I was allowed to sit in the chair within my room today, and it felt nice to be sitting somewhere other than my bed. My whole body ached, that I couldn’t deny, and the doctors were unable to tell me how long that would last, but they did seem sure I was healing. From where I sat I was able to see out of the window to my room, and I could see out into the fields, I assumed. Beautiful scenery for miles and miles. The packlands, perhaps?But as I sat there gazing out of the window, my mind wandered thinking about what may be out there, the smell lingering kept hitting my senses. Tingling there for no real reason. The chair appeared to smell so strongly of Beta Rocco, despite his recent absence. I have not seen him for a couple of days now, I believe. Though, in truth, I had lost track of days whilst here. Hours seemed to last forever, while at the same time drifting away in the blink of an eye. I had no concept of time here. And hours faded into days too easily. This was only adding to t
I was leaving my office, pleased with the progress of the work I had completed today. But, more so, pleased with the fact I had managed to stay away from the hospital for yet another day. I was doing well. It was like torture. And I had a feeling it was not helping me with bringing my wolf back to me, but I felt it needed to be done in a bid to bring my mate back to me. And, the updates from the hospital when I mindlinked them, sounded promising.Things today had been slow. Which had made it harder for me to be distracted from my thoughts of Aria. That made it harder. Which was why it was good progress. But in completing the work I had, I had been able to look over the research about this rogue camp Micah had spoken of, and it appeared all he said was true. Other than a few very young males, most residing there were women and children. Attacking them would be wrong.The craving to reek punishment on those who had caused the pain to my pack. To my mate
I looked at Anna in disbelief. No, I had to be hearing her wrong, didn’t I? The pain in my heart was excruciating. I knew Aria was uncertain of her past. That she was uncertain of me, but I had clung to the desperate hope that something would come back to her… anything… a tiny sliver of memory that might allow her to know she was safe here. Never had I imagined she would be considering an escape!“Please tell me you told her you couldn’t do that.” I asked, my voice wobbling as I spoke.Anna looked to me with a sympathetic smile. “I didn’t know what to say, Rocco.” She whispered, and the expression upon her face changed to one of uncertainty. Now filling me with unease. Had she said she would help her?“Anna.” My voice was demanding now. Irritation was already beginning to bubble. This could not be happening. The woman in front of me was meant to be one of my closest friends. The mate of my best friend. She had seen me fall apart due to the pain of losing Aria. She more than anyone kn
I have an ally, I believe. The Luna of the pack seemed so friendly, and she appeared to agree to help me… she had sat with me for quite a while. We chatted, and there was a warmth to her that I cannot describe. It was almost like I felt able to trust her. Trust is a strange thing, and I know currently it is not something I am able to give out easily, so that would be difficult to say. But, she felt almost trustworthy. And, she seemed to listen when I asked her to help. She looked like she cared.I had to cling to that hope, because without her, I fear I may be forever stuck here. Stuck in a place I did not want to be, in a place I did not belong, surrounded by people I did not know. That was not a future that filled me with hope, I have to say. I once again sat within my chair, having taken a shower. Though rather than sitting and staring out of the window like I had previously I had found myself sitting and looking at the beautiful flowers on the table next to my bed. I still did no
I called her Tesoro without even thinking. It slipped out, and the look within her eyes as she looked toward me was one filled with uncertainty. She knew what that word meant, but I would expect her to, her parents had used it too, and she seemed to have no problem recalling that far back…“Aria, do you want a drink?” I added quickly to try to cover up my error. But the way her eyes looked at me told me there was no way to cover it up. She had heard me.She slowly shook her head. Maybe me visiting her had been a bad idea. But, hearing her plans to flee had brought me rushing back here. Like a moth to a flame, I was drawn back to her. I knew I needed to come and see if she was okay. I needed to find a way to make her see that she was safe here within our pack. She may not recognize this place as her home at the moment, but it was the only home she had now. I needed to find a way to bring back some sliver of her memory… anythin
There remained an uncomfortable silence in the room since we had discussed her wanting to leave. I was struggling to know what to say to her. Never had I found it difficult to talk with my mate, so why was this happening now? I feared I was not the only one feeling uncomfortable, because from where I was sitting upon Aria’s bed, I could see the tension within her body. She did not feel at ease the way I hoped she would with me near. This was not the way things were supposed to be with your mate by your side.The plans I had created during my many late night talks with my father to woo and win my mate over seemed nothing but a pathetic dream right now. In her company, I felt like a failure. Like she resented my presence. And that put me on edge, and created an uncertainty within me that made me unsure of how to act. This was never how it had been at the start. When I met Aria those first few times, everything came so naturally...Even in my wolf form, the interact
