He looks up at the big moon with me, and I find my gaze drifting, turning to look at his eyes so that I can see the moon’s reflection in them. Sure enough, it’s like I’m staring into a lake’s surface. “I grew up a mile or so that way,” he points towards the tree line ahead of us. I turned away from his face to follow his pointed finger, where I saw the lights and heard voices earlier. “I grew up with ten younger brothers and sisters.”
“That’s a lot of siblings.” I say, looking back at his handsome face. His jaw is clean and sharp looking, his lips thick, with a scar going through the top and lower right corner. It has a brother, going across his right eye. I move my gaze down to his neck, where I can see dark blue lines wrapping around from the back. I gently nudge his jawline, and he complies, twisting his head so I can see the back of his neck. I try to ignore the spark I feel when I touch his skin. A large circle tattoo, which is sliced like a pie, is on the back of his neck. Each slice has smaller drawings in it, but he looks back at me before I have enough time to study each one.
I move on to his chest, which is broad looking, as though he works out every day. Tons of physical labor was probably more accurate. Something about him and this place made me feel like he wasn’t spending his free time lifting weights in the gym. And his muscles weren't super defined and cut looking, but they were definitely big and present.
“I do a lot of the hard work.” He smiles at my blushing cheeks. His legs are long and covered by dark brown pants, and his feet are huge, covered by scruffy looking wool socks. I was noticing he was… abnormally tall.
“You shouldn’t walk around barefoot.” I say. I feel silly as he looks down at my bare toes, which are painted a pale pink that I thought complimented my tan complexion nicely. He nudges my foot with his as though emphasizing the ridiculousness of my statement.
His eyes travel up my body, and even though I had just done the same to him, I am suddenly aware of the fact that I’m only in a thin tank top and cotton shorts. I’d never been lacking in the chest department, and the top stopped a bit too low for my taste. I cough, wiggling around a bit.
“Why are we here?” I ask, playing with the hem of my top. He chuckles, and graciously plays along with my subject change.
He scratches the back of his neck, avoiding my gaze suddenly. He grabs a handful of grass and rips it from the earth. I flinch a little, but ignore it and focus on him. He stares at the ground, ripping the grass into smaller and smaller pieces for a long moment before speaking again.
“I’ve been waiting for the right time to talk to you since you were born… but now I think I may have waited too long.” I sit up now, listening fully.
“Explain that, please.” I stare into his eyes, searching for an answer to the mysterious and ominous thing he just said. Something in me was telling me to stop talking to him, to run away, to avoid this conversation.
But an even bigger part of me was demanding answers.
At that moment, everything starts to blur away, like a watercolor painting being washed away in water. The edges of my vision, the huge old pine trees, are melting away. I stood up quickly, my heart rate increasing as the world around me dribbled away rapidly.
“Don’t be scared, you’re just about to wake up.” I calm a little at his hands on my arms suddenly. He stares into my eyes, something in his that I can’t quite place.
“This time, you’re going to remember.”
