By the time I'm out of class and down the corridor,far away from Jacob and his sadism , the adrenalin washes away , and my smile slowly dims as I just realised what in the frickity frick I just did .
I kicked Jacob Knight .
I kicked Jacob fucking Knight in his fucking balls .
I groan . I crouch down hiding my face in my hands and groan out , what was wrong with me , that guy was a fucking psycho and I had a first class experience of it , when he set me against the odds and it was when I only slapped him , now what will happen to me , with me kicking him in his balls ?
My hands are sweaty , I can feel that much against my face .
I'm still busy with the aftermaths of my adrenalin rush but then I hear voices coming out from not too far away and from the sound of it , It looks like a lovers quarrel .
Not wanting to trespass on something so private , I rise but then the voice of the girl drifts over to me and instead of walking back inside, I step down the stairs of the backyard of the school , hiding behind a wall and look over to where the sounds were coming from .
And Lo and behold , I catch the familiar brunette hair , streaked with pink highlights . It was Selina , my best friend, my soul mate and my freaking everything in this damn school , With none other than Conan fucking Salvador.
" I didn't do it " she yells at him trying to break free from his grip at her wrist , and it takes all my self control to rush down and help her out because I knew that she wouldn't like it .Sel liked to fight her battles alone and this fight was her's not mine , it will do real good to me if I were to step in it .
" So you mean to say , she is lying ?" bites Conan , with a sneer worthy of Knight .
" I don't know anything! I know that I didn't steal shit from her !" she says sounding close to tears
I grip the wall hard, I knew that she is speaking the truth . No matter how much Sel struggled financially , she will never stoop so low as to steal and whatever, allegations , Conan just accused her of was driving to her edge. Because Sel doesn't cry , she is one of the bravest girl I have ever met .
I knew that Sel will hate me for this but I steel myself to walk down and go all Mumma bear on Conan Salvador , even though I knew he was well capable of ruining my life even more but my pace falters when Sel, breaks free of his grip and rush past me not even noticing me standing there .
But that doesn't mean that someone else didn't , I feel a cold penetrating gaze directed at the back of my head but I don't look back instead I tore after Sel . Conan can go to hell for all I care , with Jacob right on my ass , I don't think it will be too bad to have Conan as well .
Finding Sel wasn't difficult all I had to was to walk after the sounds of someone sobbing and I find her sitting on the bleachers , crying her eyes out . It looked too personal to me when I stop in front of her as if I have just intruded something private . But I couldn't leave her alone , not anymore . Ever since the third year started , I feel like as if my best friend was getting out of my grasp , somewhere ,I couldn't reach her anymore .
" Sel?" I call her tentatively .
And as I expected she stiffens , The sobs come to an abrupt stop .
" Are you okay? " I knew that she didn't like it when I intrude on her private time but she looks so out of it , I can barely care about her getting angry at me .
" I'm fine " she says in a small voice .
" Did - Did Salvador hurt you ?" I ask hesitantly , and by the glare she throws my way , I knew she was wishing me to drop dead for asking that.
" He didn't " her eyebrows scrunches up and lips form a thin line always a danger sign but maybe after what I just had to deal with Jacob, maybe I was feeling a little too suicidal because I ask her what I shouldn't have at all .
" Did you steal something from him?" the question blurts out of my mouth before I can stop it .
And as I expected , Sel straighten up , glaring hard at me she says " do you take me for a thief ? I will never - how can you even say that ?"
The hurt in her voice is too much for me to handle and I regret the words wishing , they never left my damn mouth.
" I didn't meant it like that " I'm fumbling the ball , but I can't let my small mistake fuck up our friendship " I mean , did you steal something close to him , to get back at him or some sort ?"
It was the stupidest thing I could come up with but Sel was too wrung up that she didn't notice , Anything odd .
" No , I didn't " .
" Then why was he with you , and what was that all about ?" I ask her , now that she want glowering at me anymore,I guessed it was safe to ask some more questions .
"Nothing , just a small misunderstanding " she smiles at me , a smile that doesn't reach her pretty brown eyes " don't worry about me ".
I wish to tell her that from how Conan was interrogating her it didn't looked anywhere near to a misunderstandings but not wanting to hurt her anymore , I didn't say those words out loud .
She was chewing on her bottom lip and I knew that she didn't want to talk about the matter anymore .
And I let it drop , she will eventually tell me whatever was happening to her . For now all I can do is try to boost her morale .
" We will be fine , this year is ours , we will nail it " rubbing her shoulder I say to her .
"How? How do you know that? " she stares at me , her gaze blank and void as if it got lost somewhere .
