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63 ~ Smile
Terakhir Diperbarui:
2025-04-29 16:39:22
Bab terkait
Dying to Love You 64 ~ Excludes You
I woke up drowning.That's what it felt like anyway— lungs full of concrete, each breath a battle I wasn't sure I'd win. For several terrifying seconds, I couldn't move, couldn't call out. Just lay there, paralyzed, as my chest heaved uselessly against the invisible weight crushing it.Then muscle memory kicked in. I rolled to my side, grabbed the inhaler from my nightstand, and took two desperate puffs. The medication helped, but only barely , like throwing a cup of water on a forest fire.Rafael slept on beside me, oblivious. Thank God for small mercies. I'd gotten good at these silent struggles, trained my body to fight quietly so I wouldn't wake him. Let him sleep while he could. There would be plenty of sleepless nights in his future.Once I could breathe somewhat normally again, I checked the time. 4 38 am. Too early to get up, too late to hope for more rest. I slipped carefully from the bed, steadying myself against the wall when a wave of dizziness hit.Midnight materialized
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-30Dying to Love You 65 ~ It's Enough
"You need to leave," Rafael said quietly, and something in his tone must have finally registered with Marcus because he actually shut up."Fine." Marcus began gathering his papers. "But when you change your mind,band you will, once things get bad enough, don't expect the offer to still be on the table.""Jesus Christ," Damien muttered. "You really are a piece of work."Marcus turned to him with a sneer. "And what exactly is your contribution here? Besides enabling her self-destructive choices?""My contribution," Damien said, standing up so quickly his chair scraped loudly against the floor, "is respecting my friend enough to support what she wants instead of what benefits your fucking quarterly bonus."Before I could intervene, Marcus made a fatal mistake, he laughed. A short, dismissive sound that landed like a match on gasoline.Damien's fist connected with Marcus's jaw with a crack that made the nearest customers gasp. Marcus stumbled backward, knocking over a display of pastry b
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-30Dying to Love You 66 ~ Wedding
We sat like that for a while, his chin resting on top of my head, my ear against his heart. Outside, rain began to tap against the windows, a soft percussion accompanying our silence."I have an idea." Rafael said suddenly. "Not the ocean, but maybe the next best thing.""What?"He grinned, that rakish smile that had first caught my attention a decade ago on the playground. "Trust me?""Always," I said, meaning it down to my bones.He disappeared into the bedroom, returning with an armful of blankets and pillows. "Close your eyes.""Raf — ""Humor me Sunny."I sighed but complied, listening as he moved around the living room. There was the sound of furniture being pushed aside, blankets being arranged, something electronic being plugged in."Okay," he said eventually. "You can look now."I opened my eyes to find our living room transformed. He'd created a nest of blankets and pillows on the floor, surrounded by every candle we owned, all flickering softly. The blinds were drawn again
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-04-30Dying to Love You 67 ~ Confirmation
RAFAEL~I'd never driven so fast in my life.Sam was slumped in the passenger seat, her breathing shallow and ragged. Each labored gasp tore through me like physical pain. Her lips had taken on that bluish tint that had been showing up more frequently lately, but never this bad. Never this fucking terrifying."Stay with me Sunny," I kept saying, like a prayer or a command. "We 're almost there. Just stay with me."Her hand found mine across the console, squeezing weakly. Even now, she was trying to comfort me. Fucking typical.The ER entrance loomed ahead, harsh fluorescent lights spilling onto the wet pavement. I barely put the car in park before jumping out and running to her side. By the time I'd yanked her door open, a nurse was already rushing toward us with a wheelchair."Cystic fibrosis," I blurted out as I helped transfer Sam. "She can't breathe."The nurse nodded crisply. "We'll take it from here, sir.""I'm coming with her.""You need to park your car and —" "Fuck the car.
