"Are you fucking nuts, Bethyl? Paanong hindi gagawing big deal ang ganoong bagay?"
My shoulders fell after hearing his words.
"Sa palagay mo, Mark. Sino ang magmumukhang masama kung ilalabas ko ang pangyayaring iyon? Sinong magiging katatawanan? Sinong mas nakakahiya?"
I've thought of that after he said those things. Alam kong mas makapangyarihan sila kaysa sa akin kaya kung sakaling lalaban ay ako lang ang mapapahiya.
Knowing how peoples mind works here, siguradong lahat ay mababaligtad at sa akin mapupunta ang lahat ng sisi.
"You're really so stupid, Monteamor. Akala ko matapang kang babae."
Now, I am being called stupid because of being powerless.
This is how life works, kung mahirap ka, tiyak na ang kalalabasan ng isang bagay kahit hindi ka pa nagsisimulang lumaban.
And in order to fight people like them, I need t
#FD26 || Bethylia MonteamorMy whole body is aching, but even with all the pain I am feeling, emotionally, physically and mentally, I still choose to stand from the ground and chase him before he can even left my eyes.Panay ang ngiwi ko habang mabilis ang mga hakbang na hinahabol ang papalayong bulto na ngayon ni Aaren.I bit my lower lip and winced in pain as I run towards him and wrapped my arms around his waist from his back."Don't leave..." I pleaded while sobbing on his back. "I'm in pain, you don't want to see me like this right? Don't leave."Mas hinigpitan ko ang pagkakayakap sa kanya nang maramdaman ko ang kanyang pagprotesta.My knees are wobbling in weakness, heart is shattering uncontrollably while eyes are sobbing like there's no tomorrow ahead of us."Aaren, don't leave."Marahan akong napabuga ng hang
I stared at the mauve sky and sighed.I don't want him to leave, ayos lang kung walang dumating na iba sa buhay ko basta babalik siya.Lahat ng sinabi ko kanina sa kanya ay parang biglang naglaho dahil walang pagdadalawang-isip ko iyong kinain at nilunok."Let's go inside, para kang pulubing nanghihingi ng makakain diyan.""Hindi pagkain ang hinihingi ko, paniniwala niya sa akin ang nililimos ko." I unconsciously uttered.A deep and hearty laugh escape from his mouth as he held my chin to met my gaze."Limusin mo iyon kapag maayos ka na." He seriously muttered. "Solid ka rin manakit, Bethyl. Harapan talaga.""What about Arya then?" I asked after contemplating what he just said.He shrugged and sat in the ground to prop his hand at his back to support his weight. Inayos ko rin ang pagkakaupo at piniling hayaan ang natu
#FD27 || Bethylia MonteamorI gracefully walk towards my grinning friends and rolled my eyes. Ang iilang tao sa paligid ay halos mawalan na ng pakialam dahil lahat ay nasa iisang tao lang ang atensiyon."Kamusta na ang tanga?" Blanche teased as I sat infront of them."Kamusta ang magulo ang buhay?"Ibinaling ko ang ulo kay Samm na nagsasalita ngayon sa unahan. It's her birthday and just like me, her heart is also broken.Ganoon talaga siguro kapag magkakaibigan, sabay-sabay nagiging tanga."Sinabi ko na kasi sa iyo, nandiyan naman si Mark. Handang maghintay kahit maubos." She chuckled.
#FD28 || Bethylia Monteamor(continuation after chapter 3)"Nakakapagod kang mahalin, Aaren." I whispered bitterly. "Akala ko magiging maayos pa ang lahat. Umasa ako. Kahit wala na akong aasahan ay umasa ako."He tried to step forward but he can't because everytime he'll do that, I took a step backward. Siguro nararamdaman niya na ang nararamdaman ko noong hanggang ngayon. Kada pipilitin kong umabante, pilit din siyang aatras palayo sa akin."I'm sorry, I can't do this job anymore. I quit." I said before turning my back on him."Don't do this, Bethylia."My steps halted after hearing his words. I sarcastically chuckled as I threw my head back and stared at the slightly orange sky—symbolizing the dusk coming sooner.Ang paborito kong oras mula noon hanggang ngayon, ang siyang palaging oras kung kailan ko naranas
#FD29 || Bethylia MonteamorWhen what you hear and what you see doesn't match, trust you eyes - DaleRenton-"Bakit umuwi ka ngayon dito, Bethyl? Wala ka pang isang buwan doon, ah!" Blanche chuckled while looking at me with her playful eyes.I groaned and rolled my eyes. "Alam kong tanga ako, huwag niyo ng paulit-ulitin.""Nakapag-usap ba kayo?" Samm carefully asked while worriedly eyeing me.Marahan kong kinagat ang loob ng pisngi at mabagal na umiling. "We didn't. We fight all day, that's what happened."Naiiling na napabuga ng ha
#FD30 || Bethylia MonteamorHindi ko alam kung mapapanindigan ko ba ang sarili kong hiniling, gayong halos dalawang araw palang na nawawala ang presensiya niya sa tabi ko ay labis na pangungulila na ang nararamdaman ko.After I said my request, he silently nodded his head and left my sight. Siguro ay hindi na rin kayang maiharap sa akin ang mukha matapos ang mga nalaman.My heart felt light, the heaviness its been carrying for almost five years has lighten. Nailabas ang mga hinanakit na ilang taong nakatago lang sa loob ng dibdib.Masarap pala sa pakiramdam kapag naipapagtanggol mo ang sarili mo, masarap pala sa pakiramdam kapag nailalabas mo ang mga hinanakit mo.If I only did that back then, maybe we're not in this situation, kung saan parehas nang sumusuko ang puso namin.He may not say it, but the looking his eyes says everything he's feeling. The guilt,
#FD31 || Bethylia MonteamorFor the past days, Aaren's been tailing me nonstop. Ilang beses ko na siyang sinubukang pabalikin sa probinsiya dahil alam kong kailangan siya doon at maraming responsibilidad na naiwan pero hindi niya ako pinapakinggan.Knowing what personality Aaren has, he'll really not bother listening. Pilit niya akong isinasama doon dahil ako raw ang sekretarya niya.I don't want to go back there, at least for now. I am still healing, I am still mending my ways, everything about me. Ang rami ko pang kailangang matutunan at hilumin. Hindi lang mula sa sakit na nakuha mula sa kanila, kung hindi sa sakit na ibinigay ko rin sa sarili ko.Being weak is hard, specially if you're just stopping yourself from everything because the fear inside you is dominating you wholly."What's with you and Pedro? You got back together?" Blanche scoffed."We
#FD32 || Bethylia MonteamorI sluggishly threw my head back as I stared at the serene dark sky above me. Stars are scattered everywhere, while the crescent moon is gleaming in the middle of the dark sky, it's making my lips curled into a blissful smile.I repeatedly blink my eyes when a sudden presence of a familiar guy blocked my view. His face is too close on mine that it made me always fell on my chair."What the fuck are you doing, Mark?" I hissed as I fixed my position."Why are you here? It's cold."Instead of answering him, I rolled my eyes amd frowned. "Palagi ka nalang sumusulpot kapag mag-isa ako. Kabute ka ba?""Just be thankful that you have a friend with you in times like this."I am at the top of the building I am living in. Since it's near midnight, wala ng tao at tahimik na ang buong paligid. Hindi ko alam kung papaanong n