Chapter 5

AUSTIN.

Tyler was still not okay after Garrett left the packhouse — the little pup that he thought was his. Although he was doing his job as he was supposed to, like the true Beta that he was, he would always be quiet, which was something new. 

So Jace and I were doing our best to help him cope and make sure he was not left alone all the time. We knew Tyler was strong, but there was only so much a man could take. 

We all tried to act normal while casually supporting him, while I kept pretending everything was okay on my end. I didn’t tell anyone my own problem, or should I say the problem I created?

But what they say is true: all secrets will be revealed in time.

Tyler, Jace, and I were at the front of the packhouse, just sitting on the steps and looking at the territory we ran when the sound of an approaching vehicle rang in the air. 

I heard the other two murmur as they wondered who it was, but with the way my heart was thudding loudly, I was already assuming the car was there for me. 

‘Did Lexi arrive?’ I sent a mind-linked message to Menard, who was one of the patrollers on the border that I assumed Lexi would enter if she was ever to arrive there. 

‘Yes, with a guy. We checked the car, and we let it in as it’s Lexi. And man, she looks more beautiful than she was…’

I didn’t hear the rest of his words because I got stuck on the word “guy” that was with her. Did she bring a human in here? Was it the fucker who came with those ugly flowers and balloons? 

I cursed under my breath when the car stopped. I was not sure if the cursing was because of the idea that she had come or because she brought a man with her. 

I was not even done deciding which one had resulted in my action when the passenger door of the car opened, and out came Hurricane Lexi with a face as dark as the typhoon clouds.

I cleared my throat and was about to greet her, but like the hurricane that she was, she was already surging toward me with big strides. Her hand went up, and I already knew what was coming. 

She slapped me. Again.

Alpha Jace and Beta Tyler were stunned, but I was not. I was expecting it. 

I let my tongue roll in my inner cheek — the area where she hit me because it stung — but I didn’t say anything and let my hands remain inside my pockets. 

“Where is my son? Give me David, or I swear to the Goddess I will have the police come here and search the packhouse!” Lexi’s anger was surging through her whole body, but I didn’t let it rattle me.

“Why did they let you out? I told them to look after you.” I said in a calm tone as I slowly shifted my gaze to check on the man who got out of the driver’s seat.

Blondie was here.

“If you think charming the doctor to make them make me stay for two fucking weeks while you ran away with my son will work for a long time, you are wrong! I’m going to kill you, Austin!”

Charmed the doctor? I didn’t do anything. They told me about her condition, and I just took advantage of it. 

I was about to answer that when Jace appeared beside Lexi and held her arm. “Calm down.”

“Alpha…” Her voice softened as she looked at him. 

“Let’s talk inside. People are looking.” Jace said in a low voice.

“I have someone with me,” Lexi told him.

Jace nodded to someone behind me, and I saw Marshall pass by me to go to Mr. Blondie. He was inside the packhouse and probably went out when he heard the commotion.

“Marshall will take care of him. He’s from what pack?” Jace asked her as he guided her inside while Tyler nudged me to move and get inside the packhouse as well. 

“Lone wolf. I’m sorry for shouting…” Her voice broke. “He took my son, and the people at the hospital don’t want me to go to find them. They said I signed the paper allowing him to take him home. I was still under hospital arrest because I lost a lot of blood. But I’m not sick! And I didn’t sign anything allowing him to take David. I’m going to kill Austin, Alpha!”

“Calm down. David is safe here. And I will have someone take him to you.” Jace told her as we walked the corridor to his office while my jaw tightened. 

I didn’t like that Alpha was taking charge. This was my life, and David is my son. 

“No!” I growled and continued speaking, even if the Alpha gave me a warning look. “She didn’t want me to be involved in David’s life, so I had no other recourse...”

“Calm down, man. We will talk inside the office.” Tyler told me as he kept patting my back.

My chest was heaving, but I shut my mouth. As soon as we entered the room, Lexi turned to face the Alpha. “I want to see David.”

“We need to talk first, or he might feel the tension...” Jace tried.

“You don’t understand!” Lexi interrupted him, and her voice rose again. 

“Calm down…”

“No, Alpha! My breasts fucking hurt, and I feel like dying! I need him to breastfeed from me. Pumping is painful, and if this milk doesn’t come out, I might have more problems. My son needs me as much as I need him, so get him to me now!” She said it in one breath, and my eyes shifted to her breasts. 

