Four

Chapter - 4

"We reached," Yvonne announced, turning the car off and unbuckling her belt.

"So fast?" I was trying to unbuckle my seatbelt but that stupid seatbelt wasn't just getting unbuckled.

"Yeah, I drove fast too. The party house is nearby; I told you that before."

It took us only two minutes to reach the party house. But as she said, she actually drove way too fast. I did tell her to slow down a bit but does she ever listen? She's so much like Alaska Young from Looking for Alaska, sometimes. She, too, sometimes could be so damn impulsive.

The party house was easily visible by just walking some feet from the parking lot. With the big iron gate just some metres away from the party house, it was big enough for a handful bunch of many people but not too huge. It was like a bungalow but you couldn't call it a mansion. I could already hear the noises from all the music and shoutings from a distance. I was right about this: this is going to be one hell of a night because the party seemed to be a huge one.

I was never a party person and I could literally count the number of parties I have gone to in my life. This was like the fourth or the fifth one for sure and I wouldn't have come to this party if it wasn't for her.

I could see plenty of guys coming out to smoke and some girls leaving the party with guys who were all over them. They all seemed pretty drunk which only added up to my suspicions.

They say not to judge people fast but looking at the individuals who just went out with other guys and girls, I could say that I was not wrong about my thinking; I guess one night stands were pretty normal here. I won't know because all these weren't and never really my thing.

"My warning earlier is because of all these things that you are staring at right now." Yvonne suddenly comfessed, startling me and taking me out of my thoughts. I smiled, nodding.

It seemed she noticed how uncomfortable I got after seeing all those people. She knew it well that I wasn't used to all these. Perhaps, she knew it since the first time she saw me and that's why she gave me all those warnings. A good person reader, or maybe I'm just too easy to read.

Walking inside the building, we witnessed a bunch of people dancing, drinking and laughing wildly as if the party had already started and was almost in its mid. But I had to admit: the house was cleaned up pretty well; the host knew exactly how to plan a party. I sighed, impressed but my confusion hadn't been expelled from me yet. So, I looked over at Yvonne and to my surprise, she was taking a look around with a confused glance.

"Hey, the party starts at six right?" I asked, raising my voice because the music was too loud.

"Y-Yeah. I mean Jason told me it starts at six. Actually, don't ask me, I am confused too,"

I continued to stare at her with folded arm, to which she shot me back a look which spoke, 'Don't give me that look. We are in the same boat'. Sulking, I just stood there, not knowing what to do next.

"Why can't we just join in? It's okay, no big deal. Maybe he made a mistake?"

"Jason never messes with the party timings, espec—"

"Hey Yvonne! Welcome! Why are you late, dude?" Someone with a deep voice interrupted her from behind. I turned around to see a tall guy with hair as dark as the night sky and a slightly tan complexion. His attire spoke to me that he was a very sporty person and he had chiselled face.

"Jason, you told me that the party starts at six," Yvonne complained.

Okay, so he is the infamous Jason Baltimore.

"Oh shit. Didn't I text you that it's been shifted to five because the Dean said it's a college night so the party has to start early and end early?"

"No!" She answered, annoyed.

"Oh shit, sorry man! I promise it won't happen again." His eyes gleamed with sincerity and guilt, and for a flash second, I felt as if they had something going on or they shared something in the past.

"It's okay, but anyways, I won't get heavy tonight because I'm here for her," Yvonne said, putting her left arm over me. "She is Summer Avery Hayes and she is a freshman, and not to forget – my new roommate." She looked at me and smiled.

"Oh hey there newbie!" His eyes shifted to me. "I'm Jason Baltimore and the host of the party. Welcome to Dalewood, where you get to meet the most amazing kind of people, starting from our squad." He said in an amused tone. This guy was surely proud of his "squad". He then lend his hand out for a handshake.

"Hi, I'm Summer!" I said, lending out my hand for the handshake. "And the party is amazing! You sure do know how to make a party thriving. Thank you for the warm welcome."

"Oh, thank you so much. That's so sweet of you." He offered me a warm smile, before turning to her. "Yvonne, the whole squad is upstairs and it's been so long so you gotta join us. Bring her with you. That way, she can meet more people."

