Chapter 2 (Freedom)

Chapter 2

Astherielle's POV

"It's just right, Asthe, what you did! It's just right because to be honest, I don't know how to take care of you anymore! Every day, it's a struggle to figure out what to do with you! It's probably better if you leave so that I can just think about myself! Being a mother is exhausting! I just can't tell you that because you still have some use to me! You're helpful in small ways! But I can manage without you! I can live on my own without constantly thinking about you!" she turned to Aunt Mavic and with a sigh said, "Alright, Mavic, take her and leave my house!"

The day for my release from the rehabilitation hospital after two years of treatment has arrived, but I didn't expect to still hear my mother's last words like that. It was as if I was being squeezed alive while bravely and tearfully hearing them. I know I hurt her, but I also know that I helped her. She won't have to worry about me anymore...

I wiped away my tears and just looked out the window with a forced smile. The days and nights had changed so quickly. I didn't realize that I was about to leave this facility soon.

During my two years of stay here, I forgot about the privileges outside. I focused on healing. Psychotherapy helped me a lot. It is also called "talk therapy". The doctors here helped me find my identity. They gradually taught me how to change my troubling emotions, thoughts, and behavior. The staff here are kind and positive, so the return on investment for patients like me is excellent.

After my session, I immediately returned to my room to rest. It helped me a lot that I didn't see or interact with anyone else except the staff here. I proved that my decision to follow Tita Mavic was right. I was put in a place where I could heal safely.

She only visits me once a month, as that is the hospital policy. So when she does visit, she showers me with presents.

I talked to her last night and she congratulated me on this day. She will come to pick me up later. Yes, I will live with her in her house in Placio Carmen in Rizal. Her boyfriend already flew to the Netherlands six months ago. She wasn't ready to go abroad yet, so she stayed here temporarily. But she also told me about her plan to follow her boyfriend soon.

Somehow, my sadness was lifted as I remembered it. I always feel sad and cry whenever I remember my mom. I wish she were here with me now... We could have healed together and gone out together if she had agreed to come with me here. Instead of fighting for me with Tita Mavic, she even scolded me for it.

I know that's what would have happened, but why do I still feel regret and pain every time I think about it? She's still my mother, no matter what. I still love her so much and I hope she'll get better.

I dried my tears and composed myself. For now, preparing for my life outside is my top priority.

"Is your aunt still not here, Asthe?"

I turned around when I heard the voice of Doctor Vic, a fifty-year-old psychiatric doctor and one of the senior doctors here in the hospital. He's one of the doctors who has been treating me here.

"Hello, Doc... Good morning... No, she's not here yet. Maybe she's on the way... She's the one who's going to drive her car, so..."

I don't have a cellphone so I can't contact her. It's not allowed to use them here. I call her on the hospital's landline, so I used to talk to her.

"Oh... I see... She'll be there soon... Have you prepared your things?"

He greeted me early during our last session and praised the improvements I've made during my stay in their hospital. They were happy about my upcoming discharge, and it made me feel content and happy about leaving.

"Yes, doc', I don't have anything left to pack," I replied, looking at the two suitcases on my bed. "Thank you so much for believing in me that I'll recover. I won't forget all of you here."

He smiled and raised his eyebrows. "That's our job, Asthe. It's a job we do with our hearts for the patients who rely on our services. And if you recovered, it's because of you being cooperative with us. You really wanted to get better, so you deserve everything you have now. Again, congratulations, and we are so happy for you."

"Thank you so much, doc'."

He looked at the clipboard he was holding, probably my record of dismissal.

"I heard that you will continue your studies in a regular school. How true is that, hija?"

"Oh," I said shyly. I only told my Aunt about that plan, but I guess the news reached him too.

I was hesitant to tell them because I wasn't sure if it was the right time to expose myself to the public, even though I knew I was already doing better. But I guess it was okay based on his reaction.

"It's good that you decided on that, hija. We're happy that you'll continue your studies as a normal child and student."

I juggled staying here with my studies. It's hard to do, but I did it for my mom. I don't want to fail in my studies too. I am being sent modules that I have to answer. With the help of my adviser, I am able to answer them correctly. It's better to learn little by little than not at all.

"Um... I'm just planning to... I haven't experienced going to school yet... I've been homeschooled since kindergarten... It served a purpose because of what happened to me... Now, I want to see if I can make a difference in my world... I'm excited to live in the normal world..."

