chapter 6

I need to take the next step. I need the power to protect my family.  That teacher that used to came has found his carrier destroyed because he slapped me. It was something that was bound to happen. I didn’t know how to behave before. Before, in my last life, I studied a lot to go to the academy but meeting William was a turn event. He insisted that going there was a waste of time. I still remember the load of books that I read. First, I need to go to the academy, but I think it’s not time yet. I’ll leave it for when I meet William.

 Madeleine and I are good friends. He has eighteen now. It’s good to grow up. His coming-of-age ceremony is around the corner. I need to prepare a gift for him. I don’t know what to gift him. Madeleine likes books, but I don’t know his preferences. He used to read political one or magical ones; he rarely read the other types. What to gift him? Should I make him something? I don’t know. 

" Mom, can I go out today? I want to gift my friend Madeleine a present for his coming of age ceremony. "

" Oooooh, how sweet of you to do that! You have permission to go out, take a knight with you, stay safe! "

I took a carriage and headed out, taking with me Charles, a knight in my family. The ride wasn’t that special, boring as always. I went from shop to shop. I walked a lot. Nothing seems to please my mind. This is the last shop that I’ll go in. If I don’t find anything, I’ll give up and make him something by hands.

" Judging by how much you hesitated my Lady. I can tell that you are looking for something different than usual, " said the shopkeeper.

" You are right, shopkeeper! I am in awe; I can’t seem to find something that pleases me, my friend’s coming of age ceremony is around the corner. "

" I may have something for you. It isn’t used as much these days, and it may be considered a bit outdated, but the colour is still good. "

" Thank you for showing me this. I’ll take it. "

It was a Renald stone. It’s a gem that no one knows its power yet. It was admired only for its beauty. I know what I’ll gift him. I’ll reforge the stone gem and make it as a bracelet. It will have a specific power to enhance abilities or seal them. I wish it will come in handy.

After getting dressed up by my maids, I head to the coming-of-age ceremony of Madeleine. Once there, Madeleine spotted me faster, oh, searching for familiar faces.

" I congratulate you on your coming-on-age ceremony, sir Madeleine. I hope that you’ll become mature enough to hold on to your cat. "

" Teasing me again, aren’t you? If you keep this attitude, no one will fall in love with you, you are known now like a devil disguised as an angel, do you think that mom will confiscate my cat now that I am an adult? »

" Who knows? I am not known as a devil disguised as an angel. You created that. »

" Right, right, you are all well-mannered until you come in front of me, you forget all about it, see how I don’t belong to the same world as you. I am an adult. "

" If I didn’t come I am afraid that you won’t have any friend here. "

" You never change! I don’t want to be murdered, so I’ll go, I don’t want to die yet, I cherish my life. "

Indeed, I spot my two brothers glaring with murderous intent towards him. I wonder what they will say if I told them about my resolution to go to the academy. Will they hug me until I stop breathing? Maybe, they will lock me. Just kidding. But I need to prove myself in this society to protect them well. I went to walk around the estate. I don’t like sitting too much. It’s too boring. I am happy because I am not the same shy Bonine. I learnt to express myself more openly and made a friend. A true friend. Madeleine is a good one, not like Alma, that snake, a snake is too much for her, she is worse, at least we know that we can be aware of a snake and defend ourselves. As I was walking elegantly, I didn’t notice a stone and fell. What a day! Why must I fall and ruin my dress, it’s not like I really care, but I swore to be an elegant lady, not as in my past life; I was shy and plain.

It was the same as back then, in my past life. I was kneeling, and he was sitting on a sofa, drinking tea gracefully. I was pleading for my mother, she was sick, and I needed money, I was crying t that time. I didn’t want anything else but the cost of my mother’s medicine. She was dead because he rejected me. He said that he was disappointed with what I’ve done, the murder of my father. I was looking forward to seeing him helping me, but I was naive. I don’t know despite all that. I still loved him back then. He knew how to manipulate me. I am not ready. I am scared.

