SI PAPA ay tila strong at mighty habang nasa harap ng pinto. Nakasarado pa ito ngayon at kapapasok lang ng mga sponsors at guests.Pakiramdam ko tuloy surreal ang ganap na ito. Lahat ay parang nagi-slow motion sa aking mga mata. Pati na ang puting kurtina at ang kiyemeng puting mga rosas na nasa luklukan ng pinto. Maalon ang araw na iyon at sumabay ang aking belo sa hangin. Mahigpit kong hawak si Papa habang nakapatong ang kanyang kamay sa akin. Si Mama ay nasa aking tabi, ngumingiti at ina-assure ako na magiging okay din ang lahat ng ito.The door opened. It was like a magical door leading all of us to a new world. Except that this world will hell to me.Hindi naman talaga ako relihiyosong tao. I talk to God in my head from time to time but this time... as I take my small steps on the red carpet. I confessed that I don't like what's really happening, but I will trust because it is already happening.Ang unang tanaw ko kay Damon sa altar ay noong nakapasok na kami sa chapel. His eyes
MY MOOD was perfect for our entrance dance and our first dance. I probably look happy and yes, I am. Lalo na dahil mukhang nagulantang siya sa huling banat ko sa kanya.I was genuinely really happy on the reception. Even the speeches made me smile. Samantalang si Damon, seryosong seryoso. Animo'y isinasapuso ang mga abiso ng matatandang principal sponsors para sa amin."A happy wife is a happy life, that is the secret to a happy marriage," the last speaker said."See? You should make me happy," bulong ko kay Damon.Kanina ko pa siya inaasar sa mga abiso. I am enjoying it so much.He glared at me."Maaapektuhan ang performance mo sa business world, kapag hindi ako masaya."He sighed heavily while looking at me."Kailangan pasayahin mo ako."Nagtaas siya ng kilay. "Ano bang klase ang kasiyahang gusto mo? Just tell me, I will provide."Nanatili ang ngiti ko habang nagkakatinginan kami. Napatingin ako sa kamay niyang hinawi pa ang takas na buhok sa gilid ng mukha ko. Pagkatapos ay nilapag
OUR GUEST are prepared to send us off Medyo nakakahiya nga dahil pati pa iyon ay panonoorin nila. Hindi naman sila obliged pero dahil ihahatid kami ng ibang relatives ko, nakisali na rin ang iilang guests.Nasa lobby na ako ngayon. Maaga kaming tutulak pa Maynila dahil traffic. Mamaya pa naman talaga ang flight namin pero para hindi ma-late, maaga kami.I kissed my mother. Papa was there watching us intently. Nilalapitan na rin ako ng ibang tiyahin ko.Some of them teasing me about their lingerie gifts. Nilingon ko ang pinanggalingan ko. Magkasunod kaming naglakad ni Damon kanina pero wala pa siya.Naghintay ako saglit. When everyone is busy talking about their itineraries for today, I decided to walk back to see where Damon is.Natanaw ko siya sa pasilyo, kausap ang tiyahin niya. Iniisip ko namang nagpapaalam lang ito aalis na sana ako nang narinig ng kaunti ang pinag-uusapan."Kaya ba wala si Fiona sa kasal mo? Sana maayos n'yo 'yan, Damon."Fiona? Who's that? Why am I curious? I do
ISA ISA niya talagang tiningnan ang pictures ko. Binabasa kahit mahaba ang caption, minsan pati pa comments ch-in-icheck. Kunot ang noo niya nang nabasa ang ilang months nang naipost na picture na may comments ng kaibigan ko kaksama si Luis."You have the worst crowd," he said.I sighed. "How can you say that? Kailangan ba nasa mga nerds ako para masabi mong tamang crowd ang kinabibilangan ko?""No, but how are you so close to these. Most of your friends are rich and bums. Most are involved in illegal drugs scandal as well. At hindi ba, last year lang naaalala ko na pinroblema ng Papa mo ang aksidente sa drag race ninyo sa Cebu?""So... you know me?""l know you by name. Your father is my boss and he talks about your crazy escapades whenever he's mad." "Talaga? Hindi mo pa ako nakikita talaga?"His jaw clenched. Sinipat ko naman siya, hinahamon talaga ang sinabi niyang hindi niya naman ako kilala. How is that even possible right? That's out of this world! I decided to give away my vir
