Chapter 1: Layla

Layla’s p.o.v.

I am standing at the deserted border of our Darkwood pack's territory, waiting for my boyfriend. Waiting and tired. Because he is always late. 

It's fine, though... He is the alpha of this pack. So he has countless work. I don't like fighting so I always understand his unreasonable reasons. 

But today, today no matter how much I am trying to tell myself that it's fine, that it's okay...that he might really be so busy that he forgets his girlfriend is waiting for him in the most dangerous place of our territory. I just can't stay calm anymore. He...he must have forgotten, right? 

" Or maybe he just doesn't care." 

Raven, my wolf replied inside my head, making me throw the wooden pillar down the cliff. I am not this violent usually. Not this angry. But Jeffery really pissed me off today. And my wolf...saying logical things like this. It's pissing me off even more. 

Fuck it. I don't care. I can put the fences alone...like every other impossible work I do for this pack. Wiping the sweat from my forehead, I picked up the gigantic pillar and carried it up the cliff. 

There are lots of rogues these days...trying to cross our borders. Even the werewolves of other packs are attacking our borders. Resources have been lacking recently, so relations between the packs are tense. We needed continuous patrols in all of our borders. 

However, this dangerous cliff never needed patrolling before, but these days you can't be more sure. 

Jeffery promised he would help me with this work. And then, we can have a little picnic...some time alone for ourselves. Huh. I was so fucking idiot to believe him. Look at me now, such a romantic date this is, right Raven? 

I tried to talk to my wolf...even fighting with her would be okay. This loneliness, I can't take it anymore. But even my wolf is not replying anymore. Again, I am used to this. The connection between me and my wolf is sometimes unstable. I even changed a lot later than usual werewolves. 

And then, I worked harder. Trained harder and become the warrior this pack can rely on. All for Jeffery. All because I wanted to be worthy to be his Luna...worthy of his love. 

I threw another pillar in anger. Great. Shaking my head, I again strolled down the cliff to carry another huge pillar...my mind felt all hazy, clouded by all those memories of me and my boyfriend. 

It's been two years since Jeffery and I were in a relationship, I was eighteen when he finally confessed his love. But now when I think about it... Was that really love? Or am I just some kind of trophy for him? The only female warrior. The weirdo. The unusual one. Even his friends sometimes joked that he had tamed a beast. 

I am not a beast. I am not...really. 

Shit. I wiped the pathetic tears with the sleeves of my blue t-shirt. It's all dirty with mud and dust. Just like my face... No wonder Shannon, my little sister always makes fun of me. She is not evil or anything...it's just teasing. 

But I guess...there is some truth in it. I am ugly and weird. A beast. 

My knees shook as I crouched down on the dirty path and tried to mind-link my boyfriend again. This is so pathetic really. 

" Jeffery... Are you coming or not, I have been waiting here for an hour now.", I sighed, relieved that my voice hadn't broken and he wouldn't know I was crying. 

Last time he got all angry seeing my tears... It was weak for the future Luna to cry. Those words still echoed whenever these useless tears tried to break free from my eyes. 

Closing my eyes I focused on the voice inside my head. I think I heard Jeffery mind-linking me back. 

" I... I can't hear you." 

My head feels heavy all of a sudden... it's like a pang, like someone is crushing my brain. Shit. My eyes rolled back inside my head, every inch of my flesh burning...my bones, it hurts. 

