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Chapter 50
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Only Regrets Chapter 51
I embrace him in a tight hug and we both kiss each other. He tangles his fingers with mine and holds my hands tightly, pinning my hands on both sides of my head in the bed. His kisses grow wild, leaving me gasping for air. He starts trailing kisses all over my collarbone. When he's done kissing my neck, he lowers his head down below my belly. Gasping for air, I arch my back as his lips find my soft spot between my thighs. The first lick sends waves of pleasure in my body. My hands clutch on the bed sheet as tight as it can, while a loud moan escapes my mouth. My pulse quickens and tears brim in my eyes as he continues his teasings, making me moan again and again. With a slight force, he enters his fingers. I cry out in pleasure, arching my back as his fingers and tongue work like magic. As a knot forms in my stomach, I feel more impatient. My moans grow louder. “What the heck are you doing to my body, Ethan?” I cry out. Tears trickle down my eyes, as my whole body tenses
Only Regrets Chapter 52
As I gain consciousness again, I witness Ethan sleeping peacefully in between my legs, hugging my waist tightly, his head laying on my stomach. On the spacious king-sized bed, he seems completely at ease. How peaceful it is to see him like this! I can literally stare at this guy for my whole life. My hands tangle in his hair, and I begin to caress his hair, feeling at peace and happiness. In this moment, everything feels perfect—like a dream; and I'm filled with an overwhelming joy and contentment. Leaning his head back, Ethan stares into my eyes with his sleepy eyes. His lips curl into a smile. I grin back. Crawling to me, he lays beside me, pulling the blanket up to our waists; and tugs me closer to him, wrapping his arms around my waist and giving a soft peck on my forehead. I feel at ease. Our bodies are half covered. I lay my head on his chest, caressing his silver cross pendant that he always wears. His grip tightens around my waist. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I s
Only Regrets Chapter 53
I don't know why I let my guard down last night. I can't let that happen again. I can't trust him, or myself—to let my emotions take over my mind again. I need to put my walls back up. I need to guard up and protect myself. You are a drama queen, Belle. You always act whenever needed. Did you forget that? Today's the same as other days. Just start your drama. Act as if you don't care. Act as if you are not embarrassed, even when you are. Act as if the last night was just the result of your sexual desires and does not mean anything to you. All you have to do is just—act. Putting the same badass bitch facade on my face, which I always put to hide the real emotions on my face, I turn to see Mr. Wilson. There's an evil smirk on his face; and my eyes land on the red purple marks on his neck—that is obviously given by me. “Why did you slam the door?” I growl. “So that you don't run away from here,” he retorts. “Move your hand. I need to go.” “I won't. I need you to eat something
Only Regrets Chapter 54
After reaching the dorm room, I don't see Emily here. She might have gone somewhere. Thankfully, she isn't here. I want to be alone for a while. I need some time to process whatever is happening to me. Throwing my bag, phone, and the bouquet on the bed, as I try to sit, I wince. My lower back is aching badly. I've eaten outside; I can take pills now. I swallow the pills with water; and then, my eyes land on the bouquet again. Why did I not throw it somewhere? Why does it hurt me to hurt him? Do I have feelings for Ethan? “It's too early to consider it as love, but too late to consider it as nothing,” I murmur and pick up the bouquet again in my arms. It hurts me when I hurt you, Ethan. Why can't you just leave me alone? I am not ready to develop any deep, intense feelings for anyone. I don't know if you truly love me or not. Even if you do, I still don't want to be with you. I don't want any more drama. I know you are the same like your ex best friend, Aiden. I'll trust you, s
Only Regrets Chapter 55
As soon as I reach Aiden's apartment, I see the door is not locked; it's a bit open. How did he forget to lock the door today? Is he alright? Is there any thief in his home? Should I call the police? At least I should check first. I enter the apartment, taking slow steps. The apartment is filled with a haze of smoke, and the acrid smell of burnt tobacco lingering in the air. Empty bottles are scattered all over the floor, some tipped over, and liquid spilling out. Ashtrays are overflowing with cigarette butts, and there are crumpled packs of cigarettes laying around. Whole place looks like a mess. Did he drink and smoke the whole night? Obviously. Because I broke up with him. He slapped me. I can't tolerate abuse. And then, my gaze shifts to Aiden who's settled on the couch, holding a cigarette in one hand and a bottle of alcohol in another, his eyes glued to the flickering screen of the TV. My daily vlogs which I used to shoot only for Aiden—because he used to say he likes watch
Only Regrets Chapter 56
As Aiden's grip vanishes on my hair, my knees feel weak and give way, witnessing my long hair scattered on the floor. Tears roll down from my eyes as I collapse on the floor. “Now you are looking pretty…darling,” Aiden says, making my blood boil in fury. I grit my teeth. Settling at my feet again, I grip his jacket tightly. “Are you a monster or what? Do you not have any emotions, Aiden? What are you? How could you do that to me?” I scream aloud, my lower lip jutting out from my sobs. “I warned you I am a bad person. Why are you crying now? It was your decision to become my girlfriend. No one forced you Belle.” More tears stream down my face, as I realize he's right. Why am I asking him? It's my fault I chose him as my boyfriend. Obviously, it's my fault. “Why is it hurting you that I let Ethan fuck me? You are not my boyfriend anymore. We have broken up.” He pulls me closer to him, holding my arms and glaring into my eyes. “I told you there's no option to break up in our re
