Chapter 1:

Carla Rodriguez Hall.

Location: New York Presbyterian Hospital.

Seated in the doctor's office, for the hundredth time in one month, Richard held on to my hand in anticipation of the doctor's results.

It had been over two minutes of waiting, but it felt like an eternity.

"Babe, why is she taking so long?" I tapped the heel of my velvet brown boyfriend shoe while I looked up at the modern classical wall clock.

"Patience honey, I have a good feeling about today. Today is our lucky day." He answered back in a high-pitched cocky voice.

"I pray so." I bit my bottom lip while my eyes wandered around the room.

Suddenly the door creaked on the hinges as it opened then Doctor Sue confidently strolled in with a warm smile. She walked around her office desk with her stethoscope clasped in her hands.

"Good afternoon Mr and Mrs Hall, I'm sorry for keeping you waiting, but you know these things take time." She comfortably sat down in her chair and then placed the stethoscope on her neatly arranged desk.

With my heart racing wildly, I could not hold myself any longer, hence I asked the dreadful question.

"What do the results say?" I asked with my big dark eyes fixed on her.

Richard then squeezed my hand a little, as though he was telling me to keep quiet and let the doctor freely explain herself. I frowned at him.

Then Doctor Sue's warm smile faded away.

" I'm sorry, Carla but the test came out negative again." She said with a remorseful gaze.

My stomach dropped in my gut as a wave of mixed emotions flooded my mind. For once I had hoped of being pregnant because of the severe pregnancy symptoms I thought I was experiencing the past couple of weeks.

"What do you mean she is not pregnant? She hasn't seen her period for the whole month plus. So what will you say about that?" Richard asked, not bothering to hide his irritation and frustration. He let go of my hand and coiled it into a fist.

"Mr. Hall, the results came back negative. Your wife is not pregnant but might be experiencing stress that's why she is late." Doctor Sue responded while I felt empty inside. It was like my world had shuttered beneath my feet, And I was to be blamed.

Why did I expect different news when the inevitable was expected?

I heaved a sigh then took Richard's hand in mine and gently squeezed. I wanted him to remain polite to Doctor Sue because she had been nothing but nice to us for the past two years.

Besides, I wanted the doctor to think we are good people who deserved a baby, and his showing irritation might jinx us with more bad news.

The doctor sighed softly. " Like I said last time, you both are fine from the tests we took. Your case is what we call unexplained infertility, which is self-explanatory. "

And my darling husband shrugged unapologetically. "Self-explanatory my ass." He murmured with a sour expression on his face.

"Babe," I murmured with a prying stare… Richard was a kind man and I had never seen this side of him, maybe he too was becoming impatient.

He looked at me, then huffed and puffed with a serious gaze. "What?" he hissed in a low voice and I glared.

Why was he talking to me with so much bitterness?

"Physically, there is nothing stopping either of you two from conceiving a child the natural way. Carla ovulates on time, your sperm count is fine, and there is no sign of tube blockage. Everything is in order. You are a healthy young couple who needs to just wait for God's blessings to shower upon your lives." Doctor Sue confidently said with a reassuring smile.

"This is nonsense." Richard snapped while pushing his glasses further up his nose and looked doubtful.

"Mr. Hall, fifty percent of infertility is unexplained." Doctor Sue interjected with a serious gaze.

"Then there must be something else you can do." He exclaimed with clenched jaws.

Doctor Sue shrugged, looking tired and worn out as I did… but that's not what I wanted.

I wanted her to encourage and reassure me like some kind of cheerleader.

"Pray for a miracle." Doctor Sue said with a soft sigh.

"Pray?" Richard snapped with furrowed brows. " I thought you were a believer of science and that's why you are a doctor." He raised a question with a raised eyebrow.

"Mr. Hall, just because I'm a doctor, that doesn't mean I don't believe in a higher power. I'm a believer and proud to say so." She smirked with a serious bold face.

During their heated moment, my tongue got tied up, and I could not get a word in between their conversation... Besides I was having my own meltdown within me.

"What do you suggest we do then?" He asked while sighing.

"We could maybe run another test to see if your wife's vaginal fluids repel your sperm." She answered, raising my hope again.

"Yes, let's do that," I said in a shaky faint voice.

"Rubbish. My soldiers swim perfectly fine inside her." Richard suddenly jerked up from his seat and dragged me out of Doctor Sue's office. His anger was visible as he gasped for air with flared nostrils and a reddened face.

"Useless doctor indeed." He grunted repeatedly as he yanked me by my wrist.

"Awe, babe you are hurting me." I moaned while stumbling dangerously in the busy corridors to the hospital…

"She thinks that I'm not educated enough, I'm a doctor too," he grunted while a flurry of activities, with numerous people and equipment, were moving about. Nurses, doctors, and other medical professionals hurried back and forth, attending to patients and carrying out various tasks. Patients and their families walked or sat in chairs along the walls, waiting for appointments, test results, or updates on their conditions... New York hospitals were definitely one of the busiest places to visit.

