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Chapter 4 - Rawls
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2024-10-19 08:06:44Having Claire sitting here in my pajama top is better than anything than I could ever dream of. I know on the surface this is wrong for me to do. I have feelings for her. These feelings are not just physical. There is something about her that just draws me into her. She is the flame and I am the moth.
I know that she is Evie’s best friend. I feel like a dirty old man for having feelings for a girl - correct that woman so much younger than I am. Tonight when she called me because she was in trouble, I felt something inside of me I have not felt in a very long time. I have not felt needed in a long time. I love my daughter but ever since she was sixteen the only thing she needed from me was my wallet. Now sitting here in the kitchen with her wearing my shirt and sipping her hot chocolate, I feel a need to protect her. To care for her. The fact she is in trouble does not make it better. I know I should walk away. She is too young. She has a life. I am an older man. She deserves someone her own age. As I am talking to myself and trying to convince myself to do the right thing, my hand finds her arm and I begin to rub it. I am not doing this for her. I am doing this for me. I have been lonely for far too long. I miss the feeling of having a real connection with someone. Someone that I can hold in my arms and just cuddle with. I feel her hand reach over and she takes my hand. The feeling of her soft skin on mine sends a tingle through me. A feeling of longing I have not had in a long time. As I look at her she looks back at me. I see something in her eyes I have not seen in a very long time. It is a sparkle. This is a sparkle of need and desire. It is something that no words could describe. I feel her other hand touch my cheek. I am lost. I have to have this woman. But I need to resist these feelings. I cannot bear to hurt her or betray her parents. I am supposed to protect her like she is my own daughter just like Robert and Mary would look after Evie. I take her hand to remove it from my cheek. There is a jolt of electricity that shoots to my heart and my cock. If she stays here much longer I don’t know if I have the strength to not make love to her. “Claire, your clothes must be dry by now. I should be getting you home before your parents start to worry.” I think I see disappointment in her eyes. There is no way that she could want the same thing that I do. I cannot even hope that can be true. “I guess you are right, Mr. — I mean Rawls. I don’t want my parents to worry and I have worn out my welcome tonight. Just let me know what I owe you for the tow truck and I will pay you and soon as I can.” She would not even look my way as she walked towards the laundry room. I think o hurt her feelings and I never want to cause her pain. When she returned back to the kitchen she was dressed. She still would not look at me. I stood in front of her and lifted her chin so she would look at me. I could see mushed tears in her eyes. That broke my heart into pieces. “Claire, what’s wrong?” She turned away from me again. “Nothing is wrong. I had a long day at work and then with everything that happened with the car, I am just exhausted. I will walk to my house, I don’t want to be a bother.” Before I could stop her, she darted out of the door and was running towards her house. I wanted to run after her, but I could see that her parents were home. I know deep down that I have to fight how I feel about Claire, but I am not sure that’s possible. Being so close to her has made my heart start beating again. I have not felt this way since Fiona passed away. I needed to figure this out one way or another.Related chapters
My Life Long Crush Chapter 5 - Claire
I know that running out of the house the way I did was childish, but I just had to get away. I wanted Rawls so much, but I was so scared at the same time. I had dreamed of being alone with him, but I was not prepared for how it made me feel. I know that he had to see that my cheeks were red. I could feel the heat rising in my face the closer we moved towards each other. I wanted so badly for Rawls to kiss me. I had wanted that for so long. But after how quickly he tried to remove my hand from his cheek, I knew then that this was just a stupid crush. There was no way a man like Rawls would ever want me, romantically or intimately. I was foolish to think I could be anymore to him than Evie’s best friend. Thankfully, when I walked into the house, mom and dad had already gone to bed. My mom would know something was wrong as soon as she looked at me. I held back my tears as long as I could, but they started falling as soon as I started towards my house. I eased open the back door and we
Last Updated : 2024-11-21My Life Long Crush Chapter 6 - Rawls
It has been a few days since I have seen Claire. I have not even seen her sitting in her bedroom window when I get home after work. I know that I have hurt her, and I have not been able to sleep since the other night. Seeing those tears in her eyes felt like a punch in the stomach. I never want to hurt Claire. I want to protect her and let her know how I feel about her. Unfortunately, what I want and what is best for Claire is for me to fight those feelings. I know that I was sacrificing what happiness I could find with Claire, but there were too many people that would get hurt if I pursued a relationship with her. As I was driving home from work, my mind is racing with thoughts of Claire. Her bright blue eyes and warm smile has haunted his every waking moment since our night together. I was just going to have to find an excused to walk over to her house. I needed to check on her or I would never be able to sleep again. It was almost like I could feel the pain she was feeling, and I