" Sel ?" I call out to her but she didn't seem that she had heard me at all because all of sudden , she continues in the same void , cold voice "We can't stop them. We can only bow our head and accept whatever they throw at us and pray they don't miss so we don't have to endure it again. They can't be stopped! "
" Sel.!" I look at her in shock , she was the one who told me to keep my head high and ignore everything when shit went down with Jacob " how can you say something like this ? "
" I'm tired , Bella" tears shining in her eyes she chokes out on a sob " I'm not as strong as you think I'm, I can't do it anymore .I want it to end, all of this .For years , I'm going through with it . Yes I fucked up , I know .But I'm only human , it was a mistake .Just How long do they will make me suffer, ?" wiping her tears she says.
My body turn stiff because I knew by they Sel didn't mean the four this time , she meant Conan and the she , he mentioned in their conversation .
And I knew that she was speaking the truth when she said , she had enough because Sel never cries nor does she ever snap like that .
She was strong with whole lot of guts than me , if something can make her snap like that .It wasnt anything good .
Who was she?
And what did Sel stole from her ?
I had no answer to these questions and I suddenly came to a realisation that maybe I don't know my best friend as well I think , I did .
I wanted to shake her demand answers to my questions but before I can even do that , There was loud 'Smash 'followed by an even louder ouch .
I and Sel wheeled around and to our surprise , It was Ron .All sprawled , face front on the grass with pages flying everywhere . We rush to him , grabbing pages on the way .
" Are you okay ?" kneeling down I ask him
" Mm okay Mr .Hussain , I got my assignment somewhere just let me find it " Ron looked throughly disoriented and I was certainly getting more worried about him by each passing minutes .
" Its me , Bella " I tell him
" Ah , Bells " he looks up " What's up short stack ?"
He raises one arm but instead of patting my head , he pats Selina who slaps his arm away .
" What the hell , Bells?"
" Its Selina " Selina tell him scowling
" Oh I thought I missed something , your hair is not that soft as Bells " still grinning lopsidedly he says .
I and Sel look at each other and come to a rather obvious conclusion , Ron was drunk . Not just drunk he was totally wasted .
" Are you okay , did you drive here?" I ask him , looking at him , he doesn't seem that hurt but one can never be sure with Ron .
" Nah , big bro said no .He stuffed me in his car and then dumped my sorry ass on that footpath right out of the school"
I sigh in relief ,at least someone in his family was responsible . And by it I literally means that the only sane person in his family was his big brother . His mother married his father only for money and then ran away with on of her drug dealer of a lovers and his father, the head of a famous law firm, wasn't exactly super daddy of the world . Apart from dumping huge stacks of money in his sons pockets , he cared nothing about them . So all in all , Ron 's big brother was the one who sort of bought him up , and I wish he didn't missed some important aspects while raising his little brother which included Not letting his brother anywhere near alcohol.
" He is wasted " muttered Selina under her breath .
" I know " I whisper back .
" Here what's this whispering ?"
I shake my head at him , taking His history assignment from Sel and help Ron up to his feet .
Long and lanky as he was , I was surprised with how heavy he was , when Sel helped me stand him up .
" We you be alright ?" Sel asks me , we didn't share History together , which meant that I alone will have to take Ron to the class .
" I will be alright , I think " .
We say goodbye to each other as Sel seperated from us down the corridor for her English class leaving , me alone with Ron who was now leaning upon me,his head upon mine.
I grab his waist doing all, what I can to stop him from falling forward . And to my surprise, he was quite muscular, being the sloppy little drunkard,he was .
" Wow Ron, You got quite some muscles in there "
" did you just cope a feel of mine, Bells?"
" Its hard not notice when you are leaning down on me like this " I can literally feel heat rushing to my cheeks .
" Girls don't like a sloppy fatty alcoholic , they like sloppy six pack alcoholic " he muses .
I roll my eyes at him . I wasn't interested in knowing his personal life some details were good left alone .
I half dragged , half supported Ron to our history class .
Thankfully its full now .Jacob sitting with his , friends .Conan was on his phone chatting with whoever the she , he was having a fling with , Lewis brandishing a new tech he might have just found , Seth arguing with him , And Jacob laughing at their antics .
The four horsemen for others
The four devils for me .
The rest of the class attention was upon them .Some either trying to get in on their conversation or simply watching .
And I knew why they were attracted to the four .
Power
Wealth
fame
Charm .
The four represents these attributes well and whoever looked at them couldn't help but be attracted .
I wish everyone will keep their attention on them and I will successfully slip in along with Ron . But luck was not on my side, it never was .
