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Chapter 30
#FD30 || Bethylia Monteamor
Hindi ko alam kung mapapanindigan ko ba ang sarili kong hiniling, gayong halos dalawang araw palang na nawawala ang presensiya niya sa tabi ko ay labis na pangungulila na ang nararamdaman ko.
After I said my request, he silently nodded his head and left my sight. Siguro ay hindi na rin kayang maiharap sa akin ang mukha matapos ang mga nalaman.
My heart felt light, the heaviness its been carrying for almost five years has lighten. Nailabas ang mga hinanakit na ilang taong nakatago lang sa loob ng dibdib.
Masarap pala sa pakiramdam kapag naipapagtanggol mo ang sarili mo, masarap pala sa pakiramdam kapag nailalabas mo ang mga hinanakit mo.
If I only did that back then, maybe we're not in this situation, kung saan parehas nang sumusuko ang puso namin.
He may not say it, but the looking his eyes says everything he's feeling. The guilt,
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#FD31 || Bethylia MonteamorFor the past days, Aaren's been tailing me nonstop. Ilang beses ko na siyang sinubukang pabalikin sa probinsiya dahil alam kong kailangan siya doon at maraming responsibilidad na naiwan pero hindi niya ako pinapakinggan.Knowing what personality Aaren has, he'll really not bother listening. Pilit niya akong isinasama doon dahil ako raw ang sekretarya niya.I don't want to go back there, at least for now. I am still healing, I am still mending my ways, everything about me. Ang rami ko pang kailangang matutunan at hilumin. Hindi lang mula sa sakit na nakuha mula sa kanila, kung hindi sa sakit na ibinigay ko rin sa sarili ko.Being weak is hard, specially if you're just stopping yourself from everything because the fear inside you is dominating you wholly."What's with you and Pedro? You got back together?" Blanche scoffed."We
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#FD32 || Bethylia MonteamorI sluggishly threw my head back as I stared at the serene dark sky above me. Stars are scattered everywhere, while the crescent moon is gleaming in the middle of the dark sky, it's making my lips curled into a blissful smile.I repeatedly blink my eyes when a sudden presence of a familiar guy blocked my view. His face is too close on mine that it made me always fell on my chair."What the fuck are you doing, Mark?" I hissed as I fixed my position."Why are you here? It's cold."Instead of answering him, I rolled my eyes amd frowned. "Palagi ka nalang sumusulpot kapag mag-isa ako. Kabute ka ba?""Just be thankful that you have a friend with you in times like this."I am at the top of the building I am living in. Since it's near midnight, wala ng tao at tahimik na ang buong paligid. Hindi ko alam kung papaanong n
Flawed Desires Chapter 32 (part 2)
Days had passed like that. Ni hindi ko na napansin ang paglipas ng mga araw. And as expected, Aaren didn't suddenly showed up here even once. Lumipas ang dalawang buwang hinihingi ko pero hindi pa rin ako muling nagpaparamdam o kahit tuparin ang ipinangako bago siya umalis ay hindi ko ginawa. I am not ditching him, I am just still at the procees of healing and improving and I know he's also still in those process. Ayokong sa tuwing may hindi magandang mangyayari sa pagitan namin kung sakaling bumalik sa piling ng isa't-isa ay mas pipiliin niyang lumayo at isarado ang tainga. I don't want him getting aggressive and being able to hurt me in a flashed of second. He needs to change his way of absorbing things first. Not through hurting, not through avoiding but through having a good and calm talk. I stared at my hands resting on my table. I stared at it lovingly with a small smile on my face. I r
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#FD33 || Bethylia Monteamor"Long time no see, my wife."I stared at him with longing in my eyes. I've been wanting to see him since he left Manila, but due to our circumstances, I stopped myself from doing anything to satisfy my heart.Heal first before loving fully again.I swallowed a hard lump on my throat and look at him with my inquisitive eyes. "Why are you here?"Marahan niyang inabot ang kamay kong namamahinga sa kandungan at pinisil iyon na parang sinasabi ang sagot sa tanong kong hindi ko naman makuha."I wanted to see my wife. Hinayaan na kita ng isang taon, hindi na ako papayag na madagdagan pa iyon, Bethylia. I've heal, I know you did too. Let's not be away from each other from now on."I can't help but gasped as he pulled me towards him and wrapped me around his arms. Marahan akong napabuga ng hangin at hinayaan siya sa gin
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Nanlaki ang mata ko sa narinig. Marahas kong ibinaling sa kanya ang tingin habang mariing nakatikom ang mga labi. He nervously scratched the back of his head while avoiding my eyes. Funny how the things change after all the events happened in our lives. I was always the scared one back then, the one who's always apologising, the one who's always listening, obliging, and understanding but I can see the opposite things right now. "I am sorry. That's not what I mean.. I mean.. I'll just shut my fucking mouth." I can't help but burst out in laughter as I look at his pale face. Inilapat ko pa ang kamay sa tiyan habang inaabot ang kamay niyang ngayon ay nasa likod ng ulo habang halatang pinagsisisihan ang ginawang kahit saan tingnan ay hindi naman mali. He's so funny. He just made my day more. "Why are you suddenly like that? I can't believe this." I la
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#FD35 || Bethylia MonteamorI was pacing back and forth while Aaren is just infront of me, chuckling everytime he'll lift his gaze to meet my eyes.I am nervous. Walang alam ang pamilya ko na ikinasal ako, at sa loob ng isang taon kong pagkakatali kay Aaren ay hindi ko iyon ipinaalam o kahit nabanggit man lang ng kahit isang beses, kahit sa mga kaibigan. The only one who had knowledge about it is Mark, of course, he's our witness.I just don't want to answer things, specifically those times that I am still grasping everything that happened, those time that I am still healing."Calm down, Bethylia. Wala namang mangyayaring masama. We'll just say it, no sweat."Awtomat
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