Last Updated : 2024-12-01My Life Long Crush Chapter 7 – Claire and Rawls
. Mary was the first to speak that broke the tension. "So, Claire, tell us about your day. You have been working such long hours lately and we haven't been able to catch up." I could see that Claire really did not want to say a word, because she was just picking at her dinner. I needed to figure out a way to get her by herself to see how she is and try to explain how I am feeling as well. "It was the same old stuff. Just work." I did not even look up from my plate, because I could not look into Rawls’ eyes. I know that the only thing I would see there was pity. He had to see me as some love sick puppy. Her voice was strained, and the sadness in it was like a punch to my gut. She clearly did not want to be here, across from me, but the thought of her mother's interrogation was probably worse. I completely understood. If I were in her shoes, I would want to avoid the topic of my love life too, especially if it was a sore spot for me. After dinner, Rawls offered to help clean up the
Last Updated : 2024-12-01My Life Long Crush Chapter 8 – Rawls
Days turned into weeks, and I threw myself into my work, hoping to drown out the thoughts of Claire. The late nights and early mornings became a numbing routine, a welcome distraction from the ache in my heart. But no matter how much I tried; I could not shake the feeling that I was lying to myself. Every time I drove by her house, every time I saw her car parked in her parent's driveway, I felt a longing for something that I could not have and something I should not want. One evening, my friend, David, called me with a crazy idea. "You need to get out there again, buddy," he said. "I've got this friend, Jenna, and she's interested in going out with you. I have set you up on a blind date. Trust me, you'll thank me for it." I hesitated because I did not want to be with any other woman but Claire. David was insistent and he said he would do a double date with me if that would make it easier. I know he is looking out for me, but I am not really into dating again. The night of the bli
Last Updated : 2024-12-03My Life Long Crush Chapter 9 - Claire
Her eyes searched mine, and I could see the fear and hope mingling within them. "Okay," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. "But if something goes wrong, if we get hurt..." I knew what she was saying. The thought of causing her pain was unbearable. But the allure of being with her, the love I felt, was too strong to ignore. "I know," I said, squeezing her hand gently. "But we'll deal with it together, Claire. I won't let you go through it alone." I looked into his eyes, and for a moment, I saw the man that I had known for years, the man who had fell in love with, the man who wants me the way I want him. I lean in and kiss him again, this time with a fierce urgency that takes my breath away. I slide my hands up his arms, around his neck, pulling him closer. I feel the hardness of his body pressing against mine, and all the reasons why this was a bad idea seemed to dissolve away. "Take me to your house," I whispered against his lips, my voice shaking with need. "I n
Last Updated : 2024-12-04My Life Long Crush Chapter 10 - Rawls
I could not get Claire off of my mind all night. I had a tough time going to sleep considering how hard I was when I went to bed. I could have easily just jerked off, but I was saving any sexual pleasure for the first time Claire, and I make love. No matter who she has been with before me, I will make her forget all of them. She will be screaming my name until she can barely speak. The sound of a car door slamming jolted me out of my thoughts. I froze, listening as the footsteps grew closer. It was Evie, stumbling into the house after another night out. I heard the murmur of her voice, slurred and sloppy, as she made her way to the kitchen. My stomach knotted with anxiety. Last night's kiss with Claire was still fresh on my lips, and the last thing I needed was to deal with my daughter's hangover. I knew she'd would expect breakfast, a warm cup of coffee, and likely a lecture about the dangers of partying too hard. I did not have the energy to deal with her. She was an adult, an
Last Updated : 2024-12-04My Life Long Crush Chapter 11 - Claire
I cannot believe I was almost late for work. I am always the first one in and the last one leaving. But after my night with Rawls, I slept so good. The weight of thinking I had messed up with him that night was lifted. Now what was before me was when I will get to see him again. I felt like I was about to so something wrong because we would have to sneak around. I have never lied to my parents but, I’m going to have to in order to find time to see Rawls. As I walked into the office, my heart was racing. The smell of coffee and printer ink filled my nose, and I tried to ignore the awkward glances from my colleagues. Thelma’s eyes widened when she saw me, and she immediately knew that something was up. She’s the office mom, the one who notices when someone’s wearing a new pair of shoes or when someone’s had their hair done. But she wasn’t just looking at me; she was studying me, like she could see right through my shirt to my racing heart. Her curiosity grew as I couldn’t keep the s
