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Bad Feeling
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I See You, Rockstar Suffering
I stared at the big and orange setting sun in front of me. The sky was a mixture of pink, purple, and orange colors. I was standing in front of the big window of Dr. Baller's office, wearing my original clothes early this morning while my hair was put in a loose bun. My arms were crossed in front of my chest while watching the sun to slowly bid its goodbye for the day.I was the only person in the office because I had to change clothes from the hospital gown I wore all day. The nurse who assisted me told me, Dr. Baller and my guardian, Auntie Bernadeth and maybe Bailey, would meet me in this office to discuss the results of my tests.The check-up went a bit longer than usual. And by that simple fact, I already knew that some bad news would greet me at the end of this day.I hadn't seen Aunt Bernadeth and Bailey after I was subjected to a mammogram or a breast x-ray. That was maybe after lunch. Then, I underwent a full blood test and some other medical tests to check for my vitals.It
I See You, Rockstar Craving for His Comfort
The cold breeze of the wind and the darkness of the night wrapped around me as I stood at the edge of the rooftop. I held on tightly to the railings that reached high up to my waist. The railing was the only hindrance I had to not take a step foot forward and fall from this tall height.I didn't know how many hours I'd been here on the rooftop of my dorm building, standing and watching the people below me, busy with their lives. As soon as I came from the hospital, I went straight here.From this height, it was easy to see how people tried so hard in living this life. Everything was fast-paced and everyone was trying not to get left behind. That's how normal life works; it's about worrying how to keep up in this fast-paced world.My grip tightened on the rooftop railings at the same time as the anger I was feeling intensified. I was already delayed in my life because of my cancer. The people I was with when I started had left me behind. I had missed too many opportunities because of
I See You, Rockstar Breakfast
I woke up a bit dazed. The first thing that came to my mind the moment I opened my eyes was about the biopsy results that would come in the next day.I closed my eyes again as I instantly felt sullen. I swore to myself yesterday not to think about the biopsy results and just continue living my life, but here I was, thinking about it, first thing in the morning."Wake up, Sweetie. Time to eat."I was stunned with the voice I heard. The next thing happened, a strong set of arms immediately wrapped around my body. I almost forgot that Rupert stayed the night in my dorm. "So, you really slept here last night?" I asked him,grateful that my voice sounded livelier than my real mood.He kissed my temple before the tip of his nose brushed on my cheeks. He was beside me and his body was slightly hovering over mine. "You don't want me to leave. I was supposed to leave at dawn but you stopped me."My mouth dropped open and I remembered what he was referring to. I thought I was dreaming. "I ten
I See You, Rockstar Something Vague
“Can you take me from behind, Rupert? You know, me on four while you are taking me from behind.”He swallowed hard at what I said. Then he greedily squeezed my behind. A shudder ran down my spine when he deliberately slipped his hand into my womanhood. He cupped my core before saying, "As you wish." He handed me the plate of food that sat on the small table next to my bed. "Now, eat. Eat more so you don't faint while I fuck you, doggystyle,” he said darkly, igniting my desire and anticipation.I was a bit flustered hearing him say that, doggystyle, but at the same time, I was turned on.I left from sitting on his lap and took a seat next to him. Rupert gave me the plate of food he prepared for my breakfast slash lunch. "Where are you going?" I immediately asked when he stood up when I was ready to eat.I watched him as he moved behind me and sat there. "Rupert?"The next thing I knew, Rupert's fingers delicately wrapped around my hair, taking all of the strands in a grasp. Then I fel
I See You, Rockstar There's Us
Crowded, loud, and blinding. That's how the bar greeted me the moment I stepped inside. Rupert came here earlier than me because he and his band had to set up the instruments while I finished first the articles I had to read on Rupert’s condo. I also made a draft for our mockup debate with the debate team today so I kinda didn’t notice the time.I was almost two hours late from the time Rupert asked me to come. So I was not surprised when his band was no longer performing."Where is he?" I tried to call him but he was not answering his phone. There were also too many people so it's hard to find where he was. In the end, I decided to go to the bar counter and send another message to Rupert.I waited for his reply or call but after almost thirty minutes of waiting, there's none. I gasped at the thought that they might have left. Maybe he was not able to wait for me because I was too late?I groaned in frustration. Why didn't I become mindful of the time?I asked for a lady's drink fro
I See You, Rockstar Try Me
"This song is for you, Sweetie. Thank you for coming tonight. Can I say it now? Ah ..." He stopped strumming for a while only to say, "I love you, Meredith Kaye. Please believe me."Rupert continued to strum the guitar he was holding and his beautiful voice soared and embraced everyone in the club.| It's 12 o'clock and I need your attention |My vision became blurry as Rupert serenaded me with the most sincere intention. His voice embraced my racing heart. I could not believe he felt something for me. I really thought this was going to be unrequited. I was happy to hear it from him ... That he loves me and that he was willing to move on from his past to love me. I know it's hard. Ava was only gone for only a year but here he was willing to try it out with me.However, my tears fell and couldn't stop when Rupert's face became clearer— little by little, his face became recognizable. The features of his face became distinct.My mouth dropped open with sobs.| If tonight ever makes a di
I See You, Rockstar Assurance
The confession we had about each other’s feelings ignited the desire and pleasure. He loves me and I love him too. There's a mutual understanding and feelings between us and I ... I couldn't get any better than now. At some point, I forgot about everything. It's just me and Rupert and our little bubble. When we got to his condo unit, he immediately picked me up. I was cupping his face with my both hands as he carried me straight to his bedroom. I just dropped the bag I was carrying on the floor and I was the one who removed the guitar hanging behind him. I was staring at him and so was he. "Do you really see me now?" His breathing was fast and shallow, intently staring at me. "This is a miracle," I murmured, the pad of my thumb touching the piercing on his soft lips and my gaze memorizing every feature of his face. "I don't know what happened. But I just suddenly saw you. I see you, my Rockstar." I heard the bedroom door click after Rupert closed it. He slowly approached the bed
I See You, Rockstar What if I don't?
"Why?" I asked Rupert.I heard him sigh and then his arms wrapped around my waist. He made me sit on his lap and then kissed my chin.I bit my bottom lip, trying my hardest not to cry out of my frustrations and disappointments. I lifted both my hands to cup his face. "I thought I will forever see you, Rupert." My hands caressed both of his cheeks. I leaned my face closer to see his eyes. "I saw you last night. I can't be wrong, Rupert."My fingertips touched his eyes down to the tip of his nose and then to the cold metal ring on his lips. I clearly remembered what he looked like. But then, I woke up today only to see his blurred face again. My heart ached."Rupert," I sobbed. I could no longer hold back the tears. I was so happy last night— and now, it turned out, it was just for a while. "N-Not again ... I-I can’t see you again. W-Why?"All my life, I thought I was okay with myself not seeing people's faces. I got used to it. I was so used to it that it became part of my system; to
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