I didn’t know how long I slept or how I got home. But when I opened my eyes, it was already morning. I realized I wasn’t lying down on the ground by the beach where I last remembered I was. Instead, a down feather duvet kept me warm as I lay comfortably on a firm mattress. The pillows, duvet, and bed covers were all white, matching the eggshell paint on the walls.At first, I thought I was in a hospital, but then I realized the bed I was in was far too comfortable and a lot wider than a hospital bed. Something about the room I was in was very familiar, as if I’ve been here plenty of times before.The next thing I realized was that I was completely naked under the sheets. I felt tired, as though I went through a rigid exercise regimen the night before. Apart from that, I was feeling a little sore there, too, in my most private part. Shit!Suddenly, I felt movement behind me. An arm draped over my waist and I felt warm kisses on my neck.I panicked!I was with a guy! I was naked! We ha
Six months later, I graduated from the culinary school and became Austin’s sous-chef. I was getting excellent training from him, and the great thing about that was I didn’t feel like I was working at all. Every day was an adventure for me. Every moment was like play time. I was inventing my own fusions and Austin had considered including them in his official menu. Nick comes to New York at least three times a month. Whenever he had the chance to get away from work, he would come to me. And every time I spent with him was pure bliss, pure treasure. I have never been happier in my life. My happiness didn’t come without a price. I thought now that everything was going quite well in my life, I should let go of all the pain and anger I may still be harboring. There would no happiness without forgiveness, without healing. And to start with that, I forgave my father. The day after my graduation, I flew back to Salt Lake City to visit his grave. Nick went with me. I stared at the words on
I was never late… until now…Tonight, I am going to kill Nicholas Atkins!I drove to the diner. I really didn’t want Margaret and the rest of the people there to witness what I was going to do. They loved Nicholas and it would break their hearts. But I would rather he was at the diner than in the other side of town. I’d never get out of there alive if I hurt a hair on Nicholas’ body. Those kids would kill for him.When I reached the diner, I finally found him having coffee and a good laugh with Margaret and Grandpa Chef.When Margaret saw me coming, she smiled widely. “Ken, dear. How lovely to see you!”I forced a smile to my face. When Nicholas saw me, his face lit up.“Hi!” His smile was warm and genuine.I found three pairs of smiling eyes looking at me. I lost the heart to greet Nicholas with a power punch.“C-can we step outside? I need to talk to you,” I said. My voice was grave, laced with warning. I was sure Nicholas didn’t miss it.“Okay,” he said. I turned around toward the
I tried to make sense of Bailey’s words, but then I reminded myself that I don’t really give a fuck about what people think. Except for Jen, I don’t think I really care about anyone. I don’t even know what’s so special about her. People come and go but I don’t know why I stayed with her when I fucking pushed everyone away. Maybe it is her fragility. Her state of unspoken weakness that makes me feel needed. Or maybe because she is the only thing that reminds me of the warmth and love of the family I once had. I looked up at Bailey and gave him a frown. “Just because I’m more creative than others in the manner that I dress… or that I don’t let guys spin my head with their bull flatteries… doesn’t mean I’m gay, right?” Jen and I have been best friends since high school. When I came to town to live with my father, after my mother and her life partner died in a car crash, Jen was the first friend I had. She accepted me for who I am—with all my quirks and weirdn
At that moment, I was already planning a strategy on how best to kick the guy in the gutter so he’d leave for good. My thoughts were interrupted by a gentle pat on my shoulder.“I told you, you could pull it off,” Bailey said, his expression obviously delighted because of the crowd’s reaction.“I never really sang for a crowd before. But thanks for making me do it.”Although I was not particularly excited about meeting Jen’s new friend, something told me that I have to keep an eye on this one. I didn’t want some douchebag playing with her emotions. And my douchebag alarm was ringing all over the place with this new guy hanging out with her.Jen was looking at this guy with stars in her eyes. I swore that must have been how Juliet was whenever she looked at Romeo. Silly and stupid! No wonder Shakespeare decided to kill them off.I replaced Brett behind the drums for the next song. I played with all the God-given talents I have. Bailey didn’t ask for it, but toward the end of the song
I was about to retort with something nasty, but Brett called me from the stage.“Ey, Ken! We’re up!”I turned back to Nicholas and gave him a scowl. “We are not yet through!” I said in the gravest tone I could manage.Instead of being offended, threatened, or intimidated, Nicholas gave me a contended smile. In a voice barely hiding his amusement, he said, “Oh, I’m actually counting on that!”I was scowling as I took my seat in front of the drums.“Bad mood, eh? Don’t let him get through to you. Don’t let him linger in your thoughts too much,” Brett said.I raised a brow. “What do you mean?”“That is Nick Atkins. Every guy in this town wanted to be him. Every girl wanted to date him,” he replied before going backstage.I glanced over at their table again. Jen had returned to her seat and was giggling at something that Nicholas said.As I twirled the sticks around my fingers and hit the snare, I thought, No. Not every girl in this town would want to date you. I promise you that!***“Sp