I snap awake, and become aware of everything all at once. The back of my neck is drenched in sweat. My dog is staring at me. It was only a dream. After the last realization, a kind of hole forms in the middle of my chest, and I can feel tears burning at the corners of my eyes. All traces of wonder and hope that came with being in a good dream washed away as my consciousness returned. I sit up, and hold my dog's head in my hands. “It was just a dream.” I tell her, and she responds by licking her waggly chops. I sigh, and let go of her face. I throw my blanket off of me, and perch on the edge of the bed. I can see my reflection in the tall black framed mirror that I have leaning against the wall across the room. My dark brown eyes look wide and wild. My shoulder length black hair is matted in the back, making it look thicker than it usually is. Even from across the room I can tell it looks like I’ve just seen a ghost.Dream or not, that was intense. I rub my fingers together, and
“I got this.” I say to my mother, stretching my neck forward to see the front of the line.It’s been four days since my dream. The day of the dream, I hadn’t really done anything. I fed my dog breakfast and then went back to bed until three, until I had to get up and get ready for work at five. Work had been busy, a pleasant distraction from thinking about my dream. The next few days after that I spent mostly trying to occupy my mind. I cleaned the house and my room, gave my dog a bath, sorted out some clothes to sell for extra cash, stuff like that. My mom thought I was on drugs and I think she was seriously considering buying an at home drug test.I’ve obviously slept since then, and no dreams like that have happened again. I had a dream that I was a mermaid trapped in disney world, and I swear, I could see the guy from the field standing outside my tank, watching me with those blue eyes that captured the moon so perfectly. I mean I know he had said he was from my dreams but... I h
That night I didn't get home until almost four in the morning. I worked a late shift at the twenty four hour dinner I had been at for a couple years now, and since I could now drive myself home, I decided to go through a drive thru and eat my dinner in the parking lot. I was fully, all the way, avoiding my own dreams. What my mom had said earlier kind of… shook me. I sat in the empty parking lot for almost a whole hour, just thinking about everything that was clogging up my brain gears recently. I had compiled a list of observations: One: this guy was obviously some miserable creation my own lonely mind created to compensate for the lack of male presence in my life. I mean, I had no dad, no boyfriend or even a close male friend for that matter. That was bound to cause some inner turmoil, right?Two: my mother probably thought I was dreaming about becoming a doctor and wanted me to take that into consideration when choosing what I was going to college for, and that’s why she acted l
I shake my head, and turn to my right, making my way through the treeline, trying to push that very strange encounter to the back of my mind. The forest is pleasantly thick, but not so thick that I can’t see far enough ahead of me. I walk for about ten minutes before I can see a house to my left a few hundred feet ahead. I assume that’s the boy’s house, which hopefully means the field shouldn’t be too much farther ahead. I have no idea if that’s actually true, since I’ve only been here one time and in one place. But I was trying to be hopeful. I walk quickly, feeling slightly pressed for time. Last time it was days before I could come back, what if it’s longer this time? What if it’s a week, or a month, or a year? I don’t really know this boy too much, but for some reason the thought of not seeing him for a year makes my heart knot up. I laughed at myself a little. I had dreaded coming back here so much, but really only because I knew how much it would hurt to get ripped away from it
This time when my eyes snap open, I’m not feeling so sad and lonely. I’m confused as ever and a little irritated. Scratch that, a lot irritated. He knew going in for a kiss would scare the shit out of me, and used it to wake me up. I sit up, trying to process what I just “dreamt” about. Who were those people trying to find me? Why was that guy so scared of them? Scared might not have been the right word… but he was definitely wary of them to say the least.And who was that that called for me? I could remember the exact pitch of his voice calling out into the night. “Little flower…” I feel almost… regretful… that I didn’t see the face it belonged to.I shake my head, focusing on what really mattered. Were my dreams more than dreams? Was this a real place and a real person I was visiting and talking to? It was seeming more and more like that was the case. I felt insane even thinking that, but what was I supposed to think at this point?I sat there in my bed for a few minutes collecti
It was almost two in the afternoon before I finally gave up. I closed my laptop that I’d had to plug in while I used it from draining the battery, and tossed it on the foot of my bed. I had let my dog out hours ago. She had no interest in research, only in frockling in the back yard. I left my room, shutting my wooden door a bit forcefully behind me. The house was cool and quiet, all I could hear was my mom’s cat padding around somewhere. I stood there in the hallway for a moment, staring at a picture of my dad that hung on the wall, along with various other pictures. We had gone on a fishing trip; I was only four and the small perch my mother had photographed me holding had felt like a shark in size to little me. My dad died when I was eight, from a heart attack. I loved him, and I miss him every day I walk down this hallway and see these pictures of him, smiling and frozen in time. That gives me an idea. My legs and mind kick into gear with the fresh thought seared into my min
