Ashley POV I didn't know where to start. Then, remembering the list I had written and the master list Jackson had compiled from working with Boyz Hits Bullets, I took them both out and placed them on the table. "Can you look through these?" I asked. Jayden glanced at my paper first. "Is this some kind of wish list of yours, or?" he asked as he pointed at it. His gaze turned suspicious as he looked at the master list. "I don't know what the person who wrote this meant. It's just a list of events." "How do you know this is mine?" I couldn't hold back my astonishment. "Your handwriting is pretty crappy, Ash." "Oh my," I muttered. "It's gotten better over the years." "Apparently not, because... the letters look the same as always." "It's not a wish list, you know," I said, rolling my eyes at his scorn. "It's a list of things you and I have gone through over the past five years." For obvious reasons, I had intentionally not written down the day of my engagement with him, and anythi
Ashley POV So, despite being only a few steps away from the handsome face of Jayden Keller, I knew that I had to stay away. Before he or I did something really bad, something that I couldn't do or even worse, that I wouldn't be able to deny or take back. "I have to go to school," I said as I straightened my body position. My two hands were clenched at my sides and I felt my cheeks start to heat up. "I'll take care of the dishes. You rest or whatever. When I get back, we will start piecing back together the memories you've lost." "No," he said quickly, getting up from his bed. There was nothing - not even the slightest hint of redness in his expression that suggested that the moments that had just occurred, where the two of us had shown affection and intimacy. And perhaps it was best if we both forgot about it. "Let me do the dishes since you're already cooking." "Don't be silly," I said as I picked up the dishes and started washing them, still feeling the heat on my cheeks. "What
Ashley POVSchool went on like any other Tuesday. Only Eva almost pulled out her hair in the second period and had probably aged about ten years by the end of the last class. She was a gentle girl, but her dedication to Jayden's boy band could make a mother's dedication to her firstborn seem cruel by comparison. She was trying to get various information from me, getting anything from the various features I displayed surprisingly, but I didn't budge. All I could tell her was that Jayden was in a car accident but not dead, which she probably already knew. She kept trying to convince me that the two of us should meet him at the healer's, but I was used to her trying to use me to meet him. It wasn't anything aggressive, it was more often taken as a joke for me and her, but now it was as if she was really worried that day.Not that it worried me, because I knew that Jayden was fine and I knew Eva would get over her overreaction soon. Eventually. Besides, I bought her food for the rest of t
Ashley POVSomehow, I resisted the urge to breathe away, either out of relief or annoyance. My fingers felt stiff around the knife handle. Despite my instinctive feeling of wanting to punch, I wasn't too fond of violence. And, I won't lie, I was a little scared as I wandered around the house and wondered to myself if Jayden had been kidnapped or stabbed and was bleeding profusely in a corner. Luckily, he was fine.But why was he sleeping in my bed?I slowly approached him, ready to wake him up and tell him that he should eat before the cheese on his pizza got cold. The ceiling lights weren't on, leaving only the city lights below to fill the dark room. Stopping beside the bed, I was just about to turn on the wall lamp that sat above my bed when I noticed, for the first time, the dark circles under his eyes and how his skin looked too thin on his cheekbones and jaw. He had lost weight, even if it was only water weight, since the accident, and a significant amount. Whether it was due to
Ashley POVJayden looked as if he wanted to say something, maybe protest, but eventually, he decided against it and just nodded. “I'll take the couch. I don't want to be a bother to you.”“Right,” I said, glad that he didn't insist that I had to sleep in the same room as him. The same apartment, away from strangers in lab coats and nurse's outfits, in my opinion, should be enough for him to be relaxed enough to sleep.“We still have time to kill,” Jayden said, looking out over the city. “I figured you needed to study though.”“You should sleep,” I reminded him. I actually had an assignment to submit before Thursday night, which meant I had two days to complete it. “You haven't been able to rest properly until now, so take this opportunity and go to bed early.”He sighed. “I guess.”“I was thinking we could visit our usual karaoke place,” I said. “This Friday night, if you have time.”Jayden snorted. “I think I have about sixteen hours for the day.”“Good.”I grinned as I left him at t