Beta Rocco had offered to take me outside. Out of the same four walls I had been locked inside for far too long, and I could not wait. Sadly, it seemed I was not deemed strong enough to walk, so I would have to accept his assistance and go in a wheelchair. A wheelchair he had gone to get for me, one he had helped me into as I stumbled while trying to sit myself down. The warmth of his touch took me by surprise. The freedom of his movement seemed so natural as he reached out to touch me, but yet his touch seemed so foreign. So wrong...But, I chose not to focus on the many fears I was holding, and instead look toward the thing I wanted most... the time outside. The closest to freedom I would be getting anytime soon. And, as Beta Rocco now pushed me slowly down the hospital corridor, I could not wait to be out in the sunshine he had promised. I had seen a light in his eyes the moment I became excited about his suggestion. He seemed far too eager to please, and it was quite bizarre for a
Seeing Aria relax into the chair as we walked out into the sunshine made me aware of just how much this was the right thing to have done. The beautiful smile upon her face as she tilted her face up to the sunshine warmed my heart. I wanted so desperately to gently kiss her cheek the way I used to. To stroke my hand upon her cheek, and then move it on up into her hair… the way she used to love... the way that so often would lead to a kiss, as we looked into one another's eyes... but instead I simply observed her. Knowing that at this moment in time, she is no longer mine to touch.I smiled tenderly as I watched her turn her head, here and there… taking in every little thing. Her eyes darting back and forth, not knowing where to look next... like it is all new to her, despite the fact we have spent many an hour out here in the past. Yet the expression upon her face tells me that none of it is familiar to Aria. But I know I should not be surprised. Her eyes light up as she watches birds
I was still coming to terms with what had just occurred. I mean, the Beta had fallen asleep by my side! Not just fallen asleep there, but seemed comfortable there! And, the more I consider this, the more I believe this was not accidental. I think he may have chosen to lie by my side. I felt him place his hand over mine... it felt oddly wrong, yet strangely right... I heard the contented sigh slipping from his lips as he slipped into slumber... it was a choice he had made, I am certain of it. The second most important man within the pack I was currently captive in had chosen to sleep by my side. And, the thing was, I did not seem to mind it.I should have hated it. I know I should, but for the strangest of reasons, I could not bring myself to. I had made a fuss, of course, I had. I felt I should, at least to his face, so he thought that I was worried about what others would think. So he believed I did not think it was right. So he was questioning if he had overstepped a mark, because
My mind was drifting. I was holding Aria as we laid upon her bed. My hands snaked over the perfect curves of her hips, as I gazed into those beautiful eyes of hers. Her eyelashes fluttered seductively, while she reached up to play with my hair just the way I loved, which sent goosebumps tingling across my body, before she gripped my hair tightly. I watched her tease at her lips with the tip of her tongue, making my whole body react, as she continued to grip tightly at my hair, suddenly using it to pull me close to her and find my lips with hers.A kiss I had been waiting a lifetime for. Or that is what it felt like. Did she know that seeing her had felt like torture when I could not kiss her? But Aria's lips found mine with a hunger that took me by surprise as I felt her hands still tangled within my hair, causing me to jerk my head back... I woke with a start, and realized it had all been nothing but a dream. A fucking dream... but it told me where I was wi
We had sat enjoying our coffees with the sun shining in the window for quite some time, and there was a lightness within my heart that I did not want to let go. Aria felt close to me again. Maybe not the way in which she always had, but she was closer than she had been in a long time.And now she was so close I did not want to let her go. I was sure I saw a sparkle in her eyes as she laughed. A sparkle I had missed. We were connecting again, I was certain of it. And it was making me reluctant to leave. Not that she once asked me to.The conversation flowed freely and easily, and Aria appeared to be appreciating my company, and it was the greatest feeling after weeks of heaviness looming over me. She seemed almost different, and it filled me with hope she was progressing within her recovery.“How is the Luna doing?” she asked me with concern.“Growing grumpier by the day.” I joked, causing Aria to look at me with shock, and I grinned. Obviously, she had not expected that response, and