" Ooooooooo the nerd and the wanker "
cat calls fills the room and I can't help but blush down to the tips of my already red hair .
" Oi , Ronny , did Waddington broke something while you both were doing it ?" someone calls behind us but I ignore him .
" Never took you for someone who had a sick fetish for chubby chicks " a spiteful voice calls back at us .
I look sideways and I'm not even shocked at her arrival , Margaret , Ron's ex girlfriend . She was glaring hard at me , her eyes throwing draggers at my arm wrapped around his waist .I wished I can remove it but it will mean letting Ron fall down to his face .
" I hope your little thing doesn't break inside her fat stink hole " she sneers .
I try to move , but Ron simply refuse to budge . Instead his head that was lying sideways on my head , was now raised .
" Well at least her hole doesn't stink like yours " grinning as broadly as ever , silence spreading over the class but Ron wasn't done " The last time I went down yours , I swear it smelled so bad as if a skunk rode up yours and died there "
Margaret looks absolutely livid a mouth gaping at him , she wasn't the only one .I too was too shocked at what Ron has just announced , I could care less about Margaret, she was nothing but a wanna be queen bee . Instead I was shocked at him for letting the class believe that he and I were a thing .
While I'm thankful to him , for taking my side and standing up for me .I couldn't help but scold him still blushing as furiously as ever, he could have done that without announcing our non existent relationship .
And then I saw him , standing there all traces of smile gone . His jaw ticking , his eyes stormier than ever .
Jacob starts to walk in our direction but Conan grips his wrist, and with a shake of his head stops Jacob from coming at us .I'm thankful to him even though he made my best friend cry . I had enough on my plate with Ron throwing me together with him down the bus , And wasn't sure if I wanted to have Jacob thrown into the loop as well . It was funny how , I was so scared of him when considering how I once stood my grounds against him .People cat calls behind me as I help Ron into one of the desk , right in front of me . But thankfully, the sweet lord above me has finally gotten bored of putting me up for this shit , as Mr .Hussain walks right into class silencing everyone with his glare .I take the seat behind Ron's and hope for this period to pass as peacefully as it can but then , a shadow very much like the devil looms over my head , I didn't even need to raise my head to know who it was as Jacob's citrusy scen
Jacob brings me to the boys locker room .I know I shouldn't be there , all alone with him but considering how he had ignored all my calls about talking right out in the football field .I knew I had no choice ." Inside, Princess " he opens the door to the locker room and motions with his hands for me to enter it first, I shouldn't have , instead I should have taken a turn and ran away from him . But the stupid moron , I was , I walk right into the tiger's den .The locker room smell exactly as I imagined it will , the overpowering smell of sweat and musk with a twinge of something odd invades my nostrils the second I enter the locker room.Jacob follows after me and I hear a familiar click of as in ' door clicking shut ' click . I don't think he will shut the door , Jacob, himself had once said that there was no way he will be interested in chubby chicks like me , if that was the case I don't
BellaHave you ever been whacked by a baseball bat ? Because that's how I was feeling right now . It was as if someone has just sledgedhammered me.My mind was blank , my heart was dancing conga and my legs ? They were just numb . Clutching Jacob's shirt , I slid down the floor of the locker room , considering my slight mysophobia , my arms should have broken down with goosebumps but right now I was much too entangled with the shit that just went down with Jacob .The indecipherable look Jacob just threw my way had my breath go shaky , my hands were trembling and I was barely holding on to my rationality .When I walked inside the locker room letting Jacob have the leverage to corner me like he just did , I wanted freaking answers to my questions . I wanted to know why he made me the school's punching bag and why was he being so difficult to understand , what was wit
Jacob" Do you really want to do this ?"My best friend really need to change his annoying habit of pestering me when I am not in the mood of being pestered by his nonsensical nonsense .You would think that after getting punched in the face would have stopped him from nosing in my business , but evidently not ." What do you mean by ' I want to do this ?" I glare at him , straightening up my jerseyHe leans on the hood of my Lexus and crossed his arms over his chest , I had this sudden urge to kick the annoying bastard of my hood but I didn't or more like I couldn't . Conan was the captain of the team , if I so much as touched him , I might find my ass stuck on the bleachers for the rest of the season.And that's not good for me , not being everyone 's golden boy .