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-05-01Dying to Love You 68 ~ Funeral Arrangements
I followed him robotically to a small consultation room with faded motivational posters and chairs that had seen better decades. He gestured for me to sit. I remained standing."....how long?" I asked.He sighed, running a hand through his hair, a surprisingly human gesture from someone I'd always seen as part of the medical machine. "It's not that simple.""Don't fucking patronize me," I snapped. "How. Long.""With aggressive treatment, maybe a few months." His voice was gentle but unflinching. "Without it, weeks. But Rafael, quality of life is a significant — ""Weeks?" The word came out strangled. "As in, less than months? As in—" I couldn't finish."I've been treating Sam since she was five," Dr. Aaron said, his professional demeanor softening. "Her disease has always been aggressive, but she's fought harder than anyone I've ever seen. The fact that she's made it to nineteen is actually remarkable."I sank into one of the uncomfortable chairs, legs suddenly unable to support me.
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-05-01Dying to Love You 69 ~ Deal With It
Sam lay propped up on pillows, an oxygen mask obscuring half her face, IVs running into both arms. She looked impossibly small and fragile against the white hospital sheets, but her eyes—. those warm brown eyes that had captivated me since we were kids, still held their spark.They found mine immediately, widening slightly. She knew. She could see that I finally understood the truth."Hey," I said, my voice rough as I approached her bedside.She pulled the mask aside. "Hey yourself." Her voice was a raspy whisper."Don't —" I gestured to the mask. "You need that.""Need to talk to you more." She replaced it briefly, took a deep breath, then moved it again. "Aaron told you?"I nodded, unable to speak past the knot in my throat."I'm sorry," she whispered. "For lying.""Don't." I took her hand carefully, mindful of the IV. "Don't apologize. Not for any of it.""Mad at me?""Fucking furious," I admitted, bringing her hand to my lips. "But... not at you. At this. At everything."She smile
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-05-01Dying to Love You 70 ~ Sterile Prison
SAMANTHA~It was my third consecutive day in this sterile prison, watching the same nurse check my vitals for the twentieth time. Antiseptic and plastic and something else, something that whispered 'you might not leave this time'I'd gotten good at ignoring that whisper over the years."You're looking better today," Nurse Elaine said, adjusting my oxygen flow. Her cheerfulness seemed forced, which meant I probably looked like absolute shit. " Your sister brought some things from home."May had dumped a tote bag on the visitor chair earlier before rushing back to the bakery. Inside was my journal, some clean pajamas, and the instant camera Rafael had gotten me last Christmas. The sight of it made my chest ache in a way that had nothing to do with my lungs."Thanks," I managed, my voice scratchy from the oxygen tube. "Any word on when I can go home?"Elaine's smile tightened. "Dr. Mitchell will be by later to discuss that. Try to rest now."The standard non-answer. I was getting better
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-05-01Dying to Love You 71 ~ Always Beautiful
We lay like that for a few minutes, his heartbeat steady against my cheek. I tried to memorize the feeling, storing it away with all the other moments I wanted to carry with me wherever souls go after bodies fail them."So what's this big project?" Rafael finally asked, gesturing to the album.I opened it to the first page, where I'd already placed the photo of us after my constellation tattoo. "I want to organize these better. Put them in order.""Okay..." He sounded confused but willing. "why now?"I chose my words carefully. "Because I need to know that you'll remember the good parts. Not just... this." I gestured vaguely at the hospital room, the oxygen tank, my too-thin body.Understanding dawned in his eyes, followed quickly by that flash of pain he couldn't quite hide anymore. "Sam —""Please," I interrupted. "I need to do this."He studied my face for a long moment, then nodded. "Alright, Sunny. Let's organize some memories."I handed him the stack of instant photos I'd been c
Terakhir Diperbarui : 2025-05-01
Bab terbaru
Dying to Love You 75 ~ Gone
