MINO ALEXANDER ILLUSTRE

WARNING: 18+ content

MINO'S P.O.V

PAK!

I will never ever forget that day when my Mom slapped me for the first time. I quickly closed my fist due to shock and sudden burst of anger. Bakit galit na galit ka Mom? Wala naman akong ginagawang masama.

"Oh my God Mino! Babe, are you alright?" nag-aalalang sabi ng aking kasintahan at agad niyang hinawakan ang pisnge ko na namumula sa lakas ng pagkakasampal ni Mommy. Bakas sa kanya ang pagkagulat at takot sa naging reaksyon ni Mom nang ipakilala ko na siya kay Mom.

Hinawakan ko kaagad nang mahigpit ang kaniyang mga kamay upang iparamdam sa kaniya na ayos lamang ang lahat. I was about to tell her that I am alright pero bigla siyang hinawi ni Mommy palayo sakin. Mom? Why are you so mad?

"Move away from my son!" madiin at marahas nitong sigaw kay Faith. Agad na pumagitna sa amin si Mommy upang masiguro niya na may distansya sa pagitan namin. Earlier, I was so happy and excited to finally introduce my girlfriend Faith to my Mom. Pareho pa kaming nagbihis nang maayos at bumili ng mga regalo para sa kaniya. This should be a happy moment dahil ito ang unang beses kong magdala at magpakilala ng babae sa aming mansyon. Yet, what was happening now is quite the opposite. Hindi ko alam bakit ganito na lamang ang galit ni Mommy.

"Mom? Why are you so mad?" nagtatakang tanong ko sa kaniya. Hindi ko na din naiwasan na magtaas ng boses. Agad na nanlilisik na tumingin sa akin si Mommy. Never ever in my life na tinignan niya ako nang ganito. Her eyes are full of love when she is looking at me unlike now na para siyang kakain ng tao.

"Pinayagan ba kitang makipag-girlfriend? Huh? Alexander?" ma-awtoridad nitong tanong sa akin na may halong pagka-irita. Damn! Whenever my Mom calls me using my second name ibig sabihin lang noon ay talagang galit na siya at hindi nagbibiro. Pero bakit? Kakahakbang pa lamang namin sa pintuan at kakapakilala kay Faith pero literal na sinampal ako ni Mommy ng galit niya.

"But Maam-" agad  na sabat sa kaniya ni Faith upang mangatwiran. 

"Shut up! Leave this instance! Layuan mo ang anak ko!" agad na pagputol ni Mommy sa dapat na kaniyang sasabihin. Agad akong nakaramdam ng hiya para kay Faith dahil hindi naman ganito ang Mommy ko. This is the first time that she is like that.

I noticed how Faith turned pale and trembled dahil sa biglang pagsigaw sa kaniya ni Mommy. No! Baby! Please don't cry. Matindi ang pagnanais ko na lumapit sa kaniya at pigilan ang mga nagbabadya niyang luha pero nakapagitan sa amin si Mommy. Why Mom? Hindi ganito ang ugali mo, I know you Mom. Mas prefer mo na makipag-usap nang mahinahon kaysa ang makipag-away but what is with this behavior? Bakit parang takot na takot ka?

That night ended up with me and Faith breaking up. She told me that she can't stand my mother's attitude. It is better according to her to move away from me dahil hindi biro ang trauma niya sa nangyari. It is her first time na masigawan at makasaksi nang pananakit.

And that is one out of many times na marami ang nakipaghiwalay sa akin dahil kay Mommy. I hid my other relationships pero sa tuwing nalalaman niya iyon ay agad siyang gumagawa ng paraan upang maghiwalay kami nang kung sino man ang kasintahan ko noon.

Out of all those relationships, ako ang parating hinihiwalayan. I always tell them na kaya ko sila ipaglaban, na kaya kong tiisin ang galit ni Mommy para lang mag-stay sila. But in the end, lahat sila pare-pareho ang kinahihinatnan. They always leave me  and I was left alone na hindi ko pa din alam kung bakit ganoon na lang kung maghigpit si Mommy.

As time goes by, anger had consumed my heart. Nagtanim ako ng sama ng loob kay Mommy. Bakit ganoon na lang palagi ang reaksyon at ginagawa niya. Gusto niya ba na walang babae ang maaaring manatili at magmahal sa akin?

Andoon ang tampo, poot at hinanakit but still I love my Mom. She is the sweetest ngunit iba na kapag may babae nang papasok sa buhay ko. It is like she is keeping me pure and preserve for someone. Minsan na din sumagi sa isip ko na what if naka-arrange marriage na ako kaya ganyan na lamang ang pagtutol ni Mommy kapag may karelasyon akong iba. The idea of fix marriage always sickens me. It is like you are not respecting the freedom of a person. You are not letting a person be free who to love and spend his life with.

Para sa akin ay nagmumukhang hawak ng iba ang buhay ko and it makes me feel like a puppet, some sort of a remote controlled robot. And if that idea of mine is true, I swear to God na tututol ako kahit pa gaano ko kamahal ang mga magulang ko. Kalayaan ko ang piliin ang mamahalin and no one can control or dictate me.

Taon ang lumipas na wala akong natanggap na kahit anong paliwanag kahit na pilitin ko ding magtanong. I grew tired and hopeless to get an answer and because of that ay lalo akong nagrebelde kay Mommy. I had secret girlfriends na minsan ay pinagsasabay ko pa. It is because hindi ko na din nais pang magseryoso.

