Where are we?I follow Shawn past a pair of doors and find myself in a luxurious space with crystal chandeliers hanging from a high ceiling and red velvet curtains on the fringes of huge glass windows that look out into the city. The carpet that covers the floor is red as well, but a deeper shade.At first, I think it's a restaurant because I spot a man in coattails and white gloves with a silver tray, but then I realize that the chairs are not arranged around tables like in a dining area.Rather, there are small round tables in between large, cozy armchairs, some with lamps perched on them. There are also low tables in front of divans and couches just like in a living room setting.Is this some kind of lounge?I follow Shawn across the room and up a winding staircase. At the top, another man in coattails leads us to a door. He opens it and I see a large table with a spread of food. There's a smaller one with two chairs right next to the window that has just a bottle of wine and two g
I start reading the eleven pages of the contract on top of my dining table.Eleven pages. Wow.I was going to read them earlier at that restaurant or club or whatever that was, but Shawn told me not to. Not that I would have been able to digest it with Shawn sitting right across from me staring. He said I should read it very carefully at home and then give him my answer on Monday.I guess that's what I'm doing now.I read it from start to finish even though some of the legal jargon is hard on the brain, even though at times I have to pause to let out a gasp or a curse. Then I read it again. All eleven pages.When I'm done, I stare at the front page in disbelief.A baby contract.Yup, that's exactly what it is.Basically, it says that I'll agree to have Shawn's baby, and take care of that baby — that child — in secret. In exchange, I'll get a huge amount of money, a house here and a vacation villa in Switzerland.Wow.I leave the papers on the table to get a drink of water. I keep the
Felicity can't be serious.Long after she's given me her answer, I still find myself glancing at the brown envelope on my desk in disbelief.I had the contract crafted carefully. It was rushed, yes, but my lawyer's good. He put in everything I asked him to, and I asked him to put in a lot of things, including a very generous sum of money.So why didn't Felicity sign it?Didn't she say she wanted to be a mother? Has she changed her mind?I want to summon her back into my office, tell her to cancel all my appointments and just have her tell me what's on her mind so she can make me understand why she said no, so I can convince her to say yes. But I wait until my work is done."Is there anything else I can do for you before I go home?" Felicity asks me when she pops into my office at the end of the day."Yes."I leave my desk and sit on the couch, brown envelope in tow. I place it on the table and gesture to the other couch."Sit."Felicity sits. She crosses her legs and clasps her hands
I can't stay here.I fight off a fresh wave of tears as I stuff my clothes inside my suitcase, the same one I just unpacked a week ago.I had a feeling Shawn wouldn't be happy with my decision not to sign that stupid contract, but I didn't think he was going to be such a jerk about it.It's selfish enough that all he sees me as is a baby maker. Then he goes on and says that the contract is in my best interest, that he's going to keep everything a secret for my sake when he's the one with a reputation to uphold. How dare he say I deserve to be happy while making sure I won't be.Then I find out he read my journal. He fucking read my journal, my most private possession.Don't they teach you in third grade not to go through other people's things?Yes, I was careless to leave it there. Yes, he owns the desk I left it on. Even so, he didn't have to read it. But he did. He read every page, I think. Every secret. Every wish. Every fantasy. And because of that, nothing feels real anymore.It'
The fog greets me as soon as I come out of the airport in New York. I smile because it feels like a hug from the city, welcoming me back.I drop my things at a hotel and grab a cup of coffee. I sip it as I reminisce inside the cab headed to the house where my parents and I used to live.So many memories.Even more of them come flooding back once I'm standing in front of the two-story house I know so well. It looks the same as when I left it. Dark blue roof. Pale blue walls. White door. White windows. White porch. The sign on the front says it's still for sale, so I guess no one has lived in it since I last did.I walk up to the front door. It's locked, of course. I peek through the window. All I see are pieces of furniture covered in white cloth, which in turn is covered in dust. Even hidden, I can recognize some of them, and I smile.I go around the house to the backyard. I see the patch of soil where my mother's garden used to be. Only weeds grow in it now.I also see her box of gar
"What on earth?"Ryker steps between Asher and me. He pushes me away and glances at Asher's nose."What the hell are the two of you doing?""Having our own party," Asher answers as he wipes his nose.I wipe the blood trickling from the corner of my mouth and swallow the rest. I draw a deep breath.Gradually, my temper subsides. As it does, my mind clears. I realize the stupidity of what I've just done and I slap my forehead."Fuck.""Fuck is right," Ryker says. Then he sighs. "Seriously, what are the two of you doing?""I just came up to check on him and found him drinking alone." Asher points to the bottle of Scotch.Ryker gives me a look of dismay. "What?""Then I told him he should just go after Felicity because we all know she's the reason why he's acting like this, and well... you saw what happened next. Or part of it."I sit on the couch and let out a sigh of my own."I can't go after Felicity."Enough with the denial and the drinking. It's not making anything better. Maybe talk
"That will be fifty-eight dollars and forty-nine cents," the pharmacist behind the counter tells me.My eyes grow wide. Nearly sixty bucks for a bottle of pain relievers, a tiny tube of pimple cream and a few bottles of water?I only have a fifty-dollar bill in my hand, so I quickly search my purse for a ten. I know I have one somewhere. Where is it again?I was hoping my headaches and dizzy spells would just go away. I thought that time I nearly fainted on the front porch of my old house would be the last episode. The person who helped me — she lived across the street — was a nurse who just told me to take iron supplements. I did, and for a day, I was fine. But last night, I felt dizzy again, nauseous even. This morning, I woke up with a headache. It's not that painful but it's literally at the back of my head, nagging at me.Also, I had no appetite this morning, and to make matters worse, when I looked in the mirror, I realized I had a pimple on my forehead. What the hell?The pharm
Cocky bastard."How do you intend on doing that?" I ask him."I'll do whatever it takes."He takes another step forward.I take another back but find the door behind me. I'm cornered. Shawn looks into my eyes. "I've missed you, Felicity."His words and his gaze send my pulse pounding, but I suppress my excitement. And my hopes. I promised myself I'd be smarter, stronger. Besides, he hasn't said the words I want to hear the most.I hold my chin high. "You just miss having sex with me, don't you? Isn't that why you wanted to have a baby with me? Just so you could have sex with me?""I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss the sex, but that's not why I want to be with you."I ignore him. "Or maybe you just don't want another man to have me?""Of course not," Shawn admits. "Is that so bad?""You just want to keep me on the bench.""Bench?""You're greedy. And you're selfish. And you're..."I stop talking because he's so close to me now, So close I can smell his cologne. I can't breathe."Why