I can hear my own scream echoing around the dense forest before everything gets all blank. 

~~~ 

" Jeffery...babe?" 

I mind link my boyfriend as soon as I felt my eyelid move. The grey sky above me is all dark...stars shining brightly above me here. It's a dark moonless night. 

I have been unconscious for a whole day. And I am still laying in the same place, above the same dirt. Didn't anyone come to find me? They...they must be busy with pack-related work. It's not a big deal. 

" Jeffrey?" 

I mind-linked when I heard a voice inside my head. It's my boyfriend...I can still recognize his voice even though my senses are not working. 

"Your sister needs you, Layla. Come home." 

I frowned, " B-but I...." 

I need you. 

He already shut down the link. I shrugged off whatever negative thoughts were punching my brain. Must be something important. No need to feel all sad and emotional. Taking a deep breath I somehow forced my body to stand up, tried to talk to Raven. But she is silent. 

On the way to my home, several times I tried to mind link my boyfriend and tried to connect with my wolf. But all I can hear is silence. What's wrong? Even my heart feels heavy all of a sudden. Jeffery said something about my sister... I hope Shannon is alright. Her health has not been well recently. 

The white wooden door of our two-story house was wide open when I reached there. 

Straightening my painful body, I stepped inside the door...and my eyes finally found what I had been afraid of for a long time now. It was just an intuition. Just a senseless doubt... I used to shrug that feeling away. 

And now, it's slapping me right on the face. 

I watched my boyfriend, Jeffery, holding my younger sister's hand...both sitting too close on the couch. Both of our parents surrounding them. And the worst thing is, they all look happy. 

Somehow I knew what was happening here before I even asked the question. It's so damn clear. It's always been clear. I was so stupid to realize. 

So damn foolish to trust. 

I took several steps and stood in front of the couch now. Then only Jeffery's eyes left my sister's face and met mine. I tried to act calm as I asked, " What the hell is happening here?!" 

Jeffery ruffled his blonde hair with a hand as he stood up, " Look, Layla. I don't want you to overreact." 

I couldn't help but laugh. That's all I could do as I watched my sister hugging my boyfriend from behind...her delicate arms wrapped around his torso like snakes on the sandalwood tree. 

" Overreact on what?" I forced my eyes to stay on Jeffery, " What's happening? And why...why are you guys holding each other like this?" 

" Shannon is sick." 

I gritted my teeth, " And don't you think I know my sister better than you?" 

" Not really.", Shannon screeched from behind, her blue eyes all angry and piercing "You know nothing about me....always focused on yourself and your silly fights." 

What the... I could have said a lot of things. Could have reminded her of the times I saved her and this family from the rogue...could tell her how much work I do. The fights I liked... were never fun. But a necessity for us and this pack to survive. 

I could have said it. But all I could do was take a step closer and beg her with my eyes to not do this. Not break whatever love we had. 

" What the hell are you even saying, kiddo?" 

" I am not a kiddo.", she snapped at me, making me take a step back. I can't believe she is saying this. " I am only a year younger than you... Don't treat me like a baby!" 

" Hey...hey, Shannon, it's alright okay. Don't get upset.", Jeffery hugged her, made her sit on the couch again before he gazed at me again. All emotionless now. " I will explain her everything." 

" Explain what?" 

Jeffery pressed his lips together as he watched me, " That I am marrying your sister." 

" Is this some kind of joke?", I scoffed, giving a glance to my parents, just to be sure. " Mom...dad?" 

The pity inside their eyes was my only response. 

What happened after that is just a haze. I was standing there, listening to Jeffery's bullshit excuse and the disgusted confession of my sister... But it felt like I was not really there. I was just looking at them. Listening to them. But can't utter a single word. What's the point anyway... They have already made up their mind. 

I stood quietly as my boyfriend explained that my sister's illness was getting worse and that she is likely to die soon. Such a joke... She is sick, but I don't think it was that serious.  Anyway everyone believes she is.

And Shannon... Her only wish is to marry my boyfriend. Like me, she also grew up with Jeffrey and is deeply in love with him. 

I sighed as Jeffery said he wanted to announce my sister as his Luna first, to fulfill her wish, and then after she died, he and I can be together again.

Wow. Such a great plan. I should dance at their wedding, right? Maybe I should start dancing now...such a fucking good news this is. 

I mean...what's the big deal, right? 

I had patrolled the borders, spent all these years helping Jeffery, kept Jeffery company, assisted Jeffery in every way I could, and trained myself to be the best warrior despite the flaws of my wolf. All for Jeffery. 

And this is how he repays my love? Marrying my sister all of a sudden?! Great. Fucking. Great. 

"After all, she's your sister.", Jeffery took a deep breath. Looks like he is finally done with his shitty excuse. " We're lucky to live in a time of peace. As the future Luna, you should have a big heart and be kind. After all, your sister is dying. I'll make you Luna as soon as she's dead. Just be kind and fulfill her dream now."

I am utterly disgusted.

But my body, it feels like it turns into a mountain of ice. All I could do was observe. All I could do was see the people I love and think of as family...betraying and using me like this. 

Even my own parents. They are asking me to be generous and mentioned that there is a great doctor who might be able to help with my sister's condition. 

" There are still three months until the mating ceremony, maybe you can take the time to travel a bit and see if you can find a good doctor for your sister." 

I locked eyes with my mother as she suggested that. And she only gave me a pitiful smile. Can't she see how angry I am? How suffocating this feels... I wanted to scream. Wanted to punch Jeffery. Shout at my sister. 

But the thing is...what good that will bring? 

