Has it ever occurred to you that a few words could seal your fate?
I know it seems ridiculous, but for me… they did.
Seven fucking words sealed my fate in my new high school. I didn’t know how to break the curse that came upon me, or if it was possible to be free of it at all. I wished I’d just listened to Talia that day and looked away. But I didn’t.
My decision turned three years of my life upside down, and as much as I wished I could reverse it, I couldn’t. I regretted my action.
But the thing about regret is… it’s a fucking waste of time.
*********************
“It’s going to be fine, Ida,” Dad said softly.
As CEO of Arne Enterprises, Isaac Arne had a reputation to uphold. But this tone of voice was one he saved just for me, in the comfort of home. He was a wealthy man who gave me and my twin brother, Jack, anything we ever asked for. So did our mother… when she was still alive.
“I didn’t say anything.” Which was true. I technically didn’t say anything, but I knew my face said a lot I couldn’t control.
I’m Cressida Arne, Ida for short. Today was going to be my first day at my new school. Dad had recently decided to move us back from London to the place where Jack and I were born.
Atherton Town.
A shiver ran down my spine every time the name was mentioned.
As beautiful as it was, I didn’t like this place because… because I don’t know why.
If we’re talking facts, I couldn’t remember anything about my younger self. I had no memory of anything that happened before my ninth birthday. Everyone said I suffered some sort of memory loss when I was younger, but no one knew why.
I shouldn’t feel anything towards this place that I didn’t remember, but my mind kept making me have some sort of fear, or maybe discomfort. I wasn’t sure what the feeling was, but it was definitely there.
A building that was on its own and far away from the neighbourhood caught my attention…
No! Let me go. Dad! Dad, help me!
“Cressida?” My head snapped in Dad’s direction. He was holding my water bottle in his hand, his eyes drifting to my left side. I realised I was clutching it tightly, and he thought my kidney was hurting… again.
“I’m okay,” I declared. I took the bottle from his hand but didn’t drink.
As if the memory loss wasn’t enough, I had kidney cancer when I was seven or eight, which resulted in me having one kidney. It now controlled almost everything in my life.
No drinking. No smoking. No to some kinds of foods because they might cause damage to my kidney. Small amounts of exercise, but not too much.
All of that was told to me, of course, because I remembered none of it.
We reached the school where I was supposed to be studying for the next three years.
MoonFlow School.
It was the one school where you’d find the children of the wealthiest families around here. As well as that, every student had to sit an entrance exam to be accepted. Luckily for me, I had a wealthy family and intelligence on my side. Jack did too, but he had decided to stay in London with Aunt Valerie, while Dad and I moved back to Atherton, near Aunt Natalie.
We reached the entrance of the school and boy, was it one hell of a school. The building was more like a castle–a very huge castle. Four towers were around each end, and if I was going to take a lucky guess, I think they were a signal to where each year level was supposed to go.
Freshman. Sophomore. Junior. Senior.
And I had to go to each one of them for the next four years without Jack. How was I supposed to stay four years without my twin, who has been with me forever?
“Ready?” Dad asked. I only nodded my head and exited the car. As we waited for the gate to open, I observed the pretty and colourful flowers and gardens that surround the place.
“Alright, Ida. I have to go talk to the principal and you have to go in there. I’m sure you’ll find your way because you don't need my help, I suppose.” I only gave him a sarcastic smile while he let out a chuckle.
It was moments like these where I wished that Dad was free every day so we could be happy like that. Especially as he’d just repeated the words I said to him every time I wanted to go explore a new place.
“But remember you have to–” I cut him off immediately to continue his sentence that he said to me every single day.
“Stay hydrated, don’t eat protein, don’t forget your blood pressure pills and don’t forget to eat your snacks. How did I do?” He smiled at me and kissed my forehead. As the gates opened, he walked to the left side as I walked to the right.
“You got this, Cressida!” Dad half yelled at me. I shook my head at him, but not before smiling at him one last time.
Dad is right, I got this. I think.