Last Updated : 2024-12-06My Life Long Crush Chapter 12 - Rawls
As the day progressed, I couldn't help but think about what Claire might be doing. I wonder if she is thinking about me too. Maybe she is thinking about the kiss we shared last night. Maybe she is feeling guilty. But I know she feels the same way I do. We just need to find a way to be together without ruining our friendship and our daughters' relationship. Finally, the workday ended, and I was eager to get home. The drive home felt like an eternity, my mind racing with thoughts of Claire and Evie. When I arrived, the house was eerily quiet. Evie's door was closed, and I could hear the faint sound of music coming from her room. I decided to let her be for now. As I settled into my chair in the living room, my phone pinged in my pocket. It was a text from Claire. The sight of her name on my screen was like a drug, making me need her even more. I opened the message and felt like I was a teenager getting a message from the hottest girl in town. Her words were simple, but they were l
Last Updated : 2024-12-06
Latest chapter
My Life Long Crush Chapter 74 - The Safe House
The further along Claire is in her pregnancy the more e concerned I become. No matter how much digging Robert and I have been doing, we cannot find out where Jonathan is holding Evie. We decided to not get the police involved. It may not be the best decision but some of the things were are having to do or will have to do may not be on the right side of the law. The further along Claire is in her pregnancy the more concerned I become. No matter how much digging Robert and I have been doing, we cannot find out where Jonathan is holding Evie. We decided to not get the police involved. It may not be the best decision but some of the things were are having to do or will have to do may not be on the right side of the law. "I can't sit here and do nothing," I say, pacing the room. "We need to find her." Rawls's eyes are filled with understanding, but his voice is firm. "We will, but we have to be smart about it," he says, his hand landing gently on my shoulder, trying to still my frantic
My Life Long Crush Chapter 73 - Fiona
I should have gotten Jonathan psychiatric help a long time ago. Even as a child he had issues getting along with other children. The years I was with Rawls and Evie, Jonathan had been raised with his father’s (Marco) family, the Castellanos. Marco had always talked about the strange incidents that occurred when they he was young, but he had always downplayed the seriousness of Jonathan’s behavior. Now, it all made sense. My child had turned into a monster, and we were all just pawns in his twisted game of power and control. I had to see Evie. I had to explain, to apologize for the years of pain I had caused. But would Evie even believe me? Would she recognize me as her mother or the woman who had abandoned her all those years ago? Fear and guilt had been my constant companions since I had gone into hiding, but now, with Evie's safety hanging in the balance, I was going to have to face my past. I had to see her, had to try to make this right. I approached the house where I kne
My Life Long Crush Chapter 72 - Claire
I know Rawls and Dad are keeping things from me. I can see it in their eyes every time they think I'm not looking. They hover over me like overprotective hawks, their whispers and furtive glances speaking volumes. But I'm not a child anymore. I know something's wrong, something much more than just Evie's disappearance. I sit in my room, my thoughts racing, trying to piece together the puzzle that is my life. The walls are closing in, the silence suffocating. I need to know the truth. I need to know what's happening to Evie and why my fiancé and my father are acting so strangely. Summoning my courage, I tiptoe down the hallway. The house feels eerie, as if it's holding its breath, waiting for the next shoe to drop. I hover outside the door to Rawls’ office, listening to the muffled whispers of Rawls and my dad. "We need to tell her," my dad says, his voice strained. "She has a right to know." Rawls's voice is low and firm. "Not yet. She's not ready for this." I bite my lip, my he
My Life Long Crush Chapter 71 - The last piece of the puzzle
Claire said that Thelma is good at digging up information. Hopefully she has something that can help us find Evie and rid our lives of this psychopath. Robert and I were anxious to see what Thelma had found, but I know it will help Claire if they can see each other. "Thelma," Robert said, his voice tight with urgency. "What do you have for us?" Thelma took a deep breath, her eyes flicking to me before returning to Robert. "I've been looking into Jonathan Cramer/John Castellanos's history," she began, her voice steady despite the gravity of what she was about to say. "And it turns out he has connections to Evie's mother, Fiona." "Robert and I leaned in, our eyes locked on Thelma's face as she opened the folder. She pulled out a series of photographs, each one more disturbing than the last. "These are of Jonathan with his mother," she said. "Does this woman look familiar?” Robert took the photos, his eyes scanning over them before handing them to me. The woman in the images
