"Clearly telling you I love you every day isn't enough. For some fucked up reason, you don't believe I will always love you, no matter what dumb shit we go through," I said, willing her to believe that that was as true today as it had been that night in Prague. Baby, remember how we brought down our walls for each other and you shared everything with me that night. Remember how we made plans together as partners. Come home and share with me again. Let me fix what he broke in you. No matter what, I'll always be your friend. A sharp intake of breath as she sought to hide her emotions. The outrage on Don Angelo's face said he noticed, despite her hooded eyes. "Look at what I'm willing to do to get us back to that. I'm sacrificing my only son to make you the best you can be. To make you strong again," said Don Angelo, his voice gentle and coaxing, like a loving father's. This was his fucked up way of saying he loved her, wasn't it? Using murder to try and bind her to you isn't sa
"You sleep on your tummy, never any other way, unless I'm holding you. Does he know that? Parties make you uncomfortable, but you'd never know it because people love you. Does he know that? You have a photographic memory and consume textbooks at an alarming rate, hence the near perfect GPA. Does he know that? You suck at being a barista, but you keep getting jobs at coffee shops. Does he know that? The closest thing you've ever come to seeing a rom com is literally The Dark Knight Trilogy. Does he know that? You think ice cream cakes are stupid and refuse to have them on principle even though that's just ice cream, you freak. Watching movies with you is a nightmare, because you know the ending within minutes of it starting. Does he know that? You are the smartest, most fun, most beautiful girl in any room." I was absolutely floored. As he took a deep breath, I risked a look at him, trying to get myself to be rational. He was staring right back. He was my best friend. Knowing all of th
Kenny always says that I'm girlfriend goals for Scott, because we never argue. Well we were about to debunk that myth on the side walk of a busy New York road. "I have to go," I said, making my way to the door of the bakery. Conflicting thoughts went through my head. I knew, with absolute certainty, that the door to me coming back to New York or having any sort of life outside of being Luca's wife would close when I got on that plane. But what choice did I have now that I'd exposed Scott's existence to the entire mafia?"Stacy, wait," I heard Scott call out to me. I couldn't see his face, but I was so caught up in my own feelings that it wouldn't have mattered what he looked like anyway. Behind the fear and the paranoia, I was just exhausted. Trying to run from being Don Angelo's daughter had drained me. Something in me snapped and I exclaimed, "You're not going to change my mind. This wedding is happening." Even as I said the words, briskly walking to keep Scott from catching up
Earlier that day… "I think you're being a little bitch," said Willow, sipping on her smoothie. "You've said that already. Thanks for siding with your brother by the way," I said, nudging her gently. Not two hours after walking away from Stacy, I picked Willow up at the airport. She was here for the weekend, checking out NYU to see if she might want to go here next year and I was showing her around. Seeing Stacy upset had caused me physical pain, a tightening in my chest, but I needed to get away from her. It felt like there was nothing else to say. She was going to do what she was going to do. That was probably the anger talking, but I didn't want to hurt her by saying something I couldn’t take back. So I left. Now the whole thing was haunting me. "You didn't let me finish. You're being a little bitch and I think it's great. Fantastic in fact," Willow continued, as we walked the same paths I used to walk with Stacy. "I went on live television and declared how well I know her. Wel
"I'm home. Where's the new girl?" Kenny called out, the distinct rattle of his keys being set down on the counter reaching me in the living room. He walked into the room at the same time as Scott and the brunette. My insides turned and twisted in on itself when I saw Scott. We awkwardly looked away at the same time. "Stace? But you're supposed to be—" Kenny cocked his head to the side in confusion. "Nevermind her, we're going anywhere that's not here," said the brunette, grabbing her coat off the couch and forcing Kenny to backtrack. "We'll pick the one when I get back?" she said, looking back at me with a smile, sounding excited.It had taken me all this time to place her voice, having only ever heard it over Zoom calls. I took a step forward and looked her in the eye for the first time since getting here. "Willow Brady?" I exclaimed, covering up my surprise with a quick smile. "Yes, of course. I may have found you something even better than what we talked about."So this was the
"So what exactly do you do for the mafia that has your dad calling you back every couple of months?" Stacy scrunched up her face, hesitating. By now she had detailed her father's entire operation. What was one more thing? I knew more details than I was comfortable with knowing. Was knowing this shit safe? Sleep would not come easily tonight. This was the last question I got to ask Stacy before Kenny and Willow walked through the door at one in the morning. "Parrrr-ttttyyy," they howled together, stumbling through the door. "Willow Eleanor Brady, are you drunk?" I asked, getting up from my seat at the island to follow her into the living room. "I guess that's my cue to leave," Stacy mumbled behind me, taking the opportunity to get up too and duck her head. "Full naming me, I see cool bro mode is not active," said Willow, dragging Kenny's inebriated body to the couch and dumping him onto it."I'll see you both tomorrow," said Stacy, her eyes pleading for me not to ask my question a
