"Do you have an appointment, Miss?" an elderly gentleman in a teal blazer asked.
"Hi, yes I do," I smiled. He led me to a number reel and handed me a piece of paper with a number.
"You can sit here dear, and when they call your number you can go see the receptionist. Have your cards ready and have a nice day" he said walking towards another helpless soul. A chime indicated the number change on the screen and I made my way to the chair across from the receptionist.
"Health card?" she asked and began typing furiously. "You haven't been to this hospital before?" I shook my head. "Okay, you'll have to fill out this form so we can open a chart for you here. When you are done you can come right back here and I will register you okay?" She handed me a clipboard with a pen attached to it and I filled in the questionnaire as I was told. It took at least 15 minutes for her to register me.
"You will have your ultrasound first, so just follow the green arrows and put this file in box number 14, have a great day" she smiled. I was greeted by a technician when I arrived at box 14, he brought me to a changing room and instructed that I remove everything above the belt and to don 2 hospital gowns.
"The first one ties in the back, and you wear the second one like a housecoat, '' he instructed. "Just come right into the room when you are ready". The gowns were itchy against my skin and a little suffocating. I walked over to the technician’s room pulling the second robe tightly around me, disliking how naked I felt without my bra on.
"You can take off this robe" he said pointing to the housecoat "and untie the other one at the back, I will need full access to your neck and shoulders" he said while fiddling with a large machine. Dumbfounded, I wondered why they bothered giving me the second robe if I was going to remove it so soon, but I kept my questions to myself.
I laid flat on a hard leather table with my neck hyperextended. The technician squirted some warm gel on my throat and proceeded with the ultrasound. I stared at the technician for any signs of surprise or concern but his face was completely unreadable. After what seemed like forever he announced that he was going to page the radiologist to come and do the biopsy. I glanced at the clock to see that it was already 4. I wished someone had come with me to help me pass the time and help calm my nerves. I took a deep breath and relaxed my muscles which were incredibly tense. A heaviness sat on my chest as my anxiety mounted. If only I could turn back time and never mention this lump to my doctor. Now that I had asked questions, I was afraid of the answers I would find. I was scared and alone. I started to hyperventilate as the radiologist walked in.
"Miss Saunders, I'm doctor Khenessi, I will be doing the biopsy on your lump. How are you doing?" he asked. I swallowed hard and smiled at him. How the hell do you think I’m doing, you’re about to poke me in the throat with a needle!
"Good, thanks" I replied.
"Good, so this procedure doesn’t take very long but we do have to keep you here for half an hour afterwards to monitor your vital signs" he explained. I nodded at him. "First thing I’m going to do is freeze that area of your neck, then, once it's numb I'll use this ultrasound to guide the biopsy needle. You might feel some pressure but you shouldn’t feel any pain. If you do, let me know. Is that clear?"
"Yes doc" my mouth was incredibly dry in pure fear.
The doctor left the room and a nurse walked in.
"Miss Harper Saunders?'' She asked "My name is Linda, I will be assisting Doctor Khenessi. '' Can you tell me your date of birth?"
"October 6th, 1988" I replied
"Do you have any allergies dear?" She grabbed my arm and looked at the armband there.
"No"
"Thanks dear" she said with a warm smile. She pulled out a package wrapped in blue paper and I watched as she meticulously opened it, setting a few instruments on it and pouring some clear pink liquid in a bowl. She made it all look like a precise art. The radiologist walked back in, washed his hands and put on long latex gloves from a package the nurse had opened for him. He grabbed the tongs in the set up and doused a few big cotton balls in the clear pink liquid before rubbing it on my throat. The liquid was cold and ran down the back of my neck and into my hair.
"Okay Miss Saunders this will pinch a little but it will numb your throat" he approached my neck with a needle and it did indeed pinch. He waited a few minutes and poked at my neck to ensure the skin was numb, satisfied that the medication had its intended effect, he grabbed the ultrasound wand and a different needle, I assume was the biopsy needle and poked around in my neck. I felt as if someone was gently pushing against my windpipe. Although uncomfortable it was not painful. He pulled out the needle and handed it to the nurse who placed a sticker on it as he placed a bandage on my neck. "That's it Miss Saunders, we should get the results back in about 6 weeks"
"6 weeks?" I asked incredulously, "That's an awfully long time" I complained.
