I could barely focus on the conversation with the Alphas while they were gone. Kept having to ask males to repeat themselves. But I could feel her—feel the tension in her, the frustration, the love, the turmoil… I prayed she’d tell Rake something. Anything.
I was so consumed with her I couldn’t even find it in me to be embarrassed that they’d all heard us argue. There were some benefits to being King—one scathing look at them all when I walked back into the dining room had quelled any curious looks. And a quick turn of the conversation back to the problems at hand distracted them.
But it didn’t stop my heart tugging me back to her.
When Rake slipped back into the dining
~ JESSE ~‘Jesse, did you eat?’Cazz’s voice in my head brought a jolt of adrenaline, a wash of relief, and a fist of fear as well.‘I’m not hungry.’ I knew I sounded petulant, so I took a deep breath. ‘But thank you for checking on me.’‘I want to help you, Jesse. I love you.’ It was strange to hear him so certain and so shaky at the same time. The ring of simple truth clanging up against the vibration of unease.‘I know, Cazz. I love you too.’
~ CASIMIR ~It was only the first step to reassure her, but her breath caught, and I almost stumbled and for a moment everything in me screamed to flee from her. Because I’d opened my mind to her in a way I’d never given to anyone. Ever.I had learned very young in life how to guard my thoughts.My father had used his power in my early years, tearing through walls with the sledgehammer of his power, revealing me against my will. But it had done exactly what he’d intended for it to do—taught me to build steel walls around my mind.By the time I was sixteen he struggled to break through my barriers.By eighteen he c
~ JESSE ~Cazz drove us out to that same meadow, then ran around the cab of the truck to lift me out of the cab and carry me to the back and sit me on the truck bed.The whole truck bobbed as I scooted myself up the mattress to sit with my back to the truck cab, and he hopped into the bed of the truck and pulled out that bag he’d been carrying, along with a picnic basket.“Are you hungry? You need to eat, Jesse. For the baby, even if you don’t feel like it.”I knew he was right, so I took a piece of the jerky he offered, a handful of nuts, and some cherries.Cazz took off his boots and came to sit next to me, his back to the cab as well, a
~ CASIMIR ~Even the offer was risky. I knew it could sound like I was just pressuring her into sex. I had prayed that she’d see my heart in it and understand what I was doing. What I was offering—what I was really giving her.She stared at me, wide-eyed, her lower jaw slack.I swallowed and plowed on.“Jesse, this isn’t about sex—”“No, Cazz, I get it,” she breathed.I went still as she looked down at that bag again, let go of my hand and opened the neck of the bag to further reveal the tools inside.
~ JESSE ~Head back so those tendons on his neck stood proud, shoulders and arms tight and flexed, but outstretched like he’d opened his arms to God, Cazz’s back arched, and his entire body quivered… he was stunning and surrendered, and I wanted him.I opened my mouth over that tendon on his neck, flicked my tongue on his throat, dipped it into the hollow between his collarbones, kissed my way down his chest, opening the buttons on his shirt and tugging it out of his pants first, then pushing the sides apart when I had all the buttons free so his beautiful chest and abs were bare.He pulled his head up like he was going to look down on me when I began to kiss my way down his chest to his stomach, tickled his navel with my tongue, traced the lines between his muscles with shaking fingertips, everything.
~ CASIMIR ~The desperation in me to pull her closer, to touch every inch of her skin, to taste her mouth, her skin, her neck, her shoulder… there weren’t enough moments, there wasn’t enough breath, there could never be enough.I took her face in my hands and pulled her head back, opening my mouth on her throat and whispering her name against her skin as she arched and sobbed my name.For a time, I couldn’t see with my eyes, only with my mind—the very first times I’d touched her, my heart so closed and guarded, yet my body needing. And now as I ached for her and my mind flashed on all those touches, all that instruction, all the ways I’d tried to
~ JESSE ~The water rippled gently as I lifted one hand out of the bath that surrounded us like a warm, steaming hug, and tried to push a strand of hair off my face without it getting stuck to my wet fingers.We should be in bed. We should be asleep. But neither of us wanted to break the spell.Cazz sat with his back to the end of the bath and had pulled me up between his legs so I lay back against his chest. He had one hand cupping my breast, the other cradling my belly and he hadn’t spoken in probably fifteen minutes. Being surrounded by him like this was feeding something in me—something in the bond. There were still flickers here and there, little niggles of nerves or fear, but every time they popped their heads up, I shooed them away.My mate loved me. He
~ JESSE ~For a moment I almost stopped him—only because we were both so tired. But then he dropped his hand between my legs and began to tease me and my breath quickened immediately.I let my knees fall further apart, resting my legs against his and keeping my eyes closed as he grew harder against my back.For long minutes, he did nothing but stroke fingers up and down the insides of my thighs, across my breasts, down my sides, his breath growing slowly harsher and faster as my skin pebbled and I began to press into his touch.Still, neither of us moved.The longer he played and stroked, the more sensitive I became, until he was barely tracing the very tips of his fingers over me and it felt like comets of sensation
