Pride & Prejudice is in the public domain; however, giving credit where credit is due, it is the work of the absolutely brilliant Jane Austen. Anything you recognize is hers, the rest is mine. I'm just taking the opportunity to shake things up a bit. Or rather take the good fortune and coincidence scattered throughout the work and cranking it up a notch or three.
Chapter 1
Luck is known to be a fickle creature appearing and disappearing at a whim, though there are those so-called fortune's favorites who seem permanently in her favor while others seem just as equally misfortune's favorites cursed with bad luck. But perception is a tricky thing; what may at first appear to be misfortune may in fact be just the luck someone needs and what may appear to be a lucky step may in fact be bad luck in deed. But that is luck, chaos personified.
Take the example of one George Wickham. The night before luck had been with him at cards, and he had celebrated quite liberally. So liberally, in fact, that he woke with his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth and a pounding headache made worse by the sunlight streaming into his room. It took him some time to get the nerve to sit up, and even then he had a struggle to pour out a cup of water from the pitcher at his bedside to try to remove at least the dry and fuzzy feeling. What time was it? It seemed awfully bright in his room. Lord, he hoped he had not missed the post coach. Surely, Denny would get him if it was getting late. He could not resent his losses at the card table that much.
Forcing himself to stand, he slowly moved to the window. God, it was bright outside. It took some time for him to be able to focus on anything, and he started cursing when the one thing he saw was the rear of the post coach as it disappeared from sight. Damn. That miserable cur had left him behind. Bloody poor loser. But why did not the maid fetch him? He was sure he told the saucy piece he was leaving on the coach. However, he had a sudden flash of memory from the previous evening—a fumbling attempt at a kiss and a sudden hard slap across the face. He wondered if it left a mark. Yet even if he had offended the wench, surely she would still see that he was informed if only to rid the inn of his company. Urgh, thinking was making his head hurt more, but he had to get moving if he was going to find his way to Mar... Mert... Meryton?— whatever the village was. It was important to get there today, especially since Denny had already promised to introduce him to the Colonel. He needed to make a decent impression in the beginning if he was going to smooth his way along.
By the time he made it downstairs, his head had managed to settle down to a dull throb. As it was quite late in the morning, all he could get for breakfast was some bread and cheese which took a good deal of chewing and did his head no favors. Then he had to negotiate for the rental of a nag of a horse in order to get on his way.
The road was miserable, and George Wickham's head pounded worse and worse with each step the nag took on the road, and the contents of the flask he carried did little to assuage the pain. How much further was it to the miserable village? Blast Denny! He convinced him to join the militia by raving about the opportunities a man in a red coat had, then abandoned him to make his way on his own. Wickham almost wanted to turn back and return to London; however, he still figured a uniform would improve his chances of charming his way into a fortune or at least into a long line of credit.
Lost in thoughts of what he would do once in the militia, he neglected to notice the flock of geese near the road way until they suddenly startled his horse throwing him off onto the muddy lane. Still half drunk and stunned by his fall into the mud, Wickham could only stare dumbly as his borrowed horse took off running.
"Damn, damn, damn," he muttered as the beast disappeared. A cacophony of honking assaulted his ears and before he could react, he was suddenly assaulted by the flock of geese who seemed offended by his presence. One particularly big bird went for his face biting his nose and cheeks before he could get his hand up. Scrambling to his feet, he struck wildly at the birds that attacked him with such ferocity, nipping at his legs and making him fear for his manhood if not his life. It was all he could do to get away from the angry birds, running until he was out of sight before vomiting at the side of the road while he tried to catch his breath, not a good combination.
~o~O~o~
Darcy stood outside the smithy feeling somewhat impatient. Bingley had been in such a rush to call on the Bennets, and then his horse threw a shoe just as they entered into Meryton. Fortunately, it was not far to the smith, though they had to wait a short time for the man to be free. Staring out at the village, Darcy was surprised to see the Bennet sisters emerging from a house not too far distant. They were accompanied by a tall heavyset man in black who seemed to be dividing his attention between Miss Elizabeth and Miss Mary.