"I know, unfortunately, that's how long it takes to get these results back" he shrugged. The nurse wheeled my bed into a different room and checked my vital signs.
"Do you have someone who will pick you up, dear?" she asked
"Yes"
"Did you want me to give them a call? You should be fine to go in 15 minutes"
"Sure, it's this number" I said, giving her Gabriel's business card and pointing to his cellphone number. She looked at the name and her eyebrows flew up.
"Oh, you know Gabriel Mason?" she asked.
"He's my… yes, I do," I said unsure why I felt the need to explain myself.
"I'll go give him a call and be right back with your discharge papers." I touched my throat and was disconcerted by numbness there. It was a strange sensation, although still pain free. The nurse returned with papers and announced that Gabriel had been called and was on his way.
"You might feel some pain once your throat thaws, but that’s completely normal, so is swelling and bruising. If there is any bleeding you should come right back here though, that’s not usually an expected outcome. Do you have any questions dear?" she asked.
"No, I'm good thanks" I said as she handed me a pen and indicated where I needed to sign. She tore one of the carbon copies from the stack and handed it to me before helping me get dressed. I was thankful I had chosen a V-neck shirt as my neck was certainly a little stiff.
"I'll send one of the care attendants to get you and bring you to the front door. Good luck dear." She smiled at me warmly.
I was wheeled to the front door where Gabriel was waiting. I got up from the wheelchair and saw Gabriel flinch; he must have thought I wasn’t supposed to be up and walking, or maybe he didn’t know what a biopsy was but he was certainly startled by my appearance.
"Where did you want me to bring you?" he asked in a gruff voice.
"Uhm… back to the camp" I raised a brow at him.
"You're not working tomorrow" he announced looking at me for a fleeting second.
"I'll be just fine tomorrow, it was just a biopsy"
"You need to rest the nurse told me"
"What? She didn't say that to me" I said, shocked at this new information. "Well I still have to go back to the camp, all my stuff is there"
"You don't have anyone out here to stay with?"
"No, I’m not from here, that’s why I stay at the camp on the weekends" I said, exasperated.
"I still think you should stay out here tonight, in case something happens, you’ll be closer to the hospital"
"I'm fine Mr. Mason" I said, rolling my eyes. He didn’t reply but drove to a house about 10 minutes away.
"You'll stay here this weekend" he announced puting the truck into park and killing the engine, "I'll get Janice to pack your things and bring it to you tomorrow"
"Who lives here?" I asked, looking out at the small brick house. He was already out of the truck and opening my door.
"Don’t-!" he warned as I jumped from the truck, regretting it instantly. I winced as my neck was thawing and feeling quite tender. He gave me a reproving glance and shook his head at me.
"Who lives here?" I repeated, trying to get my mind off the soreness in my neck.
"I do"
"You?" I asked, shock evident in my voice. His eyes widened at me as he turned his hands up as if it was the most obvious thing ever.
He unlocked the front door and I followed him in. I was astounded at being inside his house. There was hardly any furniture or personal items decorating the little house. The living room looked massive with its solitary leather couch and a measly coffee table. An acoustic guitar laid on one side of the couch and a woolen blanket on the other. To the left the little kitchen had no table in favor of an island counter with stools. A coffee maker and a microwave sat next to each other on the counter. There were no magnets or photos on the fridge, no Live, Love, Laugh decals anywhere in sight. I sniggered at the thought, and Gabriel narrowed his eyes at me as one corner of his mouth lifted in a crooked smile.
"What?" he asked.
"Nothing," I smiled. He kept his small smile but his forehead furrowed.
“The bathroom is over there," he pointed to a door next to the living room. "And you can sleep in here" he said as he opened the door to a large bedroom with a king sized bed. There were no decorations here either but a full dark maple bed set complete with dressers, side tables and headboard filled the room. The walls were painted a beautiful forest green which perfectly complemented the maple hardwood floor and furniture. The comforter on the bed was a different shade of green and was tucked neatly at the bottom to form sharp mitred corners.