I gasped while I bowed my head to avoid the ever-so-inquisitive stares that looked at me... It was as if Doctor Sue had announced our results on the intercom and everyone was taking pity on me.

The air was filled with the sounds of footsteps, chatter, and medical equipment beeping or humming. The walls were lined with posters and signs providing information about hospital services, directions, and safety protocols.

In addition to the people, equipment such as hospital beds, gurneys, and IV poles were wheeled through the hallway, making it a tight squeeze as we hurriedly walked towards the exit.

"Walk faster Carla," he said while tugging my wrist and I misstepped dangerously again.

"Richard, slow down." I moaned but he did not seem to care, he continued walking without looking back...

You see, whenever I close my eyes and think of a happily ever after, there are at least a dozen plump cute babies in the picture, but my happily ever after had not produced any offspring with thick dark curls like mine or Richard's velvet eyes.

I wanted to be a mother so badly, I married my high school sweetheart as soon as we left high school at the age of nineteen… I know, I was too young and naive most of you would say but I only wanted two things in life, a handsome quarterback turned veterinary doctor as a husband and lots of rosy-cheeked babies.

And now, I was a twenty-six-year-old, third-year student at university studying marketing and advertising all thanks to my hubby's determination, even though my mother-in-law saw it useless that I was studying a course that had nothing to do with the business we ran.

My Richard on the other hand, choose to be a veteran Doctor because of the booming family business his family owned in the ever-so-busy Hudson Square in New York City…

"That bitch ain't a real doctor. I'm in a better place to tell why we can not have kids." He groaned while tugging me to the underground parking lot we had parked the SUV.

I sighed and sneered while rolling my eyes at his statement.

Why ain't we pregnant if he is a better doctor???

When I started dating sexy Richard Hall in junior high, I knew instantly that he was the one for me and I immediately glide down the aisle and said I do, with dreams of holding our little bundles of joy as soon as possible, but instead, there had been zero babies and a lot of quarrels about not being able to convince after five years of marriage...

His family was at the forefront when it came to us having a baby, but I don't blame them, Richard was the only son to carry on their name to the next generation.

He had two elder unmarried sisters who lived in Africa, doing charity work with the organization they worked for, hence those were counted out of the invincible race going on.

"Babe, you are hurting me." I felt my fingers becoming numb due to the grip he had on me, but Richard's attention was fixed elsewhere, he did not respond to my cry…

"Let's get out of this useless place." He murmured and I felt tears well up in my eyes.

Why was this happing to me???

I loved babies so much, my close friends thought I had a weird fetish… but I did not care. All I knew was I'd be a great mother someday. I didn't even mind the screaming, smelly or ugly, I would not mind, trust me.

All I wanted was a family. A noisy, messy, demanding big family because I never had one growing up. I'm an orphan who was raised in different foster care homes in California and never knew what real family love felt like, but I was keen on having my own and spoiling my own mini-me…

And Richard being my partner was the ideal dad candidate because he liked kids. He was patient, kind, and fun. All our friends' kids loved him.

But then I had grown tired of trying even if it was the results that kept the physical attraction between the two of us going, it was becoming a strenuous job to keep up.

Anyway, these days, everyone knows everyone who can't get pregnant. It's like the latest pandemic… but it was a common sight of sympathy that was exhausting.

I sighed softly while my eyes saw Richard's mouth move as he said something but I could not hear his words, only Doctor Sue's words echoed in my ears.

The test came out negative, her vaginal fluids may be repelling your sperm… her voice repeatedly echoed and my heart sank…I will never hold my own baby?

Hearing how a couple is struggling to conceive, is a bit like hearing that a kid has mood swings. You are sorry but skeptical.

As a good candidate, I have read every article written on the subject, and it mostly blamed a woman for taking a lot of contraceptives or us being selfish as others put their careers before family. But that was not my case. I was willing to put family first and drop out of school if only God blessed me with my own bundle of joy.

We walked towards the car and I felt like my body was possessed by someone else who was trying to see the better picture of the scenario.

It's okay Carla, we can do this without anyone poking you with unending needles down there…

In the last two years, we had done all kinds of tests that many childless couples endured in order to discover why they were not blessed.

Poor Richard did not enjoy the visits the most, but I always thought men found medical checkups an intrusion on their bodies. I'm not saying I too enjoyed peeing in a cup and giving all kinds of blood samples. That was an intrusion into one's privacy if you asked me. But I was willing to go the extra mile for the joys of the results.

"Get in the car." Richard opened the door for me and walked to the driver's seat without waiting for me to get in the car and close the door like a gentleman I knew he was.