Chapter 1

Alpha Tristan Leroux.

I watched as the sun rose in the sky through the clear glass window of my office, leaning back in the leather chair, surrounded by elegant luxury. If Blackrock was my kingdom, then this was my throne. A legacy passed down from father to son. Wars were fought to sit in this seat, to rule a pack, and yet it had been handed to me on a silver platter. 

‘Today could be the day’. The unusually excited voice of Nox bounced around my head, breaking the peaceful silence and dragging me away from my morbid thoughts.

I held back my humour at his tone, on any given day the Alpha wolf inside of me was sullen and serious, as was expected of our position, but today was mating day and all bets were off, the wolf inside of me had thought of nothing but today for weeks, it had made my life rather difficult.

It’s really hard to hand out orders and assignments or conduct training and take the situation seriously when every fibre of my being is electrified with excitement and giddy with anticipation. 

I shook my head with fondness and continued staring out at the lightening sky as my own mind wondered over thoughts of the day to come. It was going to be a long one, there was no doubt about that.

There were several ways a mating could occur amongst shifters, the oldest tradition was through nature itself. The instantaneous recognition by the wolf inside us, that the person before you was yours, your literal other half. I’m told it’s a force like no other, a shifting of the ground beneath your feet as the world spins on its axis and all that matters in that moment is uniting your own half with theirs.

Of course, with the packs becoming increasingly insular and our general numbers dwindling, it was becoming rarer by the day for such a natural phenomenon to occur.

In the interest of self-preservation, our race had begun arranging mating’s decades ago. Of course, the bond could be forced through the marking of ones mate, but this was never what nature had planned for us and in general the partnership, the bond and the link would never be as strong as a true match, but of course we were all only willing to wait so long, and eventually we gave up hope and stopped waiting for a true match and agreed to an arrangement.

Mating day was a celebratory day, something all wolves came to look forward to because no matter how much we tried to ignore it, the wolf inside of us would not give up until bonded to a mate, I guess that no one ever genuinely wants to be alone.

As Blackrock’s Alpha and the hosting pack of the alliance mating day, it is my responsibility to oversee the matches, ensuring that all arrangements were to the liking and benefit of all parties involved. It was always a long day, and certainly not my favourite part of the job.

I scrubbed a hand over my face as I stared mindlessly at the now light sky. Today was the Autumn Mating, in a little over an hour hundreds of wolves would descend on us, as all unmated females aged eighteen or over, from all four of the alliance packs would be brought to the grounds of our pack house and lined up. Then each un-mated male looking for their mate would walk the line to see if they would be one of the lucky few who found a true match.

Once the search for true mates was completed all wolves would be free to arrange a mating at their discretion, so long as they gained approval from their pack Alpha’s of course. All day I would be greeted by members of my own pack, seeking my approval to mate with someone that had caught their attention, usually someone from a different pack.

But thoughts of the long and tedious day ahead of us, wasn’t what had Nox so antsy that I could barely sit still myself, no it was pure, unfettered excitement that had him vibrating with energy.

Each time one of these rolled around it was getting harder and harder to deny him what he wanted. My wolf wanted a mate and although I was the youngest Alpha in our pack history, it was still considered unusual for an Alpha to be unmated.

Traditionally a mated pair of Alphas would command a pack and the fact that I was only 25 didn’t seem to matter much to my pack members. Each mating day they watched with bated breath to see if I would walk the line, to see if I showed any interest at all in taking a mate. I never had, not that I was particularly against the idea, I just honestly didn’t think I would ever find the time, I certainly didn’t have time to cuddle and comfort some scared teenager who had been sheltered from the real world and was barely out of school, and how could I ever expect some scared innocent she-wolf to take me on, surely it would be a burden to even the strongest of contenders.

But I couldn’t deny Nox any longer. My wolf was the best part of me, my strength, determination, and force of will certainly would not be as strong without my Alpha wolf merging with me. And how could I continue to deny the best part of me the only thing he wanted. I swallowed hard as I made the decision. This year I would walk the line.