I walked slowly towards the freshman building, not caring if I missed the first class. I’m not supposed to run outside of exercising because of the solitary kidney of mine.
“Cressida? Ida?” I heard someone call my name, and I turned around. Coming towards me was a red-haired girl. Her skin was so white, as if she had never walked under the sun. Her eyes were a calm shade of hazel, which was very beautiful.
She was wearing what I suppose was a part of the uniform. It was a dark green jacket with a white shirt under it, and a black skirt. I hoped I wouldn’t have to wear a skirt. Not that I don’t like them, but I feel that they are more suited to parties, not school.
I took a few steps in her direction. “Do we know each other?” I asked. It surprised me that she knew who I was and even called me by my nickname.
“Yes we–the memory loss thing, I forgot. I’m Talia Bernard. I was your best friend when you used to live here.” She said the last part in excitement that I wished I could share.
Dad had always changed the subject whenever I asked him to tell me about my time at Atherton. Then boom, out of nowhere, let’s go back to Atherton, Ida.
No, not suspicious at all, Dad.
“We… were?” I asked, stepping closer to her as if I felt an instant connection with her. And maybe I did. Who knows how fucked up my brain was.
“Yeah. Inseparable, you could say. With Jack, of course. God, I miss those dimples, he was so cute when we were kids.” She even knew Jack? Just how much did I forget?
Maybe I should ask for a photo from Talia. I mean, if we were childhood friends, maybe we had some photos together. For now, I guess I’ll stick with her because, for the first time in my life, I felt lost.
Or maybe it was the creeps that I had from this place that made me feel lost. But either way, I needed someone with me.
“Do you have any photos of us?” But I quickly blurted after so I wouldn’t appear suspicious. “Because I couldn't find anything in our house in London.”
Talia only smiled in excitement before she pulled her phone out and came to stand beside me. On the screen was a photo of three children, and I saw Dad and… Mom. She was smiling in the background, with whom I assumed were Talia’s parents, while Talia, Jack, and I were smiling at one another.
“That was taken by your Aunt Natalie when we went skiing for the first time. As usual, you volunteered to be the first person to ski because Jack is… you know, and I was mostly cowardice because I didn’t like snow that much.”
Talia sounded so happy talking about it. We looked like we were happy at that time. In the photo, Dad and Mom looked relaxed. And believe me when I say that they were–and maybe my dad still was–paranoid.
So Talia and her parents must have been trustworthy for Dad to let Jack and me befriend her, and for my parents to befriend hers.
“Wow, it looks like I forgot a lot,” I said, mostly to myself. Talia only smiled sadly at me before intertwining our elbows, then started walking towards the building as if she knew the way.
“You seem to know your way around here, Talia.”
“I do. My cousin used to study here, so I already know this place.” That made sense.
We walked through the hallways of the freshman side of the school, where we kept on talking about how excited Talia was to be a freshman. I was too, but having to love this experience without Jack just felt so wrong.
We’d done everything together our whole lives. To become a freshman without him wasn’t something I was looking forward to, but something I had to endure for the next four years. I’d just have to deal with it.
I stopped to drink some water, when I noticed how silent it had gotten. I gulped the water when I realised I forgot to swallow, then looked at Talia to find her staring at someone ahead of us. I followed her gaze to find her looking at four boys, who I figured were the reason behind the sudden silence.
Her gaze was directed at one of them, who had brown hair and chilly grey eyes. He was definitely in the gym twenty-four seven because of his muscled body.
I nudged her and asked, “The hell is happening?”
She broke eye contact, then looked back at me and I saw how haunted her eyes were. All of that was because of Mister Muscle Tank over there. Why?
“They are the stars of the show around here. Sons of the wealthiest and strongest families in Atherton.”
She started counting them one by one as they appeared.
“Oliver Earhart.” The one she was looking at before.
“Jesper Varon.” Jesper wasn't as muscled as Oliver, but he was definitely something as well. His hair was black, while his eyes were brown with a little green in them.
“Ace Brando.” Ace had clean, blonde hair and blue eyes. They were all wearing the uniform in a messy way, except for one who didn't bother to wear anything but the jacket.
