I didn't run for two days. On the third, I angrily pulled on my running clothes and ran until I almost passed out. I pushed again the following morning. It became my daily stress reliever. A week after leaving the hospital, I called Killian's mother."I tried." I could barely speak because of the sobs built up in my throat."I know, dear. Don't cry. Killian will snap out of it. He's stubborn and doesn't want anyone around right now." Weariness was evident in each word Beth spoke."Have you seen him?""Yes, last night. It wasn't pleasant. If not for his injury, I'd take a two-by-four to his head."The thought of Killian in pain made me cringe, but her words also helped me gain control of my emotions. "Is someone helping him?""Not really. Killian works through these things in his own way and eventually he'll come to terms with he isn't infallible. Shit happens and it's not the end of the world."I needed to change the subject. Thinking of Killian alone in his large home, in pain,
I woke up Saturday morning with far more excitement than I'd felt in weeks. I'd been pushing myself harder than ever before. Middle-of-the-pack Cavanaugh was ready to move up a place or two. It felt good to know I had a shot of doing exactly that. It was a four-school track meet and I wanted to know if my preparations would pay off.The starting pistol sounded and the 10,000-meter race began. Within twenty steps I picked an inside line and held my ground. I established my place in the pack and stuck to it. My leg muscles were loose with my fingers lightly touching my palms. I looked ahead, focusing on my goal. I sank into my rhythm quicker than I'd ever done before and let the outside world drift away.At the halfway point, there were two distinct groups. I stayed slightly to the rear of the front one. More runners fell back as the race continued. Eventually, I felt the strain in my legs, but also their power. When the flag signaling the final four laps went up, I usually felt the we
I groaned and pulled the pillow over my head. My head hurt, my body hurt, but worst of all my pride was shattered.I was afraid to open my eyes and find Killian in my apartment. I didn't hear any noise, but continued to assess my surroundings for several more minutes. I finally removed the pillow and squinted into the daylight with one eye.My poor, pathetic head.My mouth tasted horrible and I thought I might be sick again. I scooted my legs around and slowly went to a sitting position.Two pills, a glass of water, and a note rested on the bedside table.Legs,Take the ibuprofen, shower, and eat something. Get some rest today. I'm picking you up for dinner at six.KOver my dead body. Killian MacGregor was not prancing back into my life.My head pounded dully, so I took the pills because I didn't really have a choice. I also spent an hour in the shower, which pissed me off more because it was exactly what the note told me to do. I managed to eat a piece of toast before
Monday morning Killian waited out front and followed me when I took off running. He didn't say anything, just kept pace. I kept him in my peripheral vision even if I didn't mean too. It was chilly and looked like rain was heading in.He stopped at the five-mile mark, slightly shorter than the distance he normally ran, and went back the way he came. I continued and finished my run before the rain began.Killian waited at my door.I looked at him. "Nothing's changed, Killian. This won't work."I watched him close his eyes for a moment before opening them and giving me the smallest hint of dimples."I won't give up, Rebecca, though I know I deserve everything you're putting me through."My rage kicked in. "You have no idea what you've put me through. How many tears I've cried or how many times I'd give anything to be in your arms one last time. I'm broken, Killian. You broke me. I don't want the pain that goes along with being your girlfriend."He leaned in and kissed me. No tongue
His home was exactly as I remembered. I tried to harden my heart, but when he led me immediately into his bedroom, his unique scent lingering in the air turned my belly to quivering jelly. Within a few seconds, panic set in. I put my hands out in front of me after he placed my bag on the floor."I'm sorry. I don't think I can do this. It hurts too much, Killian."He didn't move closer. "Talk to me, love."My voice rose slightly. "How can I? I shouldn't have come. I really can't handle you or your need to win. I'm not cut out to be part of your life."He spoke so softly. "I've changed."A burst of deriding laughter slipped past my lips. "No, you haven't, Killian. Winning to you is all-inclusive. You call it focus and I call it insanity. You play a game and the 'powers that be' pay you a lot of money. I get that. But- when it's all said and done, it's a game. Boys out on a field, pounding each other into the mud. A game."Killian's eyes went dark. "It's more than a game, Rebecca."
