Chapter One  ~My Shitty Life~

~Gwen~

If misery were a person, it would be me. I don't need a reminder that my life pretty much sucks. How I survived my pack bullying me all these years is still a mystery to me.

I continue to scrub Tara's toilet floor and I need to finish up in five minutes to take care of other chores my pack had for me, like throwing the trash, washing the dishes, and trimming the lawn that had decided to grow twice its normal size this year.

I am getting frustrated with living such a life and at this rate, I think I might drop dead soon.

I can't wait for the night of the Lunar Convergence. That seems to be my only way out of this sadness. During the Lunar Convergence, is when I finally get to find my mate.

I clocked eighteen two months ago. The right age for the females in San Francisco's pack community to find a mate. Although I look forward to that night, I am still very much scared.

Who would even want a girl like me? A weakling. A girl yet to shift, it's disappointing enough that I am wolfless.

A rag hits my face. It jerked me back to the present.

"How long will it take you to finish scrubbing the floor?" Tara's face tightened.

"I'm almost done," I whispered.

"Done! Are you kidding me? Look behind you. What is that stain?"

I looked back to check for the stain, but Tara kicked the bucket of water, spilling the whole content on the floor. I gasped at what she'd done. I couldn't fight because she's the beta's daughter and his favorite child.

Disobeying her was like disobeying the beta. While growing up, I have tried to fight her back many times but I end up being the one suffering.

"You were scrubbing like you didn't want to finish it. Well, I just fulfilled your wish. You can stay here forever," She hissed.

I looked up at her, clenching my hands into fists. That's not because I am about to punch her pathetic face. I will be dead before I even try.

Clenching my hands was the best I could do to calm myself down. Poor me.

"Slug. You'll never escape this life of yours. It suits you perfectly." She chuckled, walking away.

Thanks to the Alpha's son, Jasper. The pack calls me a slug. I was identified as 'the pack's slug' in school and the entire neighbourhood. Jasper bullies me alongside many others in the pack. I don't allow it to bother me anymore because I am used to the name-calling and harsh treatment.

I dislike all those who call me such names and treat me badly but it hasn't been possible for me to dislike Jasper. I have tried to hate him but I couldn't.

That's because I am not being honest about how I feel about him. It is a secret I am willing to guard forever. If anyone ever finds out about my true feelings for him. I will be dragged to the point where — I will not like to think of right now.

As an ordinary girl among extraordinary people, all my peers in the Pacific Moonrise pack and the other packs were already shifters but here I am, a girl with no self-esteem. My lack of shifting only made matters worse.

I was careful not to get into fights or cause trouble because I would be dead in a matter of seconds. To them, I am just a human with a werewolf gene, someone they could harm without even lifting a finger.

****

It took me another hour to clean up the mess Tara had made.

"Hah. Finally, you're done." She uncrossed her legs and rose from her seat. "I dropped the clothes you will be washing on the sofa over—"

"But you said I was only going to scrub your toilet today. You didn't mention clothes."

She walked up to me and slapped me. I am used to that too.

"How dare you interrupt me while I'm speaking to you?" She bared her teeth. "I'll tell you when you're done. I want my clothes washed. Do it and stop complaining."

I nod in response.

"I have noticed you are becoming bolder and you protest more often now when you are told to do something." She forced a laugh. "Is it in any way because of the Lunar convergence?" She looked me directly in the eye.

"You must be dreaming. Do you think anyone will want you? They will be embarrassed by you. Read my lips. The Lunar Convergence will end without you having a mate."

My eyes sting me from the tears I was trying to hold back. She was trying so hard to shatter the only hope I clung to.

"How— are you— so sure?" I stammered. I bit my lips to keep myself from crying.

"That's because you are a nobody," she laughed. "You will be back here next week still as you are. A slug!"

I couldn't take it anymore. Standing here listening to all the horrible things she was saying was like taking poison.

I walk to the sofa to pick up her clothes, then shut the door to the laundry room. I fell to my knees immediately my back hit the door. I was all alone here, a good place and time to cry.

Was I stupid for hoping for the best for myself? What if Tara is right? What if I never find my mate?

The Pacific Moonrise pack is the largest and wealthiest of all the four packs in San Francisco. The pack community of San Francisco is made up of four packs; the Pacific Moonrise pack, the Golden Gates Guardians (the second-largest pack), the Bayview Silver pack and the Ember Twilight pack. Sometimes I wish I could just wake up and find myself out of here.

But where will I go? I have no place to go if I leave. That's why I think that the only solution for me is to wait for my mate. One who will protect me from every threat.

I have learnt to survive on my own without reporting to my parents about those bullying me. I realized the bullying only got worse. They said I was a crybaby who ran crying to my parents over every little thing.

Since then I have refrained from telling them that I'm treated within the pack as an outsider. I always put on a fake smile.

By the way, as an adult now, I have made myself an invisible shell I crawl in and out of and music helps me relax and forget the pain sometimes.

I love my parents and I do not want anything troubling them. Adopting me as their child was something I was grateful for. They took me in when I was just a baby.

Even my only sibling, Lionel, their son, wasn't nice to me either while we were growing up. Although he's much better now.

I focused on washing Tara's clothes in silence, worrying about the sad life I'd continue to live if my mate didn't turn up soon.