Ashley POVJayden had already picked up his shirt and folded it on the nightstand to the left by the time I reached the door. For a moment, I let myself admire his muscular body, illuminated by the city lights. His bare arms and back arched and relaxed as he moved. His dark brown hair fell into his eyes, covering his forehead and eyebrows, and he flicked his head slightly to the side to keep his fringe from showing. His mouth was barely open as he focused on his task.And then he glanced over his shoulder, staring at me.Oh, shoot! I gasped. I hadn't meant to stare at him for long enough to get caught. Even worse, I had no clue what kind of expression I was wearing right now. Was I looking at him with awe? Sexual lust?Or even worse - affection?“I don't know how to lower the curtain,” he told me casually.“It's not that hard,” I said and pressed a button on top of the light switch, which caused a low buzz. The gray screen hidden in the wall slowly inched across the two panoramic wind
Ashley POVI finished my oatmeal quietly. Jayden didn't speak again, albeit he finally started eating his own breakfast. I got to my feet to put the bowls in the sink and pour some juice for both of us when he broke the silence.“What should I try to figure out today?”He had caught himself, his expression now neutral. I downed my juice and placed the glass in front of him. “I have no idea,” I admitted. “Since we only need a charger for your phone, which probably has a lot of information we can use...” I looked at him straight on. “I guess I could let you torture yourself some more by letting you watch YouTube.”Jayden sighed. “I guess so. I should take a look,” he told me. “I should try and see if I recognize myself.”I swallowed my first response, the one that would accuse him of being a complete idiot. But I understood him. I wouldn't want to just sit around and do nothing if I were the one with amnesia.“I'm going to wash the dishes,” I said shortly. “I might be back a little late
Ashley POV"Mother...""Oh, my gosh," I exclaimed. Is it possible that his parents decided to call just as we managed to access his cell phone?"What—" Jayden started to say as I handed him his phone. He was forced to get closer due to the length of the charging cord, and our thighs and hips were touching.He looked at me in bewilderment, and I rolled my eyes. "Answer it," I urged.Jayden touched the screen and put it to his ear. "Hello?""Jayden Ronan Keller? Show me your face, will you?"It was a video call. Still in a dazed state, I told him to hold his phone in front of him. His mother's round face appeared on the screen, initially with a concerned expression. However, once his mother saw us together in the small frame in the upper right corner, she looked relieved."There you are," she said with a smile. I couldn't see much of the background, but I figured I saw a large white headboard behind her, typical of an inn. "And apparently you're with Ashley." Her smile widened as her fo
Ashley POVI rolled my eyes and used my other hand as a barrier to block my vision from seeing something I didn't want to see. “You'll never know,” I stated. “Better to be safe before you regret it.”“I'll go change in the bathroom,” he said with a grunt. “I just wanted you to know about the appointment.”His figure disappeared, and I let out a breath that I didn't realize I was holding. The allure of his scent was too strong for me, for some reason. “Why?” I asked without turning around.“Would you like to come along with me?”I frowned. “I can't,” I said quietly. “I'm going to see Jared that day. He and I... we're getting a ring.”It wasn't my idea, nor was it Jared's idea to do that. The first week in April, my parents returned here for a short break and to meet up with Jared before they were forced to return to London. According to my mom, their business venture there hadn't been entirely successful, and still needed more time before they came to a final agreement. Despite the bit
Ashley POVAs time ticked by, March ended and April slowly turned into May, I found myself and Jayden drifting further and further apart. It wasn't a deliberate move by either of us, or at least not a deliberate effort. It just happened.Jayden was spending more time at the dance studio, and he started coming home with a sore throat some days when he decided to hum along to the choreography. He started singing and reading the lyrics whenever he had time in my apartment, and despite me pretending not to notice, I actually did. I loved his voice, pleasant and velvety like that, soothing my mind and body. And he kept showing drastic improvement with each passing week. Also, when he wasn't dancing or singing or memorizing song lyrics, he went and exercised.“I'm getting fat,” he told me as he read comics on the extra bed one night.I was editing an essay at the time, and didn't think much of it until he mentioned it. “I guess not,” I replied bluntly with a shrug.“I've gained almost five
Ashley POVHe didn't speak, but he didn't need to. His silence was enough. However, the stubborn part of me wanted to push him to bring up the topic... more specifically, how he had been affected by his father.“What about you?” I continued cautiously.His eyes narrowed slightly as they scanned my face. “You know about Jayden,” he pointed out.I averted my eyes.“How long have you known?”He didn't sound accusatory, or angry. No, instead, there was something more familiar, something I also felt related to his... childhood.“Too long,” I replied stiffly. I didn't like being reminded of my mistakes, so I replied automatically, defensively with, “You?”“Me too.”And when my eyes locked with his, I saw that it was there. The endless shame, regret, and guilt. It reflected a part deep inside me, so much so that I could hardly bear to look at it.But I forced myself to do so. Because if I hated it, so did Jared. Yet he was brave enough to stick to his stance.Dinner ended shortly after that.