"The world deserves you, Astherielle... Good luck on your journey... I don't see any negative effect in your plan... It might even help you exercise your new self... Just trust yourself. Always be careful in the world. Keep yourself safe from your surroundings. Keep in mind everything you learned here and all the things we told you..."

"Yes, doc'... My heart feels relieved. I thought I couldn't interact with other people yet..."

She laughed softly. "You said you couldn't? That's why this hospital became your home for two years to make your dreams possible when you leave..."

I felt an unusual joy from what she said. A doctor just said that I am now free to do things that were impossible for me before.

"It feels so good to hear all of that from you... I will be forever grateful, doc'..."

After an hour of waiting, Tita Mavic finally arrived with flowers and other things.

"Oh, Astherielle, the wait is over, hija!" She greeted me happily.

She hugged me tightly before giving me the bouquet. There were different kinds of flowers arranged in it, making it beautiful, colorful, and fragrant.

"Look, nothing is impossible as long as you persevere... This is the fruit of your decisions... You're really great now, hija..."

I was overwhelmed with happiness that my tears didn't fall. I didn't know what I did to deserve such a kind aunt.

"Thank you so much, Tita... You never gave up on me... You all spent so much on me for my recovery..."

"No... Not just me, hija..."

I bit my lip nervously. Was there someone else who helped me aside from her?

"Your father... He also had a big contribution to your recovery, hija... When he found out about your condition, he paid for all the expenses for your treatment... Sorry if I didn't tell you before... I didn't want you to think about it... Your father also asked me not to tell you yet... I heard from him that you're now okay..."

I waited for her to continue, but there was nothing more. So, he didn't reply anymore after finding out I was okay. Until now, he still doesn't plan on introducing himself to me personally. I understand him, though.

"Please tell him that I am grateful to him... I was surprised... At least, he didn't abandon me..."

Tita smiled and didn't speak for a while.

"You're his child, Astherielle, no matter how he flips the world... He loves you. I'm sure of that... He wouldn't offer his help if he didn't..."

"Yes, Auntie... I still owe my life to him... That won't change no matter what I do..."

I didn't prolong that conversation. I was uncomfortable discussing my father.

"Astherielle, look to your side... We're passing by the school you'll be studying in!" Auntie exclaimed excitedly.

Reluctantly, I looked to where she was pointing. She slowed down the car so I could get a better view. It was a long university in Quezon City, and we were passing by what I assumed to be the main entrance because of its grand view, the number of people entering, and the large gold letters displayed in front of the gate.

"Oh, well... Auntie, it looks expensive... It's okay for me to continue studying in a public school..."

"Oh, Astherielle, that's not possible... Alright, I'll tell you now... You were actually enrolled there before... They covered the homeschooling that was applied to you..."

"Oh... Really?"

"Yes... I paid for advanced lessons so you wouldn't fall behind in your studies. Good thing you're doing your best too... You'll be entering your third year of college this year..."

That's why I was surprised at the exams and activities that were assigned to me; they were extremely difficult. Maybe Auntie didn't tell me to avoid pressuring me. I'm taking up Biochemistry, which focuses more on laboratory work and math problems. I'm sent learning videos to help me understand some of the experiments that I don't witness and learn in person.

"It's true that tuition at Polaris University is expensive, but it's worth it because the teachers are excellent... I won't regret investing my money there if it's for your future, hija... Plus, your father left us a lot of money. I just add it to your tuition fund..."

"Polaris University..."

"Yeah... You heard it right, hija... That's where your father and I studied in college."

She told me before that they were only two siblings. After her college graduation, their parents passed away one after the other due to an illness they contracted. That's why she really looked for me; aside from her brother, I was their closest relative, the closest to their blood. My father had his own life and couldn't always accompany Auntie.

"Your father was a scientist... You and he were alike... You both love science..."

That's when I found out my father's true profession, and it surprised me.

"Sorry if I'm only telling you now... I was really happy when I found out that you're taking up Biochemistry... Since our parents sent us to good schools, I want the same for you... You'll study there, Astherielle..."

She accelerated the car again. I took one last glance at the university before turning to her.

Is it normal for me to feel this nervous? In a few days, I'll finally be entering a real school! I'm both nervous and excited!

"You can do it, hija... I'll always check up on you... And I'll still guide you until you get used to it..."

I held onto her promise. "Thank you so much, Auntie..."

As soon as we arrived at her house, she immediately brought me to my room. I smiled upon seeing my school supplies ready, such as my bag, notebooks, pens, and more. I'm going to be a normal student now!

End of Astherielle's POV