A Real 180

MEGAN

Crash and burn. That’s how I see my life today.

HIS REJECTION did a number on me and had caused me physical pain. No one ever rejected me. In fact, men mostly wanted to stick their dick in me. That was a little bit harsh, but that was the exact truth. I mean, I never pushed myself to anyone just to get their attention, but my bravado did not affect Forrest.

I admired his self-control, which pissed me off at the same time. And he kissed my forehead. He. Kissed. Me. On. My. Freaking. Forehead. Did I look like his freaking grandma?

“Hey! Look at you. So fucking hot!” My gay classmate, Jonas, gushed as he dragged me toward the crowd. I was surprised to see him here, but I was kind of glad he came all by himself.

“So do you. Are you single?” Adrenaline rushed through us as we danced to the new song.

“Yup but not ready to mingle.” He placed his hands on my hips, and I raised mine in the air and swayed along with him. “I missed college days, Meg.”

“Me too. I’m kinda frustrated about this guy right now.”

“You? Frustrated? How come? I can’t see you in those circumstances. He should be lucky that he gets your attention.”

“There’s always a first for everything.”

“I guess so. So what’s so special about him?”

“I think I got all his bad luck. I mean, if you’ve seen him, he looks so freaking hot. Many women wanted to hook up with him, but he turned them down. Sometimes I thought he’s so loyal to his wife if he’s married and has a family somewhere, or he prefers dick than vagina!”

He barked into laughter. “I would definitely do him because we have the same taste in men, but let’s forget this mystery guy for a while, shall we? I love this song!”

I collapsed onto the sofa in frustration. I might have misjudged his gestures. Of course, I did. He saved and came to me to clear out his guilt. Because of him, that suckass Asher took his revenge on poor me. That was what Forrest had been doing all this time.

I groaned to myself. I should be pulling off that big girl pants and searching for a job and not trying to flirt with Forrest because he is certainly not into me. He should have done that a long time ago if he ever did. The ship had sailed.

I felt like a desperate bitch.

My phone vibrated. Lately, I felt excited when it did because no one had ever tried to remember calling me at this time. When I looked at the screen, it was not who I expected it to be.

FORREST:

Did you get home safe?

I rolled my eyes before I typed my reply.

NO. Why do you even care? I was dragged by a gargantuan spider in the alley, bit me, and imprisoned me with its gross and sticky web. Now, I’m dying. Lonely. And it’s all because of you.

I erased it because it sounded bitter. So self-righteous of him. I was even surprised that he wasted his precious time checking on me. I betted he couldn’t sleep tonight if he wouldn’t do that.

Finally, I sent a reply. Hopefully, he would sense my sarcasm. But Forrest was Forrest. He had thick-skinned.

Me: Are you getting softie on me now, Forrest?

Forrest: Are you home?

Jeez, he’s annoying. I could even feel him groaning.

Me: Yes, dad.

Forrest: Good.

My brow arched. That’s it? Playing hard to get, I see.

I wore my shorts and my tank top and went to bed. I tucked my blanket under my chin, feeling down after replaying his rejection all over again. This was all my fault why I was alone. I pushed all men who wanted more than just sex with me. I thought that was their way to have free sex. That was what mostly they wanted, though. So I preferred just hook-ups. Now, I was left alone. Still, a commitment-phobic, emotionally unavailable cold bitch might have been forgotten by friends for good.

The moment I closed my eyes, the hot, broody Forrest was like a sledgehammer to my gut. Visions of his strong arms wrapped around me, his soft and cigarette smelled lips pressed against my forehead started to assault my mind. I was usually turned off by men who smoked. With him, I didn’t give a damn. I thought he was sexy smoking. Sometimes, I wondered the reason behind it. He was just mysterious that no one got into him.

I felt pathetic.

I opened my eyes again and groaned. Forrest didn’t like me. He might have thought he was a pawn to my sexual exploits. Well, Forrest was hot and sexy. I thought of him often if he looked hotter naked, if he was good with his mouth, his tongue, or if he was well-hung. Of course, he was. He didn’t have to show it off. I was sure he fucked hard because, judging by the way he looked, he didn’t seem to go easy on women when it came to sex. Excellent judgment, Megan. You’re way more pathetic right now.

