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Chapter 12
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Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 13
The car ride home is devoid of conversation; neither of us speaks. I know that this peace will end as soon as we get home.I don't think Zach will let this go easily, and I won't let it go, either. Why will I feel guilty? I have never done anything wrong.If going into that bar and finding out who he was by accident is my fault, then Zach hiding his identity from me is much worse.I never wanted to find out about this, to begin with. I sighed. I knew that I was only brave in my head and that when I was actually facing him, all my courage would vanish like smoke.It is already the middle of the night, and the entire house is silent. My husband walks silently to our room, and I do the same. The quiet atmosphere makes me feel even more nervous.I'd rather he yell at me than give me the cold shoulder, which I can't stand.Zach went straight to our bedroom, and I stood at the door and watched as he took his clothes off without showing any emotion. There were still spots of blood on his sui
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 14
I lowered my voice and felt a little bad because I knew I didn't really believe Zach. But it also seemed wrong to doubt him because of it.Just what he said about how much I hate that man doesn't match what I sensed from him before. If I hate him as much as Zach claims, why do I not hate him subconsciously but instead blindly follow him?"You don't believe me. I can see it in your eyes," he scowls, his expression darkening to the point where I almost suffocate from the intensity. His eyes are drooping slightly, and he is staring at me dangerously.I shake my head, terrified by this expression of his that he never used on me, even when our marriage was falling apart."No, I believe you..." my voice trembling as I try to reach out to him, my mind becoming even more jumbled and the pain in my head intensifying. "I really believe you, yes, I...I do hate him..." continuing and becoming pathetic, the courage within me vanishes like smoke once more.He dodged my hand and took a step back fro
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 15
Perhaps I dreamed of something like that because what happened last night was still fresh in my mind. And that boy with green eyes... I shook my head and sat in bed, remaining motionless.And because of how I met him, the image of that guy manifested in my dream. The stranger... Rizzo, which I believe is his surname rather than his real name because he always called Zach by his surname as well. They had a habit of calling each other by their surnames, which I'm not sure is the norm in their world.Wait, my thoughts were cut short, and realization struck me once more. Memories of what happened the night before surface like a flood in my mind. It's real, and everything really happened.It's my new reality. My husband is a part of that dangerous world, which means I will be as well from now on. I sighed and gathered my thoughts. Since it's here already, I can just accept it. There are many more things I need to think about than Zach being a mafia boss or something like that, if that is w
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 16
“Why?” That's all I can say without my voice choking me. I'm curious about this because, I don't know when, but every time I look at our memories together, I get this nagging feeling that something isn't right. Or it is just me because my act is now beginning to influence my mind.I don't want to be suspicious of him or make our already bad relationship even worse. Having doubts will only increase the chances that Zach will leave me. I always get scared when I think about this as if not having Zach in my life will kill me.Perhaps he is right. That I'm obsessed with him, but I can't help it. I know I'm crazy, but I can't stop.He looks at me with a dark expression but says nothing."Do you really don't remember anything?" Zach asked me this question instead of answering and going on with what he was saying.His blue eyes never left my face for a second. My heart is racing, but I don't let my face show how surprised I am. I just nodded at him in response. I don't even know what words w
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 17
As we walk through the hall, the solemn atmosphere grows more intense, becoming almost gloomy and dark. It reminded me of the time when I walked into that bar not knowing what was going to happen; now, because of it, I have an idea of what party this is.I lift my head and look at Zach next to me. He hasn't said anything since we got in the car as if he has a lot on his mind. Even the bodyguards around us look wary of their surroundings as if they are on guard for something.Zach may have noticed my gaze as he looked at me, and he stopped, prompting me to do the same. Even with a mask covering half of his features and only his lips showing, the shadow outlined his handsome face, and his blue eyes appeared darker than usual, filled with deep thoughts.Zach never gave me a chance to ask him why he brought me here when he told me to forget about it and that I had nothing to do with it. From the atmosphere, I can tell this party isn't simple at all.But I know that even without asking him
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 18
I raise my head, and the eyes around us become even more visible, and they appear to have no intention of hiding their gazes.My breath caught in my throat as I looked at the man who stood upright and confidently in front of our table. When I look at him, our eyes meet, and the grin on his face widens. Even with the mask that conceals his identity, I can immediately tell who he is, especially when those intimidating green eyes look directly into my eyes.The man who introduced me to the world. The man who started all of my confusion. Rizzo, Zach’s enemy.I turn away from him and look at Zach, and I notice his expression darkening in an instant, in stark contrast to Rizzo's. He is the only one who can change Zach's face this much out of everyone who comes to our table.“I’m sorry that I’m a bit late to the party. Something came up that I had to take care of first.” His deep voice rang, and while he appeared to be explaining something, his tone suggested otherwise.He doesn't appear to