This isn't the first time when Shannon took something that was mine. And like always... I have to be the big sister and let go. It's not like I ever had a choice anyway. Just like tonight, I thought as I glanced near the table.

They even packed my bag already. Great. 

I gave a tight smile to my parents, " So, you guys are asking me to leave and find a doctor...while they both will be busy inside their love bubble?" 

" Don't be so cruel, Layla.", Jeffery growled, jerking my gaze at him. " I am only doing what's best for everyone." 

Yeah. Probably doing what's best for your dick. Asshole. I wanna say that. But I didn't. It's like, suddenly I lost my ability to speak. Or maybe...maybe I am scared that I will start crying if I try to fight or shout at him. 

Jeffrey doesn't even deserve my tears anymore. 

The irony is...  If I did find the doctor and Shannon survived, then she would be the future Luna, leaving no place for me in this family at all, and my life in the pack would certainly be harder. 

And if I didn't find the doctor. Then she really might die. And even after everything I don't hate her enough to let her die. So damn stupid I am. 

I laughed as I picked up the bags. " Fine. Do what's best for both of you.", I gave a smile to both Shannon and Jeffery, " Congratulations on your wedding. Maybe you live a long happy life and have cute little pubs to fill this pack with more shit." 

I think they said something from behind about me being rude again. But I didn't stay to hear. I just walked away. I have no idea where I am going... But right now I wanna be far away with the house I grew up in. 

As I was walking on the dark road, tugging my backpack on one shoulder, I heard a voice inside my head. 

A sad smile came to my lips as I recognized the voice. " Fiona?" 

" Where the hell were you?!" 

She mind linked me back...causing my ears to nearly explode due to her loud voice. My best friend is crazy. Shaking my head, I sighed, " In the hell." 

" What?!" 

" Just come pick me up.", I replied and shut our link.

And just in few minutes, she was here. I was standing, leaning over an oak tree that was near my house. Fiona must have smelled me when she parked her bright red car in front of my house. 

Right now she is opening her door for me. Throwing my bag in the back seat, I crouched down on the passenger seat. And just like that...the emotions I have been holding poured out like the river. 

Fiona drove quietly as she heard everything. Not once did she interrupt while I was having my embarrassing breakdown. She is my childhood friend and even though we sometimes fight, but I know she is the only person I can really trust. The only person who never used me. 

" I always knew your sister was a bitch.", Fionna mumbled after I was done telling her every detail. "She really proved it." 

My mouth parted to reply, but the sudden pang in my head made me clench my knuckles instead. Shit. These headaches are getting worse. 

" Your wolf again?" 

I nodded at Fiona and she sighed. Judging by the long pause, I can guess she is thinking something so hard. Which is rare because Fiona barely thinks. She is a free spirit, so carefree. A calm to my boring uptight personality. 

" You know...there is a famous doctor in Blackthorn Moon pack who can help you." 

I knew she must be thinking something stupid. But can never guess this stupid. I laughed, " No one from the Blackthorn Moon pack will help me...or anyone from this pack. They are our worst enemy... We have been fighting longer than I could remember." 

" You can still try though." 

And with that sentence... Fiona turned the car around, and she was driving straight to the highway. What the serious hell?! 

I gaped at Fiona as she kept driving, " Where the hell are you taking me?" 

" To their pack." 

Is she crazy? 

" What? Why.... I am stinking right now. And in a condition like this, they will think I am some rouge wolf." 

She gave me a side glance and smirked, " Or a bagger." 

Evil bitch. 

" Shut up, Fiona. Don't be impulsive." 

She only laughed at me and right now she is driving even faster. " Sometimes being impulsive is good." 

I banged my head on the closed window beside me. " Yeah, say that to me when those scary dangerous wolves will be chewing off your ears." 

Crazy evil Fiona is laughing at me right now. 

Tell me why I decided to ask Fiona to pick me up?! She is...so damn crazy. Knowing her, I should have known she would do something utterly idiotic. Like driving me to an enemy pack to get checked up by their doctor. Does this make any sense to anyone? I don't think so.

" You know people say the alpha of the blackthorn moon pack is gay...or impotent." 

I have no idea from where she hears these kinds of rumors. And...

" What this has anything to do with me and my wolf, Fiona." 

I want to punch her. But she is driving so I will control myself. For now.

" Nothing... I am just wondering if maybe we can confirm that too.", she gave me a glance, smirking as she grabbed my breast. "You know, if he is not gay or impotent, he will really fall for these big boobies." 

" You are crazy!"", I jerk her pervert hand away. And my boobs are not that big. They are normal. Anyway.  " I have no desire to seduce some Alpha for your experiment and gossip." 

" You don't even have to seduce him. Any man with an eye can see how gorgeous you are, Layla." 

Ah. Now I know why she is doing this and saying things like this. She wants to make me feel good. Sometimes, Fiona can do things a little too dramatically. 

" Not my own boyfriend though.", I mumbled lowly before I could stop myself. 

But... it's true. My sister was always the prettier one. Small. Feminine. Obedient. A perfect she-wolf. Whereas me... I am just so wild and dirty. Who in the right mind would find me attractive? 

" Don't let Jeffery ruin that for you. He is an idiot." 

I shook my head as I closed my eyes. " I don't know..." 

And if we are really going to that Blackthorn Moon pack now, I might as well find that famous doctor and ask him to help my sister too. All I have to do is ignore the foolish ideas of my best friend. 

I don't care if some alpha is gay or impotent. There is nothing wrong with him anyway. People should stop caring about other people's personal lives. 

Anyway... I have no desire to meet that famous Alpha. No damn desire to ever be interested in a man...to ever trust a man. 

I am done with love. It's bullshit anyway.