The field I was currently standing in was beautiful.
The grass was long and green, moving like water in the wind. There were clumps of colorful flowers popping up, drawing my eye immediately to them. Some of the plants seemed to be… glowing. So brightly colored they hurt my eyes to look at. The trees lining the edge of the field were tall and old looking, seemingly reaching out to touch the dark night sky with their twisted fingers. In some of them I could see thick rope with frayed ends swaying from the lower down branches. An image of children climbing all over those ancient trees flashed in my mind. In the distance, lights could be seen and voices could be heard. I could hear evening doves cooing, and bugs singing their song. I could hear the deep croaking of toads coming from a pond pushed in the back corner of the field. It was what I would imagine a fairy tale sounding and looking like. I half expected a deer to come up and nuzzle my neck.
“You look like you’re thinking really hard about something.” I spun around at the sound of a sudden voice, making eye contact with a familiar face. I had definitely seen this man somewhere before, but I couldn't quite place where…
He was tall and wide, and you could see the cut of muscle under his soft looking t-shirt. He walked like he was on his way to declare God himself his nemesis, leaning forward and with his giant fists permanently clenched. His hair was slightly unkempt and dark, his eyes, the deepest shade of blue I’ve ever seen a pair of eyes before. And despite his seemingly aggressive stance, he didn’t scare me or make me feel unwelcome. He stopped in front of me, his eyes scanning me over.
“This place is really pretty.” I reply lamely, almost in a whisper, not really sure what else to say. He took a step closer, and I watched him wearily. It crossed my mind that I was at a complete disadvantage physically to him, but I tried to push that thought aside. “Where have I seen you before?” I ask instead. The familiarity of his face was bugging the crap out of me.
“I’ve always been in your dreams.” He replies, taking another step towards me.
“My….dreams?” I furrow my brow. Somewhere deep down I think I knew this isn’t real, but it’s hard to wrap my head around.
He chuckles at my contorted face, and I feel my heart flipping a little with the sweet, deep sound of his laugh. I feel like I've heard it before. Something is festering around inside me at the sound of his laugh, telling me to wake up from the distorted reality I’m in.
Where is this feeling coming from? It’s faint, so I push it to the back of my mind and try to focus on the person in front of me.
He’s edging closer to me now, so much so that I can smell the earthy scent coming off of him and see the splash of freckles across his tan face. I imagine he got them from laying in this field when the sun is out. I can feel the tension shooting between us both, and it only thickens when I shoot my eyes up to meet his. What was this feeling passing in between us? Why did I feel like I knew him? It’s driving me crazy.
“Want to sit down?” He asks. He must’ve seen me admiring the soft appearance of the grass before.
He sits first, and I follow, for lack of anything better to do. I was right: the grass feels like threads of silk. I run my hands through it as though it were a girl's hair. I start at the roots, curling my fingertips slightly into the soft earth, and then slowly run a handful of grass through my fingers. I can’t help myself, I lay down, giggling a little. I continue to run my hands through the thick grass, thinking about how easy it would be to sleep here. The cool night breeze smells like cotton and dreams, and for a second I think I almost do fall asleep.
That strange laugh makes me sit up suddenly though, making me aware of what a fool I’m making of myself in front of a perfect stranger.
“It’s nice, I know.” He hesitates, and then lays down. “When I was little I used to sneak away from my home and come to this field. Everyone knows it’s here, but no one comes here because they know it’s mine.”
“Am I invading your space?” I ask, inching a bit closer to him. He smirks, shaking his head.
“You wouldn't be here if I didn’t want you to be.” I lay down after he says this, angling my body so that we’re touching at the hips. The tiny amount of physical contact makes my arms tingle.
Why did I want to be closer to him? I wanted to curl up in a ball in his arms. I’d never been good at flirting, I don’t even think you could say I had ever done it before, but I definitely felt like I was now. I glance at him through my lashes, and feel my heart jump when I find him already looking at me. I avert my eyes quickly, settling on the sky instead.
Who is this boy?