By the time I finished, tears were streaming freely down my face. Sam reached up, brushing them away with trembling fingers."That's the most beautiful thing anyone's ever written for me," she whispered.I shook my head, unable to speak through the knot in my throat."Rafael," she said, her voice suddenly stronger, demanding my attention. "Look at me please.."I met her gaze, those brown eyes still so vibrant in her pale face."I need you to promise me something.""Anything," I repeated, meaning it completely."Live," she said simply. "Not just exist. Not just go through the motions. Really live, enough for both of us."I started to shake my head, but she pressed a finger to my lips."You can do it," she insisted. "You're the strongest person I've ever known, even if you don't see it. Promise me you'll try.""I promise," I whispered against her finger, the words a covenant I wasn't sure I could keep but would die trying.She smiled then, soft and sad and somehow peaceful. "I'm tired,
Dying to Love You 74 ~ Happy Birthday
Sam stirred as the door closed behind the nurse, blinking sleepily at the transformed room."What.... how did you...?" Her eyes widened as she took in the decorations."Like it?" I asked, suddenly nervous. Maybe it was too much, too obvious a reminder of what we were celebrating, and what we were losing.But her face lit up, the most genuine smile I'd seen in days spreading across her pale features. "It's beautiful."I helped her sit up, adjusting pillows behind her back. "May's bringing you something to wear. Said your current fashion statement"—I gestured to the hospital gown— "wasn't birthday appropriate."As if on cue, May poked her head through the door, her arms full of bags. "Am I interrupting?""Never," Sam replied, holding out her arms for a hug.May set down her burdens and embraced her sister carefully, her eyes meeting mine over Sam's shoulder. I saw the same knowledge there that lived in my chest, the awareness that this might be the last birthday, the last hug, the last
Dying to Love You 73 ~ Balloons
RAFAEL~I'd been awake since four in the morning, watching the sunrise from the uncomfortable vinyl chair beside Sam's hospital bed. The soft, golden light crept through the blinds, painting stripes across her sleeping face. Nineteen years ago today, she'd come into this world. I wasn't going to let her leave it without making today matter."You're staring again" she mumbled, eyes still closed."Can't help it." I leaned forward, brushing hair from her forehead. "Happy birthday, Sunny."She blinked awake, those brown eyes finding mine. Even after a week in the hospital, even with the oxygen tubes and the pallor of her skin, she was still the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen."Is it?" she asked, voice raspy. "Happy?"I forced a smile. "I'm gonna make sure it is."The doctors had pulled me aside yesterday, speaking in those careful, measured tones they use when delivering death sentences. Words like 'rapid deterioration' and 'comfort measures' that really meant she was slipping away
Dying to Love You 72 ~ Ending Too Soon
Rafael's kisses grew deeper, more urgent, his tongue sliding against mine in a way that made me forget about oxygen tubes and IV lines. His hand slipped lower, skating across my stomach to the waistband of my pajama pants."Is this okay?" he asked, always careful, always checking."Yes." I breathed. "Please.."His fingers dipped beneath the elastic, finding me already wet for him. I bit my lip to keep from moaning as he stroked me, knowing exactly how to touch me after so many months together."Fuck I love you" he whispered against my neck, his fingers circling in that perfect rhythm that made my toes curl. "Love you so fucking much, Sunny."I clutched at his shoulders, rocking against his hand. "Love you too. Don't stop."He didn't, working me steadily toward the edge, his mouth capturing mine to swallow my gasps. Release crashed over me suddenly, my body tensing then melting as pleasure rippled outward.Rafael held me through it, murmuring soft praise against my skin until my breath
Dying to Love You 71 ~ Always Beautiful
We lay like that for a few minutes, his heartbeat steady against my cheek. I tried to memorize the feeling, storing it away with all the other moments I wanted to carry with me wherever souls go after bodies fail them."So what's this big project?" Rafael finally asked, gesturing to the album.I opened it to the first page, where I'd already placed the photo of us after my constellation tattoo. "I want to organize these better. Put them in order.""Okay..." He sounded confused but willing. "why now?"I chose my words carefully. "Because I need to know that you'll remember the good parts. Not just... this." I gestured vaguely at the hospital room, the oxygen tank, my too-thin body.Understanding dawned in his eyes, followed quickly by that flash of pain he couldn't quite hide anymore. "Sam —""Please," I interrupted. "I need to do this."He studied my face for a long moment, then nodded. "Alright, Sunny. Let's organize some memories."I handed him the stack of instant photos I'd been c