Only Regrets Chapter 57
Why is this idiot here? Lest Aiden will hurt him too. I can't see anything bad happening to Ethan because of me. Please go away from here, Ethan. Please! Ethan's jaw tenses as his gaze shifts to my inner thigh, his eyes blazing and chest heaving up and down in fury. I arch my body to see what he's staring at. And then, my jaw drops, witnessing a bruise on my inner thigh. “How dare you touch her, motherfucker?” Ethan's loud voice echoes across the whole place, as he settles at his feet and storms towards Aiden, who's struggling to sit up on the floor. My heart races with terror, anticipating the next outcome as Ethan grips Aiden's collar, pinning him to the floor and sitting above him; and then, he begins to shoot constant wild punches on his jaw, each punch landing with a sickening loud thud. My mouth drops open and my pulse quickens, feeling haunted by his wrath. “Sister-in-law…” Alex’s voice guards me off. I turn my face slightly, witnessing Alex, Colin, and Sam also in the apa
Only Regrets Chapter 58
Ethan is driving recklessly, fuming with rage. His grip is too tight on the steering wheel. His jaw is tightening as he increases the speed. His hands are imprinted with Aiden's blood. Feeling scared of his wrath, I grip the seat tightly. “Ethan, we'll be dead if you continue driving like this,” I say, breaking the ice between us. And then, without any warning, Ethan pulls the car over to the side of the road and stops. He parks the car, unbuckles his seat belt, and gets out of the car. Shutting the door with a yank, he walks around to me, and opens the car's door. My heart races as he unbuckles my seat belt too and pulls me out of the car. My pulse quickens and my breath hitches in my throat, as he shuts the door roughly, pinning me against the car door. “What do you think of yourself, Miss Dubois? Why did you go there? What were you thinking of doing? You wanted to patch up with him. Huh? How can you love a guy like him?” he growls, his chest heaving by taking rapid breaths.
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Only Regrets Epilogue 2
The next day, overwhelmed by the realization that the boy from Corsica is actually Ethan, I decide to leave Sofia. I head to Corsica, hoping to relive the feelings and memories from my childhood, to see if they can help me understand the emotions that have been haunting me.The waves gently lap at the shore as I sit alone on the familiar sand of Ajaccio Beach, the place where our story began. The sun is setting, casting the sky in a warm, orange glow, but all I can feel is the cold emptiness in my heart, all I feel is the heavy weight of unanswered questions pressing down on me.I close my eyes, and in my mind, I can see Ethan sitting beside me, just like we used to. I lean my head on his shoulder, feeling the familiar comfort of his presence, even if it’s only in my imagination.“Why, Ethan?” I whisper, my voice trembling with the ache in my heart. “Why did you leave me waiting all these years? Why didn’t you come back for me?”Tears spill over, sliding down my cheeks as I continue,
Only Regrets Epilogue 1
I fold the letter and slip it into an envelope, carefully writing ‘A Letter I'll Never Give to Ethan’ on the front. I place the envelope in the book Beauty and the Beast, alongside the first rose Ethan gave me, the one I have pressed between the pages. With a deep sigh, I shut the book, trying to push away the lingering sadness.Just then, my phone rings. I answer, and my heart skips a beat when I hear it's a modeling contract offer.“Hello, Belle?” a voice on the other end says. “We’re thrilled to inform you that your first major modeling contract has been finalized. You’ll be featured on a billboard in Paris.”My eyes widen in disbelief. Paris—the city where fashion dreams come true—is where my face will be showcased. The excitement and pride swell inside me as I thank the caller and hang up, my mind racing with the reality of this incredible milestone.As soon as I hang up, tears well up in my eyes. This is my first major contract, a clear sign that my hard work is paying off. Over
Only Regrets Chapter 102
Ethan looks more grown-up now. If I'm twenty, he might be twenty one, I guess. He looks more like a man than the teenage boy I remember. He still has that same cold, intense look in his dark brown eyes and his jaw remains tight, just like before. But now, these expressions are framed by a more mature face. Seeing Ethan taking slow, deliberate steps toward me, my heart begins to pound so hard that I can hear it echoing in my ears. Everything around us fades away, leaving just the two of us, lost in each other’s gaze. I can’t move, can’t think—only feel the magnetic pull between us growing stronger with each step he takes. “Are you really here?” I whisper, as he finally reaches me, my voice trembling with disbelief.“Yes, I’m here,” he replies softly, his eyes shimmering with tears.Tears brim in my eyes as I lock my eyes with his. “I don't believe it,” I mumble. Seeing him here now feels like a dream I don’t want to wake up from. “I'm imagining you.”It has been two years since we sa
Only Regrets Chapter 101
