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"Why?" I asked Rupert.I heard him sigh and then his arms wrapped around my waist. He made me sit on his lap and then kissed my chin.I bit my bottom lip, trying my hardest not to cry out of my frustrations and disappointments. I lifted both my hands to cup his face. "I thought I will forever see you, Rupert." My hands caressed both of his cheeks. I leaned my face closer to see his eyes. "I saw you last night. I can't be wrong, Rupert."My fingertips touched his eyes down to the tip of his nose and then to the cold metal ring on his lips. I clearly remembered what he looked like. But then, I woke up today only to see his blurred face again. My heart ached."Rupert," I sobbed. I could no longer hold back the tears. I was so happy last night— and now, it turned out, it was just for a while. "N-Not again ... I-I can’t see you again. W-Why?"All my life, I thought I was okay with myself not seeing people's faces. I got used to it. I was so used to it that it became part of my system; to
Prosopagnosia had no cure. It was a permanent neuro-degenerative disease affecting my facial recognition system. I had this when I was a kid— my neurologist diagnosed me as being born with it. It's a genetically-induced condition, for my case."That's already a miracle, Meredith. People born with prosopagnosia tend to have the least chance to see anyone's face. Most people, throughout their lives, haven't had a chance to see the faces of people important to them."I stared at Dr. Gregorio Baller, Aunt Bernadeth's second husband. He had been my neurologist since I was a kid. He knew my prosopagnosia like the back of his hand.After I told him what happened last night, he told me it was a miracle. I was stunned. The anger I felt earlier subsided."You already experienced a miracle for a prosopagnosia patient, Meredith. The fact that you can still see people's facial features at some point when you move your face closer to them was a miracle already." Greg held my hand and tapped it as a
"I beg to disagree, Ms. Debate genius." My forehead furrowed as he stood up in his seat as if he were really debating. "Isn't it nice to know people without looking at their physical beauty but to look at what's inside their hearts? Isn't it nice to be casual and friendly with everyone, even with your enemies? Is it nice to not see people faking smiles and rolling their eyes at you?"I smirked. "In all the questions you'd asked, ‘no’ is my answer. None of them are nice or good to experience." I sighed before smiling bitterly. "You'll only look stupid and people will take advantage of you.""Isn't it nice to love a person with your heart and your heart alone?" Gelo sat on the chair before he gave me a salute. "You're doing just fine, Meredith. Don't discredit all the efforts you've done to live a normal life just because of your prosopagnosia and that lump in your chest. Not everyone can handle what you've successfully conquered.""But I think it's back," I said weakly before lowering
Why does someone leave? Why does someone leave a person behind? Why does someone leave without giving a proper goodbye?"People don't come and go. But people choose when to come and when to go." Rupert stood up. It's time for him to say his argument and defend their group's stance; a person leaves because he hates the person he has to leave behind. "If you love a person, there's not enough reason to leave. But if you hate a person, that hate is enough drive you to walk away. It's simply because hatred fluorish anger and then destruction."Hatred is a strong emotion. When you feel angry, it will eat away at your logic and right thinking. Then, you'll end up doing the wrong things and irrational decisions.I've been there."I've been there," Rupert continued, putting me into a halt. My gaze stayed on his blurry face as he carried on, "I hated you, Meredith. I was so close to leaving."I was stunned by what Rupert said. I blinked multiple times before I was able to process what he just s
I slowly walked into the hospital church. I expected it but it still hurts. My biopsy results stated it was malignant and the stage of my cancer was in grade two or three. Further tests would be conducted to assess my cancer's grade. Eian suggested mastectomy again as my only way to free myself from the curse of cancer. I think that's what bugs me the most. Wasn’t it enough that I would go through the fight against cancer again? Why did I even have to remove my breasts? When I was in the first row of seats, my cellphone in my pocket vibrated. I checked it and my heart ached to see my Dad's name on the caller ID. "I'm sorry, Pa." I turned off my phone. Right now, I wanted to be alone first. I wanted to deal with the turmoil in my mind and the heavy pain in my heart by my own. I just wanted a time to accept my biopsy results. I sat on the empty pew in the second row and turned my gaze at the big cross in the middle of the church's altar. The hands on my lap turned into fists whi
"This is more emotionally and mentally difficult than what I thought. I cried a lot last night. It's hard to accept it. It's hard to believe it." I chuckled, placing my hand on top of the white marble. I traced her etched name on the surface as if I was touching her face. "Mom, do you think I can handle it again? Can I survive for the second time around? I am hurting Papa again."I sighed before a small smile returned to my lips. I was sitting on the grass, across from my mother’s grave. Yesterday, my biopsy result revealed that my cancer came back and I had to deal with it again. Rupert was there with me to receive the bad news. But I asked him to leave and give me my 'me' time to process everything."I met a guy, Ma. His name is Rupert. I've done a lot of crazy things with him and I'm sure you're going to scold me big time if you’re still here," I laughed at my own story. The first day I met Rupert came back. He was my definition of living freely back then. I took the risk with him
"I have to undergo chemo and then surgery to remove my tumor. Then, I have to undergo radiotherapy after the surgery." "I will hold your hand throughout those treatments, Meredith. I will always be waiting for you outside the therapy room and the surgery room," he said, making me immediately smile even more. He interlaced our fingers together and then kissed the back of my hand. "After your treatment, we will have our church wedding." I took a deep breath. I needed to tell him. "My doctor suggested mastectomy." He stiffened. And that scared me. "My doctor said I am susceptible to the recurrence of my cancer because of my genes. He thinks mastectomy can be a help to free myself from the curse of cancer. Both of my breasts will be removed," I said without even blinking an eye. He was silent and the bitter feeling instantly caved in. He removed his head from leaning on my shoulder and he also let go of my hand. My eyes immediately stung. When he faced me, I was quick to lower my
One year ago …"Congrats, Edith. A year has passed. I don't think you should worry anymore. Everything is going to be okay from here.”I looked at Bailey because of what she said. I nudged her side before getting off of the car's passenger seat. I turned around at the driver's seat and then peeked at the window. "Five years, Bailey. Eian said— I mean Dr. Baller, I have to be healthy for five years straight to say I don't really have cancer anymore," I reminded her before sighing a deep breath."One year was still a long time," she replied to me before patting my forehead. "It's not because the standards are five years to say you're cancer free, you're invalidating the one year you're healthy. You should be thankful for that."I frowned at her before playfully swatting her hand away which was patting me like a kid. "One year is only twenty percent of the five years. A lot more can happen. I still can't figure it out. My cancer can still come back.""Stop your negativity. You're ruining