“Uhm, I don’t know where to go from here,” Nicholas said as we reached Jen’s neighborhood.“I thought you were a boy scout. You found my house,” I said.He looked at me from the corner of his eye for a second, and then he looked back on the road. “Your father is a prominent man. Your house is the biggest on the block. Everybody in this town knows where you live.” He stopped on the side of the road. “Now, which way?”I gave him directions. By the time we arrived at Jen’s house, we were officially thirty minutes late. I felt bad for making her wait but smiled to myself for a mission accomplished. Jen was going to freak out and be mad at him! And I’d be around to watch. For a moment, it would provide entertainment, enough to make me forget about the foul terminologies my father chose to use on me.Jen was already pacing in front of her gate. I had to bite my lip to keep from smiling.Good luck, Nicky! This is very impressive!“I’m sorry, we’re late. I found it difficult to find your hous
“Excuse me, why are we here?” I demanded.He simply shrugged. “Well, we already passed your house. You didn’t even notice.”“And you just decided to take me somewhere else?” I asked angrily. “What is wrong with you?”“I saw your father standing in front of your house, sending off some his friends. I just thought you wouldn’t want to have another encounter with him. Figured you can use some time off from him?”He was right. I would not want to face my father again. But that does not mean I want to be alone with him!“We’re not friends, Atkins! Why do you think I needed help from you?”Nicholas stared at me for a moment and then he nodded. He straightened up on his seat and started his engine.“Alright, whatever you say, princess,” he murmured.“Stop!” The tone of my voice made him stop on his tracks. He turned around raising a brow at me.“Don’t call me that ever again!” I snapped. Then I turned away from him. “And… yeah, maybe I can stand sitting here next to you for another ten minut
Six months later, I graduated from the culinary school and became Austin’s sous-chef. I was getting excellent training from him, and the great thing about that was I didn’t feel like I was working at all. Every day was an adventure for me. Every moment was like play time. I was inventing my own fusions and Austin had considered including them in his official menu. Nick comes to New York at least three times a month. Whenever he had the chance to get away from work, he would come to me. And every time I spent with him was pure bliss, pure treasure. I have never been happier in my life. My happiness didn’t come without a price. I thought now that everything was going quite well in my life, I should let go of all the pain and anger I may still be harboring. There would no happiness without forgiveness, without healing. And to start with that, I forgave my father. The day after my graduation, I flew back to Salt Lake City to visit his grave. Nick went with me. I stared at the words on
I didn’t know how long I slept or how I got home. But when I opened my eyes, it was already morning. I realized I wasn’t lying down on the ground by the beach where I last remembered I was. Instead, a down feather duvet kept me warm as I lay comfortably on a firm mattress. The pillows, duvet, and bed covers were all white, matching the eggshell paint on the walls.At first, I thought I was in a hospital, but then I realized the bed I was in was far too comfortable and a lot wider than a hospital bed. Something about the room I was in was very familiar, as if I’ve been here plenty of times before.The next thing I realized was that I was completely naked under the sheets. I felt tired, as though I went through a rigid exercise regimen the night before. Apart from that, I was feeling a little sore there, too, in my most private part. Shit!Suddenly, I felt movement behind me. An arm draped over my waist and I felt warm kisses on my neck.I panicked!I was with a guy! I was naked! We ha
Ken“Ma’am, are you okay? Ma’am, can you hear me?”“Should we call the police?”I slowly opened my eyes and found the girl in Margaret’s diner and another guy looking at me with worried expressions on their faces. I looked around. I realized I was seated in the driver’s seat of my car, with the seat inclined. The girl was sitting on the passenger seat, holding up a small bottle of mint balm and the guy was kneeling by my car door.“What happened?” I asked, sitting up.“You fainted,” the guy said to me. “You’re lucky I was passing by when you dropped your phone and passed out. I caught you before you could hit your head. I called for help. Are you okay?”I nodded. “Th—thanks.”“Do you want to go to the hospital?” the girl asked.I shook my head. “I’ll be… I’ll be okay.”“Well, I found these on the ground,” the guy said. He handed me the pieces of my phone. “I think you’re gonna need to buy a new one.”He was right. The phone was broken that I doubt any service center could still put it