He looks up at the big moon with me, and I find my gaze drifting, turning to look at his eyes so that I can see the moon’s reflection in them. Sure enough, it’s like I’m staring into a lake’s surface. “I grew up a mile or so that way,” he points towards the tree line ahead of us. I turned away from his face to follow his pointed finger, where I saw the lights and heard voices earlier. “I grew up with ten younger brothers and sisters.”“That’s a lot of siblings.” I say, looking back at his handsome face. His jaw is clean and sharp looking, his lips thick, with a scar going through the top and lower right corner. It has a brother, going across his right eye. I move my gaze down to his neck, where I can see dark blue lines wrapping around from the back. I gently nudge his jawline, and he complies, twisting his head so I can see the back of his neck. I try to ignore the spark I feel when I touch his skin. A large circle tattoo, which is sliced like a pie, is on the back of his neck. Each
I snap awake, and become aware of everything all at once. The back of my neck is drenched in sweat. My dog is staring at me. It was only a dream. After the last realization, a kind of hole forms in the middle of my chest, and I can feel tears burning at the corners of my eyes. All traces of wonder and hope that came with being in a good dream washed away as my consciousness returned. I sit up, and hold my dog's head in my hands. “It was just a dream.” I tell her, and she responds by licking her waggly chops. I sigh, and let go of her face. I throw my blanket off of me, and perch on the edge of the bed. I can see my reflection in the tall black framed mirror that I have leaning against the wall across the room. My dark brown eyes look wide and wild. My shoulder length black hair is matted in the back, making it look thicker than it usually is. Even from across the room I can tell it looks like I’ve just seen a ghost.Dream or not, that was intense. I rub my fingers together, and
“I got this.” I say to my mother, stretching my neck forward to see the front of the line.It’s been four days since my dream. The day of the dream, I hadn’t really done anything. I fed my dog breakfast and then went back to bed until three, until I had to get up and get ready for work at five. Work had been busy, a pleasant distraction from thinking about my dream. The next few days after that I spent mostly trying to occupy my mind. I cleaned the house and my room, gave my dog a bath, sorted out some clothes to sell for extra cash, stuff like that. My mom thought I was on drugs and I think she was seriously considering buying an at home drug test.I’ve obviously slept since then, and no dreams like that have happened again. I had a dream that I was a mermaid trapped in disney world, and I swear, I could see the guy from the field standing outside my tank, watching me with those blue eyes that captured the moon so perfectly. I mean I know he had said he was from my dreams but... I h
That night I didn't get home until almost four in the morning. I worked a late shift at the twenty four hour dinner I had been at for a couple years now, and since I could now drive myself home, I decided to go through a drive thru and eat my dinner in the parking lot. I was fully, all the way, avoiding my own dreams. What my mom had said earlier kind of… shook me. I sat in the empty parking lot for almost a whole hour, just thinking about everything that was clogging up my brain gears recently. I had compiled a list of observations: One: this guy was obviously some miserable creation my own lonely mind created to compensate for the lack of male presence in my life. I mean, I had no dad, no boyfriend or even a close male friend for that matter. That was bound to cause some inner turmoil, right?Two: my mother probably thought I was dreaming about becoming a doctor and wanted me to take that into consideration when choosing what I was going to college for, and that’s why she acted l
I shake my head, and turn to my right, making my way through the treeline, trying to push that very strange encounter to the back of my mind. The forest is pleasantly thick, but not so thick that I can’t see far enough ahead of me. I walk for about ten minutes before I can see a house to my left a few hundred feet ahead. I assume that’s the boy’s house, which hopefully means the field shouldn’t be too much farther ahead. I have no idea if that’s actually true, since I’ve only been here one time and in one place. But I was trying to be hopeful. I walk quickly, feeling slightly pressed for time. Last time it was days before I could come back, what if it’s longer this time? What if it’s a week, or a month, or a year? I don’t really know this boy too much, but for some reason the thought of not seeing him for a year makes my heart knot up. I laughed at myself a little. I had dreaded coming back here so much, but really only because I knew how much it would hurt to get ripped away from it
This time when my eyes snap open, I’m not feeling so sad and lonely. I’m confused as ever and a little irritated. Scratch that, a lot irritated. He knew going in for a kiss would scare the shit out of me, and used it to wake me up. I sit up, trying to process what I just “dreamt” about. Who were those people trying to find me? Why was that guy so scared of them? Scared might not have been the right word… but he was definitely wary of them to say the least.And who was that that called for me? I could remember the exact pitch of his voice calling out into the night. “Little flower…” I feel almost… regretful… that I didn’t see the face it belonged to.I shake my head, focusing on what really mattered. Were my dreams more than dreams? Was this a real place and a real person I was visiting and talking to? It was seeming more and more like that was the case. I felt insane even thinking that, but what was I supposed to think at this point?I sat there in my bed for a few minutes collecti
