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Chapter 40
Last Updated:
2025-01-18 13:00:52Camila
Days had flown by as I tried to understand how on earth, I let this happen. My boyfriend was dead. My sister hated me so much. I lost everything I cared for, and now it was time to end it all. I would never live safe as long as I was alive, but I wanted to keep living. I was going to live if it was the last thing I do. I grabbed my boyfriend’s burner phone with his cousin’s number. I unlocked it and hit the call button. It rang a few times. “Hey Zack, what’s up?” I was hesitant but it needed to be done. “Hey this is Zack’s girlfriend. I need your help.” I replied. “Where is my cousin Camila?” He asked. Tears poured down my eyes, as I had to be the bearer of bad news. “He’s dead. My sister killed him.” It went silent over the phone. I heard him breathing hard. “I am coming over.” The phone went silent. Not even thirty minutes passed
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Illegal Love Chapter 41
I spent my day training in the gym, while the kids were in school. I had a trainer help with my reflexes and attacks. I didn’t ask the guys because they’d end up turning it sexual, and quite frankly so would I. “Nadia, keep your eyes open when someone swings at you.” He went for another swing that I dodged, but I blinked again. “Listen, in that blink of an eye you will be open to an attack.” I was so tired I fell to the ground and laid on it. “Are you okay?” He asks. “I am drained, and my nerves are on fire. I think I am going to call it quits for the evening and go get my kids.” He reached his arm to lift me up. “You know most people that have me as a private trainer, do it because they’ve experienced something traumatic and they want to be in control.” I went to take a drink out of my canister. He wasn’t wrong. “I used to be able to protect myself really well.
Last Updated : 2025-01-19Illegal Love Chapter 42
8 years later…I’d like to think that things have changed since I lost the love of my life, but they didn’t. Shortly after we booked our last-minute tickets to New Mexico. Things weren’t the same. For months and months, I was just separated from the entire world. Carter is amazing, but I was dumb enough not to appreciate it. We struggled getting a good place. Like we had everything, but I could only find comfort in him physically. I just wanted to feel love again. But it seemed that it never came. One day I told myself I need to fake that I’m okay, hoping that I’d trick my mind into thinking everything was okay. I fell pregnant again shortly after. Yes again. Giving birth to my now seven-year-old daughter Nelani. You can imagine what it’s like to have three kids. Slightly after she was born, things became rocky. Slowly Carter began to pull away from me. We got mar
Last Updated : 2025-01-20Illegal Love Chapter 1
You know as a little girl, I was always told,"Life is what you make it. If it doesn't turn out as planned, know you were in control."Yet, what if it was too late to fix it? What if good intentions turn bad and suddenly you're in a never-ending cycle of bad? This isn't a love story or how I came to be, but a story about never-ending pain and suffering. I held onto his lifeless body after hearing him say he loved me. I stroked his light red hair and watched as his eyes were no longer staring into a future. I failed and yet I did nothing to find the solution, just created more and more of the problem. I was the problem.My family is from Juarez, Mexico. A place with great food, but also so much sadness. The poverty is bad, the police are corrupt, and yet no one was doing anything about it. My father was raised in the Cartel life; never knowing anything else. Killing, kidnapping, drugs, and everything you've come to expect. Yet when he met my mother, she became his entire world. He feare
Last Updated : 2021-03-08Illegal Love Chapter 2
I knew how these things go. Women who were kidnapped get trafficked and sold like dogs, and I was not about to let these girls be victims. I let myself ponder for some time trying to figure out how to get out of this mess. I weighed all the options. But sadly, there wasn't anything except for one, and my heart had no desire to do it."Listen I have a plan. When those doors open, you wait five minutes and then you take these girls and you run. You keep running and you don't look back."Her face was in complete shock."What about you?"Her eyes were scared, yet she was determined."I said to run and do not look back. Don't worry about me, just know you will see home again. These girls will return home. Understand?" She nodded her head and she followed through.I thought my plan would fail, but to my surprise, it worked, and it haunts me every night as I dream of what happened. I never told anyone how I rescued those girls, and I am not proud, but they got to see another day. Unfortunatel
Last Updated : 2021-03-08Illegal Love Chapter 3
Eight years later...There was a long period of time where I had lost the strong girl that would do everything in her power to make a point. To prove that I was better than anyone. If I didn't have a son to protect in all this, I would spend each and every day trying to escape. Yet if I made the wrong move like I did the first time, there's a chance my son would lose his mom, or worse he would get hurt. But there comes a time when enough is enough, and it starts today. I was folding clothes in my room, like the good little wife I am, trying to fight back the vomit forming in my throat."Nadia, where are you?"that annoying voice that made my ears want to bleed rang out through the hallway."In the bedroom," I respond back while continuing to fold clothes.He walks into the room, slamming the door behind him."Change of plans, I need you to cook for five. Carter and Michael are joining."My back was still turned to his."I need to run to the store to collect more chicken if that's the c