"Boys are stupid," I said to no one in particular, as I entered my apartment. I couldn't really blame Scott for freaking out after everything I laid at his feet last night. Still, it would have been nice if Willow didn't find out like that. My past brought me no joy. In fact, I was ashamed of it. Now that it was all out there, I felt like Scott was judging me. How did he expect me to tell him my most personal shame? Aren't we all entitled to some secrets? As I went from the kitchen to the living room turning on the lights in the apartment, something immediately struck me. My study's door was open. I know I closed it before I went shopping with Willow this morning. The cushions on my couch were all at different angles. Passing the coffee table with quiet careful steps, I made my way over to the corner of the room where my bookshelf was located. I slid my fingers along the books until I found the one I wanted, pulled it out, opened it up and took my gun out of the hollowed out Physics
I watched her frame rise as she took a deep breath. I had turned the flash of my camera off after some nasty looks over her shoulder, but she was still painfully aware of me. How could she not be? It was a Sunday and this was a library. The place was a ghost town.Of course, I knew she would break any minute now, even if I was sitting a few chairs away from her. In the meantime, I wasn't complaining. It had been some time since I had last gotten a picture of her.She was sitting at a desk filled with textbooks, pulling her hair into a bun and piercing it with a pencil, before opening the book in front of her. It was her little ritual before she started studying. "Three, two, one," I counted her down. No sooner had I finished when she turned to me, her cheeks tinted a light pink, and whisper yelled, "Stop that. You're annoying me.""Permission to approach?" I asked.Not waiting for an answer, I jumped up and went to her. To piss her off just a little more, I took another snap, this ti
"Clearly telling you I love you every day isn't enough. For some fucked up reason, you don't believe I will always love you, no matter what dumb shit we go through," I said, willing her to believe that that was as true today as it had been that night in Prague. Baby, remember how we brought down our walls for each other and you shared everything with me that night. Remember how we made plans together as partners. Come home and share with me again. Let me fix what he broke in you. No matter what, I'll always be your friend. A sharp intake of breath as she sought to hide her emotions. The outrage on Don Angelo's face said he noticed, despite her hooded eyes. "Look at what I'm willing to do to get us back to that. I'm sacrificing my only son to make you the best you can be. To make you strong again," said Don Angelo, his voice gentle and coaxing, like a loving father's. This was his fucked up way of saying he loved her, wasn't it? Using murder to try and bind her to you isn't sa
"Do you want me to shut him up, boss?" the guy behind me asked. "If you fucking touch him, I'll put a bullet in you," she said, her voice hoarse but stern. She still wouldn't look at me, but the words had my heart soaring with hope. "Oh that's hilarious. Do you actually think some boy with puppy dog eyes is going to make you any less my heir?" Don Angelo's poisonous voice filled the air, followed by a boisterous laugh. Don't focus on him. Focus on her. Don't think about being in a desperate tug of war for her love with the mad man controlling the guns. It only mattered that she was the one controlling him. Baby, how strong is your love for me? Is it stronger than his hold on you? "How many times do you have to hear that you're mine, baby? Obviously that includes this. Oh and I love you too," I said with a calm smile, blocking Don Angelo's presence out to lay my heart at her feet one more time. This one was a reference to a moment we had in the coffee shop where she worked
I thought back to Prague, when she didn't believe that I loved her. That was what my girl needed now. To believe she was loved, despite her holding her own brother at gunpoint. If I couldn't sell it, Luca and I were dead men. I didn't know if Luca believed what he said, but he was right. Don Angelo and Stacy weren't a them. Not yet. Not until she pulled that trigger. Whether Don Angelo knew it or not, despite him giving her orders, he gave her all the control. She was in charge. That was the cost of begging for her love. She took you over completely. Who knew better than me? This was her party. Luca, Don Angelo and I were just guests. What was it that got her to put away the dull eyes in Prague and believe then? I know I fucked her, but that wasn't it. She wouldn't have let me inside her if she didn't believe I loved her first. I could feel my heart beating in my chest as fear caught up with me and I finally opened my mouth to speak to her. Baby, please use your brilliant
