Mr. Woods? Do I still have unfinished works? Do you want something so that I can give it to you right away. Just make sure that I have the capabilities to do it, Sir.'' I said so that he will understand that I want this to be done already and we need to know our boundaries now. ''Is that all you want to say, huh? You are acting like it was just nothing? Between us.. it was just nothing, huh?'' He asked but my eyes are getting colder every minutes have pass between the both of us. ''Should I ask the same question to you, huh? For acting strange too. Are you mad that I didn't reply to your messages? Is that your only reason, huh? Too shallow, Rozieden, too shallo
To love is to show it's real meaning. To love is to make people feel it that it's real. To love is to act too. You should not just keep telling that you love that person and make them feel them that it seems like you don't. If you say you love a person then you are obliged to make them feel that you are in order to keep them, if you want to keep or to make them stay then you should show them what they deserve because if those people loves you too, they will surely do the same way. That is how love works. I've been finding for a reason to love again. I've been trying to. I always look up to the sky, finding for signs. I always listens and observe myself in case I feel happy again for the people who randomly comes in my life. But I just can't find it for myself. It feels like I am seeking for something. I am seeking for something that I can't describe. It is hard to notice what is wrong to you self and that is what I am feeling right now. I feel like I lack of something. I feel like th
Life works so unfair and you should not wonder about that anymore. It is always like that and I don’t know why. Some says that it is a challenge. Some says that it is just a test, fuck that test, then. They said that it will prove how faithful you are to God. I hate that reason so much that I almost lose my hope and trust to him. I can say that I became lost. I feel like there is no one for me and yet they say it is just a challenge but no. At the end of the day he is the one you will find and ask for help. You will question him, ask him and demand things such as answers. It made me strong, those times made me strong somehow. I am not a happy person anymore but it made me strong. I moved on, I mean I am trying until now. ‘’Miss K, your lunch is already there in the conference room. I am very sorry for the inconvenience. But for sure the students learned a lot from you.’’ A professor stated and I just smiled to him. ‘’It’s okay, Mister Kim. It doesn’t affect my schedule. It is my d
In the next days, I decided to assign someone to watch for the restaurant. I decided to move in the City to settle the paper that is need to settle. I am building a branch there, finally. At first, I am hesitating to build it in the City and I asked myself why. I ask myself for a reason and I just can’t find a valid one especially if Masha keeps pushing me to do it. ‘’You know what, just push it. Do it already and do not hesitate. It is not about the past, in fact it can be your way to heal yourself, girl. It’s for the business too.’’ She keeps motivating me and it always works to me. Masha is such a good friend to me. I met her one year ago and I really enjoy her company and kindness. ‘’Yeah, don’t worry. I already made up my mind so nothing can change it anymore. I forgot to read the email, I need to hang this call already, Masha.’’ I uttered and she just groaned from the other line and for sure she is already rolling her eyes if we are together now. She is busy for her son’s mov
It took me three hours before I finally opened the email. I immediately read it while eating a sandwich for lunch. I parked my car near a gasoline station after I full tanked it. I am wearing a crop top sleeveless inside my gray blazer and a black pants partnered with a stilettos. I am leaning in the car like I don’t care about all the people passing the street. I remember what Toni said, my worker from the main branch. She said we need to settle a partnership from a bank? A bank? Seriously? Bank is too big to have a partnership with. It somehow reminds me of someone who is too grumpy and annoying but always managed how to communicate with investors and partnerships. I heaved a sigh after I finished reading the email. TO; Owner of the Pan de Restaurant branches. We are very open for partnership to fully and finally receive the permit in the City of -. We are asking for the presence of the owner for clarification and words from him/ her too. Thank you and we are expecting for yo
Why the hell I didn’t notice that? Why didn’t I check where it came from? I am so dumb! I am so dumb!I screamed while running back and forth in my room. I am trying to cover my face and keep reading it again just to make sure that I am just mistaken but I am not! I am not! It’s real. It is really that bank.A partnership with that bank? A partnership with him?I am too stunned and just staring somewhere the whole night. I can’t still process it. It doesn’t want to sink in and I keep shaking my head.‘’No, this isn’t true. This isn’t true.’’ I muttered while biting the tip of my nails to stop myself from panicking too much.I can still remember the exact details before.How I watch his sorrowful eyes while I am leaving. My heart aches because of that memory. I am a terrible person for hurting someone like him. I am so selfish that time but I don’t regret it. It is painful, indeed but I’ve grown because of my choices in life. I learned too and those times with him will always have a sp