BellaBy the time I'm finished dumping the tattered letter jacket that belonged to my ' awesomely ' awesome brother in the trash bin behind the bar where I worked , my nerves were still taut and I had my anxiety rolling high on whatever shit Jacob fed me .You would think that being trapped inside the boy's locker room for almost an hour would have set my mind ringing with alarm in full blast but maybe I was too high on adrenaline these days , as not only did I stole my brother's letter jacket while the guys were showering , I even had this sudden urge to key Jacob's obnoxious Lexus .But as I was late for my work , I had to give up on the idea of keying a certain someone's car . That didn't mean that my temper got better or I was no longer pissed , that would explain all those stabbing holes in my brother's jacket ." Feeling alright? " asked Mr Z , as I head in the
JacobThe moment my consiousness returned I wasn't surprised at finding Anna's arms wrapped around my waist like some freaking octopus . Disentangling , her arms , I got off the bed and started searching for my clothes ignoring the throbbing of my head .I don't even know when she dragged me into her room and I barely suppressed the groan of irritation that was lodged in my throat ..After what happened at Conan 's I should have learnt my lesson of never getting drunk as hell .But after what happened with Bella , Annabeth , Helena and all the shit fucking motherfuckers that I knew off , I needed some sort of stress relief .I looked at Anna who was sleeping soundly on the bed and this time I groaned out .I just kinda confessed to little bible princess this morning and fucked another girl at night .
" You are late " my mother griped the second I entered through the front door , like it was my damn fault .She knew that after school I have to head straight to my work ,money has always been tight in our house . Always has been the moment we shifted to this damn city , that was the reason why I had no such thing as college fund , when we moved here my mother did opened a saving account and it has only hundred dollar or whatever hundred dollar plus two years of interest on hundred dollar was , which if you ask me wasn't much ." We had a rush hour " I answered her not wanting to have a fight with her as soon as I returned but I did hoped that she won't say anything that will irk the third world war in our house , clearly I was wrong ." Sit down , I have a very important thing to tell you " and without so much as giving me a chance to refuse , she swaggered back to the dining room .
♡ Bella ♡Pulling in the parking lot of my school with a gaunt face is something that I never wanted to do but after the farce that happened last night with my mother I guess , I didn't had much of a choice .Its Monday which totally sucks given I had no rest day to make up for my sleep that I missed last night .For as long as I remember I have been a person who had a firm control over her life and always had a thin shred of inner peace within me .But now my inner peace was broken , stomped and left to churn inside me .I can't even focus right now .Thanks to My mum , Chris , Jennifer and ....Jacob . My stomach somersault like a crazy as I passed by his obnoxious Lexus in the parking lot .I don't even bother hiding my grimace of unease .Or was it unease ? I didn't kno
EpilogueOne year later“What I’m trying to say is you can’t blame me for this !” exclaimed Jason , almost lunging at his girlfriend ‘s throat “ you are trying to argue with me with your so called theory but I’m telling you its not gonna work . If you gonna counter my theory you better prove it with real facts not ideologies “I grinned as Alicia gripped her head and groaned , like her head was going to explode any moment because of all the stress and frustration her boyfriend was giving her . Their debate session are always intense despite how loving they are out of the debate club , once inside - oh boy , they would be ready to lunge at each others throat and if I didn’t knew better I would have taken them as mortal enemies .They have never met a topic where the two of them would be able to cordially agree with each other . At first everyone was alarmed and worried when we firs
Bella“ Holy sizzles “ gasped Selina “ you look so beautiful ““ I know right “ said Adriana as she swiped her fake tears with her forefinger “ this is my master piece ,simply flaw-fucking -less amazing “To add to the effect she even sniffed” are you ready ?”Of course I was , this morning Adriana had stormed inside the room that I was sharing with Selina . I have told her in passing that I was going to do my makeup on my own - and believe me the girl squawked so loudly she was one pitch lower than the seagulls .If I wasn’t ready after all that , then I would never be ready . I nodded and once I did , Selina and Adriana grabbed my shoulders before turning me around to face the mirror .And I only had one word in my mind - Gorgeous .The solid champagne slit dress indeed flattered my curves , somehow it made me feel beautiful yet sexy at the same time . A
Bella“ It was the wedding dammit ! “ shrieked my mother “ I wanted you to be beautiful , I wanted you to feel beautiful ! Have you seen Lily ? She looks beautiful , she is healthy and active . The second she appeared in the wedding hall everyone’s gaze was locked upon her and she wasn’t even the bridesmaid ! What about you where were you ? I will tell you “ pointing her fore finger right at my face , my mother snarled “ you were being ignored , everyone was ignoring you despite Jennifer standing next to you because you are not what this society calls beautiful and healthy . You are average Bella , just average ! Do you want to be average ? Because I don’t ! I want my daughter to be beautiful and healthy , the centre of attention ! Even now the doctor can blame it all on the medicine but if you ask me , I say that it was all because you were so heavy . It wasn’t the side effect of the medicine that I gave you , No matter how much those doctor insist it is until they turn bl