"Spare me," he croaked out. "Please don't kill me, Stacy." My eyes wouldn't let me look at him. I was scared shitless. Of her. Of my beautiful girl. Shook to the core. Then Don Angelo spoke and the anger returned with a vengeance. "You're a little early, Scott. You don't mind if we finish up here before we get to you, do you? Don't worry, you're next," said Don Angelo, throwing me a manic smirk. The sick fuck was having the time of his life. She took her eyes off the man on the ground to look towards me, but the soulless eyes remained. She was looking right through me. Like I didn't mean shit to her. "Don't," Luca seethed, keeping his voice low. "No sudden movements. You want to be useful? Use your head. Fucking talk to her." That look. Those dull eyes. I knew what came next. If I opened my mouth, she'd be in pain. "Hi Luca. Long time no see. Thanks for gift wrapping yourself for me. Our little spat was becoming a nuisance. We'll deal with you after Scott," said Don Angelo, h
Jeff didn't trust me for shit. He had a tracker sewn into my jacket before he left to check out a lead this morning. That came after I defied him multiple times to check out possible places Don Angelo may be with Luca. As was the case once again. The real question was how long would it take him to realize Luca and I were both missing? "I mean they're the ones with the guns, but sure," I said, shaking my head as I threw him a glance. "These guys? Mere foot soldiers. I'm not worried about them," Luca said nonchalantly. "What worries me is what you'll say when you come face to face with your worst nightmare." "Shut up and walk," the guy behind us said, nudging Luca with his gun. What was I going to say to her? No matter how desperately I wanted this, I wasn't ready to see her and I knew it. Despite Luca's warnings about what was coming, my brain was far too fixated on the reunion. It was skipping right past the life and death situation we were in. I didn't have a plan. I hadn't bee
An overwhelming surge of affection hit me like a tidal wave, drenching me to the bone in love. His love meant having a conscience though. The horror of me standing over my near defenseless brother hit next, making my hands shake so hard I almost dropped the gun. "Shut your fucking mouth, you annoying, whiny, idiot," said Don Angelo, pulling up in a Jeep. I couldn't do this. This wasn't me. Not anymore. There were fates worse than death. Being by Don Angelo's side for life. Being without Scott. He wouldn't understand. He wouldn't love me anymore. I can't live in a world where you don't love me, Scott. "Dad please. Make her stop. She deserves this, not me. She's the traitor," Joey cried, raising the gun at me with shaky hands. Before I knew it, Don Angelo was by my side, breathing down my neck. Waiting for me to perform. "Seven shots. Do me proud. Make them count," said Don Angelo, kicking the gun out of Joey's hand. "Such creative choices. Where would you like the next
Jeff was going to lose his shit when he found out what I walked into despite him expressly forbidding me from accompanying either him or Luca. "A psychotic murderer wants his apprentice to kill you. Just because you happen to be sleeping with her, doesn't mean you should be stupid enough to go near her right now, Scott," Jeff preached to me just this morning. In hindsight, he was probably right. Based on Luca and I losing the shoot out that ensued when we finally found the right place, I'd say we were dead men walking. Even if I knew how this would play out beforehand, I'd have come out here to find her regardless. Was it stupid that I was happy about seeing her soon? I could feel myself becoming calmer with every step I took towards her. Three fucking days of torturing myself with where she was, how she was, whether she was dead or alive. I was just relieved to know that I'd found her. Stupidly hopeful despite the implications of what three days in a place like this could do to
I can't remember who you are, but baby you could take a girl to hell and make her beg to stay. Because I was in hell and yet I just couldn't quit. Had to kiss him one more time. Hold his hand one more time. Hear him speak one more time. Stay awake. Stay alert. Next question: what was his name? Remember his name, Stacy. Remember his name. Distracted by apparitions of my mystery man, Joey caught me off guard, wrestling me to the ground. "Die, you traitorous bitch," he said, lowering the muzzle of his gun to my forehead. "That's sorella to you," I said, not hesitating to shove my gun into his groin and pull the trigger. He rolled off of me into the fetal position while covering his junk, refusing to let his gun go. I crawled to a tree and pulled myself up against it until I was on my feet again. "You could have shot my dick off. I'm going to fucking kill you, you crazy whore," he screamed in agony, blood pooling around his hands and gun. … You're not some conquest. You're
"I'm rooting for you, bella. Even after you broke my heart so many times. No matter though. We'll fix everything once you remember who you belong to," said his shrill voice moments before he took the gag off and cut the ropes around my wrists and ankles. Moments before he dumped me in this place that I soiled with blood many times, human and animal alike. The hallucinations were a bitch to deal with. The guilt from seeing everything I did all those years ago play out all around me weighed heavily on me. Once, I took out a guy's eye with a dart because he dared to win a game against Don Angelo. Another time I cut out someone's brachial plexus after he stole from Don Angelo. Honestly, the gunshot injuries, which were the norm, may have been more humane. "Always start with the kneecaps. Hurts like a motherfucker," said Don Angelo the very first time I held a gun with a man before me in these very woods. In an ideal situation, the ankles and elbows were next. It was never about slow