Dying to Love You 70 ~ Sterile Prison
SAMANTHA~It was my third consecutive day in this sterile prison, watching the same nurse check my vitals for the twentieth time. Antiseptic and plastic and something else, something that whispered 'you might not leave this time'I'd gotten good at ignoring that whisper over the years."You're looking better today," Nurse Elaine said, adjusting my oxygen flow. Her cheerfulness seemed forced, which meant I probably looked like absolute shit. " Your sister brought some things from home."May had dumped a tote bag on the visitor chair earlier before rushing back to the bakery. Inside was my journal, some clean pajamas, and the instant camera Rafael had gotten me last Christmas. The sight of it made my chest ache in a way that had nothing to do with my lungs."Thanks," I managed, my voice scratchy from the oxygen tube. "Any word on when I can go home?"Elaine's smile tightened. "Dr. Mitchell will be by later to discuss that. Try to rest now."The standard non-answer. I was getting better
Dying to Love You 69 ~ Deal With It
Sam lay propped up on pillows, an oxygen mask obscuring half her face, IVs running into both arms. She looked impossibly small and fragile against the white hospital sheets, but her eyes—. those warm brown eyes that had captivated me since we were kids, still held their spark.They found mine immediately, widening slightly. She knew. She could see that I finally understood the truth."Hey," I said, my voice rough as I approached her bedside.She pulled the mask aside. "Hey yourself." Her voice was a raspy whisper."Don't —" I gestured to the mask. "You need that.""Need to talk to you more." She replaced it briefly, took a deep breath, then moved it again. "Aaron told you?"I nodded, unable to speak past the knot in my throat."I'm sorry," she whispered. "For lying.""Don't." I took her hand carefully, mindful of the IV. "Don't apologize. Not for any of it.""Mad at me?""Fucking furious," I admitted, bringing her hand to my lips. "But... not at you. At this. At everything."She smile
Dying to Love You 68 ~ Funeral Arrangements
I followed him robotically to a small consultation room with faded motivational posters and chairs that had seen better decades. He gestured for me to sit. I remained standing."....how long?" I asked.He sighed, running a hand through his hair, a surprisingly human gesture from someone I'd always seen as part of the medical machine. "It's not that simple.""Don't fucking patronize me," I snapped. "How. Long.""With aggressive treatment, maybe a few months." His voice was gentle but unflinching. "Without it, weeks. But Rafael, quality of life is a significant — ""Weeks?" The word came out strangled. "As in, less than months? As in—" I couldn't finish."I've been treating Sam since she was five," Dr. Aaron said, his professional demeanor softening. "Her disease has always been aggressive, but she's fought harder than anyone I've ever seen. The fact that she's made it to nineteen is actually remarkable."I sank into one of the uncomfortable chairs, legs suddenly unable to support me.
Dying to Love You 67 ~ Confirmation
RAFAEL~I'd never driven so fast in my life.Sam was slumped in the passenger seat, her breathing shallow and ragged. Each labored gasp tore through me like physical pain. Her lips had taken on that bluish tint that had been showing up more frequently lately, but never this bad. Never this fucking terrifying."Stay with me Sunny," I kept saying, like a prayer or a command. "We 're almost there. Just stay with me."Her hand found mine across the console, squeezing weakly. Even now, she was trying to comfort me. Fucking typical.The ER entrance loomed ahead, harsh fluorescent lights spilling onto the wet pavement. I barely put the car in park before jumping out and running to her side. By the time I'd yanked her door open, a nurse was already rushing toward us with a wheelchair."Cystic fibrosis," I blurted out as I helped transfer Sam. "She can't breathe."The nurse nodded crisply. "We'll take it from here, sir.""I'm coming with her.""You need to park your car and —" "Fuck the car.