"Wow, it's beautiful!" I whispered.
"Are you hungry?” he asked, “You probably haven’t eaten since breakfast..." he remarked. Before I had a chance to answer he was pulling out his phone from his front pocket and scrolling through it. "I want to place an order for takeout," he said into the receiver.. "Gabriel Mason, I'll have the usual, with a number four with rice noodles, a number six and 2 orders of spring rolls… thanks" he hung up. "I'll go get that, make yourself comfortable" he turned on his heels and walked out. I watched him through the window as he swung himself into his truck and drove off. I sat on the leather couch eyeing the guitar at the other end, unable to entertain the idea that it belonged to Gabriel. I smirked as I imagined him playing Nothing Else Matters like all the guys did when I went to high school. This was so weird.
The door suddenly swung open, I got up to help Gabriel with the take out order but I came face to face with a girl around my age or slightly younger.
"Who the fuck are you and why are you in my house?" She said, frowning at me and taking me in.
"I'm Harper" I said, a little stunned.
"Are you sleeping with my dad?"
"God no!" I recoiled in surprise.
"Then why are you here?" she demanded. I was spared having to answer when the door opened again and Gabriel appeared holding two bags of take out Thai food. He looked from me to the girl, a frown appearing on his face again.
"Chris, I didn’t expect you here tonight" he said to the girl.
"Neither did I. You promised you wouldn’t bring your whores here" she spat, turning and walking into a bedroom.
"Chris!" he shouted after her. He let out a long exasperated breath then looked at me in apology as he set the bags on the counter.
"The plates are in that cupboard" he pointed, "eat whatever you want, I have to go deal with her."
I examined each of the containers, and unable to make up my mind about any single one of them, I sampled all of the food. There was curry, spring rolls and Asian noodles. I savored the delicious Thai food as I tried to block the yelling coming from the second bedroom wishing I had my headphones. I stared into space while I ate, concentrating on the most delicious take-out food I had ever tried. I washed my plate and cutlery and placed it back in the cupboard.
"Did you eat enough?" Gabriel's voice resonated behind me. I turned to look at him, and smiled.
"Yes, it was delicious, thank you" I answered. "If you let me know what time you leave tomorrow I'll go back to the camp for the weekend."
"You can stay here" he shrugged as he doled out the food onto his plate, "Chris and I won’t be here, so you'll have the place to yourself"
"Oh, well I don’t want to be a bother"
"You won't be, no one will be here" he said with a clipped tone. He exhaled loudly, "Sorry, I'm just a little worked up. It's up to you, do what you want, I just need to grab some clothes from my room before you go to bed. He finished his spring roll and made his way to the bedroom, coming back out just moments later with a pillow and some clothes. "If you're staying the weekend you can put the leftovers in the fridge, if not just toss them out" he called as he grabbed the guitar and sat on the couch. I placed the still full containers in the fridge and listened to him play.
"Thanks for letting me stay, and thanks for supper, I'll just go to bed now" I said softly, feeling awkward. He nodded though his full concentration was on the guitar he was plucking. I left the door ajar so that the music would drift into the room as I tried to sleep.
Far too soon there was a light knock at the door.
"Harper?" a husky voice asked.
"Huh?" I narrowed my eyes at the sliver of light entering the room as I remembered where I was.
"Did you want to come to the camp to get your stuff or do you want Janice to pack it for you?"
"I'll go," I said in a groggy voice. I flipped the sheets off of me to get up. I dressed quickly and pulled my hair into a messy bun on top of my head before heading out into the early morning. Gabriel stopped by a coffee shop and ordered us both breakfast sandwiches and coffee. "Do you cook at all?" I asked, curiously.
"Nope," he replied, taking a sip of his scalding coffee. We drove the entire way there without talking while listening to the radio’s morning talk show until we were out of range. I made my way to the kitchen to discover that Oli was in charge and Janice had everything under control. I made myself useful and got the coffee and tea station set up.
"How did everything go?" Janice enquired after breakfast.