She stares at the picture, as though what I’m saying is irrelevant. She backs up and flops down into one of the brown armchairs taking up a corner of the room. Her eyes stare off a little, and she sighs. It’s a good minute before she says anything, and when she does, it’s like she’s talking to herself rather than to me. “Your father and I used to live in a really crappy town down south before we moved here and started over. We were young and broke and couldn’t afford anything better. So we ended up living in kind of a dump around people who gave us nothing but bad memories… especially your father. We moved there to get away from people, to be by ourselves. You know already my parents weren’t very nice, and your father’s died when he was young. I was tired of living under the same roof as them and your dad… well he didn’t care where we went. He always said he just wanted to be by my side. So we settled for less, just to get away. It just caused trouble for us, though. At first, every
I nod, keep a hold on my one picture of the field, and stand up. Neither me or my mother say anything as I slowly walk to my room. I wanted her to stop me, to tell me she was sorry for saying that and that she would support me in finding out what the hell was happening with me. I wanted to know that even if this didn't work out, I would still have her.But she didn’t. I walked into my room, shutting the door behind me and leaning against it. I close my eyes, slide down the length of it, and bury my face in my hands. I jump a little when I feel my dog’s nose brushing my forearm. I glance up, my throat on fire and my eyes already brimming over with tears.I grab her face in my hands, staring into her aging yellow eyes. She had gray hair all over her face, her lips and ears drooped more every day, and lately she had developed a limp. The vet had just said it was her joints, and apart from a special diet and exercise routine, there was nothing we could do to help her. She was just gett
Hello, Child. I sigh in happiness as I finally lay on the roots of my Alder almost an hour later. Chepi had brought her stool and her knitting again and was focused on it.But the conversation I wanted to have with my Alder was extra private today.I have something I want to ask you. I think, feeling a little silly.A secret from this woman you claim to trust. I nod against its roots. Ask away, child.Do you know anything about the Gud species? I turn away from Chepi and curl into a ball, closing my eyes and listening to the tree's words in my head.The Gud species is, as you suspect, descended from the original God, Forradd, who had great powers. He could change forms, manipulate the earth, and even time itself. Now Forradd was desperately in love with Sanju, the original goddess.I laugh a little. It kind of seemed like everyone's problems could be chalked up to loving someone.Pay attention. Sanju was originally a normal Alva, which is why she's depicted as having pointed ears, and
I sit up quickly, inhaling air into my lungs and looking around wildly.I was back in Erik's bed. But it was morning now, sun was streaming in through the window. I could hear wind chimes outside and smell bread baking somewhere. It felt early, but I remember it had been dark in my dream. I had lost a few hours.I rub my eyes, thinking about last night.That was the first time I had traveled through a dream since I came here. And this time no one could see me. The last time I was very much visible and interacted with people and talked. This time it was like I wasn't even there.The Gud species.I needed to find a way to find out about them. They seemed to be important. Honestly, the word kind of sounded like "God," and I wondered if they were the male version of the Gudinna species. Erik had said it was a line of women that descended from the original goddess, so with that in mind, was there a line of men that came from the original god? Was there an original god? I had way too many q
Soft footsteps approach my sleeping form in the window. My head leaned against the frame, the book I had made it halfway through open on my lap. The sun had set hours ago, the moon was but a hunk in the sky now, but still shone brightly on my sleeping figure."Sweet flower..." Erik approaches me, gently wrapping a strand of my hair around his finger when he does.He takes the book, closes it, and sets it on the ground beside the window. He scoops me up gently in his arms and carries me to his bed, where he brushes aside the curtain and crawls in with me in his arms.He sets me down like I'm made of glass and brushes my hair away from my face."Sleep well, my goddess." My heart tugs as he leaves, instead of curling up with me like I wanted him to.Where was he going?I could feel myself following him out of his room, but my body remained in his bed.I was dreaming, I knew that now. This wasn't like before, though. I drifted all through his house and outside, where he turned right and
