Chapter 9: I Think You're Super Awesome

Josh and Darin hit the gym early. Neither had lifted weights recently, so they decided to take advantage of the free morning. They eased into their normal routine, and it didn't take long for them to get the hang of it again.

The guys spent the hour talking about nothing but the task at hand, and Josh was grateful for the lack of chitchat. He was still upset by the outcome of the game from the night before. They had known going in that it was going to be tough. They had been ahead for most of the game, though, and a couple of the guys had just relaxed too much, and when you relaxed too much, it made for lazy gameplay. The other team took advantage and converted the points they needed to squeak by with the win.

After they were finished with their last set of leg presses, they made their way out of the weight room, and then out of the gym. Josh had just finished in the shower when he plopped down on his bed. As he laid there, the effects of the game the night before and the weights that morning took its toll, and he drifted off to sleep.

He was jolted awake by the sound of his cell phone. He felt so rested, he was sure it was Payton calling because he was late. That wouldn't make any sense since she didn't have his cell number. When he saw he still had an hour before he had to pick her up, he was able to calm down enough to actually pick up the ringing phone. He smiled when he saw the number on his caller ID.

"Well, look who finally decided to call," Josh said in place of a greeting.

"Whatever, dickwad. Can't help it if I'm super awesome and you're not."

Josh busted up laughing, "Super awesome?! Super awesome?! No one who uses the phrase 'super awesome' is actually super awesome. Really Jax."

"Fuck off," Jackson retorted playfully.

"Such a great come back," Josh lowered his voice a little to mimic his brother, "Fuck off."

"I'm hanging up now."

"No, no, no. You never call. I'll stop... because I'm super awesome that way."

Jackson growled into the phone, "Listen, those dates you sent me, are those still the dates you're coming?"

Josh sobered up. Things always changed in Jackson's world, and now he worried that he was about to be out of a trip to New York.

"Uh, yeah. That okay?"

"Yeah, they sprung a field exercise on us, but I'll be back the night before you come in."

Josh sighed, "No problem. Just send me an email and let me know what I need to do when I get there."

"Roger."

"Speak English," Josh teased.

"Shut it. Later."

"Hey, Jax?" Jackson grunted in response, "In case you didn't know, I think you're super awesome."

"Screw you."

"Bye."

*

"Come on," Hailey cajoled, "just put that one on."

Payton had heard that phrase more times than she could count in the past few hours. It had started with the hair. "Come on Payton, just let me curl it." Then when Payton had started to do her makeup the way she normally did, Hailey had struck again. "Oh come on Payton, you need to do something different. This is a big night." Now they were onto clothes, and Payton had been trying on outfits for the past half hour. The first two were fine in Payton's eyes, but Hailey found at least a handful of things wrong with both. After declaring that there wasn't a suitable thing to wear in her own closet, Hailey moved to her own and started to pull stuff out.

"Oh! I have the perfect dress!" Hailey said clapping her hands. "I bought it a few months ago and never wore it. Looks like you'll be the first."

Hailey started to flip through the clothes hanging and after a long moment Payton wondered if she'd dreamed up this perfect dress. How many dresses could one person have anyway? Payton liked clothes and had her fair share, but this was just a tad ridiculous. She was about to tell Hailey as much when the dress, still wrapped in the plastic garment bag, appeared. Payton had to hand it to her, it was a nice dress.

"Oh, crap! You've gotta hurry. He'll be here any minute. Get this on," Hailey said practically throwing the dress at her.

Payton dressed and didn't have the nerve to look in the mirror just yet. The navy, strapless, dress was a little more fitted than she was used to wearing, and while it flared at the waist, she was really worried that it was showing a lot of rolls in her midsection.

Hailey stood back appraising her work. "You look hot!"

"Whatever you say. I think it shows a lot of bumps up here," Payton said motioning to the top of the dress.

"The only bumps I see are the bumps you want to see up there. I wish my boobs looked that good in dresses like that."

Payton snorted. "Well, I'll take it then. I've always got boob envy."

A knock at the door interrupted their playful banter, and suddenly Payton's stomach dropped. The nerves kicked up a notch, and she wasn't sure she was ready for all this. Hailey left to get the door, and she grabbed her sandals and after slipping them on, took another look in the mirror. This was as good as it got. She grabbed her purse and headed for the living room, and when she spotted him standing in the living room talking to Hailey, she knew she was in trouble. He looked good, really good standing there in his khaki pants and white button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Payton swallowed hard and tried to recover from just looking at him. "This is going to be a long night," she thought to herself.