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 19
The men are becoming more cautious of their surroundings with each passing second, and as I look around, I notice that not only on our side but also on the security of the other guests.Since Rizzo left, it has already been like this. It had been a few minutes, and I hadn't seen him again. He might have already gone home, or, as Zach said, he might be planning something I don't know about.The pressure rises even more as someone approaches Zach and whispers something to him that I can’t hear. But when I look at his face, I see a change that is so scary that he breaks the glass he is holding with his own hands.“Zach!” I immediately reacted and held his hand, which was already bleeding. "What are you doing?" I yell, feeling a little upset about what he did.However, as I lift my head again, our eyes meet. I went stiff, surprised by the way he was looking at me. It's not with fierce eyes, but something more frightening. A look that I never thought Zach would give me.I can't even react
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 20
“A substitute?” I can't help but ask him, and he responds immediately."Hmm, a substitute," Rizzo says with a nod. "Gallagher uses a substitute for you, and uses the darkness to hide you in the crowd," he confirms, continuing to fill in the gaps of information for me. “While they both went out thinking we’ll chase them while someone will hide you from me.” He continued as the stunned expression on my face widened; I hadn't even considered it in this light.I’m still processing this as Rizzo's voice reverberated again, and he even clapped this time. He's clapping, and the amused grin on his face has reached his eyes, giving me a sense of familiarity as I look at him.“A good plan, indeed. Almost perfect, even.” he stopped his hand and said, with a sly glint in his eyes, "But it won't work on me. Gallagher miscalculated this time. I wonder how his face is right now.”So, ever since we went to that party, Zach has had this plan in place in case Rizzo ever comes looking for me. And he did
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Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 37
It started that day. I feel guilty, but the interval between when I go insane is getting longer and longer. And using the counteractive drug won’t help me much anymore, or it will make my condition much worse. "Clive," I mumbled amidst the dim light of my room. I’m lying in bed while he sits in bed beside me. I can’t see most of his expressions, but his side profile is deeply reflected in my pupils. He lowered his gaze and hummed in his baritone voice. "What is it?" he asked carefully.For some reason, it makes me think that I’m fragile and that any wrong word or move can trigger that madness within me. I hate this, but it's only in this rare moment when I’m sober that I can have a conversation with him. "Something is wrong with me," I say with much certainty. I’m not dumb. I know that there is something horribly wrong with me. I want to accuse anyone, but it makes me wonder why. Why is this happening? Am I truly insane? or some kind of substance within me? I don’t know. Clive t
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 36
As I calmed down, it gradually became clear in my mind that the memories of when I suddenly lost myself had flooded in. The fear that is sprouting in my mind completely resides within me. It’s like, I already know that something is wrong, but for some inexplicable reason, I don’t want to admit it either. The conflicting reasons are making it even harder for me to assess the situation. "Clive," I call his name, as his hand slides down from my eyes, and yet my eyes remain closed. "What is it?" he asked in a soothing voice, as though afraid to agitate my emotions again. A bitter smile emerges from my lips, and I’m aware that what I did earlier is truly not normal. Until now, I can still feel the way I want to kill everyone in my sight, as I kept on asking them, How did they know me when I don’t even know myself?This is fucked up, but I don’t have an answer within me either. "Will I get crazy again?" My low tone reveals my confusion as well as the anxiety that overwhelms me as I spe
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 35
I always ask myself, Is it real that I’m finding myself, or am I gradually losing myself? What is the real answer to this question? That is yet to be determined, or perhaps I already know it deep inside my heart. Lowering my head and suddenly falling silent, I only saw Clive’s feet on the ground after a few seconds; he is already in front of me. Slowly, I lifted my head, and our eyes met. Those eyes are still the same as the moment I saw them for the first time in that bar. They were particularly mysterious and oppressive, and yet as I stare at them, those green eyes seem to have a lot to say but can’t for some reason."What do you think of my skills?" He started grinning, showing his white teeth. "Impressive?" His brows playfully move. My throat moved after swallowing all the questions that were about to come out of my lips. Calling them questions is not appropriate either. In fact, they are all doubts... to which I am afraid to know the answer. "You are," I replied, not breaking
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 34