~ CASIMIR ~I was pretty sure if I didn’t get inside her, I was going to eat her alive.Scooting with her in my lap, still straddling me, I got her so both my knees and her back were flat against the wall. Then I flipped open the wide, leather cuffs that had been secured directly to the wall and first lifted one of her hands, to strap it in so her hand was levered above her shoulder, but with her arm comfortably bent so she could relax. Then I did the same with her other hand on the other side.So I straddled the banana-seat, while she straddled me and her hands were secured to the wall behind her.Her breasts rose and fell with her heavy breathing, and her eyes were bright with desire.Overwhelmed again with how much thought she’d put into this, for a moment I just took her face in my hands and kissed her. But that drew us together—my cock pressing against her, and I couldn’t resist rolling my hips, teasing
~ CASIMIR ~“I made a new Den,” Jesse whispered, her hands over her mouth, staring up at me—those beautiful eyes wide, but also a little fearful. “I know it’s not the same, but I got Ghere to help me because he remembered what things you’d had before and… I hope you like it.”Like it? Was she serious?My heart was slamming against my ribs, and I was having trouble breathing.The room seemed smaller than I remembered because the walls were painted a dull black. But the tighter space than what I’d had down next to the Den just made it feel more intimate.There were two lamps, one on each end, and a chandelier high above. Candles everywhere, though she hadn’t lit mo
~ JESSE ~It was Cazz’s turn to plan the monthly date. But I was humming about this one. Things were finally ready, and impossibly, Ghere had helped me successfully pull off the surprise. But I still had to figure out how to get Cazz there without ruining it.He’d taken me out to the meadow again—my favorite date. Though we’d enjoyed several others now too—and we’d just finished eating. He was leaning back against the cab of the truck, looking out at the city lights, his brows a little heavy.“What are you thinking about?” I asked him, though I had a hunch.He had his arm around me and I was leaning on his shoulder. His hand trailed up and
~ CASIMIR ~I came out of the bathing room after a long bath rubbing my hair with a towel, to find my mate standing in the middle of the chamber with her arms folded and looking sternly at my daughter, who sat on the floor in nothing but a diaper, with her chubby legs straight out. She, too, had her arms folded and her lips pursed in the perfect reflection of her mother.The two glared at each other and half my heart went cold, while the other half wanted to splutter with laughter.“Abigail, I have told you—”“No!”Our daughter could only get her tongue around a few words so far, but
~ JESSE (a few weeks later) ~I had just finished nursing Abigail and was holding her on my lap while Reeca sat with me on the couch.Her eyes were bright and she was beginning to smile, so I was tickling her cheeks to see if I could get her to do it. But she was sleepy because she’d just eaten and only yawned and cooed.“She’s a very calm baby,” Reeca commented from the other end of the couch, smiling. She loved babies, and had been so helpful when I was tired—and just for reassurance for me.She was a calm presence in any room, and with Abigail, she showed a lot of delight and joy that she seemed to stifle in other areas of her life.“Reeca,” I said carefully, because I’d b
~ JESSE ~I was too tired to do more than lift my hands to his neck, so I just curled my face into his chest and let him settle us into the chair, cradled in his arms with my ass in his lap.When he’d sat, I had my head resting on his shoulder and my body curled in his arms.“Do you hurt?” he asked quickly.“No, just tired, like I said.”I felt him relax a little then and another chill started in my blood.“Cazz… what’s happened?” I asked quietly.He turned his head to meet my eyes and lifted his hand to comb hair back from my face. His throat bobbed, but his touch was g
~ JESSE (Hours later) ~My dreams were disturbing—my body in pain, screams of terror, darkness, the floor shaking, the mountain falling, humans fleeing and wolves…I tried to break free, tried desperately to open my eyes and to speak, because I knew I was asleep. But all I did was fade… in and out. The nightmares, or nothing.And through it all, his voice.“Heal… live.”My heart ached. My body hurt. My chest didn’t want to expand. It was as if my flesh fought his words, and I didn’t understand.But finally, the dreams faded and I could hear a heartbeat. Little, and quick. And feel warm flesh. And the breath of my m
~ CASIMIR ~I felt the moment the power went out of Jesse. The entire mountain felt it.I howled with triumph and shifted, sprinting towards the room, ecstatic when there was no sense of Maya gripping my mind or stealing anything from me. But of course, there was no power left for her to steal.I prayed and pleaded and ran, Rory and the others coming in my wake. And the moment I broke through that door in my wolf—the only power left to me anymore—everything slowed. Though my body whipped and my mind was singularly focused, it was as if everything happened in slow motion.I caught a bare glimpse of Jesse on the bed, and at first my heart leaped. She was moving, awake, aware,
~ JESSE ~Maya had me sitting up in the bed, curled forward, gripping my knees. Reeca on one side, helping prop me up, a guard on the other.My body was nothing but a conduit for pain. Wave after wave, my entire lower body condensing, contracting, pushing to get this baby out. I could barely think.Cazz was there, so quiet, so distant, but there, calling his encouragement and pushing love at me through the bond.There was a moment when I thought I wouldn’t make it, when I thought my body would give and I would just drift away.But then I caught Maya smiling. Leaning forward between my legs, reaching, grasping, for