EVEN he bathroom was idea for pictures. May isang dingding na salaming nakatunghay sa dagat. Ang tubig naman sa tub ay puno ng rose petals. Imbes na magsho-shower lang ako bago magbihis ng bikini at ang cover up, natagalan ako dahil naisipan kong lumubog sa bathtub.I didn't want Damon right now so I just put my phone somewhere and took many pictures. Lahat na ng puwedeng picture, ginawa ko na. At lahat naman, puro maganda.Inabot kaya ako ng isa at kalahating oras doon bago lumabas. Damon was already on the bed, sitting and waiting. Nang lumabas ako sa walk in closet, nilingon niya ako. His eyes grazed my body at saka lang bumaling sa mga mata nang nagsalita ako. "Tapos na ako. I'll tour around the villa.""Alright. I'll be done in a minute."I just nodded and went out of the bedroom.Pagkalabas, tanaw agad ang dagat pero may salamin lang bilang dingding ng buong villa. Pagkaliko ay ang dining area na nakita ko kanina bago pumasok sa kuwarto.There's a small door on the dining area l
WE TOOK at least five pictures together. Sa unang tatlong pictures, natanto kong hindi ko alam paano magpose kasama siya.Nakatayo lang ako, ganoon din siya pero dalawa roon ang nakatingin siya sa akin. Menacing and awkward smile while he's watching me.The third one was a stolen shot. Sa ibang angle iyon at nagkatinginan kami.The fourth and fifth pictures, I directed at mas sweet. Iniisip kong maganda iyon ang iupload.I heard the splashes from the pool habang nakatingin ako sa cellphone. Nilingon ko at nakitang naghubad na ng t-shirt si Damon at naligo na! "Hey, you still have solo pictures!""No way."Umirap ako at imbes na sumuko, kinuhanan na lang siyang basa. Sa cellphone ako una nakatingin pero hindi ko mapigilan ang paglipat ng mga mata ko sa totoong Damon sa harap.He's good looking, alright. His muscles were all in their right places and it suited his height. Hindi rin siya sobrang puti o sobrang moreno. At kahit basa at magulo ang itim niyang buhok ngayon, guwapo pa rin si
GUSTO kong mang-inis pero hindi ko magawa. I am also guilty of whatever is on my mind.Can't sleep, Damon? Are you so bothered by me that you still need to let out some steam?Sarap sanang asarin pero ang confident ko naman, eh, iyon din ang iniisip ko. I am not actively horny or whatsoever. I just didn't want to pretend asleep when I can't. At ayaw ko ring mahalata niya na hindi ako nakatulog agad.I want to snore the moment I hit the sack. I want him to know that I am really asleep so he won't think I am bothered.Kaya heto at pareho kaming tahimik at medyo awkward habang nagji-gym. He's lifting while I'm running on the treadmill.Nililingon ko siya habang tumatakbo rito sa treadmill. Minsan napapansin kong sumusulyap siya sa gitna ng pagli-lift niya. The heck?!If I don't create a banter now, mauunahan niya ako!Think, Ysa.Binilisan ko ang pagjo-jogging sa treadmill, frustrated na dahil wala namang naiisip. Kinabahan ako at muntik nang nahulog sa pagtakbo nang nakitang lumapit siy
IT WAS PAST TWO when we went home. I was exhausted from all the walking. Madalas ko pa siyang hilahin para mapagod nga ako and it was successful.Nasa tabi kami ng pool pagkatapos mag swimming. Naka higa ako sa lounge samantalang abala siya sa pagbabasa. Hinihila ako ng antok. Lalo ba dahil hinihele ako ng hangin at magandang tugtog.Sa huli, umahon ako. Napabaling siya sa akin at masama akong tiningnan."What's with you?" he asked because of my sudden move.Hindi ako puwedeng antukin at matulog! Ire-reserve ko ang tulog ko mamayang gabi! Tingnan mo 'tong mokong na 'to at parang walang problema!"Ang sakit ng katawan ko, maybe I should request for a spa," I said trying to dodge his question.Umiling siya at bumaling na naman sa binabasa."Alright. We'll have our spa later. Before our dinner, I'm gonna use the gym. How about you?"Medyo lumakas ang loob ko dahil naisipang magpa spa, bukod pa sa antok na ngayon, at pagod pa, siguradong sigurado akong makakatulog ako!I smiled and leaned