“And the king of not only them, but everyone else around here. Savaş Ewald.” The moment Talia said his name, my brain seemed to zone out.
Savaş, are you okay?
Don’t touch him.
“Ida, you okay?” Talia’s voice snapped me out of… what was I thinking about again?
I turned to her and said, “Yeah, I’m fine. But isn’t his first name Turkish?”
She nodded her head. “Yep, his mother was Turkish, and she was the one to name him.”
“Was?”
“She passed away around the same time your mother did.” Should I consider that coincidence or weird?
I didn’t have much time to think, because when I turned to look back at him, I found his green eyes already on me, watching me like an eagle.
He seemed…. familiar. Too familiar, as if I knew him before.
His green eyes seemed familiar. His dirty blonde hair looked familiar. He had a light beard and a jawline that appeared to be perfection.
“Look away, Ida. Believe me when I say you don’t want to have Savaş Ewald’s attention,” Talia said with a little tremble in her voice.
“Why is that?” I asked. I wanted to look away, but it was as if my brain wouldn’t let me. I couldn’t look away from those green eyes.
“Because the last girl who had his attention ended up dead.” My eyes widened, and this time, it was easy for me to turn my attention away from him so I could look at Talia.
“What?” She didn’t have time to answer, because Savaş shouted so that everyone around us could hear.
“Welcome!” He opened his arms wide as he looked at me, but he wasn't smiling normally. No. He was sporting a dark smirk that made a chill of fear run down my spine.
“Welcome to your living hell, Cressida Arne!”
CressidaThree Years LaterJack answered the phone with a chuckle. “Miss me already?” Hearing his chuckle was more than enough to make my day.“Bitching already?” I faked a gasp as I stopped at the traffic light and adjusted the Bluetooth ear piece. “Stop being a little shit. Why are you calling?” “I missed you. I know you left London a week ago, but I would miss you even if you left two seconds ago.” He paused, and I knew there was more, so I clutched the steering wheel tightly so I could hide my sadness and frustration about not being beside him when he needed me the most.“If it wasn’t for Aunt Valerie here, I wouldn’t have survived my seizures without having you beside me. But it’s fine… one year to go.” One more year in that hell I’d been living in for the past three years. The same hell Talia endured with me. And thank God she was with me, because I doubt I would’ve survived without her. Who would survive what we had to go through on their own? No one.“One year to go.” My vo
CressidaThe tension in the classroom didn’t seem to lessen with time. Everyone was whispering about how Savaş chose me over Blake. It felt wrong, but somehow right at the same time.I ignored him for the rest of the class and even after it ended. I could feel his eyes on me constantly, but I simply kept on ignoring. No one called me or Talia any names as we walked through the hallways of the school to our lockers. Not one bad word got directed at us. I had to double check to see if Savaş or any of the horsemen were behind us because it would’ve been the only explanation after what happened today.Savaş insulted Blake in front of everyone, for my sake. Not that I believe he actually helped me for… well, me. There has to be a reason behind that action of his, because there is no way that he just turned into a good person towards us. Not after all this time.But I wasn’t sure what to feel about this whole thing. I had hated Savaş for a very long time… and I still do, but why exactly di
Cressida Usually In a situation like this my brain goes into a fight or flight mode but I couldn't do either of those. Savaş took both options off the table as he had me trapped against my own car, I couldn't fight, hell I could barely breathe with this position we're in and flight was also out of question. So what the fuck was I supposed to do? He finally removed his hand from my mouth and I didn’t waste my chance to ask any question that came to my mind."What are you talking about?" I asked and had to use all my strength so that my voice wouldn't tremble because I was afraid but that wasn't all, there was something else going on with me because of this situation and I didn’t like it."I don't appreciate it when people pretend that I don't exist, Arne and you of all people don't get to do that." His voice was so low and dangerous that it should have me running the other way as quickly as I could but it felt like I was paralysed. "I didn't do anything to you!" I yelled at him, no
