SIXTEEN
‘’ Don’t move,’’ he says.
Hearing that voice makes me automatically move and turn around. ‘’What the fuck!’’
He lowers his eyes and puts his knife back in his boots. I also return mine to my belt holder and veil it with my shirt then pick my food from the ground.
‘’ Dwayne, why are you following me?’’
Now, he readjusts his stance. ‘’This is not the way back to the house.’’
‘’ What?’’ I ask, blinking rapidly. ‘’ I am not allowed to have a personal business?’’
Dwayne scoffs. "I really don't understand the game you are playing, Imani. If that's even your name, but whatever you do, do not touch Zuri."
I roll my eyes with my head. " You have said that be
"Everything around me burns, everyone around me burns. I'm just trying to save myself." -Jumbo I am used to the four walls of this place. The four corners surrounding me are just white like they want to conform my sanity to be nothing but a plain white paper. It is not yet time. I hear no screams of anguish. I hear nothing. It is almost like if I find a way to break free, the halls would be empty. But I know better. I can not say accurately what lies in the hallway or how many people are out there and what sort of weapons they carry. I know there are plenty of men and there are girls like me waiting for their fate in these small cubicles. Okay, maybe they're not like me.
Looking at these sugar glazed donuts should make me throw up. This woman feeds me like a rat.I was slapped awake in this room that has a little warmth. Even after I opened my eyes, trying to adjust to this place, I was slapped again. Hard whack across my face that made me pass out. Again.She wants to kill me. She wants to end my existence but she chose slow torture for me. I have never been afraid of death but I am afraid of this door opening to reveal that woman whose face was like a sculpture in an art museum; devoid of emotions.I have lost track of time. This is the fourth day I have not been slapped into oblivion or been sedated. There are iron bars she constructed on the door. I was half awake the day she did it. It was after that she gave me more injections.This place feels like a higher level of the place I was held before. I seem to have been promoted to a diff
Two•See how the world is moving on like there are no captives somewhere, people about facing their deaths or worse.I have come to realize that death is fair. It is easy. I used to be ready for anything but inbetween living and anything, there is torture; it is a different form of death.There are bars at my window positioned with close grid spaces. It's where I look out from almost all day. That odd woman has seen me severally sitting on the bed and looking out but she says nothing. She does not seem to mind just like she doesn't mind if I stay in the dark or if I live.There is a woman who sells humongous fishes, another man sells patterned materials on a table beside her. Two boys hawk essential oils but they are also pick pockets. I have seen only two cars here. They were actually delivery trucks. The major means of transport in this area are bicycles and motorbikes. This seems to be the hi
THREEToday I let myself remember. I let my thoughts wander overboard beyond cliffs where I have trained it not to wander. Today I think of my mother.African she is. She still maintains the heritage and packs up her kinky hair or she braids it. Some days, she combs it and the fullness makes her face appear smaller, younger, Wilder. She also had beautiful dark skin and the body of one even younger than me.Kent once described me as chocolate smeared with caramel pudding. If he meant that I am the complexion of none but both, then I accept that description.My hair was formally straightened for a fluid flow with the comb but now it seems to have returned to its natural state. Just as I was once chubby but this past month or months has reshaped me. Yet my face is not wild like my mother's. Many times it has been called innocent with a touch of mischief and that's all.I do not know
FOURSometimes you hear the sound of silence. It sounds like danger hiding as safety. The camouflaging danger will speak to you in the silence that disturbs your peace but you would not hear.But I did.Beneath silence is chaos - an uprising rage inside of me. I can feel it, I can almost see it. The discomfort, the sudden irrationality.When that irrationality engulfed me, I walked towards the window and looked down. It could have been late hours of the morning. The woman who sits at the window in the building opposite mine is there looking out. I can not make out her face but as always, she seems hopeless.I walk to the door and try the handle even though I had heard her lock it severally. The door parts at just the first pull. An alien rage fills me and I throw back my head in laughter. I carry a stuffed doll for weapons. I did not know how to wield them but it assured me a lit
FIVEThis city never sleeps. I can relate to its insomnia because I am still awake past midnight. Everyone is still out here chasing dreams or running from nightmares. I still feel like a close look at me would give me away - that I don't belong to this free world, that this level of owning myself is new to me. But for now, I'm not dodging in between buildings. I am like a traveler attempting to inconspicuously pass through a strange land.I found an empty room in another ancient building on the next street. I was there before some people began to flood inside like it was their home. Well, it is. One woman approached me with two kids. ‘’ my children sleep here’’ she said. From the dirty oversized slippers that adorned her feet, I let my eyes run to her forehead then I grudgingly rise to my feet.Now I am standing at the door as a guard watching them sleep. I do not know if it is
SIXEveryday is a war. If you survive today. Go back and get stronger. - JumboI have passed by this lantern shop two times now. I'm not foolish to try to steal from them; I want to work here. There is no hanging placard that says they need a sales assistant or someone like me but I keep my hopes up as I wander around the small shop.The clothes on me I bought with my money- I did not steal them. This gives a different air of confidence as I walk into the lantern store. Two customers are in the shop, checking out lanterns set on a table without being properly arranged. It seems the seller was too careless to care about the presentation.A young girl is at the counter. She has her chin in her hand while looking at the customers. I approach the counter. ‘’Hey, I want to speak with the manager.’’‘’You are already doing that.’&
SEVENCross Legged I stand outside the lantern shop. I do not know if I am too early or too late. Many people pass by. They throw a quick glance at the shop and pass. If the owner of the shop has changed her mind about hiring me, I would try again tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.Working in this place could be a foolish decision. It is. But there is something about this place that has pulled me in and kept me amidst the dangers involved.My eyes move around the environment brightly illuminated with solar lights, then I move my butt to the floor close to the entrance of the shop. The locks are simple; just a padlock which an iron rod or stone can break apart.Soon, I see her approaching. She is no longer putting on what she was putting on at noon. Then she wore a blue jean with white shirt and a hat. Now she is in trousers with a see through net shirt that reveals her whi