Our tongues intertwine as I almost can’t breathe, as though Clive is determined to take all my breath away. I didn’t even know where we changed locations or if I walked by myself or if he carried me as my back was suddenly pressed against the hard surface of the table. A moan couldn’t help but escape from my lips when Clive suddenly bit my lips, letting me open my mouth for his invasive tongue to completely take over and explore the insides of my mouth as though he couldn’t wait to mark his territory. With my lightheaded mind that suddenly becomes filled with pleasure and the tingling that wells up in my gut, I hold Clive’s arms with my left hand, and my other hand encircles his neck. He is now standing in between my legs, his right hand holding my legs to steady them around his waist, while his left hand is holding my chin and tracing my jaw, deepening the kiss even further. I can't even seriously respond to the kiss, aside from the tingling and weird feeling that it brought. Ther
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 33
I don't know where it started but I am now looking at Clive in a different light. Is it bad to feel secure in the words of your abductor? Perhaps it really is. Have I gone totally insane, or is the influence of my past self slowly coming back to me? Is this what Stockholm syndrome feels like? However, even though I know that this is bad, I can’t seem to stop either. Without responding to him, I nodded my head and turned my head to gaze at the dark shooting target. Holding the gun in my hand, which seemed to become particularly heavy, I positioned my body, not minding if it was right. Finally, my finger clicked the trigger at the same time that my pupils seemed to narrow as all the instincts that this body had surfaced. My blood boiled as though celebrating after all the pent-up years, so I shot another and didn’t stop. Amidst the sounds of the gun, there is a ringing in my ears as I can hear the circulation of my blood as I keep shooting with my heart accelerating, yet my expressio
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 32
I roam my eyes around after entering the underground training room, it’s still the same as when I first came here. The only thing that is different is my current mood, which was way too tense last time and has now begun to relax. And my relationship with Clive was far too tense before—although it’s still now, it has made such considerable progress that I can look around this room without worrying. I have the time to look at the variety of guns and weapons inside. I don’t know their names and have never seen them before, but for some reason, they actually feel so familiar to me. This doesn’t stump me anymore; after the last time, I no longer try to deny my connection with the underground world. It is a step for me to accept my real self, even though I don’t know if it’s a good thing. I can’t deny myself. I reach out and take one gun off the shelf and touch it curiously. It is different from the rifle I used last time. As I look at it, it feels as though I have an insight, which ra
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 31
I fall silent, and my mind repeats my words in my mind. What the heck, what did I say? Seriously, I just blurted that out from nowhere and even so naturally.Clive is also looking at me, although I can’t actually read his thoughts at all. Is he going to tease me for it? However, the man is still staring at me like his soul has left him, and I am so shocked by what I said.I gave a dry cough to try to get rid of the awkward feeling in the room caused by my loud mouth. Then I pretended to laugh as well."I mean, I’m just joking." I start with my reasoning, which is clearly that I’m not good at this and I don’t even know what I’m saying. But since I already started, I have to continue, right? In the first place, I’m the one who created this atmosphere."Are you the only one who could joke? Whatever, I’m going to sleep." And then I averted my gaze, turning my back to him, before shamelessly trying so hard to integrate myself into the mattress as if that would make me invincible.Shutting
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 30
"Clive, who really are you?" Amidst the silence, I inquired as if it were random.I think it’s also random; it just came out of my mouth. However, I think it’s because I’m so curious and want to know him more. I feel like once i fully know him, the light of my past will expose itself to me.It sounds so ridiculous, but that’s really how I think at that moment."It depends. Who do you want me to be?" As his voice rang, I shifted my gaze to him. Like me, he is also looking at the green scenery in front of them.And when I glance at him, he turns and faces me as well. He still had his casual expression, however, and I can sense that there is something within.My brows furrow as I hear this question again. It comes from a different question, but it also means the same thing."Why can’t you just directly answer me? Is it hard?" I argued, although my voice was still low, and I emphasized my words to let him know I really didn’t like how he answered sometimes.Clive answers me and reveals th
Lie To Me, My Love Chapter 29
My mouth slightly opens, and I'm about to ask him what the appropriate word is for him to respond, but it feels as if something lump in my throat is preventing me from saying anything.What is it that is stopping me from asking Clive? I shake my head, and a wry smile appears on my lips. Do I really not know the answer? Of course, I have an idea, but I don’t want to think about it yet.I don’t want to ruin this deceivingly harmonious atmosphere around us, and if I can, I want to hold on to it for as long as I can.The silence shrouded us once more. It isn’t uncomfortable, but it gives the illusion that everything is fine. Why does it need to be fake if it feels so stable and secure?“Are you sleepy?” I ask after another moment of silence, my fingers playing with the covers. Actually, I’m so drowsy that I want to lie down and sleep again.Yet, I also don’t want to waste time sleeping again, even though I know it’s a side effect of the medicine. I still force myself to stay awake and tal