I sat on the seat by the window, gazing out over the gardens awaiting Rocco’s return. This tended to be my favorite place to sit now, but in this instance I was on edge as I wanted Rocco back here with me. I had no clue how he knew my favorite drink. He did not even need to ask...I remember the first time I tried it as a teenage girl… it had been so good… out with my Grandma, on one of our many girly shopping days, when we stopped into a new coffee shop and my Grandma suggested I try it… oddly, it had been one of her favorites, alongside tea. And the moment I had tried that first sip, I knew that wold be my favorite drink... I never had plain coffee again when out.I sighed heavily at the memory. I did miss her. My Grandma. I wonder how long she had been gone. They said she was gone, didn’t they? I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore. Everything felt so blurred. But, I felt a heavy sense of loss. Loss I did not want to feel, when the door to my room opened once more, and the l
I had to dismiss Aria talking about the way she felt. It hurt too much. The pain upon hearing her explain the fear she felt made me relive every moment of those early days. The hell when she had woken up and had no clue where she was or who we were. I had hoped for her to need me... want me to be there for her, but there had been nothing but fear. And now to hear how it had felt to her, only made it harder. I did not need to hear it in more detail. So, instead, I told Aria I knew. And she had agreed. Now we found one another in the empty room. Our eyes locked once again. Her eyes are ones I would never tire of looking into…And, as I looked into those beautiful eyes, I felt a heavy sigh slip from my lips, unable to help but note how Aria’s brows raised a little, likely wondering what was wrong. I did not want her worrying about me, or thinking anything was wrong. “So, have you eaten?” I asked, and she nodded earnestly.“The nurse brought my breakfast in.” she explained, and I nodded i
The way Rocco winked at me made my belly flutter a little unexpectedly. So I found myself smiling across at him. Momentarily, I had forgotten what it was I had wanted to tell him. But as I looked across him, simply looking at him, studying the chiseled jawline of his face, I felt his eyes upon mine, and as I moved my eyes to meet his, he chuckled lightly.“Was that a no?” he questioned, and I looked at him blankly.“ A no to what?”Rocco chuckled loudly. “Aww, Tesoro, you are funny.” He reached for my hand, and squeezed it gently, before sitting back again, like he was second guessing his actions. “You said you wanted to talk. I asked if you were going to tell me what about. So, I am asking again, what it was about. Did I miss something exciting while locked away in my office?” and I could tell with his words he was teasing me. Making light of the fact I had not been paying attention, while at the same time being desperately curious about what I wanted to speak with him about...I nod
Aria is there. So close. In front of me. And her scent is taking over my senses. My mind is in a spin. It is taking all my strength to stop myself placing my lips on hers... kiss her the in the way I have so desperately missed. Maybe to find the mark I created to make her my own... In truth, I am not sure what happened. We were talking one second, laughing even, and the next, her face was resting within the palm of my hand, our eyes locked… my heart was racing at an unnatural speed. The warmth of contentment rushed over me as for a moment I felt her return to me. I knew this would not last, as she still had no clue who I was to her, nor her to me, but at that moment, I was looking into the heart of my mate. The one I loved, and she was allowing me to…I traced the soft skin of her face with my thumb, and I saw a slight shiver of her body under my touch and I could not help but wonder if she was responding to our matebond. Does she feel the effects? Each time we touch the tingles, the
I had stepped from the shower, warm and refreshed once again. And in some new pajamas. My hair was braided by the lovely nurse who seemed to enjoy her time with me, and was frequently offering to sit with me to brush my hair, or simply sit and keep me company. It was something I think I may be more willing to accept in the future…“Ah, you look so much better, dear.” She smiled at me from the side of my bed as I sat myself down upon it, finding myself tired after the shower. I was finding that standing did seem to take it out of me more than I expected, so after a shower I often needed to rest, as ridiculous as that may seem.“Just tired now.” I smiled in response.“Aww, you always are, right?” she tickled at my toes. “If I could lend you my wolf I would. Give you a little boost.” She winked at me, and I found myself chuckling.“I could sure do with a boost. Maybe she could mak
I had been busy in the office all morning, having thankfully managed to avoid both of my parents by an early rising this morning, and grabbing breakfast in the packhouse dining room. The downside to that meant so many pack members decided to see this as an opportunity to make conversation with me, all seeming to want updates on my mate. Especially after many had seen us spending time yesterday. To them, that was a sign of positivity. A sign she was on the mend and that all was good. They wanted an update on their Beta mate...In truth, being faced with so many questions and no real answers as of yet was probably harder than it would have been to deal with my parents. Maybe staying at home for breakfast was the better option after all, because right now it hurt not to be able to answer my pack. And to see them so happy and excited about the prospect that my mate was healing… little did they know she had never felt further from me.It had not taken long until my mind could take no more