Jacob“ Okay first question , exactly how much ICD one needs to overdose and die ? “ I asked but then furrowed my brows “ guess what that’s a stupid question isn’t it ? You can’t answer anyway . So “ I shrugged casually “Let’s see what exactly is the level of ICD overdose ,I can find it myself no need to trouble you “Wilkins ‘s eyes got as wide as saucers as he started to moan continuously , his eyes darting to the door and back to me .“ Ah , you better stop doing that - Grampy “ I told him with a warning note in my voice “ if something happened to you right now , you don’t even have someone to plan your funeral tonight “His eyes widened but he stopped struggling . His body went slack , and his chest rose and fell with uneven breaths . His eyes locked at the needles in my hand .“ that’s a good grampy “ I cooed soft
Bella" I think I will - umm , go ?" said Anna as she walked past Ron without waiting for an answer from me . I wanted to ask Ron , what was that about but the expression on his face made it clear that he didn't want to talk abut what happened just now .So , I swallowed my questions back . Instead I smiled at him " Hey , how are you doing ?"Ron who was still looking over his shoulder , turned his head back at me and smiled back " come on short stacks , is this question something you should be asking ? Instead it should be me asking , how do you feel after beating the death 's ass ?"I sit up a little more comfortably and flash him a victory sign " It feels awesome , I was -"I couldn't even get the words out because he already has his arms wrapped around me so tightly , that it was becoming a struggle to breathe ." I was so scared ,Bella .. just so scared " he said , his shoulders shaking as he rested his head on m
Bella" when I almost lost you , I realised how much I needed you " he said resting his forehead against mine " I didn't think about it while you were right by my side , but when I thought I was going to lose you , I realised that I never told you how much I need you "" I know , that already Jake "" Throughout my life I was scared about needing someone , scared that someday someone would want me and I would want her too "" I know that too "" No , you don't get it " he said nuzzling his head to my neck as he let his head drop down " You have no concept of how much I need you , if you knew you wouldn't be so calm , it would scare the hell out of you . It scares me too "" well , if it makes you feel better . I feel the same " All my life I have fought my battles alone , I have been disappointed so much by my family that I grew resistant even at the thought of needing someone . But Jacob was essential for me ." Glad
Jacob“ Hey , I’m back mum “ standing in front of the white headstone without Dante was awkward enough . But I knew I had to be here because she had always been there for me , I placed the bouquet of roses on her grave . My chest was rippling with so much relief and gratitude than ever before “ just so you know , I’m going to fulfil that promise the one that I made to you . I will study hard and inherit Dante -no Dad ‘s company and be a better man and son , a son you can be proud of ““What I want to say - oh to hell with this “ I wasn’t the emotional type and with all the errs and momentary pauses I was certain that my mum must be laughing at me if she was watching me right now “ What I want to say , is thank you . “ I looked at her grave before looking up at the blue sky “ Thank you so much mum , I know you came through for me …I know you did “Because she had
JacobI knew that this was real selfish on my part but you know what fuck it , because if I don’t put a stop on my pain right now , it will keep brewing until I was on the verge of dying with it . So better just end it before it becomes too much for me to handle .“ Mom , you don’t owe me a damn thing . But if you really have a pull up there I need you to string it up for me -please bring her back to me because I need her “ still leaning against the cold marble tomb , I uttered my final plea “ if you bring her back I will try my best to be a son that you can be proud of , so please tell that guy to return her back , I will do anything -please mum “Nothing , not even a flicker of grass or any soft caress of wind flew next to me . And I knew she didn’t hear it , And honestly I didn’t blame her because if I was in her place where my own kid loved my murderer instead , I wouldn’t listen to his damn ple
Jacob"I know you will be really pissed off about this but honestly I don't care because I have been pissed at you all my life and couldn't do a thing to you so yeah - that account is settled . Now we are going to talk about the new one -Bella , she is really a good person , she is loving , compassionate and caring - something I can't say about myself " I stopped breathing hard as emotions clogged my throat , I cleared it before continuing on with my speech that I have prepared after thoughtful consideration " and she is mine , you hear me mine not yours and you have no right to take her because -" my vision went hazy and something warm and wet trickled down my cheeks . I inhaled sharply staring down at the wooden flooring away from the altar " because she is my everything . I know people shit around the word ' love ' a lot now a days but this different . I have already promised her a future together and I can't fulfil that one promise if she is not by my side . " my voic