it is possible to live without memory but is it possible to live with it? ________it's not real, it's not real, but fuck it is real. I'm lying in his bed with his huge arms around me, his nose buried in my hair. If someone looked at me right now they will probably label me mad.Because although I can't see my face I know it's as red as a tomato. And the fact that this is probably the first non-sexual intimacy between us is enough to freak me out. I gulped reminding myself not to fall for someone who is way too out of my league. I slipped out of his embrace skillfully and left his room taking the remnants of my dress from last night. later that day, I decided to start my day by cleaning his office first. while dusting the old books on the shelf, I found an old packet of cigarettes. I shook the little box a little to know if there is anything in there. One long white cigarette flew out of the box onto the floor. My mind did 100 calculations at that time, it has been a while sin
fuck family dinners. part-I _____The week so far has been good. After her little breakdown, I slept with her and many nights after that. She crawled her way into my bed and now I can't find any reason for her to not be there. I like making her forget her pain, she likes that I can take it away. Things couldn't be more peaceful. This feeling is a lot rare to me but I'm not complaining. I swirl the coffee around my cup. Taking a delicious sip. Ayushi made this coffee herself for me and I must say it tastes delicious. Ace barges into my office with his hard-as-stone demeanor."Sir, Giovanni is here." My free hand went directly to the gun lying on the table. Before I can say anything he barges in. The fucker walked in like he owns this place. He doesn't and he will learn this soon enough. "Dante," I hiss angrily. I'm not happy to see him and he should know this. I mean what the fuck is he doing here?"We need to talk," he said before taking a seat in front of me. I let go of my
fuck family dinners part-II _____They are having a baby. That means my brother is going to deliver an heir, already. I love my brother but the idea of his spawn ruling my business, the business I had built, is a little hard to digest. The room fills up with congratulations and love yous. And I can do is stare at my inevitable future."Nicolas congratulate your brother," my mother softly mumbles. But what I did was to stare at her for a full minute. Ayushi's hot glare met my eyes from across the table letting me know she is not happy. "I'm so happy for you guys," she congratulates again with a smile on her face but her eyes holding mine."We are happy too," my brother says gently kissing his wife.She wants me to congratulate them. "I'm happy for you too, brother," I said. Gabriella twisted around in her seat, her legs touching mine. "Yeah, congratulations."My mother is the only one who acknowledged her presence. "Thank you, darling." I noticed Max sitting a little t
gelatos and Jb? ______"Are you sure you want to leave with him?" Marisa asked. I told her I didn't bring have my car here and because Nicolas offered me a lift im going with him. "Yeah, I'll be fine." "And don't forget to send me the new number, I was mad stressed for you." "I will." I lied. silently sitting in the car I did my best to ignore his presence. she was sitting so near him I can almost smell her on him. Suddenly I noticed a Gelato store is still open. nothing better than dessert after a good meal I thought. But since I dont have any money on me I turned toward him. "can you buy me gelato."he looks a little taken back from my sudden request but instead of denying it he said, "Okay."wow, I didn't expect him to say yes but then again this man is full of surprises. Like a true gentleman, he helped me out of the car. Moments like these are my favorites, you know where he keeps quiet. Letting our bodies do all the talk. The face of the guy behind the counter went from
CHAPTER - 24 | cross my heart hope to die____________before diving into this chapter. Please try to share your views. I tested something with the last chapters. do you guys want more chill chapters like them or not? please share your views and dont forget to vote. _________Memories are a little recollection of what we have been through, good or bad. Just like life. The greed within us tells us to never let go of those good memories and always then confides us to erase the bad memories. How can I explain this? I don't know. I just know that there have been days when the only thing giving me the company was my pillow and the half-empty bottle of vodka, and now suddenly there is someone else, him. Someone to hold my hand, during my nightmares, someone to kiss me in my sleep and tell me everything is alright.How poetic is the dire need to have someone, but the question I ask is? is this love? Am I in love with him? I, Ayushi Tanwar am fucked. I woke up to an empty bed, feeli
Chapter 25 | Dark confided places, just like her eyes. _____________In my line of work, a lot of things are unexpected. The ground beneath your feet can vanish in an instant, replaced by a gaping maw of uncertainty. Sleep, instead of offering solace, becomes a treacherous tightrope walk across a chasm of unsettling premonitions. Every flicker of shadow morphs into a lurking predator, its eyes glinting like malevolent stars in the inky blackness. You become a hunted animal, perpetually on edge, with every creak of floorboard a harbinger of something far worse than the nightmares that claw at your mind.But not even in my twenty-eight years of life I've thought that a woman who I might add is totally on my mercy irrespective of what she thinks, will attack me in my sleep. But she did. I woke up to her digging her nails into my skin, trying her best to choke me. Am I surprised? Yes. Am I angry? Yes. "You fucking bastard," she yells digging her nails deeper. I snatch her little