"Well, that's that."
Darcy turned to where Bingley had emerged from the smithy.
"The smith is attending to my horse now," Bingley continued, "He tells me that he will be about an hour."
"Indeed?"
"Indeed." A smile spread across Bingley's face as he caught sight of the Bennets. "I dare say we shall have to find a way to divert ourselves until my horse is ready." He cast a meaningful glance at Darcy, leaving no doubt of his intention.
Darcy had been telling himself that he was indifferent to Miss Elizabeth but when Bingley insisted on going to the greet the group, Darcy chose to not protest. "By all means, let us," he said and motioned for his friend to lead the way.
"Good, good," Bingley chirped.
As they started across the way, Darcy couldn't help keeping his gaze fixed on Miss Elizabeth.
Indeed.
~o~O~o~
Normally a great walker, Elizabeth Bennet had found the walk into Meryton tedious at best. The tedium had been only slightly lessened when she had managed to convince Mary to join them. Already having had enough of Mr. Collins' civilities and starting to become wary of an increased number of them being directed specifically towards her, she had pressed her sister after noticing that Mary seemed less annoyed with Mr. Collins than anyone else. It had not been too difficult to do so, which allayed Elizabeth's conscience just a little, as she felt somewhat selfish in her desire to escape dealing with her cousin, especially when Mary managed to turn Mr. Collins conversation away from her and seemed genuinely interested in the exercise. She managed to distance herself even more once they entered Aunt Philips' house.
The visit did not last long as both Lydia and Kitty were wild to see if Denny had returned as they had not spotted him on the way into Meryton. Reluctantly Elizabeth followed, if only to try to keep her sisters from behaving too badly in their search for redcoats. She did not know whether to be pleased or resigned that they spotted Denny almost immediately as he was walking up the street.
As they stood there exchanging commonplace pleasantries, Elizabeth was surprised to see Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy approaching from the direction of the blacksmith. For Jane's sake she was pleased, though it gave her little pleasure to meet the dark and disapproving stare of Mr. Darcy. Nor did it give her any greater pleasure to introduce her cousin to the man and witness Mr. Collins' voluble effusions when he realized that Mr. Darcy was the nephew of his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh. After having been inundated with descriptions of the great lady since her cousin's arrival, Elizabeth felt that she should have realized the relationship from reports of her character alone.
There was some relief in the fact that Mr. Darcy while haughty was being reasonably polite in the face Mr. Collins' sycophantic behavior, and she endeavored in her own way to try to extract him from the conversation when something caught her eye. Turning her head she saw with some surprise a riderless horse walking casually into the village, stopping idly by one of the first buildings it reached.
"How strange, Mr. Darcy," Elizabeth said, as she noticed his eye also caught by the sight.
"Very," he said impassively.
"Whatever do you suppose happened to its rider?" Elizabeth asked almost absently as she looked at the rather relaxed creature.
~o~O~o~
Battered, bruised, and muddy, Wickham continued his journey on foot. When would he get to a blasted town? As he trudged along he saw a small brown dog ahead of him. Not another animal! He threw some rocks at the beast, who growled but ran off. Feeling a sense of triumph at that, Wickham continued along for a little before discovering to his relief that he was near the outskirts of a village. He must have been nearer to Meryton than he realized.
For a few moments, he tried brushing the mud off his clothes before giving up and continuing to limp the rest of the way. Perhaps he could say he had been attacked by highwaymen. That would be a good tale, especially once he could get into uniform. He had started working out the details of his bravery in the face of overwhelming odds wondering whether or not to include a damsel in distress, when he spotted his hired nag standing peacefully as if it had not a care in the world. Stupid animal. He started heading toward the beast when he was stopped by the sight of a small crowd down the street wherein his erstwhile friend Denny was laughing and talking with a couple of young ladies who seemed to be hanging on his every word.
