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If Only
Last Updated : 2023-09-06
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Synopsis
Life was perfect for Alison Jade Jorgensen, an eighteen-year-old who had everything she could ever ask for - wealth, beauty, and attention. As the only child of a wealthy family, she was the apple of everyone's eye. Despite her privileged life, Alison remained an innocent girl, unaware of the harsh realities of the world. But everything changed when her beloved grandfather passed away a month before summer. Grief-stricken, Alison isolated herself behind the walls of her bedroom, unable to cope with the loss. Enter Jared Thompson, a twenty-five-year-old man who lived for nothing but pleasure. When Alison finally ventures out into the world, Jared becomes her distraction from the pain of her grandfather's passing. But what if Jared ends up causing more damage to Alison than she has already suffered? What if he becomes the source of her destruction?
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If Only Chapter 9: Took a Spin
Jared finished organizing his table while I awkwardly began picking up the fallen albums from the floor."You can just leave those there. I'll take care of them later," he offered, gesturing towards the albums still scattered on the floor.I nodded in response, not wanting to risk stumbling over my words."Would you like to join the others out there?" he suggested, causing me to turn my head and face him.The idea didn't sound too bad. After all, I had come here to unwind, and meeting new people might not be such a bad idea."That sounds nice," I replied, my voice barely audible.Jared pulled the curtain aside and stepped out of the room, and I followed suit. As I emerged, the first person I laid eyes on was Natalie, the blonde girl.I still couldn't quite comprehend why her eyes had such an intense effect on me. While others might describe them as having a gentle hue, if you were to gaze into them directly, you would discover a profound depth, much like Jared's.Jared and I garnered
Last Updated : 2023-09-06If Only Chapter 8: Clash
I turn each page, captivated by the diverse array of drawings all crafted by Jared.His skill in depicting the exposed forms of these women, who bared themselves exclusively for his artistic vision, is truly remarkable... although the notion of him having glimpsed the nakedness of multiple women does leave a disconcerting impression.My thoughts were drawn back to the moment he mentioned starting this collection of works when he was just 18. I couldn't help but notice the stack of albums resting on the chair beside us, and a curious thought emerged in my mind. I decided to voice my question, driven purely by my inquisitiveness."How old are you, anyway?" I asked, catching him off guard with the unexpected inquiry. His gaze shifted towards me, his expression betraying his surprise at the question.His arm rested on the back of the couch, hovering close to my shoulder. He composed himself, offering a slight shrug in response."I was 18 seven years ago... you can do the math," he replied
Last Updated : 2023-09-06If Only Chapter 7: Dust
As I parked the car at the curb, my mom was waiting for me at the door of our house. Jared and I had gone our separate ways the moment we stepped out of my Gramps' gate. I couldn't even bring myself to speak to him, let alone look at him. I just went the other way and never looked back, still confused about the way I acted in the closet. But why does it matter? Jared is probably just some random guy looking for girls to trap in his net and release them afterwards. I'm still feeling guilty for my actions. This is so not me. What if my Gramps were still alive and saw me acting this way? What would he think of me? I'd be disappointing him big time. As I looked to my side, I saw my father's car parked. That's another thing...my father is home now. Opening the car door, I locked eyes with my mother, who was still waiting for me on the porch. She sent me a sympathetic smile, which I returned, but awkwardly. "Your dad is waiting for you inside," she announced as I made my way to her.