It was almost two in the afternoon before I finally gave up. I closed my laptop that I’d had to plug in while I used it from draining the battery, and tossed it on the foot of my bed. I had let my dog out hours ago. She had no interest in research, only in frockling in the back yard. I left my room, shutting my wooden door a bit forcefully behind me. The house was cool and quiet, all I could hear was my mom’s cat padding around somewhere. I stood there in the hallway for a moment, staring at a picture of my dad that hung on the wall, along with various other pictures. We had gone on a fishing trip; I was only four and the small perch my mother had photographed me holding had felt like a shark in size to little me. My dad died when I was eight, from a heart attack. I loved him, and I miss him every day I walk down this hallway and see these pictures of him, smiling and frozen in time. That gives me an idea. My legs and mind kick into gear with the fresh thought seared into my min
She stares at the picture, as though what I’m saying is irrelevant. She backs up and flops down into one of the brown armchairs taking up a corner of the room. Her eyes stare off a little, and she sighs. It’s a good minute before she says anything, and when she does, it’s like she’s talking to herself rather than to me. “Your father and I used to live in a really crappy town down south before we moved here and started over. We were young and broke and couldn’t afford anything better. So we ended up living in kind of a dump around people who gave us nothing but bad memories… especially your father. We moved there to get away from people, to be by ourselves. You know already my parents weren’t very nice, and your father’s died when he was young. I was tired of living under the same roof as them and your dad… well he didn’t care where we went. He always said he just wanted to be by my side. So we settled for less, just to get away. It just caused trouble for us, though. At first, every
Hello, Child. I sigh in happiness as I finally lay on the roots of my Alder almost an hour later. Chepi had brought her stool and her knitting again and was focused on it.But the conversation I wanted to have with my Alder was extra private today.I have something I want to ask you. I think, feeling a little silly.A secret from this woman you claim to trust. I nod against its roots. Ask away, child.Do you know anything about the Gud species? I turn away from Chepi and curl into a ball, closing my eyes and listening to the tree's words in my head.The Gud species is, as you suspect, descended from the original God, Forradd, who had great powers. He could change forms, manipulate the earth, and even time itself. Now Forradd was desperately in love with Sanju, the original goddess.I laugh a little. It kind of seemed like everyone's problems could be chalked up to loving someone.Pay attention. Sanju was originally a normal Alva, which is why she's depicted as having pointed ears, and
I sit up quickly, inhaling air into my lungs and looking around wildly.I was back in Erik's bed. But it was morning now, sun was streaming in through the window. I could hear wind chimes outside and smell bread baking somewhere. It felt early, but I remember it had been dark in my dream. I had lost a few hours.I rub my eyes, thinking about last night.That was the first time I had traveled through a dream since I came here. And this time no one could see me. The last time I was very much visible and interacted with people and talked. This time it was like I wasn't even there.The Gud species.I needed to find a way to find out about them. They seemed to be important. Honestly, the word kind of sounded like "God," and I wondered if they were the male version of the Gudinna species. Erik had said it was a line of women that descended from the original goddess, so with that in mind, was there a line of men that came from the original god? Was there an original god? I had way too many q
Soft footsteps approach my sleeping form in the window. My head leaned against the frame, the book I had made it halfway through open on my lap. The sun had set hours ago, the moon was but a hunk in the sky now, but still shone brightly on my sleeping figure."Sweet flower..." Erik approaches me, gently wrapping a strand of my hair around his finger when he does.He takes the book, closes it, and sets it on the ground beside the window. He scoops me up gently in his arms and carries me to his bed, where he brushes aside the curtain and crawls in with me in his arms.He sets me down like I'm made of glass and brushes my hair away from my face."Sleep well, my goddess." My heart tugs as he leaves, instead of curling up with me like I wanted him to.Where was he going?I could feel myself following him out of his room, but my body remained in his bed.I was dreaming, I knew that now. This wasn't like before, though. I drifted all through his house and outside, where he turned right and