He washed me thoroughly in the shower. I tried to do it myself, but he removed the soap from my hands and cleaned every inch of my skin."You're punishing me." Sadness tinged my voice.Momentarily, his soapy hands stopped moving. "No, I'm giving you what you asked for.""Then you're punishing yourself."His gaze darkened. "But will it be enough, Rebecca? Can you forgive me? Will you love me again?"I pulled him into my arms. I could see the pain in his eyes and I was so afraid to tell him how much I loved him. I never stopped and didn't think I ever would. It was me-I was punishing both of us, but I couldn't stop. The weeks and months of pain made me into a person I didn't know. I wanted to wipe it all away, let my heart melt again, and most of all forgive him.Why was I doing this?My tears started and my shoulders began shaking."Shh, Rebecca, it's okay. I understand. I'll do whatever it takes. I'm not going anywhere and if I eventually get my way, you'll never go anywhere ag
After the completion of track season and my college graduation, I became Rebecca MacGregor. I qualified for nationals and took sixth place. No grumpy loser's behavior from me. I was thrilled with my achievement and very proud of myself.For the wedding, Amanda, Malory, and my sister Candi were my bridesmaids. My sister and I reached an uneasy peace that improved each time I confronted her and wouldn't let her talk down to me. Lyle, Blitz, and Stump stood with Killian. Michael was our ring bearer.For our honeymoon, we flew to a private island in the Caribbean that Killian rented.Exhaustion had settled deep into my bones by the time we arrived. Soft-colored lights surrounded the covered patio. Killian lifted me into his arms and carried me over the threshold. He started undressing me as soon as we were inside."I know you're tired, but I want you soaking in the Jacuzzi so you don't wake up sore from traveling." I love how he cared for me and how strong he made me feel. The built-
PART TWOMY AGENT, LARRY Modiess, looks up from the papers in his hand and quirks his lips. "It's a done deal, Jordansign, sealed, and delivered. You're officially a New Mexico Pronghorn, the team with the lousiest record in the pro league." His hand slams against my back. He looks like he wants to hug me, so I step back and try to act manly. He's four inches shorter than I am, balding, and outweighs me by a hundred pounds. Think big teddy bear with a backbone of steel when it comes to negotiating sports contracts.Larry's words culminate the longest journey of my lifecountless meetings and more sleepless nights than I care to count. The journey isn't over. There will be more rounds of meetings, situating myself with the team, and dealing with the media. I also need to inform my father that I'll be moving to New Mexico. We lost my mom two years ago and I've been living with him ever since. My plan is to convince him to move in with me in the near future. Doubtful he will but I'll try
I hid in Italy for three weeks. Greg came with me and kicked my ass on the court. He actually made a great practice partner. I was back to clean eating and drinking only water. It surprised me when Greg brought a bottle of wine to my room one night."What's this for?" I asked when he gave me one of his golly-gee smiles. Greg was cute. And, married to a lovely woman who worshipped him."I've been your coach for three months now and I have no idea what makes you tick. It's time for a come to daddy talk. Or in your case, come to coach. I figured the alcohol might make it easier.""You'll need more than one bottle," I told him. He came back to my room ten minutes later with two more bottles in his hands. "Does your wife know you're getting drunk with a slutty tennis star tonight?" I smiled to take the sting out of calling myself a slut."She suggested it. We've had many long conversations about you.""How romantic."He poured our first glasses and tilted the edge of his glass against
I never returned to the hospital, which was entirely unfair of me. My anger at my father carried over to Brack. I was horrible. The man I loved hadn't fully recovered and I left him at the hospital alone. Okay, he had his parents and his team. But, bottom lineI was horrible and a coward. I ignored the calls from Brack and my father. Again- coward.I needed complete control of my life. It took me two weeks to come up with a plan. During those two weeks, I hired a new coach and trained until I could barely walk. I trained with a purpose. I'd had my own money. Not just from tennis but from my mother. I'd never used it. That was the way I punished her and myself. Now, for the first time, I paid for my own coach.I liked him. I could actually smile over the fact that my father paid for Jerry all those years while the two of them hated each other. Greg, my new coach, kicked my ass. I had no idea if I had a chance this season. But, winning the Grand Slam was in my peripheral vision and not
Two days later, the doctors discontinued the medication that kept Brack in a coma. My father showed up the morning after surgery and made me go home, shower, and change clothes. Brack's parents were staying in shifts. His mom promised she wouldn't leave his side until I returned. I hadn't really spoken to them. We stayed relatively quiet in Brack's room. I whispered encouragement and told him I was there. They gave us privacy, too. That's when I told him I loved him. Again and again, I whispered the words.My father and Senator Jacobs were cordial. Brack's mother treated my dad like a family friend. Apparently she'd been friends with my mom. I tried not to think about the ramifications of our two families tied together through me and Brack. It was too much to take right now.Brack still had the ventilator. The doctor reviewed best and worst case scenarios with us. I refused to listen to brain damage, paralysis, learning to walk and talk again, and so on. My focus was full recovery. I
