CHAPTER 1

MATTHEW

"WHERE the hell are you from?"

I bowed my head as soon as our eyes met. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko kayang tagalan ang tingin sa kaniya. The coldness was unbearable, like the first time I stared into those eyes since I was fucking eight. Hindi man asul tulad ng kulay ng buong silid kung saan kami naroroon, still, his gray-brown eyes gave me chills down my fucking spine and woke the shits out of me.

"I'm just-"

"Just living your life to its fullest?" he cut me off, still in a calm tone but can feel the sarcasm in his voice. "Aren't you?"

Napakurap ako at saglit siyang sinulyapan bago ko ibinalik ang tingin sa makintab na kahoy na sahig. He was in his black belter Dobok. Nakatayo siya sa gitna ng malawak at walang kagamit-gamit na silid at halatang kanina pang naghihintay.

"We're sorry, Mr. Aristizabal. We're late. It's my fault. Masiyado hong mabigat ang traffic sa daan kaya kami'y tinanghali," said the white-haired old man behind me, trying to save me from my doom.

"You think I will believe that alibi, Agostos? You think I am that stupid to not know what he's busy with?" medyo tumaas ang boses ni Dad pero kalmado pa rin. "Club. Cigarettes. Alcohol. Woman. You think I didn't know that?"

Nanahimik kaming pareho ni Mr. Agostos. I know that my father knows what I am doing. Sa dami ng pera niya, alam kong kaya niyang magbayad para pamanmanan kami at lalo na ako. Yes, I am aware that I and my mom need to hide our identities. People mustn't need to know that we are affiliated with Mr. Martinez Aristizabal, my father, until I am ready to save us from those people. People that you can't trust, especially in the kind of world that my father lived in. It is also the reason why I don't have any friends except for Apollo, who's in Spain right now.

I also know what kind of business my father had, aside from the chain of hotels he managed. I heard him and Mr. Agostos talking about that business two years ago, the last time I was here in this same room. They expect that I will handle that too. Kaya't heto, sa loob ng sampong taon ay tini-train nila ako. But if they would only ask me, I don't have any interest in that business they were talking about. I just want to enjoy my life without any fucking complications. I just want to savor the freedom like what the Philippines has had for years.

Dad hissed his disappoinment, read the unwillingness on my face. "We have no time left. I need to eat my lunch. Bueno. Hasta luego."

Lalagpasan na sana ako ni Dad pero nagsalita ako.

"Lo siento."

He stopped right beside me. Huminga ako nang malalim nang dagain ang dibdib ko ngayong malapit siya sa akin. "Don't be. You're an Aristizabal. We don't apologize. ¿Lo entiendes?"

I nodded, still bowing my head. "Entiendo, Senior."

"Bien," he said, and started walking. "Disculpe."

Saka lamang ako nakahinga nang maluwag nang mawala sa paningin ko ang malaking pares ng mga paa na halos kasing laki ng akin at lumangitngit ang pinto sa pagsara nito. I sighed and looked at the wooden double-doors to find that Mr. Agostos' almost gray, down-turned eyes stared at me.

I smiled at him, but Mr. Agostos just nodded before turning his back at me to follow my father, wearing sympathy on his wrinkled face. Nanatiling nakaukit ang ngiti sa aking labi nang maiwan akong mag-isa sa silid habang nakaharap pa rin sa kakasarado pa lamang na pintuan. Now, what am I going to do? Bukod sa deadspot ang buong silid, bawal din akong lumabas nang walang permiso ni Dad.

Nasa parehong building ng A's Hotel ang silid kung saan ako naroroon. Nasa ground to be exact. Ako, si Dad, at si Mr. Agostos lamang ang nakakaalam nito. All I know is that this room is a secret. Walang ibang nakakaalam ng komplikadong daan papasok dito. If I weren't with Mr. Agostos, maybe I'd have lost my way. Kahit pang limang beses ko nang punta rito, nalilito pa rin ako sa paikot-ikot na daan.

Nag-unat ako at lumapasay sa sahig. I got my phone out of my pocket and stared into it. Dala ko nga ito, hindi ko naman magagamit. Bukod sa mga porn na paulit-ulit ko nang napanood, wala na akong ibang pagkakalibangan pa. Maybe I should d******d some games when I get home. Hindi puro porn na lang para kung mangyari ulit ito, may pampatay ako ng oras sa kakahintay kay Dad. O kung pupunta pa ba siya?

Based on his expressions, even if his fucking face didn't change and he was still stern, I knew he was disappointed in me. He's a man who believes that time is gold. Time is very important to him. He's very strict when it comes to that. Pero wala naman akong balak na tanggapin ang pagiging tagapag-mana niya. Kaya bakit ako magseseryoso sa training na ito?