CHAPTER 26 | the 's' word. ___________After everything that went down tomorrow I was so exhausted I excused myself earlier and this time I went to my room to sleep.waking up alone feels so different now, feels like I did this to myself. at night I did feel like somebody is at my door, but when no one knocked I told myself it was just my imagination. it is silly, to want someone to want you.I lay down on my bed again groaning, burying myself in the pillows. My head shot up as someone entered my room. "You-, Cynthia. it's you. " I shook my head. "of course it's me," she said in her thick accent. "Of course," I said trying my best to hide my disappointment. "Master, wants you to get ready in 30 minutes."I dont care what he wants. "why?"she has probably seen me a million times in this house but this is the first time I can sense her eyes on me.Judging me. Almost like she is studying me up and down."Seems like he wants to take you to work with him.""work?"she looks at my face
CHAPTER 27 | Luminous lights and sex - a vibe.____________She looks like a pornstar.That is the first thing that comes to my mind. Her boobs are huge her waist small her lips full with long blond hair.Damn.I bite my tongue, ceasing myself from asking her, does her back hurts from carrying them.Noticing me noticing her boobs she settles her eyes on me. I've seen thousands of types of expressions people give me when they look at me. She says she is surprised to see me.When she finally left I asked him."And who is she.""She is, None of your business."Seriously?Fine. I was walking away from him when he grabbed my wrist from behind. "Where do you think you going?""Out."I cleared my throat," I just want to..." "explore."His expression didn't give me anything. And I realized every time we are in public his face is hard and emotionless. "Ace." He shouts. "Go with her."_______The whole building is just filled with people with guns, cigarettes, and an unhealthy amount of dumbell
I've never thought I'll live to see this day," I admitted looking at myself in the mirror. Almost 6 months pregnant in a wedding dress, not bad. we have come a long way.Marissa puts a hand on my shoulder comforting me. "I'm so happy for you Boss. "I chuckled through my emotions. "I think we are officially past the formals. You are practically my sister-in-law now, call me Ayushi."The baby sleeping on Marissa's shoulder snorts, making us both laugh. "She is the cutest," I complimented.She nodes patting her back gently, "She sure is."I remember the day she was born, it was raining and I was precisely 4 months pregnant back then. "The weather is very harsh, how about you stay home and wait for her and the baby to come home," Nicolas said getting ready to leave for the hospital."Like hell I am, I'm going Nicolas and that is final."He rolled his eyes at me probably blaming my pregnancy hormones. "Think about the baby.""Oh, common nothing will happen to the baby. I'm always extra c
Chapter - 40 | it's my party and I cry if I want to________I looked around my office taking in the stillness of this place. This is new because this place has never felt this empty. I remember my heart was in my throat when the doctor was checking Ayushi. All I could think about was how much I wanted her to live, I wanted her alive, I wanted her with me. That I got, actually not only that but also the baby. our baby. I wonder when did she get pregnant. was it the night after the movie? or the night I made love to her? I think this will always be a mystery. A smile cropped on my face at the thought of the things I'd planned for her. I'm going to make her the happiest woman in the world. and that is a promise. I walked out of my office with a smile on my face, my life will never be empty it will always be full of her, our child, and all the more I'm going to give her. The eyes feel on her petite frame standing in front of the mirror in a black dress. I choose this dress for her
Chapter - 39| is this goodbye?_____"Why? Did they all leave? I ask him as soon as I woke up. "They will be back soon. I invited them all for dinner this weekend to announce the baby." I nodded my head dreading their reaction. Nicolas's mother hates me, she thinks I trapped him with me. "Where is Myra?""Downstairs with Dorian." I visibly cringed listening to his name. "What is he still doing here?" I half yelled expected for him to fight back but instead, he just sighed. "He is taking her with him."Over my dead body is that ever happening. "Myra," I yelled getting up from the bed. "Fuck, Ayushi. Slow down at least," he says but this time he doesn't stop me. I went straight to the guest room, where Myra was staying last just to find him in there. "Get away from her!"I pushed her back from him to me hardly. "Don't worry, Myra I will talk to Nicolas he will protect you. We will protect Nate.""Ayushi," Myra says draping her hands around me and hugging me. "What Happened?" This