No wonder he was in such a hurry to get back, Wickham thought bitterly. It took him a moment to look beyond Denny and notice the gentlemen on the outer edges of the group. Two were unfamiliar, but the third he knew all too well. Darcy! Damn and blast, what is he doing here? Wickham wondered if he could slip out of sight before the man spotted him. He had no idea what Darcy might do if they met, but he had no intention of letting Darcy see him in his bedraggled state.
He started to slink towards a nearby building when out of nowhere he heard a fierce yapping and a furry object launched itself at him. As he twisted, he could feel something grab at his breeches and heard a ripping sound. That damned dog again. Lashing out at the animal that attacked him, he lost his balance and managed to fall face first into a pile of fresh horse droppings, deposited by the ungrateful rented nag. Angrily he got to his feet, a stream of profanities pouring from his lips. He could see Denny openly laughing at him along with the two girls he had been speaking with, while Darcy regarded him with open derision.
George Wickham was a gambler who liked to take chances; the few times they paid off were enough to keep him going, but he was also a man who believed in luck, good and bad. And the bad luck that plagued him that day, most especially the bad luck of Darcy seeing him in such a state, was enough to convince him that Meryton was not the place for him. He grabbed the reins of his wayward horse and with a futile attempt at dignity struggled into the saddle and turned to head back the way he came. Now that he had his saddle bags back, he would try cleaning himself up if he could find a convenient stream. He remembered Lucy Younge telling him of a rich widow with no family who might be susceptible to the charms of the right young man. Once his bruises healed, he might just try his hand, since vulnerable young heiresses were harder to come by. Yes, that was a better plan. Meryton could go to blazes, and Darcy was welcome to it. He was probably miserable there anyway.
~o~O~o~
"Mr. Darcy, are you smiling?" Elizabeth Bennet asked in astonishment. She had moved nearer to him almost involuntarily, as Mr. Collins was in the midst of a harangue on the ungentlemanly language of the man who had been the center of the recent spectacle. Only Mary was paying attention, but Mr. Bingley and Mr. Denny were unfortunately too close to actively ignore him.
"I really could not say, Miss Elizabeth," Darcy said, as he attempted to control his urge to laugh at the image of George Wickham, covered in horse leavings, his torn breeches exposing his undergarments to the world (though he was grateful the man had some on so that the ladies would not be exposed to the man's bared buttocks). "But it seems if I am, I am not the only one." She had been repressing a laugh herself; he could tell. He was finding himself more entranced with her with every moment he spent in her company.
"I have already admitted that follies do divert me, though it seems rather cruel to laugh at such a spectacle," Elizabeth said.
"But not to be amused," Darcy said. "I would say that gentleman does not require much sympathy."
"I would say that I agree, especially since I have never known that dog to attack anyone unprovoked, but if I did, that would be shockingly unladylike, would it not?" Elizabeth said with just the slightest sly smile. "And I think we have all received enough shocks today."
He studied her expression for a moment. He thought about how she became more fascinating with every encounter and found himself looking forward to their next meeting and what she might say or do to intrigue him further.
"Indeed," Darcy replied. "Enough shocks."
A week later, on the morning of the day of the Netherfield Ball, Darcy rose from his bed. It seemed pointless to continue to try to sleep when all he had was restless dreams involving the entrancing Elizabeth Bennet. Confused and jumbled dreams where there had been moments of him married to her and happy as well as married to her and scorned and ridiculed, mixed with images of her hair down blowing in the wind. surrounding them, enmeshing them, as he kissed her, leaving him frustrated and miserably entangled in his sheets when he awoke.All his attempts to put her from his mind seemed doomed to failure. Not even reflecting on the unsuitability of her family connections did more than make him reflect on her own personal virtues. No, he would soon need to either flee or surrender, and flight seemed like abject cowardice and surrender seemed...In actuality he could not determine if surrender would be more pleasurable or painful.
