2. A Recurring Nightmare

Kanya's POV

“Ah!!!” I screamed as loudly as I could as a red mist of blood flowed from Eros’s chest—enveloping the warehouse where I stabbed him.  He widened my eyes, and my breath was wheezing like I had run tens of meters away, and a cold sweat drenched my whole body, luckily I didn’t wet myself out of fear. 

It would be so embarrassing for a woman my age, terrified of having nightmares of bed-wetting. Just imagining it felt even more terrifying than stabbing Eros in the chest with a dagger.

I tried to straighten my body. My head was hurt as if a club had hit it. I manage my breathing to be more relaxed, and then I lean back.  

“That dream again, over and over again with the same ending,” I murmured. “Huh,” I gave myself a weakly sighing that is all I can do for now when my breathing has started to get better, not wheezing like a moment ago.

I looked at my ten fingers that typed the script with the murder part in it, the hand that had stabbed the chest of the man named Eros. They are still the same straight without the slightest scuff.

My throat felt dry from screaming, not just in the dream, but it was in reality. I took the glass that was full of water on the nightstand. However, I immediately stopped moving my hands when I reached the glass above the nightstand.

Strange! I pulled my hand back.

“Wait a minute. Didn’t I fall asleep at the study? After I turned off the laptop and everything was dark. How come I was in bed?” I spontaneously took the glass on the nightstand without hesitation. Then take a quick sip of the water.

A glass full of water has filed my throat in one gulp. I trembled with confusion as well as fear. Did I sleepwalk last night so that I was in bed? Even complete with the blanket over my body. It is crazy! Not enough with recurring nightmares, now strange things like this are happening.

“Did Sam come back to move me to the bed? There’s no way he could come back again because it’s late. If it wasn’t him, then who else?”

I massaged my temples because my headache became worse when the face of the man I stabbed last night flashed in my mind. Every time this dream comes as it swallows me alive, I fear that I will go crazy because of such a nightmare. 

I’ve had the intention of meeting a psychiatrist. But I discouraged myself because I felt it didn’t matter and I could handle it. I overcame this thing called a nightmare, even though my head’s pain was like a burst in my brain. It hurts.  

“Eros.” Instantly, the name of the man in my dream just popped out of my mouth. “It can’t be him! He’s not real!” I immediately brushed off these ridiculous thoughts. 

There’s no way Eros would take me to bed and then enter my dreams, right? “Hahaha, what nonsense.” I was giggling awkwardly and got out of bed with the felt of a massive head. I was stepping unsteadily into the bathroom like a drunk person, it’s always like this, and it makes me get used to it. 

I went into the bathroom and saw my reflection in the mirror, who has messy long black hair, black eye bags, and a dull face like a lack of sleep. Yes, I was sleep-deprived thanks to a strange dream that never ended.  

“When will this nightmare end?” My hands were still shaking when I took the toothbrush, then put toothpaste on it. I started brushing my teeth and looking into what mistakes I had made until a handsome man approached me in such a dream, even though he had to die in my hands. 

My head weighing heavy, and my eyelids almost fell. The pain made me want to sleep again. I’m lucky that I’m used to all of this and don’t throw up like I used to.

“What did I do wrong to have a dream that felt so real? I failed to understand. Do I have to go to a psychiatrist, huh?” I sighed heavily. If I ever went to a psychiatrist, then I would doubt my mental health. I can still write calmly and use my logic. Could it be that if I don’t write again, that dream will never come again? Or should I switch sides and write a novel in another genre? 

🍁🍁🍁

Forty-five minutes later, after relaxing in the bath. I already feel somewhat calm from the gripping morning. My head is still a little heavy, but my body feels fresh, thanks to the foam that I prepared before taking a shower. 

As usual, I wear casual clothes because I will stay in the apartment only. After deciding to live alone and rent this apartment, it’s been one year, while my parents are in the village.

I went to the city to look for work; in fact, looking for a job was very difficult, especially for me, who only graduated from high school. At that time, my expectations were very high because I was tired of being in the village and meeting the same people every day.

I thought that after I went to town, got a job, and would meet new friends. I have visited various companies; no one is interested in my CV until I found a reading application that changed my life right now. 

The platform holds a writing competition. I try to get the ideas in my head when I feel bored while waiting for a job call. Three months of waiting while placing CVs in various companies still did not get results.  

I never imagined my writing would win that contest and become my money tree now. For one year, I worked on the first novel, and it has hundreds of chapters. Within a day, the number of readers in each chapter has exceeded the platform’s salary. My second novel is also booming like the previous novel, even though it only has 11 chapters.

After a nightmare, my stomach was hungry, and I had to get my breakfast.

“What should I cook for today? I’m so lazy.” 

I am lazily opening the refrigerator door, only to find three eggs inside. What could be more sickening than this morning?

“But why?” I grumbled irritably. “Dart, three eggs for one day? There’s no meat anyway, thanks to Sam. He ate everything in my refrigerator last night. An office worker instead of eating at someone’s house.” 

“Who did you say hitchhike?” 

I just spoke out without realizing Samuel Wijaya was standing at the entrance closing the door. Sometimes I forgot that he could walk into my apartment at will. I should change the password, so he can’t get in when I talked about him at the back. 

“You surprised me because I gave my apartment password doesn’t mean that you can trespass into my apartment.” I deliberately changed the conversation with a thick face so that he forgot I was grumbling behind his back. 

“Okay, I’m leaving, then.” 

“Eh?”

Samuel Wijaya came out of my apartment, but a moment later, the bell rang, and I heard Samuel's voice from outside asking me to open the door.

I forcefully opened the door and glared at him. “Sam, but why?”

🍁 Happy Reading 🍁

I was looking for something that seemed to disappear from my sight. — Red Maple