Halos isang oras akong tumunganga at nakatitig sa sariling repleksyon sa salamin na ceiling nang lumangitngit muli ang pinto, sinakop ang katahimikan ng silid lalo nang marinig ko ang mga yapak na papalapit.

"Mr. Matthew," the deep, hoarse voice said. "You can change your clothes now and I will drive you back home. May biglaang meeting si Mr. Aristizabal at ipagpapaliban muna itong ensayo ninyo."

I took a deep sigh as I got up from lying on the fucking cold floor. Well, I already fucking expected that to happen. "When is the next time, Mr. Agostos? After two fucking years?"

Mr. Agostos shook his head and held his hand out to the right corner of the room, pointing the way to the changing room where we came before we entered this room. "No. Not this time, boy. I will fetch you, uhm, I guess, tomorrow morning."

My forehead crumpled. "Tomorrow morning? I have classes the whole day tomorrow."

"Mr. Agostos already talked to the dean of your department."

"Talk to the Dean of my department?" Nailing ako. "I thought he saved his fucking ass so no one would know I was related to him."

"Pinuprotektahan lamang kayo ni Mr. Aristizabal."

I smirked. "I get it, Mr. Agostos. Ang hindi ko lang maintindihan, ba't pinipilit niyong i-train ako, if in the first, my father won't recognize me as his son."

"Because this is for your own good."

"For my own good?" I almost swallowed my sense of humor because of what he said. "Or for the own good of my Dad's dirty business?"

Hindi nakapagsalita si Mr. Agostos. He stared at me with his flat face. He was not showing any emotion. Pakiramdam ko ay binabasa niya kung anong laman ng isip ko. But after a couple of seconds, Mr. Agostos batted his eyes and sighed as he turned his gaze away from me, surrendering.

"Puwede ka na hong makapagpalit, Mr. Matthew," he said defeatedly. "I will wait for you outside of this room."

"Come on, Mr. Agostos! Tell me. What secrets are you and my father hiding?" I smirked.

Palabas na sana si Mr. Agostos, hawak ang doorknob ng pinto, nang matigilan siya dahil sa tanong kong iyon. Muli siyang napabaling sa akin, ang mga mata'y naniningkit at hindi na maitago ang inis sa kaniyang mukha.

"That's none of your business."

"Not my business?" My sarcastic laughter echoed in all four corners of the room. As far as I know, you've trained me for that business. Kailangan ko rin naman siguro ng kaunting detalye about that business, right?"

Mr. Agostos' jaw clenched. "This is not the right time for that."

"And when is the right time, you're telling?"

"I can't tell." Mariin siyang pumikit at muli akong tinalikuran. But before he went outside completely, he told me as he opened the door. "Si Mr. Aristizabal lamang ang makakapagsabi kung kailan ang tamang oras na iyon. For now, get changed and I will drive you back home to your mother."

"I can managed myself, Mr. Agostos. No need to drive me home."

"That's the order of your father. Sumunod na lang tayo."

Muntikan akong matawa sa narinig mula sa kaniya. Fuck! Hindi ito ang inaasahan ko!

"Okay, then." I shrugged and watched as Mr. Agostos left me alone in that fucking empty room.

Mula sa white belter Dobok, nagpalit ako ng damit pareho noong pumunta kami rito sa A's hotel. Habang inaayos ko ang sintas ng puting rubber shoes na suot, bigla akong napatingin sa sariling repleksyon sa pader na salamin. I am in my plain black V-neck, a black jacket on top, and black jeans.

Staring at my own reflection, what I saw was my dad. Wala akong galit sa kaniya or anything. Hindi ko lang gusto na maging tagapag-mana niya. After I learned about his fucking business, hinding-hindi ko tatanggapin iyon kahit pa ako ang nag-iisang anak at tagapag-mana niya.

After I checked myself in the mirror, running my fingers through my hair, I went out of the room. Medyo mahaba na ang buhok ko sa natural kong gupit kaya baka sa isang parlor na lang ako magpapababa kay Mr. Agostos.

Naabutan ko si Mr. Agostos na may kausap sa telepono. I'm fairly certain he was speaking to my father. Binaba niya kaagad iyon nang mapunta sa akin ang tingin niya. He nodded and started walking. Wala akong nagawa kundi ang sumunod sa kaniya. Magkakandaligaw-ligaw din ako kung magtitipauna ako.

"Mr. Agostos," I called him, almost a whisper. Nag-iingat ako lalo't may iba nang empleyado kaming nakakasalubong nang makalabas kami sa elevator.

Bagama't nasisiguro kong narinig ako ng matanda, ni hindi siya tumigil kahit sulyapan niya lang ako saglit. Alam ko, tulad ko, nag-iingat din siya. Lalo't kabilin-bilinan din noon ni Dad na wala dapat makakaalam na konektado ako kahit sa matandang sekretaryo.