Mr. Jones came and went after informing them that Mrs. Bennet did not seem ill beyond a strained larynx and that she should try refraining from speaking for at least a day or two to give it time to heal. It was welcome news in more way than one to Elizabeth though she would never say out loud that it would be a pleasure to not fear her mother's tendency to indiscreet pronouncements to wreck Jane's chances with Mr. Bingley. If she had thoughts of Mr. Darcy, she quickly repressed them; there was no point on dwelling on the man. If she could not retain her dislike, she would at least strive for indifference.Having expressed her relief that her mother was not seriously ill, Elizabeth was unpleasantly surprised to hear that she still intended to go to the ball."But, mother, would it not be better to rest and recuperate?" Elizabeth asked.Mrs. Bennet shook her head vigorously and made it clear by gestures and a
Once past the receiving line at Netherfield, Elizabeth looked around for Charlotte Lucas, whom she had not seen for a week. That she also might be looking to see Mr. Darcy, who was tall enough that it should have been easy enough to spot him, as well, she would most firmly deny. As it was, the familiar company meant her progress through the room was slow as she was greeted by many of her neighbors, among the first being Jonathan Martin who asked her for the first dance as his sister was engaged with her betrothed. She had to repress a smile at his method of asking, but she was pleased to find a partner for the first dance so quickly.After a few more encounters and another dance invitation, Elizabeth spotted Charlotte and was surprised to see her talking with Mary who somehow had maneuvered through the crowd ahead of her. She was equally surprised not to see Mr. Collins by her side, as it had seemed as if he planned to be glued to her side for the
The day after the Netherfield Ball found Mr. Collins solidly determined to come to the point of proposing after what he saw as a very successful evening, though he did feel some concern about Mrs. Bennet's indisposition, but considering that it had not kept her from attending the ball the previous evening felt that it should be no impediment to his cause. He felt it most fortunate to find Mr. Bennet along with Mary and Elizabeth together shortly after breakfast."May I hope, sir, for your interest with your fair daughter Mary, when I solicit for the honor of a private audience with her in the course of this morning?" Then thinking that that might not be the proper way to go about this added. "Or perhaps I should speak with you first, sir, in order to reassure you as to my honorable intentions and reasons for requesting such an interview."Mr. Bennet quirked an eyebrow at the man. "I think I can safely infer the topic and reserv
Courting a Good OpinionGeorge Wickham lay low for nearly two weeks until all his obvious bruises healed, though he had spoken with Mrs. Younge soon after he arrived in town. She had assured him that Maria Montcraven was still free and looking for a handsome young husband. She even assured him that she could procure him an invitation to a ball that Mrs. Montcraven intended to attend in three weeks time. Happily, he had enough funds (probably because he had been too busy hiding to gamble it away) to procure a truly fine suit of clothes for the evening as his preferred tailor would no longer extend him credit. However, he knew that he needed to make a good impression and as he could not cut a dash in a red uniform, he would be assured that what he did wear would be well-tailored and striking.The night of the ball he went over all the information Mrs. Younge had given him on the widow, her likes and dislikes, her appearance, how
Begging the QuestionElizabeth was determined not to be maudlin during the absence of Mr. Darcy. After all, two months ago, she did not even know of his existence and not even a month ago, she thought him the proudest, most disagreeable man in the world. Simply because she found herself changing her opinions rather completely on the gentleman, that was no reason for her to feel so listless without him near. Nor was there any need for her to retreat to windows when she could not escape to the outside. Nor count the days until his likely reappearance. No, she was a rational girl. She always had been and had no desire to become overcome with sensibility for so pitiful a reason.And there was no reason for her to overly dwell upon either the letter she had written immediately after the Netherfield Ball to Mrs. Gardiner asking her to if she knew anything about Mr. Darcy and his reputation in either Lambton or London or the reply she