Josh spotted her and smiled. "Wow, you look great."

"Thanks," Payton replied, blushing. "You look nice too."

"You ready?"

"Sure."

As they headed out of town and toward the city, the silence was deafening. She wasn't sure what to ask him about or to talk about, and she sure as heck didn't know what you did on dates. This was all probably a huge mistake, and she should have known better. Now she wasn't only stuck on a date with him, but she was in the car with him for an hour before they'd even get to dinner. That meant it'd be an hour home after dinner too. Yeah, this was going to be a long night.

*

Josh didn't know Payton well enough, but her body language was clear, she was uncomfortable. Hell, he was too. He kept trying to come up with something to break the ice, something funny, some kind of question, anything. Everything sounded dumb.

"How's your day been?" Maybe that would get the ball rolling.

"F-fine," she stuttered and then sighed. "It wasn't bad. I just took it easy most of the day. You?"

"Pretty much the same. Didn't do a lot. Went to the gym, slept, talked to my brother."

"Brother?" she asked. "How many brothers and sisters do you have?"

"Two. Bryce is two years older, and Jax is two minutes younger."

"Two minutes?" She sounded confused. Not more than a couple seconds after it was out of her mouth, though, it hit her. "You're a twin?"

"Yeah."

"That must be interesting. Is it hard to tell you guys apart?"

"Well, we aren't really around each other that much anymore, but when we are, it's pretty easy to tell us apart. He's at West Point so he's got one of those military cuts so that alone makes it easy. It was a different story growing up though."

"West Point? Wow, that's a pretty big deal. Where's your other brother?"

Josh felt the rise of jealously as Payton praised his brother, but the fact that she moved on so quickly helped him put a lid on it. He hated that he still felt like he had to compete with Jackson, but old habits die hard.

Josh cleared his throat. "He moved to Arizona with his fiancée."

"Where's home at?"

She was rambling, but he'd take it. He was happy she was talking now and not looking like she wanted to crawl into a hole. "Omaha. What about you?"

"Paris." She chuckled. "In Texas."

"Yeah, the slight southern drawl doesn't really sound like it came from France."

"You never know, I've had people ask. And is my accent really that bad?"

Josh grinned at her. "No, I thought south, but I'm actually surprised that it isn't thicker."

"I've worked hard to mask it. I don't like sounding like one of the Dixie Chicks."

"It's kind of cute." He looked over and saw her give him a half smile. "What about you? Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

She paused for longer than he thought someone would. "No, it's just me and my mom."

That was it. Nothing else. "Your Dad?"

"I don't know my dad. He was out of the picture before I was born."

Josh realized why things had tanked and knew he needed to change the topic, but he wasn't sure what was safe. Something as simple as, "What's your family like?" wasn't so simple with Payton. Thankfully she changed it for them.

"What's your major?"

"Phys Ed. I also work as an Athletic Trainer from time to time, and I help out the athletic department on campus. What about you?"

"Business Administration. I haven't decided if I'm going to take some time off after I graduate next year or go right into my MBA."

"So you're a junior?" he asked without even thinking.

Payton gave him a look. "Do you not know anything about Geoff at all?"

"Oh, I guess that was kind of a stupid question, huh?"

"What about you?" she asked reversing the question back at him.

"Senior."

"Oh, I wish I was graduating this year. I really enjoy most of my classes and college life, but I'm just ready to move on. I guess you could say I already have a bad case of senioritis. Pretty sad, huh?"

Josh laughed out loud at the term. "That stuff exists? I never understood that saying. They're going to have to drag me out of this place kicking and screaming. I love it here."

Josh was glad to see Payton visibly relaxing. She wasn't sitting so rigid, and her hand had even drifted off her lap and down by the shifter in his car. He wasn't sure if it was intentional or not, but whatever. The longer trip into Wichita had done exactly what he'd hoped it would. They were calmer, and they'd gotten to know each other a little. The fact Payton seemed to be opening up a little more was even better.

*

As Payton and Josh waited for their food to arrive, the conversation kept flowing. Why she had found Josh so intimidating before, she'd never know. He was about the most laid-back guy she'd met. She had no doubt he could be intense and focused when he wanted to be, but he knew how to switch it off. All those things made it hard for her to remember why she didn't want to date, why she didn't need this kind of relationship in her life.

"So, why'd you decide to get your degree in Phys Ed?" Payton asked.