Nang wala nang ibang tao, saka lamang niya ako binalingan. "Ano ho iyon?"

"Medyo mahaba na ang buhok ko, kailangan ko nang magpagupit."

His eyes squinted as he shot a side glance at me. Mabilis lang iyon sapagkat may isang babae kaming nakasalubong. Binati pa nito si Mr. Agostos kaya't alam kong kilala ng babae ang matanda.

"I'll call Mr. Aristizabal," he simply said as he took his phone out from the pocket of his black trouser and put it on his ear.

I groaned and restrained myself to cuss him. Lalo't may nakasalubong ulit kaming dalawang empleyado na kumaway pa sa kaniya. Ang lalaki nitong kasama ay nagawi ang tingin sa akin. Agad kumunot ang noo nito kaya't mabilis kong inilihis ang mukha rito.

"It's a no, Mr. Matthew," he said when we were already outside the premises of A's building.

"Fuck it, Mr. Agostos!" Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili.

"Watch out your foul mouth, boy."

"Come on, Mr. Agostos." Malawak ko nang inihakbang ang mga paa para maabutan ko na siya. Kaunting distansiya na lang ang pagitan namin sa kulay abong kotseng sinakyan namin kamina. "Magpapagupit lang ako."

"It's your father's order. We should obey him."

I mocked. "Obey him."

I heard Mr. Agostos' hiss. Medyo nauna na itong nakarating sa kotse at kasalukuyang binubuksan ang pinto matapos mag-alarm ang sasakyan.

I smirked as the bad thoughts played inside my head. Marahan akong umikot, maingat na lumakad palayo sa kaniya at nagtago sa likod ng isang sasakyan na naka-park.

"Mr. Matthew?"

Halos matawa ako nang marinig ang boses ng matanda. Obey my father. Obey his freaking face. I am Matthew Gabriel Aristizabal. I own my fucking life and I will rule it the way I want.

Halos pagapang, unti-unti akong umalis ng parking lot. At nang makalayo na sa kinatatayuan ng matanda, mabilis na akong tumakbo. But I halted when I bumped into someone. Kaagad akong napakamot sa batok ko nang marinig ang pag-impit niya.

"Hoy, Mister! Puwede bang tulungan mo ako rito!"

Napangisi akong bumaling sa kaniya. Nakaupo ang babae sa kalsada at kitang-kita ko ang pamumula ng kaniyang mukha. "Eh, sorry, Miss. Nagmamadali ako eh."

"Tanga ka ba?" Lalong nanlisik ang violet niyang mga mata. Napansin ko rin na kakulay din niyon ang buhok niya at maging ang damit nitong nakapanloob sa itim na blazer. "Nabangga mo kaya ako. Puwede nga kitang kasuhan dahil dito."

I laughed at what she said. "And what the fucking complaint are you going to file against me? Hit and run? Hindi ko na kasalanan, Miss Barney, kung haharang-harang ka sa daan."

"Anong tinawag mo sa akin potang ina ka?"

Lalong lumakas ang tawa ko. Nai-imagine ko ang usok na lumalabas sa butas ng kaniyang ilong dahil sa sobrang galit. Her face looked like a tomato too.

I said sarcastically, "Barney."

"Potang ina, inulit mo pa talaga!" she yelled.

"Anong nangyayari rito, Vio?" tanong ng babaeng kararating na kaagad lumuhod para daluhan si Miss Barney.

"Eh, ang potang inang iyan kasi, nabangga na nga ako, iniinsulto pa ako!" sumbong ni Barney sa kasama na parang bata.

Handa na akong halakhakan siya pero kaagad akong natigilan nang balingan ako ng babaeng kasama ni Barney. I gulped when her emerald eyes drifted over me. Hindi ko alam pero parang hinigop ng mga mata nito ang buong atensyon ko at ang lahat sa paligid ay huminto maliban sa kaniya. Her long, wavy blonde hair was slowly dancing through the air. Her heart-shaped lips moved sensuously, inviting me to kiss her.

I'm not good at describing people, but all I could say is that she is beautiful - no, she's more than fucking that.

"Mr. Matthew!" a grumpy voice called out.

I blinked thrice, trying to pull myself up from the spell that the green-eyed woman had cast on me. Tumatakbong palapit sa kinatatayuan ko si Mr. Agostos mula sa parking lot ng A's building at halatang hapong-hapo na. Umiling ako at mabilis na tumakbo, pero nang makalayo nang kaunti, binalingan ko muli ang babaeng may kulay berdeng mga mata.

They were still staring at me, but my eyes dreamily bore on her.

She caught my heart.