"It's just over the hill now!" Reni calls from the front of the group of Alva. We had left early that morning, after I evidently fell asleep quite well, and had been walking for several hours now. It had taken a little longer than originally said, but it was still just after midday when Reni announced we were growing close.I slow and watch the other Alva disappearing over the hill, Erik last. I could tell he was anxious to get back to his land, but he was still lingering behind everyone else for my sake. I stood at the top once I reached it for a moment, taking it all in.I hadn't had a good vantage point of the land so far, Vacket, as Erik called it. From up here though, I could see it all.I could see Erik's house to the left, surrounded by tons of trees and mostly separated from the other buildings. Maybe a half mile down from his large estate was what I think was the medical wing. It sat atop a hill, and I could see a grove of weeping willows not far from it. I remember when I f
"Are you tired?" I look away from Reni and the other chatting Alva and to Erik, who is looking me up and down like he's checking for injuries.I shrug. "I guess." He ushers me towards the platform and behind the half wall, and sure enough, there is a large nest of clothes and animal pelts.He kneels down then on one knee and pats his bent one with his hand. "Give me your foot." I comply, watching him curiously as he starts removing my shoe. I can hear his men laughing a few feet away, but I can only focus on his gentle fingers untying the soft leather strings. "The other." He says once he's slid it off and set it aside. This foot is the one that still bears his anklet, and I saw him notice right away. "You still wear it." He says as he unties my shoe. I nod, even though he isn't looking at me. "Has anyone told you of its meaning?" He looks up at me, pulling my shoe off as he does. I shake my head, feigning ignorance. No one did tell me its meaning, I just happened to overhear it. He s
I eye the moving water that shimmers in the moonlight. I looked up. It was only half sized, but still shone quite brightly. It also seemed... closer in this world than in my old one. If that was even possible.I creep down to the water's edge. I didn't plan on taking my clothes off all the way. I don't have a towel, or soap, or a change of clothes. But I do sit on the shore and take my shoes off to soak my feet in the water. My feet hurt; I'd done more walking today through rough terrain than I'd ever done before. I sigh and close my eyes in relief at being freed from the tiny shoes I'd been given by Larkin.The water is cool when I finally wade into it, and the rocks stab into my feet. I look at my toes in the water.What a wild ride this has been.I missed my mom, and my home, but I was starting to get comfortable with Erik and the other Alva, which scared me a little. Was I really thinking about staying here? My mom said I wasn't allowed back, but did she mean that? If I showed up
"We'll stop here for the night."We'd been walking for hours, past even when the sun went down. Erik had kept suggesting we stop while glancing over at me, and Reni kept insisting we could make it home in just a few hours if we kept going. They went back and forth like that for a while, until Erik saw me stumble over a tree branch and decided I was simply too tired to continue, and we would be making camp for the night. I wasn't not tired, but I didn't want to slow everyone else down even more than I already was. Erik had said they'd gotten here in six hours on their own, but with me, we were already touching the ten-hour mark.Appparently I was quite slow.We'd found a half-crumbled building, the roof was gone, but the remaining walls stood twenty feet high. It would protect us from wild animals while we slept, Reni said with a firm nod as she examined the area."I'll make you a bed up here." Erik tells me. There's a raised platform that looks like it was once a kitchen, with half of
"Hm." Erik hums. He sighs, and looks away, then falls back and sits in front of me. He scoots as close as he can without sitting on the ring of flowers around me. They've stopped growing out, and are just getting thicker now, and starting to get a bit taller, I think. "Why does this make you a... "Dick." He puts air quotes around the word I'd used to describe myself. He probably had never used it like that before, and it sounded a little funny coming from him.I scoff and shake my head. "You don't care that I kissed him?" Why was I getting upset that he wasn't mad? I wasn't handling this well, but I couldn't stop for some reason. I think I was just irritated."I don't love it." He says gently. "But you also claim he left because you had made your choice already." I roll my eyes."Of course that's all you care about.""Would you like me to ask you how his lips taste?" I shoot him a glare, and he shakes his head. "I am sorry you're upset, my flower. But if you have truly made your choic
"Okay." Is all I say to Larkin. I have so much more in me though. I wish we could've spent more time together. I wish I could've known you better. I wanted to know what he looked like in the morning, and what he was scared of, and what he loved. I wanted to meet his siblings and learn about his life here. But I guess we were skipping all of that. We were going from epic, star crossed lovers, to strangers.In just a second.I hope we're together, in another life.He doesn't say anything, just walks off back towards where we came. I stand there, my heart beating in my chest, my blood flowing in my ears, and tears burning at my throat.That hurt, I can't lie.I say once again, I've never had a boyfriend, or a whatever the hell Larkin was to me. So, I'd never had to deal with letting someone like that go.It fucking hurt.I let a sob escape my lips and fall back against a tree, sliding down it and burying my face in my knees, sobbing like a child. I hated that in the end, we just ended u