My Life Long Crush Chapter 70 - Rawls and Robert
Robert and I sat in my office, poring over the case files and notes we had gathered on Jonathan Cramer. The silence in the house was suffocating, compared to the chaos that had erupted earlier. The detectives were on thin ice with me. I could not believe they questioned Claire about the paternity of the baby. "How did he do it?" Robert muttered, his eyes scanning the page in front of him. "He had to have had help," I said, slamming a fist on the table. "There's no way he could have gotten through that security unnoticed." Robert nodded, his jaw set. "I've called in a favor with an old contact at the precinct," he said, his eyes never leaving the paperwork scattered in front of him. "We're getting the full report on the facility's staff—everyone who had access to Evie's location and schedule." We worked tirelessly into the night, piecing together a timeline of events, looking for any inconsistencies or signs of tampering. The more we dug, the more it became clear that this was
My Life Long Crush Chapter 69 - Jonathan and Evie
I can’t believe how easy it was to get at Evie. The security at the mental facility was no better than the security at a nursery school. I had disguised myself well enough that Evie did not recognize me. She thinks her dad sent me to pick her up for her safety. She will be anything but safe with me. I may have a little fun with her before my plan is put into place. But first things first, I need to get her to my place. She’s so naive and trusting, it’s almost too easy. I have a van waiting outside, no plates, no paperwork, no way to trace it back to me. The perfect getaway vehicle. As we walk out of the facility, my heart races. The plan is coming together perfectly. The security camera's blind spot is right where I need it to be. I glance around, making sure no one is watching. "It's okay, Evie," I say, my voice low and reassuring. "We're going to get you somewhere safe." Her eyes are wide with fear, but she nods, trusting me implicitly. She's just as innocent now as she was
My Life Long Crush Chapter 68 - Too Close to Home
Days passed, and despite the fortress we had built around ourselves, a sense of unease remained. It was as if the walls were made of paper, ready to be torn apart at any moment by the monster we knew was out there. And then, it happened. Evie went missing from the facility. "No," Claire whispered, her hand flying to her mouth. "It can't be." But it was. Evie was gone, vanished without a trace from the very place we had thought she would be safe. The facility's director looked at us with a mix of regret and urgency, his words barely penetrating the fog of dread that had descended upon us. "We're doing everything we can," he assured us, but the tremble in his voice did little to ease our fears. Robert's eyes met mine, and I knew what he was thinking. We had been so focused on keeping Claire safe, we had neglected to consider that Jonathan might come after Evie. The realization hit me like a punch to the gut. We had played right into his hands. We sprang into action, phones to our
My Life Long Crush Chapter 67 - Lockdown
The drive home from the hospital was tense. I was constantly looking in my rear view mirror. Claire's parents followed us in their car, Robert and Mary were as worried as I was about this whole situation. Once we were inside the house, there was an urgency to secure the place. Robert and I immediately began installing the state-of-the-art security system while Claire's mother hovered anxiously by her side, ensuring she was as comfortable as possible. The house felt like a fortress under siege. Every creak of the floorboards, every rustle of the curtains had us on edge. We worked into the early hours of the morning, installing cameras and alarms, setting up a panic button by Claire's bedside. Finally, the last screw was in place and the system was live. I walked into the living room, where Claire lay on the couch, her eyes heavy with exhaustion and fear. "It's done," I told her, trying to keep my voice steady. "You're safe here." Her gaze searched mine, looking for the truth in my
My Life Long Crush Chapter 66 - Rawls
Now that we know was this Jonathan person is capable of, I am going to put security on Evie as well. I trust what they have at the facility. Once I get Claire home, I am getting personal security and upgrading our alarm system. I look at Claire, who is still in a daze, and I realize that the reality of the situation is setting in for both of us. The man who attacked her is still out there, and he knows where we live. I refuse to let fear control us. I lean down and whisper reassurances into her ear. "Rawls," she whispers, her voice shaky, "What if he comes for me again? Or what if he tries to get to Evie?" The thought sends a chill down my spine, but I don't let it show. "He won't," I tell her firmly, stroking her hair. "I promise you, I'll protect you both. I won't let anything happen to either of you." Her eyes search mine, looking for the truth in my words. "You can't be with us all the time," she points out. "No," I admit, "but we're not going to make it easy for him. We
