THREE

Malakas ang buntonghininga na pinakawalan ni Ziancio nang magising siya mula sa mahimbing na pagkakatulog. Hinawakan niya ang ulo at mariin na ipinikit ang mga mata habang pilit na binubura sa utak ang panaginip na bumabagabag sa kaniya.

 

"Damn it. It's happening again!" sigaw niya sa hangin habang nararamdaman ang init na bumabalot buong katawan. Bukas naman ang aircon ng silid niya pero pinagpapawisan pa rin siya dahil sa imaheng naglalaro sa kaniyang isipan.

 

He can't believe that he's still having the same dream he started having many years ago. Paulit-ulit at masyadong detelyado kaya kabisadong-kabisado na ng utak niya ang bawat pangyayaring naganap sa panaginip na 'yon. It was a dream about his secretary, Divine Hermona.

 

That dream was driving him crazy that he even had to book an appointment in a psychiatric clinic just to find out what's happening to him. His psychologist said there's a chance that he has romantic feelings for Divine. Hindi niya inaasahan mangyayari ang bagay na 'yon dahil inakala niyang isang katrabaho at kaibigan lang ang turing niya sa babae. Their relationship was supposed to be strictly professional, but everything changed when he began having recurring dreams about her. He never fantasized about a woman that way, not even his ex-girlfriend, so how is this happening to him now? Hindi niya malaman ang dapat gawin para maibalik ang sarili sa katinuan.

 

Tiningnan niya ang orasan sa bedside table. Masyado pang maaga para bumangon pero alam niyang hindi na siya makakatulog pa dahil sa panaginip na 'yon, kaya naman dumeretso na siya sa banyo para maligo. Hindi alintana ang lamig ng tubig na bumabagsak sa kaniyang katawan. Ipinikit niya ang mga mata habang iniisip kung kailan ba nagsimula ang problemang ikinahaharap niya ngayon.

 

It probably started that night when Marielle broke up with him. Naalala niya pa kung paano niya nilunod ang sarili sa alak dahil sa labis na pagkasawi ng kaniyang puso. Muntik na siyang mawala nang tuluyan sa sarili noong gabing iyon pero mabuti na lang ay dumating si Divine para asikasuhin at iuwi siya sa condo niya. He could remember how his assistant wiped his tears with her bare hand while telling him that everything was going to be alright, pero wala na siyang maalala pagkatapos no'n. He woke up in the morning, naked and alone with his head throbbing in pain. Palagi naman siya hubad kaapag natutulog kaya hindi na siya nagulat. The thing he couldn't explain that morning is why he feels unfamiliar marks on his body, as if they were from a night he can't remember. He had a lingering feeling of forgetting something truly important.

 

On that day, Divine was late for work for the first time and Ziancio asked her about that night. Iniisip niya na baka may alam ang assistant niya sa nangyari, but she told him that she witnessed nothing and she immediately left after bringing him home at that time. May tiwala naman siya kay Divine kaya naniwala rin siya noong sinabi nitong walang ibang naganap, but something was strange. He also noticed a subtle change in her since that day that he couldn't quite explain.

 

Nagsimula na siyang mapanaginipan si Divine gabi-gabi. It was not a normal dream. It was intense, hot, and passionate—a dream he never had with anyone. Napapanaginipan niya na hinahalikan ang labi at ang iba pang parte ng katawan ng babae na para bang totoong nangyari 'yon. Her moans in his dream keep repeating in his head and it is making him lose his mind. The dream was too vivid and he has no idea why the fvck he is having it every time he closes his eyes at night. He's starting to hate himself for having dirty dreams about his innocent and kind secretary who has high respect for him, but he couldn't do anything to stop himself from thinking about it.

 

Hindi niya namalayan na inabot na siya ng ilang minuto sa shower dahil sa labis na pag-iisip tungkol doon. Nang makabalik sa katinuan ang kaniyang pag-iisip, agad niyang kinuha ang twalya at lumabas ng banyo. He wore his formal attire before leaving his condo to drive his way towards his company.

 

Isang malaking building ng kilalang kompanya ang kaniyang pinasukan. Ang Lionna Inc, a clothing company that was founded by his family for generations and is now passed down to him. Agad na yumuko ang mga trabahador nang maglakad siya sa harapan nila para ipakita ang respeto kay Evan Ziancio Valdez, the famous Chief Executive Officer of Lionna Inc who is known as an extremely rich, intelligent, and handsome man that many women are desiring for themselves.

 

Dumeretso si Ziancio sa kaniyang opisina at halos hugutin ang hininga niya nang maabutan si Divine doon. Palagi niya naman nakakasama ang babae pero habang tumatagal, mas lalo siyang nahihirapan kontrolin ang isipan niyang nababaliw sa presensya nito.