I closed my eyes again and pulled the blanket above my head. This was going nowhere. I needed to sleep and forgot him for good.

Heat enveloped my body. My lust over him consumed and controlled me entirely. I shoved my hand into my shorts rubbed my clit as I thought of the dark eyes looking down on me. I lost control. I moved my finger in a circular motion.

We started to breathe heavily, and I could sense the sexual tension ricocheting between us, filling the room.

My heart started to pound as I imagined his strong muscles pumping his erect, thick, and taut length as we moved in rhythm. He was watching me like a hawk to its prey all the time as I fingered myself.

I was instantly wet slicked, and my clit became more sensitive. I continued rubbing my hardened nub and bit my lip to stifle my moan, but my muscles were quivering everywhere, and I was writhing with intense pleasure.

“Don’t stop.” Soon he groaned, and I quickened my finger. His stare glued at me. His eyes were burning with lust and desires, sending a ball of inferno racing through me.

I felt like my lungs were running out of oxygen as I continued pumping my finger in and out of my soaked pussy as if I couldn’t help myself, and I would lose my mind if I stopped.

“Oh god.” My heart went overdrive. My hips backed. I threw my head back against the pillow, quickly consumed by my pending orgasm and his presence.

“Look at me, Megan.” Forrest was pumping faster, sweat breaking across his forehead. Muscles were straining and clenching on his arms. He was breathing through his nose, but he kept his searing gaze on me as we were determined to fall into the abyss of bliss together.

I inhaled sharply, violently shaking as I succumbed to the strongest orgasm I had never felt before.

***

I woke up to the constant ringing of my phone.

Still half-asleep, I answered, “Hello.”

“Ms. Simons?” I remembered her voice—the HR officer from Hitchcliff Associates.

“Yes, it’s me. Just Megan, please? Tell me it’s good news?” I was already sitting on my bed, literally grinning.

She sighed. “Megan, I’m sorry, but we found someone who fits for the position...”

I thought I felt numb. I couldn’t remember hanging up the call. When would this despair be over? I had only one choice left for the meantime. It was time to throw away my pride.

“Is the job offer still stand?” I asked my mother over the phone.

“Of course, Meggie. I am only waiting for your call,” Mom replied immediately. “You can come over this afternoon so that Beth can fill you in. She’s been having back pain for two days now.”

“I’ll be there. Thanks.”

“Meg, how about dinner?”

“Mom—”

“I understand, honey.”

I closed my eyes as I felt her disappointment. Every time I saw Mom, she only reminded me of the awful things I’d done to our family. Those were the only things I couldn’t forget, maybe because I hadn’t forgiven myself.

In the afternoon, I reported early to impress. This might not be permanent, but I had bills to pay.

“Here are the lists of patients for appointments. Dr. Reed should be free by this time. Her lunch break. VIP patients’ appointments are according to their free time as long as they won’t overlap with regular patients. You wouldn’t have problems anyway. They prefer at night.” Pregnant Beth tapped the calendar on the tablet as I rechecked the schedule on the desktop. “I used to take note, just in case.”

“I will do the same.” I smiled at her.

“Great.” She showed me her landline and her personal numbers saved on the Contact. “Here’s my number if you want to inquire something.”

“Thanks, but you better prepare to be a mom. Is this your first?” I rubbed her huge belly.

She propped her hands at her back and grimaced. “My third.”

My eyes widened in surprise, causing her to laugh at my reaction.

“I hope you’ll have kids someday. It feels amazing, Megan.”

Her words made me swallow. “Maybe one day.”

Once Beth was gone, I checked through the schedule, which patients were on the timetable. Terrible things happened, my views on marriage changed. I thought relationships loving someone would just bring pain and misery.

I picked up the phone when it rang. “Dr. Diana Reed Clinic, good afternoon.”

“Hi, good afternoon. Can I have an appointment at the same time?”