"It's pretty simple. I like to play sports, and I like working out. I thought it'd be a good fit. The past couple of summers, I taught a couple of kid's classes back home, and it's always been easy. I never feel like I'm working. That make any sense?"

He'd really thought it out, and she had to admire him for that. "Yeah, perfect sense."

"Why business?"

"It sounds stupid after your answer."

"Didn't you ever have those teachers tell you, 'The only stupid answer is the one not... asked'? So, I guess it was a question, not an answer, but still."

Payton smiled at his comment. He was really sweet to make her feel better about herself. "I want to eventually know enough to own my own company. I've never wanted to work for anyone else. I want to be my own boss." Payton shook her head after a second, "Sorry, that seems really pretentious doesn't it?"

"Pretentious? That's a big word. Not sure if my jock brain can compute."

The server interrupted their banter with their meal. The steak and vegetables were out of this world, and that got her wondering, "So, how'd you find out about this place?"

"A guy on the team recommended it. I'd never heard of it, even though the guys and I are down in this area from time to time. There's this little cigar bar we like to hang out at that's not too far from here. I'm sure they've got some live music playing tonight. If you want to go after we're done, we can."

By the time dinner finished, the pair decided just to head home. Payton found it ironic that on the way to Wichita she'd grown more relaxed as the miles passed, but on the way home, she grew more tense. They'd both been flirting off and on all night, and she really did like the guy. Maybe it was time to give up this stupid idea that she was going to end up like her mom, and just start dating. Because really, when all was said and done, that was what was holding her back. The idea that she might become her mother; the unwed, pregnant teen who had to live at home the rest of their life with no one.

Josh pulled the parking brake, turned the engine off, and then shifted so he was looking in her direction. Payton wanted him to kiss her, but at the same time, she didn't. She wasn't sure she would want to stop if he did. She'd kept that part of her bottled up her whole life.

Josh must have sensed something because he reached over, pushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear, and then caressed her cheek. He looked deep into her eyes. "I really want to kiss you... can I?"

Payton closed her eyes and licked her lips. It was now or never. She'd been thinking about, no, she'd been fantasizing about his lips on hers, wondering if they were as soft as they looked. She looked up from under her lashes and gave a small nod.

Soft, warm lips touched hers, caressed hers, and her eyelids drooped shut again. Something stirred in her that she hadn't felt in a long time, something she had begun to wonder if it were even still there. A small noise made its way up from deep within her chest when she felt the tip of his tongue coaxing her mouth open. She didn't make him work for it all that much because she was just as eager to move forward too. Payton's hands latched onto Josh's wrists, and it was all she could do just to hang on for the ride. She was so lost in the sensations that she didn't hear the cell phone ringing at first.

After several seconds, though, she couldn't ignore it anymore. "Your phone," she murmured against his lips.

Without taking his lips from her, he was able to silence the call, and it wasn't long before they were right back to where they'd been when the call had come in. Payton didn't have a lot of experience kissing guys, but she knew that she'd have a hard time finding anyone who could measure up to Josh. Payton's hands tangled in his unruly hair and pulled.

He groaned.

The phone rang.

Removing one hand from her hair, he pulled the phone from his pocket, silenced it, and threw it in the cup holder. "Where were we?"

He didn't have time to even get back to the kiss when the phone rang again. Payton tried to pull away, but he just held her in place with a hand on the back of the head.

"'Scuse me while I deal with this," he told her before grabbing the phone. "Better be good Wes, I'm in the middle of something."

Whatever he was listening to kept his attention. It must be something important. The more time he spent on the phone, which in reality was more like mere seconds than minutes, Payton's resolve started to build back up. The walls she'd built over the years started to erect again. She remembered why dating wasn't a great idea, and how, if just one date with Josh could lead to a kiss like that, she could easily lose herself in it all. She needed to be very careful with him. She knew it wouldn't end well. Well, it'd end great if all she were looking for was a night in bed, and she was sure after a kiss like that, Josh would not disappoint, but she didn't want that, didn't want a boyfriend. To sit there and make out with him was leading him on, and she wasn't that kind of girl.

Mustering up every ounce of resolve Payton made the decision to get out of the car and head home. Acting before she could talk herself into staying, she grabbed her purse and opened the door. "Thanks for a great night," she told him right before she shut the door. She heard him get out of the car, but she couldn't look back, she had to keep moving. If she didn't she knew she'd give in to what she ultimately knew she wanted but couldn't ever have.