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He slowly retracts his arms and steps back from me."What do you mean you're pregnant with my baby?"Carter stumbles over his words, running his hands over his ashy blonde hair until it is out of its normal flow."I think that covers it. I know it's not what you wanted but I won't get rid of it."He looks at me in shock and wraps me in his embrace again."I'd never ask you to do that, you should know that. I love you, Nadia."I let the heat from his body soothe the anxiety arising."I need you to stop being a coward and get us out of here, please. I can't do this anymore, and he is going to find out about this baby. I don't want this life anymore."Tears begin staining his shirt; I blame the hormones for making me so emotional. How are we going to get out of this situation? We've been on this emotional roller coaster for the past three years, and it feels like there is no winning. The pressure is on him to have to choose between his family, and some girl carrying his child."I am going
Last Updated : 2021-03-08Illegal Love Chapter 5
As the morning sunlight shone through the curtains, I was expecting to feel a warm body. Yet looking over to my left I saw nothing but an empty cold side of the bed. I hated how bland the sex was, but if I really wanted to pass it off, I had to fake it. Usually, he would wake me up to start the day, but today he let me sleep in. The first time, I was pregnant so he was more lenient with me. I head for the bathroom to hop in the shower. I let the hot water steam from the shower and onto my body. The door slams shut and cause me to jump. "You slept with him!" I turn around to see Carter raging. He is viciously stripping down then joins me in the shower."What the hell are you doing?" I yell at him as he backs me up onto the wall."I had to hear it all night, and I know you don't sound like that."The water is dripping from his body as he stares down at me."I am taking matters into my own hands, and me being his wife consists of pleasing him."His mouth turns into a scowl, and he suddenl
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We arrived home not long after, Carter was staying over because he was taking Carlos to the airport in the morning. “Son, go get ready for bed, and I better not find you on that tablet either.” He gave me an eye roll right before he ran upstairs. “I am pretty tired; I will see you tomorrow.” Carter headed upstairs, and here I was completely drained. I scurried up the stairs and was heading for my bedroom when I noticed the lamp was on. I slowly open the door to see Carlos in bed with the one and only, Erika. She works at one of the warehouses and has been sleeping with him for a while now. He never allowed her to sleepover, but of course, here they are. I was tired and I didn’t want to bother. I quickly changed then headed downstairs and slept on the couch. I had no energy to fight with him at this point. Sleep took over, but sleep wasn’t nice to me. I had the same dream all the time. Everything was dark, and I was back in the van with those kids. They were crying and I was defens
Last Updated : 2021-03-08
Latest chapter
Illegal Love Chapter 42
8 years later…I’d like to think that things have changed since I lost the love of my life, but they didn’t. Shortly after we booked our last-minute tickets to New Mexico. Things weren’t the same. For months and months, I was just separated from the entire world. Carter is amazing, but I was dumb enough not to appreciate it. We struggled getting a good place. Like we had everything, but I could only find comfort in him physically. I just wanted to feel love again. But it seemed that it never came. One day I told myself I need to fake that I’m okay, hoping that I’d trick my mind into thinking everything was okay. I fell pregnant again shortly after. Yes again. Giving birth to my now seven-year-old daughter Nelani. You can imagine what it’s like to have three kids. Slightly after she was born, things became rocky. Slowly Carter began to pull away from me. We got mar
Illegal Love Chapter 41
I spent my day training in the gym, while the kids were in school. I had a trainer help with my reflexes and attacks. I didn’t ask the guys because they’d end up turning it sexual, and quite frankly so would I. “Nadia, keep your eyes open when someone swings at you.” He went for another swing that I dodged, but I blinked again. “Listen, in that blink of an eye you will be open to an attack.” I was so tired I fell to the ground and laid on it. “Are you okay?” He asks. “I am drained, and my nerves are on fire. I think I am going to call it quits for the evening and go get my kids.” He reached his arm to lift me up. “You know most people that have me as a private trainer, do it because they’ve experienced something traumatic and they want to be in control.” I went to take a drink out of my canister. He wasn’t wrong. “I used to be able to protect myself really well.