Ashley POVLooking at the menu, I already knew what I wanted to order. My mom's favorite dish at The Monarch was pasta with a sauce made from roasted oysters, so I went with that. By the time the waiter returned with our drinks, Jared and I were ready to order. She took the menus from us, and as I watched Jared pour himself a glass of dark red liquid, I decided to strike up a conversation that would hopefully shed some light on our upcoming wedding and Jayden. It took me a few precious minutes to gather my courage and organize my thoughts, but I finally went ahead with it.I started the conversation with a light topic. “How was Europe?”Jared quietly observed the interior design of the restaurant and kept doing so as he answered. “Warm,” he said, “and dirtier than I imagined. But also incredibly beautiful in moments I didn't think possible.”“How so?” I asked.“I often hitchhike with my group of friends,” he told me as he raised the wine glass to his lips. He took a slow sip, his eyes
Ashley POVAs Jared and I walked out of the building, I spotted David parked and waiting in the car. But instead of going over to him, Jared stopped at the end of the concrete steps and pulled out a small red cardboard package. It was an automatic action, I could see that, from the way he pulled a lighter from the same pocket and pointed it at the cigarette already tucked between his lips.“Wait,” I chided, ”You can't smoke in here.”He glanced at me. “Why not?” he muttered, stroking his cigarette.Peeking over my shoulder, I glanced at the security guard outside the entrance. “That's illegal,” I said after making sure they weren't watching us.He didn't speak, but his lighter stopped halfway to his lips.“I'm not joking,” I continued. “It's illegal in almost all public places.”“I see.” He hurriedly lowered the lighter and stuffed the cigarette into his shirt pocket. “Where else can I go?”“Er.” I scratched my cheek and looked around for the smoking booth shyly. I didn't find one. “G
Ashley POVSmartly dressed in a suit and tie and polished leather shoes, Jared stood outside the apartment entrance, looking like he was ready to walk the red carpet. He had just finished shaving, revealing a clean jaw, and his dark hair was stylishly combed to the side along the neatly cut sides of his head. The scent of men's cologne and aftershave mingled with the sweet scent of flowers coming from the large bouquet of red roses he held in his left hand. I could see gold on his cuff and silver and black leather on his left wrist, which indicated a watch, and probably an expensive one.Compared to how he looked yesterday, for a moment I thought that I was hallucinating.Jared was also checking me out but seemed unfazed as my eyes were glued to him. “Good evening,” he greeted in a stiff, flat voice.“Hi,” I replied plainly. “Is David here too?”“He's waiting in the car.” Jared stepped closer to me and handed me the flowers. “Here. This is for you.”The bundle of roses was surprisingl
Ashley POV“Ash! You home?”Quickly walking back to the entrance, I found Jayden crouching down and untying his shoelaces. He looked up at me, and despite his caramel brown eyes looking heavy with fatigue, his lips curved into a smile. “Did I just wake you up?”“It's Saturday,” I replied automatically. “Who cares if I wear pajamas all day? You look exhausted though,” I added, a little softer.He snorted. “Hunter's a tough trainer,” he replied as he got up and wriggled out of his boots. “But never mind, I'm starving and smell like shit. Let me shower first before we warm things up.”“About that...” I averted my gaze as a pair of curious caramel brown eyes immediately focused on me. “I have plans tonight.”“Oh?”I scratched my arm. “Yeah. With Jared. He'll pick me up around six.”“From here?”I nodded stiffly.“Okay. Looks like I'll have to eat the leftovers alone, then.”I looked up, stunned, and saw him smiling at me before he darted past me and into the bathroom. I had no idea what k
Ashley POVIt was almost eleven hours later when my eyelids finally snapped open. With a big yawn, I sat up in bed and stretched my upper body before dragging myself to the kitchen. The extra bed was empty as I walked by, and as I poured myself a glass of water, I spotted that there were already dishes in the sink.“Jayden?” I called out hesitantly.Hell, no. He wasn't there.As much as I was instantly relieved when I realized that, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a little sad. After all, it was surprisingly lonely having breakfast alone.And despite all the decisions yesterday, I still wanted to see him.The most likely scenario was that Jayden had left for a choreography dance rehearsal with his bandmates, especially since it had become such a routine that he no longer told me that he would be gone for most of the day. It was just that I felt it was a good idea to check the messages on my phone, just in case. And so, after making some warm oatmeal to satisfy my ravenous hunger,
Ashley POV“It's never going to be what you want,” I said softly. “I have my responsibilities and duties as the heiress of Red Moon Inc. just as you have your responsibilities and duties as, you know, Jayden Keller... the hunky celebrity and the golden man.”I sneaked a glance at him, trying to elicit a smile from him, but his face remained stony. His eyes showed no emotion. In the end, I had to look away again. “I have to put my parents and the company first,” I continued, “while you have to put your band members and your image first. Nothing is more important than that to you and me.”“Being forced into marriage is nothing,” I said candidly. “It's just like a drop in the ocean compared to what my parents have sacrificed and done and still continue to do. It's a star in the entire galaxy compared to how hard my grandfather fought and struggled throughout his life to establish this company. And while it's mostly a marriage of convenience now, it's not a bad deal. At least I know Jared