I was depressed. That wasn't out of context, I truly was depressed. Not only was I homesick, I was also in a constant state of anxiety. It's only been a few days since I met my mate. Despite the days being uneventful, a lot has happened within those days for me. I was in a constant battle with myself. My past was not much of a big help as it affects to my stand in life now. The role I am to play now also bothers me, this along to the thought of being Salazar's mate. Salazar. Wonderful, he truly is. I believe he just said what he said because he's only thinking of the future and for the good of the pack. Only his beliefs weren't my tea. And Jenny. The image of them both kissing came in my mind again and I was given another gut to the heart. We may have not marked each other yet but he was stating plans as mates, isn't that enough context that we belong to each other? For all I know he may even love her. All the much reason why I thought of rejecting him. I couldn't though. I wa
"Get on.""No.""Suerinity...""Salazar...""Just get on the bloody chair.""I told you... I don't want to get on the bloody chair.""You have to get on the wheel chair, Suerinity.""No, I don't have to. I can walk just fine.""No, you can't. You're still injured and any move you can make may open up your stitches.""What stitches are you talking about? I'm not injured in any way!""Yes, you are.""I am not! This is my body! You know my body more than me?""I can for sure see bruises on your skin.""It doesn't hurt.""Your wolf is still asleep. You're still weaker than usual.""My wolf is asleep but that doesn't mean I'm so weak I can't walk.""Just get on the chair so we can leave.""I can walk on my own if we want to leave."Salazar heaved a sigh of frustration at my resistance. I was sitting on the hospital bed while he held the wheel chair he was gonna settle me in. I can walk. I really can. I wasn't injured or anything, just a little weak but coping! If there was one thing I wasn
TRIGGER WARNING! MATURE CONTENT!!!Read at your own risk.'Not interested huh.''Oh shut up. You're happy with this too.'Patrice snickered at my remarks but purred at the taste of our mate's cooking. How did I know our mate cooked it? Well, we don't have a chef. I was happily eating when Seraphina jumped in the room, flustered. "I can't take it anymore!"I jolted when the door hit the wall in a bang and even stopped eating to look at her. 'What's up with her?''No idea. She's been like this since she arrived yesterday.'"Sue!" she was crying without tears when she came to me and gave me a hug. "Is anything.. alright?""No!" she screamed and stood and paced in front of me while playing with her fingers. "I have no idea how to come from this, I have no idea what to do! I want to be with him, but he is just---!""Wait--you met your mate?""No-I mean-""When?!""Gosh!" I watched her as she buried her face in her palms and slumped on my bed, face down. I looked at her weirdly while s
I couldn't look at my mate directly in the eye after he wiped my thighs and hands clean. When I stood up, my legs were wobbly that I held on his arm for support. "Careful now, Erin," his hands were on my waist to steady me. "Erin?""Others call you Sue. I wanted to call you by a name only I get to," his orbs were now back to olive as he held my chin. I was stuck in a daze with his eyes when he cleared his throat. "So, did you like it?""What?" I blushed and he chuckled. "The breakfast I made you.""Oh, yeah I did. Thank you by the way. I didn't think you would remember.""Why wouldn't I? You told me about it.""I didn't think you were listening.""You were talking. Of course, I would listen. Isn't that what we agreed on? That I'd listen to you?""Sorry. Just wasn't used to it.""So did you enjoy it?""Yeah, I did. The fried rice tasted just like how my mom would cook it.""I'm not talking about that breakfast."I hit his arm in embarrassment and he just chuckled before pulling me c
"Salazar? Is everything alright?" I walked closer to him and he just threw something to the side without breaking eye contact and without emotion in his face. "No problem here, Erin," he guaranteed and I had to stop myself from laughing. "Are you studying my favorite dish, Salazar?""Well, I figured it would be nice to give it a try. It would be nice to have a broad choices for our menu," he explained cool-y as he took off his apron. I had to clench my thighs together when his muscles flexed as he reached for the back if his ribbon. I had to look away from him in case I go to heat again. Although I had survived my first wave of heat, thanks to him, it doesn't mean it ends there. The purpose of going into heat is to push mates to mate and complete the bond. Thus, as long as I refuse and don't comply, my heat will come over and over until I give in. The wonder is how long I can stop myself when I'm not entirely ready. "How come your home early? How did your session go?""It went gr
"So, what was Jenny's punishment? And why are you punishing her?"Salazar wiped my thighs clean with a hanky before pocketing it. After Salazar have me a hickey, my heat came again and my mate was very willing to rid me of the pleasure. I was afraid this was becoming a habit of ours. "Her actions drove you by the edge of the cliff," he said with zero emotion in his voice. "I can't let it slide when I nearly lost you."Cue my heart going ba-dump. "But she's your friend since you were kids.""But she hurt my mate. No one gets away with that, love," he said and planted a kiss on my forehead ever so casually. "Where do you wanna eat?" "It's only 11, Salazar. I came here for my duties.""You're learning, I see," he nodded and walked to sit on his chair. "How about your duties as my mate? Any marking coming soon?""Funny.""I'm serious. I can mark you here now. The thought of you going to school where a lot of unmated wolves are does not sit very well with me. What if your heat comes aga