As soon as the decision was made Nox roared inside of me, forcing my stance to change and I shook my head, damn wolf was like a kid a Christmas rather than the alter ego of the pack Alpha. ‘Settle down, I said I would walk the line, I didn’t make any promises.’

‘I know, I know.’ His voice was deep and unmistakably pleased ‘It won’t matter if we meet her, nothing will stop us from claiming what is ours, you would never be able to deny the pull.’ He informed, not for the first time. And not for the first time my mind wondered into dangerous territory.

‘What if our mate isn’t fit to be a Luna? What if she can’t handle me?’ The thought was a worrying one, given my parents history.

‘Our mate will be perfect for us. This whole choosing your own partner nonsense leaves way too much up to chance. But there is none of that with a true match, she will be perfect.’

‘And what if we do not have a true match, would you be accepting of an arranged partnership?’ I questioned, having never even considered this before, I had spent the last three years focused solely on leading my pack through the dangerous waters of a pack war. With everything at stake, mating had never been a true consideration, beyond the possibility of it occurring naturally at any time.

Nox never had a chance to answer as a knock sounded on the office door. I reached out with my mind feeling the presence of my Beta Roman and linking our minds “Why are you knocking?” I asked curiously, Roman wasn’t known for following the hierarchy etiquette including knocking, on more than one occasion the man had barged into the middle of a compromising situation, usually one I was personally involved in.

‘I’m not alone.’ His annoyed voice returned across the link, and I wondered for a moment if he was annoyed at having to follow the rules for a change, or something else entirely.

“Come in.” I called out vocally. And waited while the door sung open, admitting the tall muscular man that had been my best friend for twenty years, my brother for at least fifteen of those and my Beta for the four years I had been Alpha of Blackrock. His overly long hair flapped about as he stepped fully into the room and rolled his eyes at me in clear annoyance before speaking.

“Alpha Leroux.” He greeted with a formal nod and twist of his head. A sign of respect given to superiors, offering up a weakness and exposing your neck. It was a rather pointless and barbaric tradition as far as I was concerned but it was still tradition and trying to break with tradition amongst shifters was about as good an idea as banging your head against a brick wall.

It didn’t take long for me to figure out why Roman was breaking out the big guns when he stepped aside, and the grey-haired and tanned, familiar face took a step into the office.

“Ah Alpha Catoil, you’re early.” I stated trying to keep the surprise and accusation out of my voice. The fifty something man was a piece of work, stubborn, ostentatious, and cantankerous to name a few, but worst of all he was just a plain pain in the ass.

“Alpha Leroux.” He greeted his tone always condescending and I ground my teeth while trying to calm Nox down. “We had a little difficulty and left early to compensate. Of course, we handled the situation perfectly, so the extra time wasn’t needed, but we decided to continue with the journey in a timely manner. I’m sure we can find something to occupy ourselves with if your grounds are not yet prepared to host our pack.”

‘Let me at him. Just once, I will tear his limbs off the bastard, how dare he think he can talk down to us.’

I shook the thought out of my head and ignored Roman’s glare directed at the back of the man’s head. Yes, today was going to be a really long day.

Calista Fai.

“Mum please.” I groaned pulling my now sore and abused head away from the torture device in her hands.

“Come on Cali,” She shook her head before folding her hands in her lap. “Sweetheart, it’s your first mating day. I understand you’re not excited, but the leased you can do is put a brush through your hair.” She held up the aforementioned tortured device and I glared at it for a full minute, willing the thing to turn to ash, to no avail of course. Unfortunately, the freakiness had a limit, it’s a shame really, I still think shooting flames from my eyes would at least somewhat make up for the shitty childhood I had endured at the hands of my peers.

“Do I have to go? Can’t I just hide out here?”

“No sweetheart, you know the rules.” She uttered before starting to pull the brush through my thick curls once again and I groaned, Alpha Marcus De’Maine was the leader of the Oak creek pack, and he insisted that it was mandatory for all of age she-wolves to attend mating day. Whether we wanted to or not.