Cressida Why am I even searching about this? Right, because I wanted to know more about Savaş Ewald.Turns out his name means 'War' which suited him greatly.Meanwhile I finally knew what the word he always says to me means. Güzel is a Turkish word that means beautiful but why does he call me that? I mean does he really think I'm beautiful or is he just being flirty? Why the hell would I care if he thought I'm beautiful? I know I am!!Damn it… he's occupying without even being around so how the hell am I supposed to face him tomorrow after what happened today's afternoon in the parking lot, where anyone could have seen us. Shit! I'm only now thinking about that? Why didn't I remember this info when we were in the parking lot? Because I'm an Idiot! A knock on my bedroom door had me sitting up in the bed but no one entered the room which meant it's Dad."Ida? Talia is here, she wants me to see if you're awake." "Yes I'm awake!" I yelled but made no attempt to get up and open the d
Cressida "So he's not taking you out for dinner but to a party and he's inviting me too?" Talia was surprising me, seriously. She was freaking out ever since she heard that Savaş is taking us to a party and I couldn't say anything to him because he had me in his grip by Talia and worse thing about it… is that Talia was happy because someone started to see her as a normal human from the horsemen.So I agreed and told him that I need to get dressed which brought us to now. We were looking for some good party dresses in my closet and we were about the same size already so we wore each other's clothes all the time."How about this one for you?" Talia held out a red halter tight dress with an open bodice that was closed a little but with ties and holy shit it looked hot which meant I should wear it, just to spite that bastard. "Fuck yeah!" I told her as I went to wear it while she found herself a golden glittery dress then she immediately threw a pair of heels at me. They were Silver c
Cressida Neither Of us said a word to one another as Savaş returned to driving to the party.I mean… I don't know what to say. This was so fucking missed up, the whole idea of me and this man in one place is one thing but him taking ownership of me as if I was some kind of object is a whole other thing.And the whole him being my father's enemy's son didn't leave my mind as well because it made me feel like everyone knew everything about my life but my own self and worse is that they refuse to tell me anything. Why are they doing this to me? Do I really look too weak in their eyes to the point where they think I couldn't handle a single truth and if only I was asking for too much, all I'm asking for is my life… the one that I forgot.It's not like I chose to forget everything."You're not going to tell me anything about my past are you? If you know about it." I whispered and for a moment I would think he didn't hear it but the silence in the car was begging to be filled with any sou
Cressida A month and a few weeks passed by and to my surprise, Savaş never bothered me face to face this whole time as if he was really giving me time to make my decision.But I couldn't exactly say that he was decent either because of the texts I kept on receiving from him or more like smutty and dirty texts.And it seemed like he picked all the wrong times to send them, sometimes when I'm eating breakfast, lunch or dinner with Dad and aunt who by the way were pretty much still pissed at me for not telling them that Savaş was my boyfriend. Boyfriend my ass.Anyway and sometimes he would send me those texts when I'm literally in class or talking with a teacher. Savaş Ewald knew no limits which made my case all worse and if only I could at least brainstorm with Talia but I didn't tell her about the whole Savaş 'Rules' or mention anything about my past at all because I knew she would've told Dad and I don't need that, not right now.I was now in the car with Dad and Aunt because even a
Cressida "Oh this one is awesome!" Jack and I said in union as 'Astronaut in the Ocean' by Masked Wolf started playing on the car radio while we started vibing with the song but my brain kept wandering to how was I supposed to cope with Savaş's 'Rules' I mean I still didn't talk to him about me accepting his deal but I sent him a message that we needed to talk but didn't give anymore info but I saw that he sent more of his filthy texts but I had to ignore them to ensure that I wouldn't orgasm on my own fingers because of him.The more I thought about it, the more I realised that there was never a choice for me in the first place. That day when Dante visited my Dad, Jack called him in the middle of the meeting, telling him that he was going to surprise me with his arrival and going back in my memory to that Day, I saw Savaş talk to someone on the phone and I'm willing to bet my life on it that it was his father on the other line.In other words, Savaş knew that Jack was coming to con