I was at lost of words. I was in shock. I was trembling as I cried while my mate held me closer to him. When his hands trailed from my shoulders down to my hands to hold them, I snapped and pulled myself away from him. I look at him with tears in my eyes while he remained emotionless. "I had to. I want to apologize but I couldn't help myself," I sobbed at what he said. "But it's done now." "No," my lips quivered when he reached for my face. "No." He looked at me helplessly. "Well, this was bound to happen anyway." I felt so helpless that I was hyperventilating. I felt numb. I felt beaten. Depressingly, everything seemed cloudy as Salazar picked me up and situated me in the car. He buckled my seatbelt before leaning closer to plant a kiss on his mark and I hissed at the sensation despite feeling some sort of void inside of me. I didn't know what to feel. What was I supposed to feel? Wasn't this the assurance I wanted? Wasn't this the assurance I needed? But he nee
It’s been a year. “Sue! Table 18, please.” “Coming!” I wiped my hands dry on my skirt before putting my hair in a bun and taking the tray of food settled on the countertop. I exited the kitchen and flashed Gabriella a smile as she took the orders of the customers. It’s been a year. “Quite a busy day today, Sue,” she grinned whilst chewing her gum, her eyes wrinkling at the sides. “Busy day means busy pockets, honey.” I walked to the 18th table and laid their order. “Is there anything else I can get you, sir, ma’am?” “Nothing more. Thank you.” “Sue, could you be a doll and attend to the dirty tables outside?” Victoria smiled while carrying dirty platters. Her wavy mint green hair was in a ponytail, swinging side to side. “Sure sure.” It’s been a year. It’s been a year since I went independent and on the run. It wasn’t easy at first, especially for a wolf whose nature is to be one with her pack. All the days and nights I spent myself crying, I’m glad everything seems to final
I was at lost of words. I was in shock. I was trembling as I cried while my mate held me closer to him. When his hands trailed from my shoulders down to my hands to hold them, I snapped and pulled myself away from him. I look at him with tears in my eyes while he remained emotionless. "I had to. I want to apologize but I couldn't help myself," I sobbed at what he said. "But it's done now." "No," my lips quivered when he reached for my face. "No." He looked at me helplessly. "Well, this was bound to happen anyway." I felt so helpless that I was hyperventilating. I felt numb. I felt beaten. Depressingly, everything seemed cloudy as Salazar picked me up and situated me in the car. He buckled my seatbelt before leaning closer to plant a kiss on his mark and I hissed at the sensation despite feeling some sort of void inside of me. I didn't know what to feel. What was I supposed to feel? Wasn't this the assurance I wanted? Wasn't this the assurance I needed? But he nee
"So, what was Jenny's punishment? And why are you punishing her?"Salazar wiped my thighs clean with a hanky before pocketing it. After Salazar have me a hickey, my heat came again and my mate was very willing to rid me of the pleasure. I was afraid this was becoming a habit of ours. "Her actions drove you by the edge of the cliff," he said with zero emotion in his voice. "I can't let it slide when I nearly lost you."Cue my heart going ba-dump. "But she's your friend since you were kids.""But she hurt my mate. No one gets away with that, love," he said and planted a kiss on my forehead ever so casually. "Where do you wanna eat?" "It's only 11, Salazar. I came here for my duties.""You're learning, I see," he nodded and walked to sit on his chair. "How about your duties as my mate? Any marking coming soon?""Funny.""I'm serious. I can mark you here now. The thought of you going to school where a lot of unmated wolves are does not sit very well with me. What if your heat comes aga
"Salazar? Is everything alright?" I walked closer to him and he just threw something to the side without breaking eye contact and without emotion in his face. "No problem here, Erin," he guaranteed and I had to stop myself from laughing. "Are you studying my favorite dish, Salazar?""Well, I figured it would be nice to give it a try. It would be nice to have a broad choices for our menu," he explained cool-y as he took off his apron. I had to clench my thighs together when his muscles flexed as he reached for the back if his ribbon. I had to look away from him in case I go to heat again. Although I had survived my first wave of heat, thanks to him, it doesn't mean it ends there. The purpose of going into heat is to push mates to mate and complete the bond. Thus, as long as I refuse and don't comply, my heat will come over and over until I give in. The wonder is how long I can stop myself when I'm not entirely ready. "How come your home early? How did your session go?""It went gr