“Your name please?” I grabbed the pen and the note Beth gave me earlier.

“You must be new.”

“Yes. I am. Wish me luck, and this is my first day.”

“Is Beth okay?”

“She’s okay but took an early leave. Your name, mister?”

“Forrest Wood.”

I froze and trembled. I might have gasped. My hand gripped tightly around the phone handle as I thought of what to answer. How could I not recognize his voice instantly? I caught my lip between my teeth to prevent myself from telling him who I was.

“Hello?”

“Yes. Yes. Um—” Am I gonna tell him who I am or not?

“Sorry, you’re new. I used to have an eleven a.m appointment with Dr. Reed.”

“Right. Tomorrow at eleven, Mr. Wood.” I screwed my face. Calling him Mr. Wood didn’t feel right, but I should get used to him being my mom’s patient. How would he react when he saw me tomorrow morning? Oh god! He was right. Our world was getting smaller for the two of us.

“Thanks. Bye.”

There were two more calls for appointments I listed. Before I could turn off the desktop, my mother walked out of her room.

“Meg, just email me the list, okay?”

I met her gaze, and she looked tired. “Are you okay, Mom?”

She forced a smile, but she still looked beautiful and looked professional in her outfit. “I took a painkiller. It’s just a headache. So how’s your first day?”

“Fast?” I smiled. “Thanks for giving me this job.”

“I’m glad you accepted it. We may not be able to talk frequently. At least I know you are just right outside this door.”

“Maybe we can have lunch together sometimes?”

“I would love that, Meggie.” Mom touched my face. I leaned on her hand and felt it.

Three years since the last time we had this kind of talk. Since I walked out of her home for goodbye, I never visited her, even holidays. We exchanged gifts, but she respected my decisions about not seeing each other until I was ready.

“Looking forward.” I gripped her hand, and I didn’t realize how much I missed it.

“You should go now.” She laughed softly.

“Yeah. For my first day, I got a little excited.” I grabbed my bag. “Um, Mom?”

“Yes?” She wore her coat.

I realized I couldn’t ask her. “Nothing. Just take care.”

“You, too, Meggie.”

***

I ended up eating instant noodles for my dinner. Then I collapsed to my couch to watch a rerun when my phone vibrated. I was startled in my seat to see the caller ID on my screen. I wanted to beam and cringe at the same time when I remembered about his call this afternoon. Nevertheless, he would find out tomorrow.

“Forrest?”

“Did you find a job?”

“Good evening.” I smiled.

“Sorry. Evening.”

“Yes. A temporary until I find a permanent one. Why? Are you gonna hire me to be your housemaid?”

“What is your last job?”

“What job can you offer? I can be a belly dancer. I was in a dance club in high school. I’m good at pool dancing. I can be a stripper or your servant. Oh, I can make an excellent omelet without burning the whole house.” I laughed, and I didn’t know why.

“Jesus, Megan.” I could feel he was clenching his jaw on the other line.

“You hurt my ego, Forrest. Then I realized you’re just trying to get rid of your guilt. So are you gonna offer me a job? Don’t you think nepotism would ruin your holier-than-thou self?” There was a moment of silence between us, and I couldn’t open my mouth to talk anymore.

“What do you want from me, Megan?”

A violent rush of anger filled my veins. I drew a bracing breath before I answered. “Fuck you! Fuck your kindness! You are the one who messed up with that man in the bar and provoked him to come after me. I even protected your good reputation from him. You were the one who came to the parking lot and saved me from the passing car, which I never told you to save my ass. You didn’t turn me down when I invited you for breakfast. You came to my apartment with pizza and spent dinner with me. You even watched the sappiest movie and never complained. Last night you kissed me and sent me a text asking if I got home safe.”

“Megan—”

“No. You fucking shut up when I’m talking. I’m done being nice with your temperamental and assholishness attitude. Now, you tell me, Forrest, why all of a sudden you see me? Aside from my sparkling personality and my miserable life, what is it that you want from me?”

“Meg—”

“A little advice from a friend, Forrest. Stay away from me. Maybe you should stick back your head in your ass.”