Chapter - 38 | bad parenting is an underrated crime.________"Where are Myra and Nate?""They are safe.""Good, and what the thing you were saying that's incorrect sir. I'm not pregnant," I said awkwardly smiling around the crowd.He looks me dead in the eyes and goes. "You are pregnant."when I was a child I always used to wonder what I will be when I grow up, will I be strong like the women on the cover of magazines? will I be elegant like the 8th grade English teacher? will I ever love someone as much as I loved my grandma?all these questions and still somewhat fearful that will I be powerless like my mother? what if I end up like her?anyone can be a parent but not everyone deserves to be one, is a line worth billions.but do I deserve to be a parent? I already love this child more than anything in the whole world and yet I can't have it.I pinched my eyes close fearing that this is true. what have I done? what have I done? He doesn't want this baby, he will never accept it. and
CHAPTER - 37 | only love and death changes all things______two weeks later my body feels like a ticking bomb. there's a voice in my head that it's stupid to look for her. she never wanted to stay here in the first place. But that's only the rational part of me, and personally im anything but rational. Ace barged into my office, "Sir, we found something." "what?" I asked just then my phone ringed. "Dorian," I hissed as I saw his name flashing on my phone. I'll make it when all of this is over, I never see or hear from him again. "we have a clue, where they could be."I didn't waste any time picking up the phone, "bring your men, Costello we are going hunting." __ "wait, I have to tell you something," Dorian says as he comes out of our cars. The information Dorian gave was correct, they are in the city disguising among the people. a smile crept on my face, tonight you will sleep in my bed, sugar. "what? you dont want the best friend anymore?"I knew I kicked a nerve when he cle
Chapter - 36 | agony__________Dorian's pov for the past 5 years, there is a noose around my neck,So tight,Almost determined to break my neck. I've been living on the edge for the past almost half a decade. For a man born in blood, violence is necessary.I've lived and I've killed all because of her.I still get nightmares from the night I killed her, or at least I thought I killed her.I mourned her death, relieved her memory, and then I buried her name.She betrayed me, again.I threw the tumbler forward, shattering the tv screen. My veins feel like they are on fire and my skin feels like it's burning.Today when I saw Ayushi in Nicolas's house, I was shocked. She was supposed to be dead so does her friend.But seeing her alive standing in front of me wrapped in his arms, one thing is clear. Myra is alive.I killed her, she refused to die. It's almost amusing how many times these girls have played me.She didn't give me anything but I will find out where she is.And this time
Chapter - 35 | she a runner__________I entered my room to find Myra standing by the window looking out. I asked Nate how he doing before approaching her."So?" She asks ruffling a hand down her dress."What happened?"I sucked in a breath. Fuck even I don't know what just happened. I saw Dorian after almost what 4 years, and his first instinct was to kill me.Classic motherfucker. There was a time I thought we were friends I really liked him and Myra together. They were like the power couple you see in old spy movies, but like a movie, the thing between them didn't last long."He was shocked to see me alive before he pointed his gun at me."Myra snorted. She looked at Nate this time staring at his head. She leans in closer so only I can listen."You think we can kill him this time." I made a displeased look. She furrowed her eyebrows, "what? He nearly killed me the last time I saw him."This single memory brings back so many stomach knotting feelings, I can't even begin to express.
Chapter - 34|sins of our past usually comes back to haunt our present____________successfully dodging millions of Myra's questions I somehow made it to the time when he comes back. I felt his presence the moment he stepped into the house. He and I need to talk. a serious fucking talk. "here comes your Romeo," she says gesturing towards him. If Nicolas heard him he didn't react. with his eyes, on me, he says, "come on." I folded my arms over my breasts. "No, I'm busy," I challenged. "I have to talk to you about something," he says his eyes brows. Oh? so you are confused, man? im confused. "doesn't matter, I'm busy."he clenched his jaw looking at Myra for a minute like maybe it's her fault. "fine, get dressed some people are coming over tonight."this is not time for a party, for crying out loud. "what people?""whose drive we have," he says annoyed but collets himself quick. "the American bastard is coming here to get that fucking thing off my chest."God must hate me. he hates
Chapter - 33 | Dad?_________"Bye," I said as Nicolas left for work. It's early in the morning but everything that happened last night didn't help me sleep.Finish the job and get rid of her.His uncle's words are still in my head. This must be the plan all along, right? He was interested in me until he knew my secret and now when he knows so much about me, I'm no use to him.He warmed me up and made me open myself to him. And now he will let me go.Somebody cleared her throat distracting me from my trail of thoughts.Myra stood on top of the stairs with a freshly woken Nate holding her hand. "Good morning."I smiled at their cuteness. "Good morning, come down. Breakfast is ready."Nate let go of her hand. "I'll race you."She shook her head. "No, no running on the stairs."Nate ignored her and came running down the stairs colliding with my legs. "Oho, relax little guy.""Ay, I know you make the best eggs in the world." He holds my hand. "Make them for me, please."Finally, someone w