I couldn't look at my mate directly in the eye after he wiped my thighs and hands clean. When I stood up, my legs were wobbly that I held on his arm for support. "Careful now, Erin," his hands were on my waist to steady me. "Erin?""Others call you Sue. I wanted to call you by a name only I get to," his orbs were now back to olive as he held my chin. I was stuck in a daze with his eyes when he cleared his throat. "So, did you like it?""What?" I blushed and he chuckled. "The breakfast I made you.""Oh, yeah I did. Thank you by the way. I didn't think you would remember.""Why wouldn't I? You told me about it.""I didn't think you were listening.""You were talking. Of course, I would listen. Isn't that what we agreed on? That I'd listen to you?""Sorry. Just wasn't used to it.""So did you enjoy it?""Yeah, I did. The fried rice tasted just like how my mom would cook it.""I'm not talking about that breakfast."I hit his arm in embarrassment and he just chuckled before pulling me c
TRIGGER WARNING! MATURE CONTENT!!!Read at your own risk.'Not interested huh.''Oh shut up. You're happy with this too.'Patrice snickered at my remarks but purred at the taste of our mate's cooking. How did I know our mate cooked it? Well, we don't have a chef. I was happily eating when Seraphina jumped in the room, flustered. "I can't take it anymore!"I jolted when the door hit the wall in a bang and even stopped eating to look at her. 'What's up with her?''No idea. She's been like this since she arrived yesterday.'"Sue!" she was crying without tears when she came to me and gave me a hug. "Is anything.. alright?""No!" she screamed and stood and paced in front of me while playing with her fingers. "I have no idea how to come from this, I have no idea what to do! I want to be with him, but he is just---!""Wait--you met your mate?""No-I mean-""When?!""Gosh!" I watched her as she buried her face in her palms and slumped on my bed, face down. I looked at her weirdly while s
"Get on.""No.""Suerinity...""Salazar...""Just get on the bloody chair.""I told you... I don't want to get on the bloody chair.""You have to get on the wheel chair, Suerinity.""No, I don't have to. I can walk just fine.""No, you can't. You're still injured and any move you can make may open up your stitches.""What stitches are you talking about? I'm not injured in any way!""Yes, you are.""I am not! This is my body! You know my body more than me?""I can for sure see bruises on your skin.""It doesn't hurt.""Your wolf is still asleep. You're still weaker than usual.""My wolf is asleep but that doesn't mean I'm so weak I can't walk.""Just get on the chair so we can leave.""I can walk on my own if we want to leave."Salazar heaved a sigh of frustration at my resistance. I was sitting on the hospital bed while he held the wheel chair he was gonna settle me in. I can walk. I really can. I wasn't injured or anything, just a little weak but coping! If there was one thing I wasn
I was depressed. That wasn't out of context, I truly was depressed. Not only was I homesick, I was also in a constant state of anxiety. It's only been a few days since I met my mate. Despite the days being uneventful, a lot has happened within those days for me. I was in a constant battle with myself. My past was not much of a big help as it affects to my stand in life now. The role I am to play now also bothers me, this along to the thought of being Salazar's mate. Salazar. Wonderful, he truly is. I believe he just said what he said because he's only thinking of the future and for the good of the pack. Only his beliefs weren't my tea. And Jenny. The image of them both kissing came in my mind again and I was given another gut to the heart. We may have not marked each other yet but he was stating plans as mates, isn't that enough context that we belong to each other? For all I know he may even love her. All the much reason why I thought of rejecting him. I couldn't though. I wa
Run. Breathe. Run. Run. Run. Breathe. I let out another howl as images of Harris and Michelle replayed in my mind. Red. I saw nothing but red. Despite the pain of being rejected by my mate, I still had the strength in me to run away as far from him as possible. I would stumble on a few tree branches from time to time but my anger along with my wolf's pushed me to go further. I was panting by the time I had shifted to my human self. I cried and screamed to the top of my lungs at the betrayal of my mate. Patrice whined and howled in pain before sulking in the corner of my mind, depressed at the rejection of our fated mate. 'Patrice,' I tried calling out to her but she ignored me. I sobbed. How could he? For months I have been trying to prove to him that I was worthy to be his mate, for months I put up with his judgement along with his friends' to get the validation I needed, to be accepted by my mate. My nails dug to the soil as I cried. I felt every bit of emotion I needed to f
I looked at my tired face in the mirror after a long day. My eyes gazed on the bags that were there, dropping to the flesh of my neck. My eyes lingered for a few moments as my fingers fidgeted on the sink. Tears fell ome by one and I splashed some water on my face before stripping my clothes off and getting in the tub. Taking a bath, my thoughts wandered off to the long day I had. From the moment I woke up this morning, nothing was good. Jenny showing up and my jealousy igniting. My valid feelings of not trusting my mate and yet they are invalidated over and over. The pressure. The expectations. I was barely in college and despite being literate, I wasn't trained to be luna. I had no knowledge in leading. Sure, I can learn but I just need time. Can't he see that? Can't anyone understand that?I was raised being more than just a woman to give babies to her mate. I was raised to become a woman of my own and I was still halfway there. After the incident with Harris, I had slowly pla