Nick.I wasn’t able to react immediately. I took a couple of hits before I came to my senses and docked and thwarted all her assaults. It took a while to convince her that maybe she was just late. I offered to get her a pregnancy kit just so she could be sure.I waited days for her to tell me that the tests came back negative, as I was sure they would be. I was positive I never touched her. How could I? I spent most of the night staring at her, watching her sleep. I was in love with her. When I do make love to her, I want her to want it, too. I wanted her to remember me. I wanted to be different from the others she had been with.I called her several times, but she was completely ignoring me. I was beginning to get worried. I realized, too, that since I backed out on my deal with her father, he would no doubt employ somebody else to charm her, woo her. Try to succeed where I failed. Well, I haven’t failed yet. In fact, I was only just starting. There were some things that I wanted to
Nick.I went inside the Rhythemes. This was new. The last time I was in town, this joint wasn’t here, not that it would make much of a difference to me anyway. I was not the type to frequent bars or go to one out of boredom. I didn’t fancy sitting at the bar, watching sex-hungry predators pick up their latest clueless prey.I would rather go to a card house. At least there, I could exercise my brains and make money out of it. No, I’m not a gambling addict. I just happened to be gifted at it. Am I counting cards? Well, where was the fun if you use mathematical equations and probabilities? But desperate times call for desperate measures.When I came back to the States, I had no family left to go to. My father was gone, leaving me with the only property he could afford. The house he left behind was too shabby and major repairs had to be done. I didn’t have enough money to build my dream house. But I couldn’t leave my father’s legacy looking like a shithole. I did what I had to do. In a y
“So, how are you doing?” I asked Brett when he visited me in New York. We were up having beer on the rooftop.“I’m fine,” he said, but his tone was not so convincing. I raised a brow at him. “By that, I mean I’m surviving information overload, trial by fire, meeting up with more people in a month than I ever did in my entire life, and trying to become the great Robert Clarke in approximately two hundred and fifty-five days. I’m losing my bachelor years too fast, but yeah, I’m all right.”I reached out and squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry. It could have been me, you know.”He nodded. “Yeah. You could have been in my shoes. But the thing is, I never dreamed of becoming a chef. I’ve always wanted to be a businessman. I can’t force this fate on you, too. It’s just things are happening too fast, too soon.”“Don’t worry, Brett. You’ll do great. Soon, you’ll be in Forbes magazine as one of the youngest, most successful CEOs in the country. It’s written in your stars. You were brilliant in schoo
Kitten,It had been six months, ten days, three hours and thirty-three minutes. I’m still waiting. Told you I would. Although I hope you never get tired of reading my letters. I will never get tired of writing them—until my last breath, remember?Brett wouldn’t tell me where you are but assured me you were okay. Right now, there is nothing more I wanted to do but to come to you. Nope, I won’t even hug you if you don’t want me to. I just want to make sure you’re okay, make you feel that everything is going to be all right. You’re not alone. You will never be.I love you, kitten.Tears were rolling down my cheeks when I read Nick’s latest letter. Brett comes to New York to check up on me once a month. He brought a bunch of letters and trinkets from Nick since he didn’t know about my new address.Nick was true to his word. He would not stop writing to me. He already said he was sorry. He gave me all the explanations in the world. He’d given me time to process and find it in my heart to
After that, everything was a blur. I felt as if I was floating like a zombie the past few days. I didn’t get much sleep, and it was as if I had matured ten years in a span of ten days. I suddenly needed to handle adult stuff that I wasn’t ready for: meeting with the police, talking to lawyers, and handling a funeral.Things happened quickly. And since an investigation was ongoing, and my father’s company was publicly listed, news of his death would hurt the company and, according to my uncle, my inheritance. He chose to have everything hushed. The funeral was opened only to blood relatives and there was no coverage on the media about it. We were also instructed not to talk to anybody without consulting with our lawyers first.The worst part of it all, I couldn’t talk to anyone about how I was feeling. No matter how bad my relationship with my father was, no matter what a madman I thought he was, he was still my father. And it was never easy losing a parent. Up until now, a part of me
I wish I could say that I was back in Nick’s house and in his life after twenty-four hours. I wish I could say we were back in each other’s arms within a week and that he proposed to me a month after. I wish I didn’t leave, and my life would have been a complete bliss. Nick would have taken care of me and we would have lived a simple but happy life. That would have been how I wanted my story with Nick to end.But life wasn’t always that simple, and it certainly was never easy. And just when you thought you got it all figured out, life throws you out of balance again.Two months. Twenty-eight days. Fourteen hours. Twenty-five minutes.That was how long it had been since I left Nick’s house. That was how long since I last saw him, since I last had a conversation with him.He calls. Every day. Sometimes more than once a day. He also sends me text messages at least three times a day: to say good morning, to remind me about lunch, and then to say good night.He writes, too. The longhand l