 

Divine showed him an innocent smile when she saw him. Napalunok si Ziancio at mas itinuwid ang tayo. They are in their workplace, and he is her boss. He must not let his dirty mind ruin their professional relationship.

 

“Good morning, Sir Ziancio.” 

 

Tumango siya bilang tugon. “Good morning too, Miss Hermona.” bati niya pabalik dito at tumikhim.

 

Dumeretso siya sa desk niya at umupo sa swivel chair. He did his best to calm himself down and act like his focus is on his work for today.

 

"Sir, your coffee."

 

Umangat ang tingin niya nang iabot ni Divine ang tasa ng kape na inihanda nito sa kaniya. She is his assistant who knows and prepares everything he needs. A perfect partner who is both professional and caring to her co-workers. Palagi nang inihahanda ng babae ang kape niya sa umaga para iinumin niya na lang ito sa pagdating niya. Ever since Divine became his secretary, ang kape na lang na ibinibigay nito ang iniinom at hinahanap-hanap niya.

 

"Thank you," he said as he reached for the cup, accidentally brushing fingers with her as he took it. A strange sensation ran through him at their brief contact, but he managed to keep his composure. Gusto niyang murahin ang sarili nang maalala niya nanaman ang napanaginipan niya.

 

He took a sip of the coffee. Baka sakaling magising siya sa kabaliwan niya kung lulunurin niya na lang ang sarili niya sa kape.

 

"Are you alright, sir? Masama po ba ang pakiramdam mo? I can bring the nurse here in your office to give you a checkup." 

 

Hindi niya naiwasang mapatingin sa nagtatakang si Divine nang itanong siya nito. His brows furrowed because of confusion. Mukha ba siyang may sakit sa paningin nito?

 

“You don’t have to do that. I feel fine.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

Ibinaba niya muna ang tasa sa desk niya. Magsasalita na sana siya pero biglang lumapit si Divine at hinawakan ang noo niya para tingnan kung may mali ba sa kaniyang temperatura. Napalunok siya kasabay ng paninigas ng kaniyang katawan nang maramdaman ang palad nito.

 

"Namumula ka. Are you sick?" Divine looked really worried about it. Wala itong kaide-ideya sa tunay na dahilan kung bakit siya nagmimistulang kamatis ngayon.

 

He couldn’t help but look at Divine’s rosy lips while she’s talking. Kinagat niya ang ibabang labi at ilang beses napakurap. Sa sobrang pagkataranta ay mabilis niyang hinawi ang kamay ni Divine at muling umiwas ng tingin.

 

"I said I'm alright!” Nagulat siya sa sarili nang bigla siyang mapasigaw. Tumingin siya kay Divine at halos sabunutan niya ang sarili nang makita ang reaksyon nito sa pagtaas ng boses niya. He didn’t mean to raise his voice!

 

Ramdam niyang nabigla si Divine sa inasal niya. She stepped backwards to keep a distance from him, then lowered her head. "I-I’m so sorry. I was just checking on you..."

 

Nakaramdam siya ng matinding konsensya nang marinig ang nahihiya at natatakot na boses ni Divine. He wanted to assure her that she did nothing wrong but he couldn't speak about it. 

 

Huminga siya nang malalim at tumayo. "I am going to the restroom. Arrange the papers for me."

 

His assistant nodded as a response. Naging tahimik na ito dahil sa takot na baka magalit nanaman siya. Ziancio shook his head then left his office to go to the restroom.

 

He immediately closed the door when he got there. Agad niyang ipinatakbo ang malamig na tubig ng gripo at ginamit ang dalawang palad para hilamusan ang mukha niyang nag-iinit. Is he blushing right now just because of Divine's presence? Goddamnit! Nasisiraan na talaga siya ng ulo. He is a calm person, but his heart is beating too fast right now because of a woman!

 

Muli siyang huminga nang malalim at tiningnan ang sariling repleksyon. Halos mabasag na ang salamin dahil sa talim ng titig niya dito.

 

"What is happening to you, Ziancio? You're such a jerk!" sigaw niya sa sarili habang nakakuyom ang kamao. Mabuti na lang walang tao sa paligid kaya walang mag-iisip na nababaliw na ang CEO na hinahangaan ng lahat.

 

Simula noong lokohin siya ni Marielle, nawalan na siya ng tiwala sa pag-ibig at hindi niya na hiniling pa na magkaroon ng babaeng magugustuhan. He started to hate every woman since then, pero ngayon ay nagnanasa na siya sa ibang babae. 

 

Is he in love with her, or just lusting over her? Kung nandito lang ang diyos ng pag-ibig sa harapan niya, handa siyang lumuhod para hingin ang kasagutan sa tanong na iyon.