NANG nasa tamang palapag na, nasa pintuan niya na agad ako. I clicked the door bell and waited for his door to open. He opened it after seconds. His eyes darkened when he saw me standing outside. Nagtaas din ang kilay niya at isang beses na marahang pumikit. "Why are you here?" he asked, a ghost of a smile is hiding on his lips. "Ayaw mo ba ako rito?" sagot ko, nanatili sa labas ng pintuan niya. He then crossed his arms. Hindi niya ako pinapapasok. Nanatili ang tingin niya sa akin. "Nagpaalam ka ba?" I rolled my eyes. "Hindi na ako bata, Damon. I can do whatever I want whenever I want. My father is just being overprotective but it's already out of place. I'm not a teenager." He nodded and swallowed hard. "Hindi na kita ginising kanina. Your father also told me to just go home so..." Umiling ako sa inaasal ni Papa. "Yup. I got tired of waiting and I was exhausted so..." Nagtagal ang tingin naming dalawa bago siya tumango, para bang natauhan. "Hinatid ko Sina Tiya sa bahay kani
PAGKATAPOS ng usapan namin sa study, Damon was also summoned. I have heard he's arrived a while ago. He's just waiting for my father's call. Kaya nang tinawag siya ni Papa at inasahan ni Papa na sila lang muna ang magkakausap, hinayaan ko na.I was also exhausted from all of what happened the whole day. Kaya sa pagod at paghihintay ko na matapos ang meeting nila, hindi ko na tuloy naabutan"Si Damon?" tanong ko nang bumaba.Natanaw kong nasa sala na si Mama at Papa. I assume that their meeting with him is done."Umuwi na," si Papa."He wanted to stay and wait for you for a while but your father here told him that you're exhausted for the day. Kaya minabuti niyang umuwi na lang para pagpahingahin ka,"Tumango ako at saglit na nag-isip. My father excused himself when his phone rang. Dumiretso naman ako sa kusina para kumuha ng tubig at saglit na magpahinga.Kalaunan, nang gumabi, I had dinner with my parents. My brothers were also invited and that was the time when my parents explained
"IT'S NEGATIVE," kuya informed me.Natigilan ako saglit. The relief came afterwards. Although I have doubts, recent events and realizations made me renew my faith towards my father. Lalo na dahil kinausap niya mismo si Ashley Ortega, at na alam ni Mama ang tungkol dito.To know that the results were really negative was such a big relief."The positive tests were not published, as instructed.""Positive tests?""The one with a different sample, Ysa. Tama nga ang sinabi mo. She probably did get some samples from you "That was a speculation but it's different to hear it that way.Hindi ako makapaniwala na umabot nga'ng talaga si Fiona doon. I hated her to the bones but now that everything is revealed, I realized there was a part of me who hoped that she was credible. Desperate but still credible. But knowing this right now, it seems like everything is crumbling.She is desperate and she is a liar. Maybe, she didn't really want to hurt me that night, she only want my sample, but it was a
AFTER what Damon has said, Papa stepped in and lorded the floor. Siya naman ngayon ang binuhusan ng tanong na kaswal niya namang sinagot. Halos paulit-ulit lang ang mga tanong ng reporters, naghihintay na magkamali sa isasagot pero dahil totoo lahat ng mga sagot ni Papa, hindi sila nakahanap ng butas.The press conference ended. Takot akong magbasa sa mga panibagong articles at tulala pa ako sa study ni Papa habang pinoproseso ang mga nasagot nila roon. Damon just revealed everything! I'm not planning to keep our relationship a secret but I was also shocked that it's that openHe wanted to protect me so he had to reveal the truth. Hindi ko nga lang alam kung paniniwalaan iyon ng mga tao but seeing that he has a good credibility from the press, they'd tone down for sure.Sa dami ng iniisip ko, hindi ko na halos namalayan ang nagdaang oras. Nagulat na lang ako nang pumasok sa study si Papa, kasunod si Mama at si Damon. Napatayo ako galing sa pagkakaupo sa swivel chair at agad na sinalub
PAGKALABAS ng sasakyan ko, natanaw nga namin na may iilang ang nag-aabang sa lobby. Iniisip ko na paniguradong mas maraming nag-aabang sa condo ni Damon ngayon. Mas interesado ang mga taong malaman ang sasabihin niya dahil mas pinagkakatiwalaan siya kumpara sa akin.Tahimik ako sa biyahe. Damon couldn't stop watching me even as he drives the car. Sinalubong ako ng iilang kasambahay namin nang nakarating. Damon made sure that I went inside our house. At ibinalita sa akin na wala si Mama at Papa roon dahil maaga sila sa opisina. My father's conference will be moved today because of the news.Binalingan ko si Damon."Hintayin na Ianq natin si Mama at Papa rito para makausap natin."Damom shook his head. "I'll talk to your parents now, Ysa.""Pero Damon, ang daming media. For sure they will want your statement.""Then I'll give my statement."Tinitigan ko siya, punong puno ng pag-aalala."Don't worry, okay?""You haven't been in an intrigue this big. The media can be harsh and they twist