It has been two years since I left New York City and Ethan behind. Now, at twenty, my life has changed dramatically. I’m thriving as a model, spending long days and nights on my modeling career. Photoshoots, fashion shows, and casting calls fill my calendar, leaving little room for anything else. When I'm not modeling, I'm handling my father's hotels and resorts businesses, trying to prove myself in a world that demands so much. It feels amazing, earning money by myself at this young age. In the whirlwind of responsibilities and ambitions, I've almost forgotten about love. Due to my busy schedule, I've completely let go of the idea of relationships and dating now. Two years have passed, and my shoulder-length hair—that had once been trimmed by Aiden—now falls comfortably to my mid-back. While it’s not as long as it was before, it has grown out beautifully, mirroring the changes and growth in my own life.I had been taking my medications and therapy sessions for schizophrenia as well,
Only Regrets Chapter 100
The journey back to Sofia feels like a blur. I sit in the private jet with my father, staring out the window but seeing nothing. My mind is consumed with thoughts of Ethan, the pain of our separation pricking my heart. Once we land, I retreat into the familiarity of our mansion, but it offers no comfort. Days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, yet the ache remains. I isolate myself, shutting out the world and everyone in it. My parents are frustrated with my demeanor, especially my mother, who doesn’t understand why I’ve stopped caring about everything I once loved.In the solitude of my room, time seems to stretch endlessly. I spend hours staring out the window, feeling no shift in my own heart. The walls of my room, once comforting, now feel like a cage. Every object, every corner, reminds me of Ethan, of what we had, and what I’ve lost. And Ethan's hallucinations make it even harder to forget about him. “Belle, you need to get out of this house,” my mother snaps one day from
Only Regrets Chapter 99
As graduation day approaches, the excitement that usually accompanies the end of high school is overshadowed by a deep sense of melancholy. I’ve spent the past few days packing up my belongings, preparing to leave the dorm that has been my home for these formative years. Every item I pack feels like a piece of my past being sealed away, and the act of boxing up my life brings an unexpected weight to my chest.The day arrives with its usual pomp and ceremony. The campus is filled with graduates in their caps and gowns, the air buzzing with a mix of excitement and nostalgia. The graduation ceremony itself is a blur of speeches and applause. I’m called up to receive my diploma, a moment that should have been filled with pride and joy. Instead, it’s tinged with sadness, as I feel the weight of everything that has happened. The graduation ceremony is also the final chance to see everyone before we all go our separate ways. Friends and acquaintances gather for one last hurrah. The atmosphe
Only Regrets Chapter 98
I push open the heavy wooden doors of the church, the familiar creak echoing softly through the quiet space. I walk down the aisle, my footsteps muted by the worn carpet, and make my way to my usual spot—a solitary pew in the corner.The church is dimly lit, shimmering with a soft glow from the candles flickering by the altar. I sit down, feeling the weight of my heart pressing heavily on my chest. I bow my head, folding my hands in my lap, and let out a shuddering breath."God, it’s me again," I whisper, my voice trembling with emotion. "I’m not sure how to start this conversation. I don’t even know where to begin."I close my eyes, trying to steady my racing thoughts. Ethan’s face flashes in my mind, and my tears begin to fall, tracing hot lines down my cheeks."I don’t understand why things had to end this way. I wanted so much more. I thought we had a chance, a real chance to be happy together."I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm inside me."He said he loved me, but I
Only Regrets Chapter 97
Ethan comes running behind me, asking me to stop for a second. As I keep on walking on the road, my vision blurs by the car headlights. I'm too lost in my thoughts to notice the car speeding towards me. Suddenly, I feel a strong hand grab my arm, pulling me back just in time."Belle, what the hell are you doing?" Ethan yells, his voice filled with panic and anger.I can hardly breathe, my heart pounding from the close call. I look up at him, and his eyes are filled with a mixture of relief and fury. My mind feels like it’s spinning, and I can’t tell what’s real or just a trick of my mind. Everything around me seems to blur, and I feel disconnected from my own thoughts. It’s like I’m trapped in a fog, struggling to understand what’s happening.I'm just done with my life. The schizophrenia makes it hard to define for me what's real or what's hallucination. I've literally gone mad. It would be better if I would have bumped into that car. Why did he pull me back?“Why the hell are you he
Only Regrets Chapter 96
As he kisses and touches me, his hands roam possessively over my body. I gasp, feeling overwhelmed and exposed.“Ethan, it's enough,” I whisper against his lips.“No, it's not. I want more of you, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice raw with desire. "What if someone enters and sees me like this?" I ask, my voice trembling with a mix of fear and desire. “I don't want anyone else seeing me in this semi nude form.”“You’re mine, Belle,” he murmurs, his voice low and possessive. “Every part of you is mine, and only mine. If anyone else dares to see what’s meant for me alone, I’ll make sure they regret it.”He looks at me with a fierce, possessive glare. "If anyone dares to see you like this," he growls, his voice dripping with intensity, "I'II make that person blind. No one can dare to take a glimpse of your naked form until I'm breathing. No one means no one.”Hearing Ethan's words, my heart pounds in my chest. The intensity in his voice, the fierce protectiveness in his eyes—it sends a