They were definitely bigger than the last time I saw her in the hospital. They were the first thing I noticed when she came out of the car today, but I didn’t have time to appreciate them as she came and attacked me right away.

But before any of us could say more, the office door swung open, and I knew I was fucked up. I might be twenty-one now, but there was a female I was terrified to cross, and it was the female who came in.

“Lexi!” Mom gasped before her eyes shifted between Lexi and me while Dad entered the room after her.

I was doomed. 

“Mom…” Lexi’s shoulders shook as her sobs finally came out, and Mom immediately came forward to hug her. 

“I didn’t know it was you…” Mom spoke in a soft voice.

“I need to see David, please. It’s been hell not knowing if he’s okay or not.” She cried in her arms.

“He’s okay, but he’s missing you, of course. Come.” Mom held her hand before she turned around and pointed a finger at me. Anger was an understatement. Her eyes told me that all the punishment and scolding I got from her growing up was nothing compared to what was about to come my way. “Stay where you are, Austin Joseph. I will come back for you!”

As soon as they left, Dad locked the door before turning his full attention to me.  

“Explain, and make sure you have a fucking good explanation for what you did.” His voice was firm, but his face showed no emotions at all, and I knew I was in a bad place.

All these years, Dad had tolerated all my antics and would always pass everything off as a joke. But I guess this time, I went overboard.

“What do you want to hear? Yes, I stole David. I went to her and made her sign the waiver while she was dizzy with sedatives….” His fist hit my jaw before I could finish speaking.

I felt the full impact, but nothing was more painful than not being given a chance to explain.

My jaw tightened as I held my face. Jace and Tyler tried to hold Dad and calm him down while I crouched on the floor and let all my emotions out. 

I was sick and tired of pretending to be okay when I wasn’t.

I knew I got terrified and abandoned Lexi at the first sign of responsibility, but it was not true that I didn’t care. I spent many sleepless nights going back and forth to Bernice City to look for her while still doing my best to function as a Gamma for this pack.

It wasn’t easy. While my Alpha and Beta had each other and me as they tried to navigate their own problems, I had no one. 

Just me. I carried the burden alone because I knew I had messed up. I might be a Gamma, the strongest warrior in this pack, but I was allowed to have my moments of weakness, too.

“Did any of you know how it feels to be in the same place as them, but you couldn’t get to them?” I began. I was willing to lay out everything because I had no choice. “I begged Lexi to let me inside the delivery room, and she said no. I was there before she gave birth, and I kept begging. Imagine the mighty, happy-go-lucky Austin begging for a space to see my son being delivered. I begged, Dad. I apologized too many times for being a coward, but she kept saying no. 

Do you all know where I was while she was giving birth? One of the male nurses let me watch from a one-way window because he knew how it felt to be discarded in his kid’s life. And I had no idea how many times I thanked him because he let me see David come out of Lexi. I watched in silence. I cried on my own when David came out. I couldn’t touch him.” I was already a mess from crying, but I didn’t stop talking.

“I felt like trash, but I stayed. I thought if Lexi saw that I was there, without changing clothes or doing anything wrong, she would take pity on me and let me hold my son. But she was so fucking heartless. I could only see David when the same male was on his shift. He would open the curtains on the nursery window so I could see David whenever Lexi was asleep. 

I didn’t even know she named him after Grandpa until I saw the nameplate on him. I know I was wrong in every sense, but none of you even asked me about me or why I did that. I just want to be there for my son. I know I fucked up when I told her I was not ready to be a father yet, but did anyone of you get your act together on your first try?”

I stood up and wiped my tears. “She was asked to stay in the hospital as she lost a lot of blood. The only thing I did was tell them to extend her for another week and pay for the bill because I knew once she got out, she would take David away. I’m just taking advantage of the little time I get to spend with my boy. I know I might never see him again once she takes him.”

I couldn’t stop crying because I just wanted to go to him already, as I was sure Lexi would take him and leave right away. 

I tilted my head up and looked at Dad. “I’m sorry. I know I’m a disappointment. I fucked up, Dad. Help me. I don’t want David to forget about me.”

Dad’s arms went around me as he hugged me tightly, brushing my back. “We will think of something.”

“He’s mine too. He’s my son. I don’t know what to do anymore.” I kept mumbling over and over again. “Help me.”