" It hurts a lot, my Lady! "

It is William, my first meeting with him in this life. I didn’t expect it. It’s too early for it. I need to smile. Smile, smile. What’s with that frightened look, do you want him to manipulate you again? For the sake of my family, I need to smile. I cannot move. No, this is how it used to be, but now I am not like before. I am confident, and I worked hard to give up now.

"Thank you, sir! I slipped, it was ungrateful of me! "

I offer him my best smile, good, that’s how it must be. I need to take control of my fate. He is astonished, right, I am mature now, and I know manners.

" You are really mature, my Lady! I am William from the Ramezinat family. Pleased to meet you, my Lady! "

This smile is why I fell for him and tried so hard to reach him. It doesn’t work on me now. I smile too, and introduces myself. I excused myself immediately saying that my friend is searching for me. I walk away fast this time. I don’t think too much now. I need to get out of there. It was scary. I thought that I’d pluck his eyes. For the first time in my life, I felt disgusted by his appearance.

I reached a lake and began to sing. I need to sing. Singing was my only refuge back then. I’ll trust my inner instinct and sing.

Hondasen imasolabara

Imeligonomea

Sindoriya gochimirikara

Soraen winahiya

Serunar maaliya

Terunar gaaarima…

Ancient language, that’s what it was, an ancient song that I heard from a dying man in the war. I did it. I calmed myself down. I hope that no one heard me. No one will believe that a young girl knows the ancient language, the language of Ira. I was able to decipher a lot of books, but William took all my hard work for him. He was praised for something he had never done. If I could save my mother, I wouldn’t be kneeling for him. I want to be free just for a little time.

I turn around and notice a handkerchief tied in a low branch. Someone heard me, and he left it. I wonder what he thinks of my song. I like singing, but I don’t like to be judged in a bad way. I return to the party. It is lively as it was. I spot Madeleine looking at some girl. Wait, I know those eyes.

" I can’t believe that someone is in love. "

" I am not, what are you saying? You don’t know even what the word love mean? "

" Don’t underestimate me! Who is she? And don’t feign ignorance because I won’t buy it. "

" She… the daughter of a lower rank noble that I met while sneaking out in the city. Her name is Raylia Mendel. "

I don’t know her. Strange, I don’t have any memory of her. It seems that I changed the flow of some things. Oooh, dear!

" I can give you some help if you want. "

" Really! What shall I do? "

" Why do I see a puppy instead of my friend? You are too much. If you want to talk to her, learn to speak with confidence, if you stay shy, she’s going to be taken. "

" Really thank you for yooooooooouuuur precious advice, I didn’t know it beeeeeefooooooooore. "

" I am talking seriously, if she is a kind girl, she’ll accept you if you are confident enough, and you have a higher rank. "

" I’ll go talk to her. "

" Go and introduce yourself directly, this way she’ll realize who are you and cling to you… Wait, where are you going? "

" You are going to trash talk about her. I know you in this. "

Do I have such a low image in his eyes? I sigh. I return to our house with my brothers. I’ll treasure them more before going to the academy.

" Where did you go to the Sarlintine house? "

" Brother Durian, I was walking around the place, it was so big. "

" Ooooh !! That’s good! I thought that you met some tigers, rumours say that they raise one there. "

In fact, the tiger that they were talking about was the cat. Its name is Tiger.

I remember the handkerchief that I picked earlier. The fabric is expensive. It has two initials; An E and C. Examining it will bring me nothing, I’ll ask Durian. He is the best choice in this because he won’t ask me where I got it. I found his training.

" Brother, do you have any idea what the initials E and C in a handkerchief mean? "

" It must be Edward Carmander, the crown prince. Why? "

" I was chatting with some girls at the party, and a girl found one with those initials. I was curious about it too. "

The crown prince, I can’t imagine that he left it for me. He already has one that is going to be with him. It must be someone else. I am okay with it if it doesn’t bring me trouble.