Answering the QuestionElizabeth had been almost relieved to return home the next day, as after a restless night, she found herself rather discomposed around Darcy. Everything about him seemed so much sharper in contrast. Even the smallest smile seemed to make her want to blush. She wanted just a little distance to be able to regain some equanimity in her dealings with him. However, while when she was with him she found it hard to think rationally, when she was away from him it seemed almost impossible to think about anything other than him.Of course, coming home to more of her mother's flutterings about Mary's wedding, did nothing to turn her thoughts away from Mr. Darcy and his proposal, and as she considered her answer, she was struck with a sudden concern about how Mary might be affected by another of her sisters getting engaged so close to her own wedding. Mary had been too often overlooked by her family, and right now wi
Good Fortune for Some"I still cannot believe you proposed so soon, Darcy," Bingley said."So you have said, Bingley," Darcy said, wearily. "Multiple times. I do not see why you are still harping on it, nor why you have not proposed to Miss Bennet if you are still so determined.""She will not let me!" Bingley exclaimed."Why ever not?" Darcy asked. "Moreover how could you know if she would or would not if you have not posed the question?""I asked!" Bingley said, before his expression changed and he qualified his statement "Well, hinted. It was after your engagement was announced— one of those days when you were off walking with Miss Elizabeth; frankly I have no idea how you two can enjoy walking in the cold the way you do..."Darcy could feel himself flush as he knew the primary draw of those cold walks was the opportunity to be alone with his betroth
Note.Here we come to the end of the tale, and this is the first time I've ever written an epilogue with such a time jump, though this is probably the most I will jump as I prefer to leave my happy couples still in their relative youth, so I'm never going to write of them being grandparents or their deaths. Uh-uh, no way. They are immortal. And I know that there are those who really dislike epilogues and that's their privilege. I did try making this a little more than just a recitation of children and people's fates, even if there was a bit of that.Hopefully, the various meetings at this ball interwoven with what are basically infodumps were entertaining at least. Charlotte's fate actually was a late change that happened when I was working on the dinner with Darcy's relatives. When Miss Graves suddenly asked Elizabeth if she truly wished to marry and that she was looking for a sensible woman to be her heir, that'
Ten Years LaterIt was yet another ball of the Gordons, this one in honor of the engagement of one of their nieces. George never could remember their names, and it seemed too much of a bother to. He would make his bow and escape to the punch bowl and the card room soon enough, as his dancing days seemed done, what with the gout he tended to suffer. Not that the ladies were clamoring for his attentions any more. Time had expanded his waistline and receded his hair line to the point that he wished that wigs were still in fashion. Prosperity had its drawbacks as well its blessings.He just wanted to get past the receiving line so he could go his own way, and let Maria, who for some time had been bored enough with him to not care whether he spent his time in his club or a brothel (not that he had enough libidinous interest at the moment to even bother with the latter), pick over the latest bunch of young libertines to find a compan
Taking the Trouble to Practice.Having made his way past the hosts and a good many of Maria's "close" friends, George found himself looking longingly at the punch bowl and then at the reason why he both wanted to be at the bowl and was not allowed. He glanced around at the assembled throng attending Lord and Lady Gordon's ball, wishing he could feel a thrill at being among such illustrious personages; at one time he would have seen it as a great opportunity, but now it was rather losing its luster."Do not slouch, George," Maria's superior tone made him flinch."No, dearest," he said dutifully."Remember, you are now my husband and a Montcraven; use your charms wisely.""Yes, dearest," he muttered agreeably, while inwardly cursing Lucy Younge for putting him in the path of Maria Montcraven. He could not believe that she had still been angry about Ramsgate. It had be
Luck is Sometimes Even Less of a LadyFitzwilliam Darcy, husband for a mere two weeks, reluctantly left his currently quite delightfully disheveled wife in order to let her begin her preparations for the ball they would be attending that evening, the first social engagement where they would appear as man and wife. While he hardly wished to emerge from the blissful haven of their home as yet, he did unfortunately recognize that he could no longer ignore the outside world, especially Lord and Lady Gordon who had been close friends to his own parents and who had made such a point of inviting him and Elizabeth to their ball. Of course he realized that he and Elizabeth were currently of high interest because of either the perceived disparity of the match or the fact that while the ton were familiar enough with the Darcys of Pemberley, they had never heard of the Bennets of Longbourn, thus making the former Elizabeth Bennet very much an unknown quality.
