Humiliation

The dusk felt lonely. Yet, here, I am looking at the horizon to get the last words of hope. Hope that my husband who left me, will accept my calls and talk to me. But, unfortunately, I couldn't able to.

Right now, I am standing in front of hundred people who are attending such a great party. My parents hold the party, to spread their threads of socialism and stand their family in front of the higher-ups who will be their tools for making money. They are more worried about our family status than I am, standing in the corner of the Hall room, without my husband.

"Oryx! Come here!"

I felt a jerk when my mother held my wrist and pulled me inside the guestroom. My skin burned under her tight grip.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

“ You are asking what's wrong? Your in-laws are here. They don't know that your husband didn't attend the party with you. Why didn't you bring him with you?"

Well, Her voice is screaming that I am the one who didn't bring her husband.

"He didn't pick up my phone calls!"

"Useless! You should have done everything properly from the very beginning. How the hell did you mess up? When will you be able to grow up? You are a burden, even after the wedding."

"Mom! Please!" I begged. Her words are stabbing me like a knife.

"Shut up. You are a failure. From the day you were born, I prayed and prayed, Please take her away keep him. But, I failed to protect him and you, and you become annoying, useless, and stupid. Why did you have to be my daughter? Why didn't you just die when-"

"Gwen! Where is Oryx? Marquis is here! She should meet him right now!"

She stopped when my father interrupted.

"Really? That's great!" She sounded playful.

"Oryx! Go and bring him here! If you dare to mess up! Remind you. I will go crazy!"

Hah! Why am I getting emotional? Isn't it supposed to be like this? Even, I know, I shouldn't have been born. I know, I believe and I trust that my mother is right. I'm nothing but a failure, a disgrace, and - Nevermind!

But, Why is he here? He didn't pick up my calls nor did leave any messages. Is it here to make fun of me? To see, how miserable I look right now?

Ahh! Fck! Why are you shedding tears like a stupid? You should be happy to learn that nobody like you has ever been born. You should be happy to see that your parents have constantly reminding your place.

Oryx! You are nothing but a disappointment, the worst daughter ever.

Stop crying! Let's move forward. You have me

OK? I love you. We don't need anything.

....

Although, I tried to calm myself down. But it was just wishful thinking. My heart has stopped forgetting when it should calm down.

The person, who I long for, is standing in front of me. So handsome, breathtaking, hot, and perfect, I am not going to compare him with some Greek god. Because he is unique. Every time I look at him, I end up questioning myself... ” How did God create him so perfectly?"

But, What is heartbreaking is, he, the person, is my lawful husband, I married him yesterday, he kissed my forehead, he vowed, he put the wedding ring on my finger, yet...

Yet, he is so far away from me. An untouchable impossibility that is supposed to be mine, but not exactly. He isn't mine.

He was so diligent and took care of me like I was a fragile and delicate doll. His soft smile left a throb in my heart. I was in love, I felt like I would be the happiest person which I always yearned for. But my love is now a fantasy. His eyes don't look at me like he used to do. Why? Where did I make some mistakes? Where did it turn so bitter? Why did he change so fast before I could grasp the situation.?

Please, look at me. I am standing here. Your other half. Your wife, please look at me. Did I do something wrong? Please explain it to me to understand. I will try to change myself. Just, please look at me for once.

"Oryx! My dear!"

My gaze swept over my father-in-law who approached me with a gentle smile. Hurriedly wiping the tears which didn't get visibility in the dim light, I smiled and turned to him.

I like this gentleman. Within two weeks, he got my entire respect which my father never could earn. He is a sweet, kind, and thoughtful human being who knows how to love and respect people. And, I trusted that his son would be like him, a gentleman.

But, he isn't. He doesn't have that heart that will move to me, give me the love that I am longing for.

" How are you doing? Dad. Hope you didn't have to face any trouble for coming here!"

I said with a bright smile. Living with a family where I didn't have any right to be happy but I had to pretend as I was. Now my pain always gets shrouded with the fake bright smile which sometimes mocks my misery.

" Please! You don't have to worry about me. I heard Marquis did leave you alone in his penthouse. I'm sorry, Girl. He is just a little hot-tempered. But don't worry. I will make him come back."

He tried to assure but I know love doesn't happen by force. His eyes are not on me. He is talking with everyone but he never gives me a chance to talk to him.

" No. It's fine. Don't force him He must be busy! Also, this marriage happened too suddenly!"

" No...Child. Marriage is full of responsibility and duty. You are his wife and family now. You should be his priority!"

Although you say that. But he doesn't think so. Watching his bothered face, I can feel it. He is forcing himself to be here.

" I got it. Don't worry. Please go and join my parents. They're dying to meet you!"

" Is that so?"

" Yes. We will have a long conversation once we get home!"

I need to avoid this conversation. I don't want Marquis to feel like I am making his parents hate him. He already hates me enough to abandon me on my wedding night.

I grab my wine glass and walk towards the balcony. My favorite place from where I can see my babies, I mean my flowers are blooming proudly. They are lovely. Like my best friends. Always keep comforting me. I love them.

However, my attention goes on the shadow which falls next to mine. I turn when I notice the shadow is long and it obviously belongs to a Man.

It's better to avoid any kind of men right now. But, I flinch, my body shakes when my face closes the space between the opposite person who is standing right behind me with a domineering Aura.

" M- Marquis?" I stepped back unintentionally but hastily not to bump into him. But my heel stumbled and broke as I tried to support myself.

" Ah!" I shut my eyes with terror, but inside I have a glimpse of hope that he will help me not to fall. My prestige will be vanished if I fall right now.

However, I felt pain in my back when my body abutted the floor. The gown, Mom bought for me, ripped around my waist, and an electric shock went through my body with a sharp pain when my elbow hit the handrail with sound.

A loud whimper escapes from me. I look up dishearteningly. Finding everyone's eyes are on me, someone accidentally laughed at my misery. However, it doesn't hurt that much as much as it's hurting when I find my husband standing in front of me with his indifferent pose and expression.

Tears don't have any plans to stop. The pain inside my heart is overtaking the pain in my ankle, my waist, and my elbow. I feel ashamed, disgusted by myself, and humiliated.

But it's nothing in front of that man who is silently watching me. I am pretty sure he is enjoying this. He is happy now.

" Marquis! What are you doing? Help your wife. She is hurt! Her hand is bleeding!"

My father-in-law broke the silence. Approaching us from the hall room. Marquis rolls his eyes. He is disgusted by me Someone clumsy. I am pretty sure. My heart is clenching. I didn't want to show myself like this either.

But, It hurts my ego as well. He didn't mind showing everyone how miserable I looked right now. He didn't mind watching me fall and getting hurt. I am hurt and heartbroken by him.

" Help him" Mr. Williamson pushes him.

But I yank his hand when he extends his arms to hold me up. Don't need to show pity.

" I am fine. Thank you. I can walk?" I said smiling brightly. It's fine. I can do everything by myself. I don't need anyone's pity on me.

" Disgusting!"

Thump! I couldn't even stand up properly when he whispers himself. Disgusting? He finds me disgusting? How could he say that?

I wanted to look at him. But clenching my jaw, I endure and walk inside slowly. If I turn, I may not be able to keep my smile. I will end up crying loudly. My chest is getting heavy and hard to breathe because of holding the screaming inside.

But I got titled as Disgusting by my husband.