"Not any other people but your squad. If there are any pole dancers upstairs from your dad's bar then I ain't coming. She won't feel comfortable."

"Yeah, my squad are also people and don't worry, there are none. We've all been taking a break from that." He assured her.

"Yeah right, as if I don't know that you can't live without sex and girls but okay, I believe you tonight. But, if you lied about it, you are dead, Jason."

"Fine, mate. Now let's go. We have a lot to catch up with." He said the "we have a lot to catch up with" more quietly as if he didn't want her to hear but as I was nearer to him, I heard it which added up more to my little suspicion. But, I couldn't guarantee the fact that she didn't.

Soon, both were leading the way so I quietly asked her where we were going to which she answered that she would make me meet his guy friends, with whom she spent last year with, so I just nodded and followed but I still felt uncomfortable by the word "guys".

We took the stairs and reached the third floor in no time. The third floor was less crowded and a lot more quieter which brought peace to my disturbed soul. The third floor was also smaller compared to the other floors so no wonder it was less crowded. While climbing up, all I could here was moans and laughs and shoutings coming from each direction. The party house had plenty of rooms so the moans were expected. God, do these people get her every time they see someone from the opposite sex or even from the same sex? Not judging them since their lives, their choices but still having sex in a party and that also, when everyone could legit hear you? Nah, thank you.

When we reached the third floor, I noticed that there were even lesser rooms and the only sound coming was from a room to the left. The only sound was laughings of guys, and I could make out the gender because the sound was not far from the stairs.

Taking a left, Jason led us to a huge room, some metres away from the stairs. When we entered, he loudly shouted, which startled me that my would nearly left.

"Hey, Squad, I'm back and with Yvonne and her friend!" Jason cheerfully held out his arms wide and long. Hearing his voice, they all looked up. When they looked up, I noticed one guy.

That guy had dirty blonde hair with features so sharp that I hadn't seen anyone with features as sharp as his. I wonder what's with everyone here and their sharp features. His complexion was pale and the small freckles on his nose and cheeks made him all the way more adorable. His eyes were blue like the ocean that for a flash second, I thought as if I just saw the waves and the soothing sound of the ocean in his eyes. It was intense, yet beautiful. His face was perfectly chiselled. There was also a very mysterious aura surrounding this guy which made him all the more attractive. In all honesty, he was the most good looking guy I've ever laid eyes on. Talk about cliché with handsome guys.  

"Summer. Hello?" Yvonne shook me hard. "Dude, are you even listening to me?"

"Oh yeah, I'm sorry. I wandered off,"

"Yeah, you did. Anyways, I would like to introduce you to some people," She said smiling. "Summer, they are all a part of "the squad". They don't have a name because they think it's too overrated. Anyways, They are all sophomores," She pointed her finger to the guy the utmost left and began introducing, "This is Ryder Hudson, Ian Hastings, Liam Brown, Preston Miller an—"

"Elijah. Grey." The guy who just did magic said.

"Okay, so Elijah Grey" I mentally noted. When he stood up, I noticed that he was tall, thin and pretty muscular which only added up to his already visible hotness al— What?! Hotness!? I couldn't believe the my words.

Even my confusion about why I was even thinking he was hot couldn't stop me from noticing him more - he wore an off-white hoodie with a denim jacket on top of it which did no help to hide his perfect body. He paired them with black torn jeans and black vans. His dirty blonde hair was untamed and messy, making it in taper wavy style and his deep piercing blue eyes met mine and I felt like he would hypnotise me the next second if I didn't look away.

Except that I didn't.

I couldn't.

It was like my whole body and every part in me had signed an agreement that allowed him to hypnotised me just by his eyes. If eyes could capture, I would have been captured, happily. And that was the problem.

Instantly and immediately, I hated the way he made me feel because I felt so powerless and so dependent and the elephant in here, wasn't how he made me feel – it was how I had never felt like this for anyone before so I didn't know shit about this stupid thing that I was feeling at the moment. It was like...suddenly, I felt as if I-I realised that I don't re-really have everything that I ne-need.