"It's just over the hill now!" Reni calls from the front of the group of Alva. We had left early that morning, after I evidently fell asleep quite well, and had been walking for several hours now. It had taken a little longer than originally said, but it was still just after midday when Reni announced we were growing close.I slow and watch the other Alva disappearing over the hill, Erik last. I could tell he was anxious to get back to his land, but he was still lingering behind everyone else for my sake. I stood at the top once I reached it for a moment, taking it all in.I hadn't had a good vantage point of the land so far, Vacket, as Erik called it. From up here though, I could see it all.I could see Erik's house to the left, surrounded by tons of trees and mostly separated from the other buildings. Maybe a half mile down from his large estate was what I think was the medical wing. It sat atop a hill, and I could see a grove of weeping willows not far from it. I remember when I f
"Are you tired?" I look away from Reni and the other chatting Alva and to Erik, who is looking me up and down like he's checking for injuries.I shrug. "I guess." He ushers me towards the platform and behind the half wall, and sure enough, there is a large nest of clothes and animal pelts.He kneels down then on one knee and pats his bent one with his hand. "Give me your foot." I comply, watching him curiously as he starts removing my shoe. I can hear his men laughing a few feet away, but I can only focus on his gentle fingers untying the soft leather strings. "The other." He says once he's slid it off and set it aside. This foot is the one that still bears his anklet, and I saw him notice right away. "You still wear it." He says as he unties my shoe. I nod, even though he isn't looking at me. "Has anyone told you of its meaning?" He looks up at me, pulling my shoe off as he does. I shake my head, feigning ignorance. No one did tell me its meaning, I just happened to overhear it. He s
I eye the moving water that shimmers in the moonlight. I looked up. It was only half sized, but still shone quite brightly. It also seemed... closer in this world than in my old one. If that was even possible.I creep down to the water's edge. I didn't plan on taking my clothes off all the way. I don't have a towel, or soap, or a change of clothes. But I do sit on the shore and take my shoes off to soak my feet in the water. My feet hurt; I'd done more walking today through rough terrain than I'd ever done before. I sigh and close my eyes in relief at being freed from the tiny shoes I'd been given by Larkin.The water is cool when I finally wade into it, and the rocks stab into my feet. I look at my toes in the water.What a wild ride this has been.I missed my mom, and my home, but I was starting to get comfortable with Erik and the other Alva, which scared me a little. Was I really thinking about staying here? My mom said I wasn't allowed back, but did she mean that? If I showed up
"We'll stop here for the night."We'd been walking for hours, past even when the sun went down. Erik had kept suggesting we stop while glancing over at me, and Reni kept insisting we could make it home in just a few hours if we kept going. They went back and forth like that for a while, until Erik saw me stumble over a tree branch and decided I was simply too tired to continue, and we would be making camp for the night. I wasn't not tired, but I didn't want to slow everyone else down even more than I already was. Erik had said they'd gotten here in six hours on their own, but with me, we were already touching the ten-hour mark.Appparently I was quite slow.We'd found a half-crumbled building, the roof was gone, but the remaining walls stood twenty feet high. It would protect us from wild animals while we slept, Reni said with a firm nod as she examined the area."I'll make you a bed up here." Erik tells me. There's a raised platform that looks like it was once a kitchen, with half of
"Hm." Erik hums. He sighs, and looks away, then falls back and sits in front of me. He scoots as close as he can without sitting on the ring of flowers around me. They've stopped growing out, and are just getting thicker now, and starting to get a bit taller, I think. "Why does this make you a... "Dick." He puts air quotes around the word I'd used to describe myself. He probably had never used it like that before, and it sounded a little funny coming from him.I scoff and shake my head. "You don't care that I kissed him?" Why was I getting upset that he wasn't mad? I wasn't handling this well, but I couldn't stop for some reason. I think I was just irritated."I don't love it." He says gently. "But you also claim he left because you had made your choice already." I roll my eyes."Of course that's all you care about.""Would you like me to ask you how his lips taste?" I shoot him a glare, and he shakes his head. "I am sorry you're upset, my flower. But if you have truly made your choic
"Okay." Is all I say to Larkin. I have so much more in me though. I wish we could've spent more time together. I wish I could've known you better. I wanted to know what he looked like in the morning, and what he was scared of, and what he loved. I wanted to meet his siblings and learn about his life here. But I guess we were skipping all of that. We were going from epic, star crossed lovers, to strangers.In just a second.I hope we're together, in another life.He doesn't say anything, just walks off back towards where we came. I stand there, my heart beating in my chest, my blood flowing in my ears, and tears burning at my throat.That hurt, I can't lie.I say once again, I've never had a boyfriend, or a whatever the hell Larkin was to me. So, I'd never had to deal with letting someone like that go.It fucking hurt.I let a sob escape my lips and fall back against a tree, sliding down it and burying my face in my knees, sobbing like a child. I hated that in the end, we just ended u