Humiliation

>>Portia

I didn’t get to go after him or say anything.

“Girls!” Because before I could, the head maid caught us, “What are you doing here!?” Her voice made us both flinch and look at her, “To the kitchen!” She pointed at us and we scurried away.

As we ran out of there I turned my head to look at the man, my man, but the corridor was now empty.

Disappointment flooded my head and my heart. I wanted to talk to him, I wish I could have talked to him. At least I would have gotten his name but luck wasn’t on my side.

Rather than luck, on the contrary, it was something far worse.

“You!” Before Grey and I made it back into the kitchen we were stopped by Emily and Lilith right outside of it.

“Yes?” We both replied as we turned to face them.

“You!” Emily pointed at me, “Bring the drinks to the drawing room for the guests.” 

In the drawing room? Who’s in the drawing room? Other guards? Some other people? Because surely enough the people with Prince Ulrich went to the meeting room. Well, there were other guards there too.

“And you,” Lilith pointed at Grey, “Go bring us some hot dumplings.”

“But miss-” Grey was about to put on a proper argument, “I would have to go to the shop-”

“We don’t care,” They folded their arms, “Get to it.” They glared at us both and we glanced at each other and nodded. Grey isn’t even an official made, she only helps out during her holidays which are about to end soon yet the twins like torturing her because she’s friends with me. It makes me feel all the more guilty and miserable.

“How many people?” I asked, then suddenly remembered the bruise on my face, “And- my face,”

“Shut up, you pig,” Lilith was annoyed, “Bring five glasses.” She rolled her eyes at me.

“Why aren’t you leaving?” Emily glared at Grey who then immediately left the place. The twins then began to walk away, “You better hurry too. And put a bandaid on that ugly face or something.”

Their words stung like usual, but what could I say back to them? I was nothing more than a lowly servant

“Yes…”

***

What I wasn’t expecting were the three guards I saw with Prince Ulrich to be there in the guest room. When I opened the door and looked at them, I paused for a moment as my heart skipped a beat from looking at my mate, then I moved forward to do my job.

“Egon,” The brown-haired guy elbowed my mate, “Look it’s your favorite drink, fruit punch.”

Egon…

His name is Egon. A smile automatically appeared on my face as an unexplainable feeling of glee came over.

I placed the tray on the table and was about to silently back away when I received another order.

“Hey, pig!” Lilith ordered making me freeze, “Bring us some ice.” Her words made my heart which was previously thumping loudly in happiness, drop to the pit of my stomach. I wasn’t expecting her to call me that in front of guests. I looked at her in horror but she paid me no heed.

Egon’s eyes went wide momentarily, “Pig?” He looked at Lilith with contempt and that gave me hope. It was a small gesture but maybe he was going to do something about it.

“Don’t look at me like that.” She waved her hand dismissing his words, “Her name literally means pig, don’t think too much about it.” 

I gulped and waited for his response. My eyes were glued to him, full of hope and longing. We’re destined together, right? He should respond to this somehow. I wouldn’t take this disrespect for my mate.

“I see,” He nodded and dismissed it like he was told to, breaking my heart. His response was so nonchalant, it made me rethink again.

Are we not mates? Did I make a mistake? Was I wrong because I’m defective?

“Oi, pig” Emily snapped her fingers at me, “The ice?”

“Yes…” I bowed slowly and left to grab the ice.

I’ve never heard of this before.

I’ve only heard of werewolves being able to tell when they meet their mate. I’ve never heard of anyone making a mistake…

I opened the door but glanced back once before leaving, I can’t be wrong though.

How can this feeling be mistaken?

I placed my hand on my chest.

Then why is he doing this? Does he not like me? Is he disappointed because I’m an attractive lowly servant?

I gulped and left the room.

I hope that’s not the case.

***

When I came back a few minutes later, I heard them talking among themselves, “Still,” The man with brown hair and eyes spoke, “You shouldn’t call her that.” I went and placed the ice bowl on the table, then stepped back to stand by the wall.

“Adar,” Emily smirked, “You seem awfully concerned about her.” She glanced at me making me flinch.

Were they talking about me?

“Just saying.” Adar shrugged, “She’s a maid of your house.” He looked at the other guy, “Right Koen?” Koen just nodded, he didn’t seem like the talkative type.

“Well, she’s turning eighteen soon so either she’ll get kicked out of the house or dad will have her marry someone for the pack.” Lilith rolled her eyes, “So who cares?”

“But who will marry her?” Emily snorted, “Look at how ugly she is.” The twins laughed. Koen and Adar just shook their heads as they chuckled while Egon drank his drink in silence.

He passed no remark and made no effort to even try.

I felt ashamed, just standing there by the wall. Listening to them degrade me in front of my mate was humiliating.  I had my head down, I didn’t want Egon to see my face. I knew I had an ugly expression on because of how hurt I was.

"Have you seen her hair?" Emily scoffed

"That dirty red color is so ugly," Lilith answered.

I became conscious of it all over again. I know my hair color is weird and to top it off it's frizzy too and so my hair always looks funny. This is why I braid it.

I’ve been treated like this for years but never have I ever felt this insulted. I had my hands tied in front of my skirt. They were so tightly overlapping each other that they began to hurt but it was the only way for me to stop myself from crying.

It was then when I was facing down, I realized how worn out my clothes were. I hadn't gotten a change for quite some time. I've been wearing the same set of clothes for three years now. My body didn't change much after I turned fifteen. 

I gulped and dug my nails into my hands as the shame I was already feeling got worse. I have every quality of an unattractive person. It makes sense why Egon’s ignoring me.

I must look filthy… 

Like a pig…

I pursed my lips tightly.

I should leave.