I had always felt as if I had everything because I was blessed in many ways of life - at least I considered myself to be. I got everything that I've ever asked for and I didn't ask for more and why should I? Happiness was the most important thing and I had it. I was happy with whatever I had and was so damn sure that I had EVERYTHING.

Until tonight.

Tonight, I felt as if I realised happiness was the most important thing but happiness itself was incomplete without love. I tried brushing all those thoughts away by telling myself that I was being ridiculous but in vain. Yvonne was already chatting with the boys and she signalled me to come join but I told her that I was okay and I didn't want to. She insisted me to come talk to them but I was sterned about my decision. It wasn't that I was uncomfortable so I avoided talking to the guys - it was that, I was still not done figuring out.

I had always believed in the miracles of love and stuff related to the confusing but captivating thing called 'love' but never really felt I needed it. I always pictured myself alone in the future, happily. Never, not even once, did I feel that I need to marry one day and start a family. It wasn't related to feminism or anything of that sort but it was just my personal decision. Of course, feminism and all these gender inequalities are important but my decision to not want any partner was a personal choice. I was neither a feminist, pseudo-feminist, misandrist nor a meninist or misogynistic. And just because I wasn't a feminist or a meninist, it wasn't like I was against it. I believed in the right, based on the situation.

I tried to again brush all the stupid realisation I felt I was realising at the moment because sure I couldn't be attracted to a person I just met, let alone love. I ain't like that. I tried thinking I was just tired and thinking stupid thoughts about a guy whom I hadn't even spoken a word with. I tried telling myself again and again that I was going crazy  but in vain.

The feelings and the stupid realisation refused to get out of my head. Instead, I ended up realising and questioning myself more. I tried to stop it a lot of times and even tried to go join the others but I realized I wouldn't be able to talk and join them properly if I wasn't done with this shit.

"Summer, will you come to join us? Aren't you bored there, alone? I thought you would come after a while but it's been twenty minutes! And you still there! Come!!" Yvonne called out.

"It's okay, you be with them. I'll just go downstairs and have a drink," I tried to convince her.

"Are you okay?! Wait, I'm coming with you." She stood up, hurriedly and turning to the guys, "Squad, I gotta go. See you tom!" They all nodded and waved a bye to both of us. But, I was feeling guilty for ruining her time with them.

"Girl, I'm fine. I'm just a little thirsty. I'll go by myself. I'm okay.. and besides, I'm just going downstairs."

"No. I ain't leaving you alone. Looking after you is my responsibility." She insisted so I let her come. Just then, we felt someone running after us. Turning around, I saw Jason, breathless.

"Do you want me to come with you two? Besides, the whole college in here so many drunk guys must be there. It isn't safe."

I couldn't help but feel awe. Now, I'm so so so sure that these two had something going on. I noted to myself that ill ask her later about it.

"No Jason! It's okay. You go and spend time with them. If possible, I'll come back with her."

He nodded. "Okay, then," and went back to the room. But, I couldn't assist my growing curiosity. I was sure to ask her when we go back but not at the moment.

Yvonne looked at me, taking my arm and putting hers in mine, and said, "Girl, I was the one who brought to this party so I will not leave you alone."

I smiled. "Thank you, dumbass. Now, let's go. I need a drink." She smiled back and we started walking downstairs, talking about random things but to say that I was listening to her talks would be lying since I wasn't done figuring it out. When I thought I would actually give up "figuring" it out, I heard a voice speaking to me - inside my head; it was my inner self speaking out to me.

"It took you so long to realise this simple thing and kept on thinking you have everything when you clearly didn't and still don't. The happiness you think you have is itself incomplete because you don't have love in it. You need love, sweetheart – the only thing missing in your happiness box. And the guy in front of you made you realise this small thing just by his eyes and gaze on you, something no one could do in your past seventeen years. Sure he must be special."

"Yes, sure," I whispered to myself and chuckled humourlessly, with irritation and annoyance in my tone, hating myself with every bit of hatred present in all the bad qualities that I had in me for letting myself be vulnerable and weak, even though it was internal and no one saw it.