Last Updated : 2023-09-06If Only Chapter 6: That's a First
I waited anxiously, anticipating the door to burst open and expose Jared and me. However, the darkness continued to envelop us in the small space of the closet, and the door remained firmly shut. I wondered what was going on. My father was still attempting to twist the doorknob, but it refused to move, just like earlier when I had tried to open it. I could hear my dad groaning in frustration, and I knew that we had bought ourselves some time. I moved away from the door, and Jared followed suit, his back pressed against the wall. His voice was barely audible when he whispered into my ear, "Whoa, slow down there." His words sent shivers down my spine, and I suddenly realized that my hands had instinctively grabbed onto the front of his shirt, pulling us closer together. I hadn't meant to do that, but the situation had escalated so quickly. However, our closeness became the least of my concerns when I heard my father's voice coming through the door. "This doorknob has been used enough
Last Updated : 2023-09-06If Only Chapter 5: Too Close For Comfort
I felt my patience wearing thin as his voice sounded behind me. It was the guy I had been avoiding, and I could already feel my annoyance rising to the surface."The last thing I remember, I was calling out for Chandler," I snapped, refusing to turn around and face him.I heard him chuckle, but it did little to diffuse my irritation. I wasn't in the mood for another argument, and I wasn't going to let him get the best of me this time."Chandler's not here, so you'll have to deal with me," he continued, his tone laced with smugness.I finally spun around to face him, ready to leave the scene. "My parents taught me not to talk to strangers," I shot back, my eyes involuntarily drawn to the tattoos on his arms that were so far beyond my control.As I looked at him, I noticed that he wasn't wearing the same coat he had on the first time we met. Instead, he wore a plain white shirt that revealed his arms, which were covered in tattoos of different shapes and figures. "Especially to those wh
Last Updated : 2023-09-05If Only Chapter 4: Chance Encounters
As I stomped my way back to the gate, rumbling words and wishing the worst possible things upon the stranger who had crossed my path, I couldn't help but feel like I had strayed from my usual demeanor. But encountering that guy had put me in a sour mood."Kid? Kid? Who does he think he is?"Just as I was about to enter the gate, a familiar voice spoke behind me, causing me to pause for a moment to process who it might be."Well, you don't look like you're having a good day."My heart skipped a beat as I recognized the voice. It was overly familiar, and it stopped me dead in my tracks. I turned around swiftly and practically ran over to where she was standing."Lizzy!" I exclaimed, wrapping my arms around her so tightly I was sure she found it hard to breathe."Woah, Woah, Woah... you big piece of bear..." Lizzy chuckled, complaining about my tight embrace. But she knew she couldn't blame me. We hadn't seen each other in months.After I finally pulled away from her, my mouth ran with q
Last Updated : 2023-09-05If Only Chapter 3: The Encounter
I couldn't let him get away with this. Not when it was my family's property that he was destroying. So, without a second thought, I strode up to him, my head held high in defiance."Excuse me?" I called out, my voice echoing across the yard. The guy stopped in his tracks, his head snapping in my direction. For a moment, he just stared at me, his expression unreadable.My heart was pounding in my chest, and I could feel the adrenaline coursing through my veins. But I refused to back down. I had caught him red-handed, and he was going to pay for what he had done.I stood there, straightening my shoulders as if trying to hold in the fear that was creeping up my spine. He was trouble, that much was clear. His face was etched with lines of mischief and defiance, and yet there was something familiar about him, something that made me want to trust him, despite every instinct telling me to run."Am I interrupting you?" I asked, my voice trembling slightly as I raised an eyebrow in what I hope
Last Updated : 2023-09-05If Only Chapter 2: Agonizing Remembrances
I slowly descended the stairs, taking in every word my mom said, and the weight of her voice seemed to grow heavier with every passing moment. My heart sank at the mention of my grandparent's house. The thought of it being in a state of disrepair filled me with an overwhelming sense of sadness. "What do you mean?" I asked, hoping that maybe it wasn't as bad as she made it seem. "I mean, the house has been neglected for a while now. There are cracks in the walls, the roof is leaking, and some of the windows are broken. I didn't want to tell you before, but I think you need to see it for yourself." I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes. The thought of my grandparent's home falling apart was almost too much to bear. It was the one place where I always felt safe and loved, and now it was in shambles. I almost want to go immediately, but a sharp pain slices through my chest like a knife, and suddenly I'm flooded with questions. Am I really ready for this? Can I handle facing the
Last Updated : 2023-09-05If Only Chapter 1: Emerging From Isolation
2015I always used to look forward to summer, the warmth of the sun on my skin and the endless possibilities that came with it. But now, here I am, lying on my bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. The weight of grief is suffocating, and I can't seem to shake it off.My Gramps, my father's father, was my rock. He was the one who taught me how to ride a bike, and how to make the perfect grilled cheese sandwich. He was my confidant, the one I could always turn to when life got too overwhelming. But now, he's gone, and my world has turned upside down.The ends of my hair tickle the sides of my neck, a constant reminder of the drastic decision I made in the throes of grief - cutting off my long locks without a second thought. It was an impulsive move, but somehow it felt right. Grief has a way of making us act without thinking, as long as it matches the pain we feel inside.My grandfather's death was sudden and unexpected, and it's left me feeling empty and lost. For months, I've been trap
Last Updated : 2023-09-05
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Prologue
The mere thought of losing someone so dear was once an absurd concept to me, something I couldn't quite fathom. But now, now that I have experienced it, I understand the depth of the pain that comes with it.It was the day my grandfather passed away that my world was turned upside down. He was my confidante, my mentor, my friend. He was the only one who ever truly understood me, who always knew how to make me feel better. His death was like a dagger to my heart, and the wound never truly healed.Every day is a struggle, a constant battle to keep myself together. I can't even begin to imagine the person I would be if I lost someone else. The mere thought of it makes me shudder.I rarely leave my room, and when I do, it's only to go through the motions of life. I barely speak to anyone, and the laughter that once came so easily is now a distant memory. I can't even bring myself to visit my grandparents' house, the place that held so many happy memories.I am different now, a shadow of t...
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