Illegal Love Chapter 40
CamilaDays had flown by as I tried to understand how on earth, I let this happen. My boyfriend was dead. My sister hated me so much. I lost everything I cared for, and now it was time to end it all. I would never live safe as long as I was alive, but I wanted to keep living. I was going to live if it was the last thing I do. I grabbed my boyfriend’s burner phone with his cousin’s number. I unlocked it and hit the call button. It rang a few times. “Hey Zack, what’s up?” I was hesitant but it needed to be done. “Hey this is Zack’s girlfriend. I need your help.” I replied. “Where is my cousin Camila?” He asked. Tears poured down my eyes, as I had to be the bearer of bad news. “He’s dead. My sister killed him.” It went silent over the phone. I heard him breathing hard. “I am coming over.” The phone went silent. Not even thirty minutes passed
Illegal Love Chapter 39
This car repair was actually abandoned. But it looks like it’s still in service. It was in a place most people wouldn’t know of. Talon had thrown the guy over his shoulders and, carried him to a basement that looked like it’s was set up for torture. I knew Talon was dangerous, but he was so calm you would never think he was this way. He was the type of person who can’t forgive you if you do something intentionally to hurt. I’ve never seen that side, because even now he is calm. I don’t even know if I even want to see that side of him, I am sure it is scary. He sat him onto a chair, handcuffing his hands behind its back. We knew it would be awhile before he woke up. “So, mind telling me what happened?” He asked as he leaned against the wall. I was on the other side sitting on another chair. “I was walking back to my car when he had attacked me. As you can tell, I whooped his butt.” He smirked
Illegal Love Chapter 38
The next few days were quiet. I’d go to work, come home, different guys would be there. I’d take care of my kids and nothing more to it. The thing about it being way too quiet was the fact that it was quieter than it should be. I knew something was going to happen eventually. Carlos has been calling everyday with updates from people. We found out she was in Queens, New York. A place I never thought to look. But she is safe over there, until she isn’t. Camila was a rookie and thinks just by being far away surrounded by people who are considered dangerous it would protect her. She wasn’t safe anywhere. I know I am supposed to be focusing on the good, but my son being avenged was all I can think about that I forgot about my own anger. To the men who hurt me. To my husband who mistreated me. I was supposed to be a mad woman, but I was at peace. That’s what angered me because I should be angry. I should be taking my anger out
Illegal Love Chapter 37
I sat in the exam room waiting for the doctor to come in and just sign a prescription. Which means they make you get naked to examine everything and take your blood. The door opened and she came in. “Mrs.Lozano it’s nice to see you again. I see you’re here to get some birth control pills is that correct?” I nodded at her. “Are you just doing this short term, or do you plan to later on?” She asked. “I am about to be divorced with two men pining for me. Last thing I need is to bring another child into this world. Maybe later on but as of now I don’t want it to happen, and I happen to get pregnant by someone looking at me.” I joked. Which made the doctor laugh? “You know back in the days; men would find women with big hips. Big hips meant that they could bear children with no problems. It’s a good thing these are modern times, or then you’d probably have more children by now.”
Illegal Love Chapter 36
I’ve spent most of my time with Talon and I was ready to give him my all. I think the love I have for him grew into something stronger. I know Carter wants something more, but I can’t understand his reasons for breaking someone’s heart. I think honestly, I was trying to figure why he was rooting for us still, like things haven’t changed. He kisses me, and it’s like nothing changed. Things have changed, and I couldn’t let go of that one bit. Talon allowed me to figure things out, because it was never going to be an easy choice. With Talon things are so easy and comfortable. But with Carter, we are always fighting. Fighting over the same stuff, over and over. Fighting like there was still something to fight for. I felt like because we fought so much, and it turned into nothing that we deserve that chance. But I didn’t want to fight anymore. Fighting just makes things harder to end things. “Earth to Nadia, you okay?” I forgot that I had zoned out. Carter
Illegal Love Chapter 35
NadiaThe next morning, I felt as if I was at peace. I still had to find my sister, but at this moment, I wanted to enjoy it before it gets dark again. I got up and wrapped myself in my robe before I headed downstairs. Talon once again was cooking. Mika was sitting at the table already eating. “Good morning. You know this is my house, you don’t need to cook.” I walked over, wrapping my arms around him. “I want to, I built up an appetite last night.” He joked. Grabbing a cup of coffee, I sat next to Mika. “Hey kid, did you sleep well?” Mika had gotten up and sat on my lap. He was much like his dad, but also a momma’s boy. “Yeah, but there was screaming. I slept right after it ended.” Poor kid. A knock on the door was heard, before Carter walked in. Oh boy this was about to get awkward. “What are you doing here?” I asked him. He sat down in front of me, before taking my piece of bacon. “You asked me to take Mika today, that you w
Illegal Love Chapter 34
NadiaYou ever start a puzzle and not stop working on it for as long as it takes. Then suddenly once you get to the end, you lose that last piece? That was me putting myself back together again. I moved into my own place with my son Mika. I made sure Carter and Talon both knew I wasn’t ready to date, and that they should start doing things at their own pace. Focus on themselves, go out and date. It was good if they moved on as it took me a long time to get to a good place. Learning how to co-parent and manage going to work. I’ve been seeing a therapist for my postpartum. But although things seem to be better, I will always hold onto so much anger. But at this point in time, I needed to start moving on and allowing myself to open up. Everyone was spread out through my house, as we celebrated Mika’s birthday. I enjoyed this and seeing him so happy. “Is that a smile I see?” Talon joined me, leaning up