“I don’t see the point. It’s not like I can take a mate.” I uttered, the desolation setting in once more. As much as I tried to deny it to myself, the urge to mate was there, my wolf Thalia understood my reluctance and helped keep the feelings under wraps, but considering we were essentially two beings living in one body, well she couldn’t exactly hide it well.

Why couldn’t I be normal? Why couldn’t I be one of the excited, preppy, teenage she-wolves who had nothing to worry about but what to wear and who I would be mated to. I shook the thought off, wallowing in self-pity would do no one any favours, truth was that even if I was normal, I probably wouldn’t be one of those girls.

“Of course you can.” My Mum stated in that no nonsense tone that all mothers seemed to perfect at the moment of birth, and I sighed heavily, we had been having this argument for at least a year now. My parents insisted that any mate I took would love me enough that it wouldn’t matter. I couldn’t truly see that being the case, but even if it was, I couldn’t inflict my world onto someone else.

“And what Mum, lie to my mate, that’s a great way to start a relationship. Not like I could tell him the truth. I mean no one but you, dad and the Alpha really knows in Oak creek and yet I’m still shunned around here.”

“Oh, it isn’t all that bad.” She soothed and I twisted my head to stare at her in disbelief.

“Not that bad? Mum you were there at the school. Do you have any idea what it is like to be an eighteen-year-old without a single close friend?”

“What about Tammara?” She questioned with a frown, and I shook my head.

“We are friendly, she’s nice but she can’t be associated with me, especially not at school, she wants a position in the guard so she’s trying to stay on Amelia’s good side so that nothing gets back to her dad.” I uttered trying not to think too much about the queen bitch as I spoke. I had enough to worry about, beside school was over now. Hopefully it would be a very long time until I had to see her again.

“Maybe taking a mate would be a good thing, have you considered that? You know the possibilities we have considered, what it could mean for you.” She smiled and I huffed again. I couldn’t see it. It was just too ludicrous that my freakiness would be tempered down by taking a mate, all I could see was the bad.

“How can it possibly be a good thing? I can’t condemn anyone else to the kind of life I have to live, to be talked about, not trusted. I get that I am different, I have come to terms with that, but I will not put that on some poor unsuspecting wolf that is simply looking for a mate.” I stated, the fire burning inside me with my determination, and I knew without a shadow of a doubt that if I looked in a mirror at that moment my eyes would be glowing, flickering like orange flames.

I blinked them closed out of habit, hiding them. A wolfs eyes were blue. Always blue, like the ocean. But the colour of my eyes was just the start of the long list of ways in which I was different.

I heard my Mum’s sigh as she leant into me, kissing the top of my head, “I understand, I wish you would embrace this, but I do understand. You can refuse to take an arrangement Cali but what will you do if you have a true match?”

“I’m just hoping that won’t happen, it’s so rare now.” I stated but the honest truth was the thought terrified me.

I loved my wolf. Thalia is my everything, the better part of me, my closest companion and the only one I will every truly be able to trust, I wish I was strong enough to give her a better life, one filled with the excitement and adventures she craved, with the mate she was eager for but our life had not been easy, I discovered at quite a young age that children are cruel, especially to those that are different, and I was certainly that.

“Come on, we need to leave soon.” Mum stated her tone full of sadness, leaving the hairbrush on my dresser before walking through the open doorway.

‘I wish I could make her happy, she wants me to be happy, but I don’t know how to do that Thalia, how can I possibly force another to go through what we do?’

‘You don’t know that it would be that way.’ Her gentle voice sounded in my head, in direct contradiction to the fire that flowed through my veins.

‘Are you willing to take the chance?’ I asked but this time she offered no advice. Thalia had suffered right alongside me through the years, she understood, she was the only one that did. The only one that ever would.

 I dropped my legs off the edge of the bed and stood with resignation. ‘Time to go. let’s hope we don’t meet a mate. Because if we do, I have no idea what to do about it.’ I uttered and felt Thalia’s grudging agreement, it went against every fibre of her nature, but she too knew the importance of us staying a lone wolf.