Why do I will bother to do that? IIwan lang din naman ako the moment that my Mom will be involve in the picture. Nagsawa na akong magmahal nang totoo and in the end I was the one who begged them to not let me go pero takot sila kay Mommy. I was left alone again and again. Nawalan na ako ng gana. Everything is just a game, foreplay and a way to release pleasure.

If ever Mom is preserving me for someone at sa kung ano pa mang bagay o dahilan ay hindi ko na pinigil ang sarili ko. I had lots and lots of one night stands, making out and playful dates. I enjoyed myself damn much. Girls became addicted with my body because they tend to beg me to stay and do another round when I am in the peak of leaving them naked on the bed. Doon ko lang nararamdaman na hindi ako ang naghahabol at nagmamakaawa na manatili sila sakin.

I smiled bitterly at them and sometimes due to being drowned with pleasure hindi ko na alam ang pakiramdam nang magmahal and I think it is good. Kung wala lang din naman makatagal sakin whenever they face my Mom then I will just enjoy myself.

"Hmmm... Baby... more please," she said to me na tila ba nababaliw. Agad kong siniil ng halik ang babaeng kanaig ko ngayon. She intensely clawed my back while I was exploring the inside of her mouth using my tongue. I slowly moved my left hand and started to caress her breast. She quickly released a smooth moan to let me know that she is enjoying it.

I gently break the kiss and started planting kisses with soft bites on her neck. She smells good actually and I like that for a girl. I am picky when it comes to smell. Caressing her chest with pieces of clothing is not enough for me. I quickly entered my hands on his blouse and the moment my palm landed on the skin of her soft breast she quickly grabbed my belt and aggressively unbuckles it while I am still enjoying how soft and big her breast is while playing with her nipple.

"Gentle baby," I playfully said dahil hindi na siya magkanda-ugaga sa pagkalas ng sinturon na suot ko. But she became deaf because she is getting hot and wet. Agad kong inalis ang kamay ko na nasa ilalim na ng kaniyang blouse at agad kong pinigil ang kamay niya na hirap na hirap pa din sa pagtanggal ng aking sinturon. I saw how she looked surprised and disappointed dahil siguro sa iniisip niya na hindi ko na itutuloy ang gagawin namin.

"Why? What's the problem?" medyo irritable niyang tanong sa akin. She quickly positioned herself and sat on the bed na kanina pa namin pinapainit. These kind of foreplay are not exciting for me anymore. Hindi man lang ako nakakaramdam ng desire and I guess this kind of thing became flavorless for me also. But andito na siya eh and I will not do anything tonight so I guess let the play of fire continue.

"I-" she was about to say something but I quickly held her waist and pulled her closer and I instantly crashed my lips to hers. At first she was shocked but she responded aggressively. I can feel that she was on fire again. Our movements are quick and I am on top of her once more.

One. Two. Three.

I am counting the buttons of her blouse that I am unbuttoning while our kiss continued. She became more and more aggressive na siya ko na ring sinasabayan. Our tongue started a battle that was fueled with fire and lust.

Four.

Upon unbuttoning the last one I moved away from her lips para matanggal na ang sagabal na blouse na ito. Hindi na niya inantay na ako pa ang magtanggal. She removed the blouse quickly and she grabbed my neck and lowered both of us again to completely lay our body on top of the bed. I moved my hands on her back and unbuckle the locks of her bra. Hinayaan ko muna na maluwag lamang ito and then I removed my hands from her back. I kissed her again dahil nabitin ang dila ko sa pakikipag-espadahan.

"Pareho tayo ng karamdaman".

"Wag kang mag-alala! Gagaling din tayo".

What the fuck?

Agad akong napalayo and our kiss break na siya namang ikinagulat niya. Agad akong napatayo mula sa pagkakapatong sa kaniya.

What the hell was that? Bakit bigla na lamang akong nakakarinig ng boses? Agad akong nagpalinga-linga sa medyo may kadilimang silid. Where is that voice coming from? I am not mistaking dahil nakarinig talaga ako ng boses ng isang batang babae. I tried to calm myself but I am feeling some goose bumps.

"Baby? What is happening?" nagtataka niyang tanong but I can't barely focus. The sound of that voice is still echoing somewhere.

"Isa kang halimaw! Your eyes! Nagbabago sila ng kulay! You're a monster! Monster!".

Lalo akong kinilabutan when I realize that it is my own voice. I am not mistaking because that is me when I am younger. What the hell is happening? Hindi ko maigalaw ang buo kong katawan because of confusion. Am I going crazy?

"Mino, Baby-" she was about to utter some words but all of the sudden when I looked at her ay bigla na lamang siyang nawalan ng malay. Kasabay nito ay ang pakiramdam ko na parang bumababa ang temperatura ng kwarto. What the hell? I slowly felt cold. Hindi ko alam ngunit tila nais na ding pumikit ng aking mga mata. I am afraid about this sudden abnormality hindi ako pwede magpatangay sa nararamdaman ko na biglang pagkaantok.

Pilit kong iminumulat ang aking mga mata but they are betraying me. I felt my body having the urge to collapsed haggang sa naramdaman ko na lamang ang lamig ng sahig. Before I closed my eyes ay nakita ko pa ang malabong imahe ng isang tao na nakatayo sa tapat ng bintana.

Who are you? I am not able to utter that question as sleepiness had successfully invaded my system.