Four hours later, I was passed out against Mack's shoulder when his cell rang. My brain registered the noise and I was pulled quickly from sleep."Yeah," he answered quietly. He listened for several minutes before responding. "I have her here with me. We'll be there in a minute." He slid his phone back in his pocket and looked at me. "He's in recovery. It was touch and go, but he pulled through. They have him in a sedated coma. He has a stent in his skull to relieve swelling. The doctor told his parents he came to before surgery and demanded to see you. His mom wants you up there if you think you can handle it."I was up and walking out of the emergency room before he finished, my heart pounding a hundred miles an hour. "What floor? I'm not waiting for you to waddle behind me."Snickers came from several of the guys. "I've got her," Molly said."Second floor."The elevator took so long I almost turned to the stairs. I'd do anything to get to him. Brack asked for me and I had to se
I ran toward Brack, who had fallen to the floor. There was so much blood and I tried wiping it off his face. My hands turned dark red."You did it, baby," he whispered before his body went completely limp.Sander and a woman who must be Molly ran into the enclosure with guns drawn. I could barely hear them. Echoed gunshots continued ringing in my ears."Call an ambulance and please someone check on my father. He's in the van," I said as I held Brack's head in my lap. Blood soaked my panties and covered my legs. Head wounds bleed, I kept saying to myself. Sander practically jumped over us and went straight to Ty's body. He turned back when he had assured himself Ty was no longer a threat."Where were you?" I asked softly. I didn't want Brack to hear me yelling at his team.Sander sat down next to me and took Brack's arm checking his pulse. "The bastard used some kind of scrambler. It took us a while to figure out the van didn't leave the premises. We recovered the phones. Brack had
Kids laughed. A mother scolded a young child for attempting to go under the bar and get closer to one of the cages. Brack and I stood in the center of the primate exhibit. My phone chirped. It didn't startle me this time; I was too numb. "Yes.""Walk over to the primate exhibit sign and you'll find another cell phone behind it. Exchange it for the one you're using. Have Mr. Jacobs leave his phone behind, too."Brack followed me to the sign and I did exactly as told. The phone was there. I picked it up and lay mine down. "He said to leave yours, too." Brack took his from his jeans pocket and placed it beside mine. Thankfully, no one paid attention to us. I had no idea what we needed to do next. The phone in my hand vibrated. This time I clicked the call button without saying a word."Go to your left and keep walking on the path. Did you bring my present?" I carried a bag with the dress inside so both of Brack's arms would be free. He carried a gun in a hidden leg holster."Yes, it's
The inside of my father's home was a crime scene. We sat on the couch in the front room away from the forensic team that arrived a few minutes before. The media camped at the gates added to the growing chaos.Even knowing Ty would eventually call, I jumped when my cell phone chirped. The display read "Unknown." My fingers trembled as I picked it up and answered, "Hello, Ty, or should I call you Leo?"His husky laugh sent goose bumps across my arms. "I told you not to call the police. You wouldn't listen and you'll pay for disobedience."My voice remained steady. "It wasn't me. You killed your mother, so what exactly did you expect? She worked for my dad for over thirty years. One plus one equals two, Leo." Fuller and Brack told me not to push him too hard. I had to make him believe I hadn't gone to the police, though."My mother had cancer and it was eating away at her. I did her a favor. She didn't walk in God's light. By making her repent and then killing her God may show mercy."
My heart stopped. Dread and terror filled me. Colors danced before my eyes making it hard to see. The whoosh of blood traveling into my head made it hard to hear. I had to get control of myself. I gulped in air. "You goddamn son of a bitch. If you hurt my father I'll kill you.""He that blasphemeth the name of the LORD shall be put to death and stoned. Remember that when you feel the pain of my hand, Olivia."Brack startled me by gathering me close and placing his head against mine so we both listened. "Where's my father?" I demanded."That's better. I have instructions for you, Olivia. You will follow them to the letter. Please bring that man with you. The one you've been with lately." His voice took on an eerie quality. "If a man commits adultery with another man's wife, both the man and the woman must be put to death." He breathed heavily and then gave a sadistic laugh. "You may choose your father or lover to pay for your sins. One shall die and the other walks away.""But-"He
I don't know what I expected love to be like. Violins playing, little cupids flying around with bow and arrows, hell maybe just cuddles in bed for hours. That wasn't what happened the following morning. Brack paced across the carpet of my living room with his cell to his ear listening to one of his men on the other end. He cast a glance or two my way. I could tell before the call ended that he would try his non-communication shit with me again.I was right."What's the news?" I asked the second he lowered the phone.He came over and sat beside me. "Nothing to worry about."I gave him my I'm-about-to-slam-you-with-a-tennis-racquet look. "Bullshit." I was beginning to notice his tells. The fingers traveling through his hair was a sign that he didn't want to enlighten me. I waited.He breathed out a slow and steady breath of air. "Mack didn't see his attacker, but he heard him before he lost consciousness."My heartbeat accelerated. "Okay. Spill it.""Mack told Herman that most of