Reeca was sitting closest to me, and hadn’t spoken at all through my entire little rant about what was going on and what I was feeling and how scared I was that I was going to mess us up. Plus, I was rapidly gaining weight from the baby and even though I knew that was normal, it was happening so fast, my body was a strange mix of good, lush feeling, and discomfort and weird things.
Yet, Cazz was so sweet with me. Every night he fell asleep holding me, cradling my stomach. Every night and every morning he leaned down to talk to my belly and good-naturedly shushed me if I tried to talk too, because he said it was important time for his son to get to know his voice.
He kept me glu
~ JESSE ~We sat at the head of the massive, royal dining table that was brimming with wolves—most of whom I’d never met, or had only seen at the Selection. Everyone dressed in fine clothing, though not quite as flashy as the Selection, still… they all looked wonderful.And I felt fat and small and tired and… ugh.Rake was here in his long tunic and loose trousers again with that medallion on his chest. And Rory in some kind of suit that looked almost like a military jacket without the medals and trim—his mate sat at his side, beaming, in a beautiful dress that was simple, but stunning. Ghere sat at my other side with his notes on his thigh, reaching under the table to scribble different things while the others talked and talked and talked.
~ CASIMIR ~I stood there, gaping, as my mate, my wife, the mother of my child, cursed under her breath, then stormed away.I snapped my fingers at Sven, and two other guards and sent them after her, but I still didn’t go back into the dining room. I waited, watching, as they surrounded her while she stomped down the hall.And my chest got tighter and tighter with every step she took without looking back at me.I just need some space, Cazz—you remember what that feels like, right?I did. I remembered exactly how that felt. And it terrified me. Because I needed space like that when I’d cared about her but didn&r
~ JESSE ~“Even this right now,” I said sullenly. “Once again, it’s the old pattern, right? He doesn’t know what to do so he sends you—”“No, Jesse. I thought that too, at first. I even said something to him. But he said you couldn’t hear him right now. He sent me because he wants to know how he can make this better, but he thinks you can’t tell him. So he wanted me to ask. And I have to say, after everything that’s happened… I mean he could have chosen anyone else. He sent me because he thought that would help you.”I sighed again. “See? He’s being sweet and good and I can see that. So then I feel
~ CASIMIR ~I could barely focus on the conversation with the Alphas while they were gone. Kept having to ask males to repeat themselves. But I could feel her—feel the tension in her, the frustration, the love, the turmoil… I prayed she’d tell Rake something. Anything.I was so consumed with her I couldn’t even find it in me to be embarrassed that they’d all heard us argue. There were some benefits to being King—one scathing look at them all when I walked back into the dining room had quelled any curious looks. And a quick turn of the conversation back to the problems at hand distracted them.But it didn’t stop my heart tugging me back to her.When Rake slipped back into the dining
~ JESSE ~‘Jesse, did you eat?’Cazz’s voice in my head brought a jolt of adrenaline, a wash of relief, and a fist of fear as well.‘I’m not hungry.’ I knew I sounded petulant, so I took a deep breath. ‘But thank you for checking on me.’‘I want to help you, Jesse. I love you.’ It was strange to hear him so certain and so shaky at the same time. The ring of simple truth clanging up against the vibration of unease.‘I know, Cazz. I love you too.’
~ CASIMIR ~It was only the first step to reassure her, but her breath caught, and I almost stumbled and for a moment everything in me screamed to flee from her. Because I’d opened my mind to her in a way I’d never given to anyone. Ever.I had learned very young in life how to guard my thoughts.My father had used his power in my early years, tearing through walls with the sledgehammer of his power, revealing me against my will. But it had done exactly what he’d intended for it to do—taught me to build steel walls around my mind.By the time I was sixteen he struggled to break through my barriers.By eighteen he c
~ JESSE ~Cazz drove us out to that same meadow, then ran around the cab of the truck to lift me out of the cab and carry me to the back and sit me on the truck bed.The whole truck bobbed as I scooted myself up the mattress to sit with my back to the truck cab, and he hopped into the bed of the truck and pulled out that bag he’d been carrying, along with a picnic basket.“Are you hungry? You need to eat, Jesse. For the baby, even if you don’t feel like it.”I knew he was right, so I took a piece of the jerky he offered, a handful of nuts, and some cherries.Cazz took off his boots and came to sit next to me, his back to the cab as well, a
~ CASIMIR ~Even the offer was risky. I knew it could sound like I was just pressuring her into sex. I had prayed that she’d see my heart in it and understand what I was doing. What I was offering—what I was really giving her.She stared at me, wide-eyed, her lower jaw slack.I swallowed and plowed on.“Jesse, this isn’t about sex—”“No, Cazz, I get it,” she breathed.I went still as she looked down at that bag again, let go of my hand and opened the neck of the bag to further reveal the tools inside.