I COULDN'T believe that I had such a good night sleep despite everything that happened that day. O siguro dahil nawala ang mga mabibigat na nakadagan sa isipan ko. The DNA test was done, I had a good conversation and a more open relationship with Damon... and I think that is enough, despite the chaos.Nga lang, kadidilat pa lang ng mga mata ko kinaumagahan, nakita ko na ang abalang mga mensahe sa cellphone ko. I saw missed calls from my cousins, which was unusual.Napabalikwas ako sa kama nang natanaw na tumatawag si Nics. Sinagot ko agad iyon."What?" I said."Awake, finally? Sorry to bring bad news to your morning but...""What?" I said in anticipation."Your father is busy answering the media's questions right now. Apparently, the nature of your relationship with Damon leaked. I traced it earlier this morning, Fiona Suarez was interviewed by an insider, kaya kumalat-""What?!" Napatayo ako.Nics filled me with the details. Ni hindi pa niya alam ang buong pangyayari pero kagabi raw
HINDI KO alam kung paano ko sasabihin sa kanya iyon. I-alo na dahil pinagbigyan niya si Papa sa isang pabor na puwedeng sumira rin sa pangalan niya - ang pakasalan ako.It was as if he trusted my family so much, he dedicated his life to us. And now, when problems rise, it's my family who threw him out of the bus."I mean...""I'm not trying to change his mind about it, Ysa. Gusto ko lang din... humarap sa parents mo. Bilang... boyfriend mo."I gritted my teeth. Not because I was angry, I was trying not to feel a leap in my heart. I cleared my throat and tried to compose myself. Hinuli niya ang mga mata ko at agad akong nanlumo nang muling naalala ang problema."I'm sorry.."I'm sorry what?" he said with a low tone.Hinuli niya ang mga mata ko."Nagulat ako sa sinabi ni Papa kanina. Hindi ko alam paano sasabihin sa kanya na boyfriend kita-""That's alright. I don't mind if I have to face him to tell him that, Ysa,"Kinagat kong muli ang labi ko. "Ang totoo... sinabi niyang„, a-ayaw niy
SA TOTOO LANG, hindi ko alam kung ano ang gagawin ko pagkatapos sabihin ni Damon iyon. He looked at me intently, not sure if he's waiting for an answer or just weighing my reaction"It's your family's problem," I said as my throat run dry."It is. But I want to consult you. we both know that this is still somehow related to you... or us."Napatingin ako sa kanya at agad ko namang ibinaling sa ibang bagay ang mga mata ko."Umuwi ka na lang at kausapin mo sila. I won't mind."His brow furrowed and he remained looking at me.Napatingin din tuloy ako sa kanya, ako naman ngayon ang naninimbang. What does he want me to say? Hindi ba iyon naman ang tamang gawin niya? Ayaw kong makialam sa pag-uusapan nila dahil bago pa ako, nariyan na si Fiona. Kamag-anak niya ang Tiyo at Tiya niya. Kahit pa tingin nila'y mag-asawa kami, it's not true. I'm just his girlfriend. And even if we were indeed married, I can't just butt in on their family affairs."It's your family's problem. Oo, I may be related t
NAKIKINIG ako pero habang ganoon ay natanaw ko na nakatitig si Papa sa akin. I looked at him as well. He sighed and nodded before talking."Alam kong naipaliwanag ko na ang nangyari sa inyo ni Damon, pero gusto ko lang sabihin na nagsisisi ako sa mga naging padalos dalos kong desisyon."Both my cousins looked at me. Natahimik ako at nakinig lang kay Papa."I know I should've done this the moment I revealed that your marriage wasn't filed, but I was a coward and I still wanted my plan to work. To cover up for your pasts scandals, Ysa."He held his hand up in the air to stop me from talking.Umaamba akong magsasalita."Pagkatapos lumabas ng resulta, gusto ko nang sabihin sa media na hindi totoo ang pagpapakasal ninyo ni Damon. That I did that as a parent who tried to make wrong things right, the wrong way. It was a foolish decision and I take full responsibility over it."Nabitin sa ere ang mga sasabihin ko sa gulat sa sinabi ni papa."l don't want Damon for you..." he said.My eyes wid