40. Unexpected encounters

Mia Miller

I think more painful than loving someone and having it go wrong is liking someone and knowing, deep down, that it will never work. This was the suffocating feeling that surrounded me every time I looked at Ethan. He was in all my thoughts, every second of my day. Ethan was the first thought when I woke up, and the last when my head touched the pillow at night. Even though everything in me screamed to stay away, to protect myself from a feeling with no future, I couldn’t. He was a jerk, selfish, and yet, irresistibly a part of me.

How did I let this happen? At first, it was supposed to be just one night. A damn night. Nothing more. I went into his arms seeking comfort, trying to escape the pain caused by Collin’s betrayal. But somehow, everything turned into this—a tangle of complicated emotions, a confusion of desires and resentments. Now, I was trapped, connected to him in a way I could never undo.

My gaze shifted to Lorenzo, playfully messing with his toys on the floor. The sunlight lit up his hair, making it shine in golden tones. He was the spitting image of Ethan. The same eyes, the same mischievous smile. Every time I looked at Lorenzo, it was like Ethan was there, always present, even when he wasn’t.

I sighed, feeling the weight of reality crushing my chest. This was what my father always warned me about. "Mia, no matter the situation, never forget that you’re strong." His voice echoed in my mind, and I wanted to believe those words. He always knew life would bring me challenges, but did he ever imagine I’d face something like this? In love with a man who would never truly be mine. I was the mother of his child, but I’d never be his wife. And now, with this damn marriage to Amber, everything seemed even more impossible.

I remembered Collin’s betrayal like it was yesterday. The feeling of being shattered, of having my heart stomped on by someone I trusted. I thought that was the worst pain I could feel. But now, here, looking at Lorenzo and thinking of Ethan, I realized that the real suffering wasn’t having my heart broken once. It was knowing that, no matter what, he would never truly be mine.

That was what hurt the most. Ethan was committed to a life I wasn’t a part of, even though, in some way, we were a family because of Lorenzo. But it was an illusion. The pain of being so close to him, feeling that spark every time our eyes met, and at the same time knowing he would be the alpha of another woman, was unbearable. Amber would be his Luna. And me? What was left for me? Just this bitter feeling of wanting something that would never be mine.

“I am strong,” I murmured to myself, echoing my father’s words. But in that moment, it was hard to believe that.

“Darling, you look awful,” Esther exclaimed as she entered the room holding a hairbrush.

“I didn’t sleep well,” I murmured. “Did your brother say anything to you?”

“No,” she mumbled. “What could he say?”

“Nothing.”

“You two are strange,” she whispered, looking at herself in the mirror.

“What do you mean strange?”

“You like each other, Mia. My brother doesn’t usually feel that way about anyone; it’s in his alpha nature.”

“Ethan doesn’t like me.” My eyes closed automatically as I breathed in the fresh air.

Esther was right. I liked him, more than I could admit to myself. And admitting it was hard.

“I’m going to the mall,” she looked at me. “Would you like to come with me?”

I confess I did. I couldn’t stand being suffocated in this forest, or reserve, or whatever. If I didn’t go to the city, I would lose my mind.

“I don’t have anyone to leave Lorenzo with.”

“We can take him, Mia. Ethan’s driver will take me. Come on!” She exclaimed cheerfully. “I want to buy some things for my nephew.”

I nodded and quickly got ready. I picked up Lorenzo and we headed toward the car.

When we got outside, I came face to face with Amber. Her gaze showed victory, having gotten what she wanted. But that was fine; I couldn’t demand anything, nor feel anything. Ethan and I were never a couple, we just had a child together.

“I hate that wolf,” Esther looked Amber up and down.

While we were in the car, I stared out the window, lost in thought. My body ached, and my head did too. I wanted to stop thinking; about my supposed father, Ethan’s marriage, my future, my son. Everything.

“I don’t know if Ethan will like that we left,” I said, turning to face the trees.

“We’re safe,” Esther affirmed. “They won’t try anything against us; there are bodyguards around us always.”

I nodded. After Lorenzo’s kidnapping, I couldn’t live peacefully anymore. Every sudden movement, every stop, made my heart tremble with fear.

When we got out of the car with Lorenzo in my arms, I felt exhausted. Esther, always carefree, was already a few steps ahead, adjusting her bag and checking the surroundings like a good wolf would. Meanwhile, I felt my body heavy; each step was a reminder of the pain I carried, the confusion in my mind, the uncertain future.

“Let’s go, Mia, you can do it,” I murmured to myself as I adjusted Lorenzo in my arms and followed Esther toward the mall entrance. I wasn’t excited at all. In fact, I hated being there. But something inside me knew I needed to break free from this cycle of pain and bitterness. Maybe, if I forced myself to live a normal life for a few hours, things would start to fall into place.

The sparkle of the storefronts, people walking back and forth, the laughter and casual conversations around me, only made me realize how far I was from this normality. While Esther got distracted in a clothing store, looking for something for herself, I wandered slowly, aimlessly, just trying to disconnect from my own thoughts. What I didn’t realize was that, as I hurriedly turned a corner, I bumped into someone.

The impact made me stumble, but I quickly regained my balance, ready to apologize. Then, when I lifted my gaze, my stomach dropped. My heart stopped for a second. Before me stood Fallon.

My former best friend.

The woman I had caught with my fiancé, Collin, two years ago. The woman who destroyed the last bit of trust and love I had for anyone. Right there, where it all began.

She looked at me in surprise, but her expression quickly shifted to something I couldn’t identify. Guilt? Disdain? It didn’t matter. What mattered was that she was here, in front of me, as if nothing had happened.

“Mia...” Fallon murmured, looking at Lorenzo.

She seemed hesitant, as if trying to figure out what to say, what to do. I, on the other hand, felt a lump rise in my throat. All the bitterness, all the hurt I thought I had buried came flooding back. Lorenzo, unaware of what was going on, squirmed in my arms, pulling my hair as he always did. That brought me back to the present moment.

“Fallon,” I responded, my voice firm, but internally a whirlwind of emotions was about to explode. It was strange to see her there, in the middle of a situation that should have been simple, a day of shopping, an attempt at normalcy, but now it was turning into anything but.

She took a step toward me, as if wanting to explain herself, but I wouldn’t let her. Not here. Not now. I straightened up, trying to appear stronger than I felt.

“I have nothing to say to you,” I said, making it clear I wanted to end the conversation right there.

Fallon hesitated, but something in her expression suggested she knew she had lost any right to approach me. The betrayal was still too fresh. Without another word, I turned my back, walking quickly back to where Esther was, feeling Fallon’s gaze burning into my back.

My head was spinning with all the memories that unexpected encounter had brought back. The pain of Collin’s betrayal, the anger of being deceived by someone I trusted with all my heart. And now, here I was, with another man at the center of my life, but this time... it was different. The pain was different, deeper, more complex. Because now, I had Lorenzo. And somehow, Ethan had rooted himself in me in a way I didn’t know how to undo.

When I met Esther again, she immediately noticed something was wrong.

“What happened?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.

“Nothing,” I replied, my voice weaker than I would have liked.

Esther grimaced. “Is everything okay? Do you want to go back home?” she suggested, already ready to leave.

“No, darling,” I said, forcing a weak smile and taking a deep breath. “Because, despite everything, I knew I couldn’t keep living in the past. Fallon, Collin... all of that was part of another life. A life I was desperately trying to leave behind."