Good Fortune for Some"I still cannot believe you proposed so soon, Darcy," Bingley said."So you have said, Bingley," Darcy said, wearily. "Multiple times. I do not see why you are still harping on it, nor why you have not proposed to Miss Bennet if you are still so determined.""She will not let me!" Bingley exclaimed."Why ever not?" Darcy asked. "Moreover how could you know if she would or would not if you have not posed the question?""I asked!" Bingley said, before his expression changed and he qualified his statement "Well, hinted. It was after your engagement was announced— one of those days when you were off walking with Miss Elizabeth; frankly I have no idea how you two can enjoy walking in the cold the way you do..."Darcy could feel himself flush as he knew the primary draw of those cold walks was the opportunity to be alone with his betroth
Answering the QuestionElizabeth had been almost relieved to return home the next day, as after a restless night, she found herself rather discomposed around Darcy. Everything about him seemed so much sharper in contrast. Even the smallest smile seemed to make her want to blush. She wanted just a little distance to be able to regain some equanimity in her dealings with him. However, while when she was with him she found it hard to think rationally, when she was away from him it seemed almost impossible to think about anything other than him.Of course, coming home to more of her mother's flutterings about Mary's wedding, did nothing to turn her thoughts away from Mr. Darcy and his proposal, and as she considered her answer, she was struck with a sudden concern about how Mary might be affected by another of her sisters getting engaged so close to her own wedding. Mary had been too often overlooked by her family, and right now wi
Begging the QuestionElizabeth was determined not to be maudlin during the absence of Mr. Darcy. After all, two months ago, she did not even know of his existence and not even a month ago, she thought him the proudest, most disagreeable man in the world. Simply because she found herself changing her opinions rather completely on the gentleman, that was no reason for her to feel so listless without him near. Nor was there any need for her to retreat to windows when she could not escape to the outside. Nor count the days until his likely reappearance. No, she was a rational girl. She always had been and had no desire to become overcome with sensibility for so pitiful a reason.And there was no reason for her to overly dwell upon either the letter she had written immediately after the Netherfield Ball to Mrs. Gardiner asking her to if she knew anything about Mr. Darcy and his reputation in either Lambton or London or the reply she
Courting a Good OpinionGeorge Wickham lay low for nearly two weeks until all his obvious bruises healed, though he had spoken with Mrs. Younge soon after he arrived in town. She had assured him that Maria Montcraven was still free and looking for a handsome young husband. She even assured him that she could procure him an invitation to a ball that Mrs. Montcraven intended to attend in three weeks time. Happily, he had enough funds (probably because he had been too busy hiding to gamble it away) to procure a truly fine suit of clothes for the evening as his preferred tailor would no longer extend him credit. However, he knew that he needed to make a good impression and as he could not cut a dash in a red uniform, he would be assured that what he did wear would be well-tailored and striking.The night of the ball he went over all the information Mrs. Younge had given him on the widow, her likes and dislikes, her appearance, how
The day after the Netherfield Ball found Mr. Collins solidly determined to come to the point of proposing after what he saw as a very successful evening, though he did feel some concern about Mrs. Bennet's indisposition, but considering that it had not kept her from attending the ball the previous evening felt that it should be no impediment to his cause. He felt it most fortunate to find Mr. Bennet along with Mary and Elizabeth together shortly after breakfast."May I hope, sir, for your interest with your fair daughter Mary, when I solicit for the honor of a private audience with her in the course of this morning?" Then thinking that that might not be the proper way to go about this added. "Or perhaps I should speak with you first, sir, in order to reassure you as to my honorable intentions and reasons for requesting such an interview."Mr. Bennet quirked an eyebrow at the man. "I think I can safely infer the topic and reserv