"It went okay, I won’t know anything for another 6 weeks though" I shrugged, filling the sink with hot soapy water. Oli was putting the food in takeaway containers so that some of the men staying at the camp would have something to eat during the weekend.
"That's a long time to not know" she confirmed
"That's what I said"
"Are you staying here this weekend?"
"I think I'll check with Matteo, if he stays I will too, otherwise I might head into town."
As it turned out Matteo was heading into town so I spent the weekend at Janice’s again. We spent our days off celebrating together, sipping mai tais by the pool in her backyard. I had gotten absolutely hammered, pushing away the fears I had about the biopsy to the back of my mind. I was still a little buzzed when Gabriel came to pick me up from Janice’s house on Sunday night. As soon as we were out of the driveway I grabbed Gabriel’s discarded sweatshirt, rolled it up and used it as a pillow against the window; I slept the whole way back. I woke up some time later at the campsite where it was pitch black out. The truck was parked by Gabriel’s cabin but the engine was turned off and he was nowhere to be found. I unbuckled my seat belt and jumped out of the truck. I looked for my bag in the back of the truck but it wasn't there and neither were the groceries. I walked over to my cabin in the blinding darkness, stumbling along the way. Gabriel was coming out of my cabin and was startled when he saw me approach.
"I just brought your bag, I didn’t want to wake you"
"Thanks," I said, still groggy.
"Good night Harper"
"Good night Mr. Mason," I said. His large hand grabbed my upper arm as he passed next to me. I looked down in shock. I felt a thrill run through me, and I wasn’t sure why. His other hand reached for my chin turning my face up towards him, his gaze bore into mine for a moment and my breath caught in my throat.
"Call me Gabriel" he ordered, "Please"
"Ok" I replied breathless. His hands dropped away from me and he walked towards his cabin. I tossed and turned as I tried to settle to sleep, but I didn’t get much sleep that night.
Oli and I had gone over the next week's menu and I had agreed to give him more freedom in the kitchen. I was still going to do most of the work but I was going to let him do breakfast on his own the following week. Oli turned out to be an excellent cook and we developed a certain rhythm not unlike the one Janice and I had. He followed my directions a lot better and seemed to be improving his skills during his time at the camp.
In the evening, Matteo kept me company until about 8pm. We would either watch a movie or play a board game before turning in.
"Will you be staying here this weekend?" he inquired on Thursday
"Yeah, I wouldn’t mind just vegging all weekend," I admitted.
The weather was beautiful all weekend so Matteo and I packed lunch and spent most of Friday afternoon by the river. I read a book while trying to get a bit of a tan while Matteo wrote to his family and read the letters they had sent him over the week.
It rained all of Saturday so I stayed in my cabin and watched movies by myself. Matteo had taken advantage of the crappy weather to sleep in and he insisted on cooking super for the two of us in the early evening. When we returned from the river on Sunday, we were surprised to see that several people had come in early, including Gabriel, which was unusual. Normally the crew came in after supper and when Gabriel didn’t have to give me a drive back he would only show up early Monday morning. I helped Gabriel and Oli unload the groceries and examined every item.
"Did you stay here all weekend boss?" Oli asked with a grin.
"I sure did" I said absentmindedly looking at the receipt Gabriel had given me.
"What do you do here on the weekend with no internet?" he asked incredulously.
"I spent most of my time by the river with Matteo," I replied. "These tomatoes and herbs are way too expensive, I think we should start growing our own next year" I pointed out looking over the receipt Oli had handed me. Gabriel looked at me with a raised eyebrow and shrugged.
"If you want"
"If I’m here I will" I decided
"Why wouldn't you be here?" he asked
"You’ve threatened to fire me two months in a row... So I’m guessing you have someone else in mind. Anyways, pass on the message to your next cook!" I said with a teasing grin. Once Oli left I began organising the fridge and cupboard the way I liked them and Gabriel stayed behind watching me.
"Is there something between you and Matteo" Gabriel enquired.
"No!" I exclaimed, baffled,
"So what are you two up to?"
"Nothing, he's my friend. That's it"
"Really?"
"Yes! Plus he's married and has kids at home"
"So? They're not here" he said.
"That doesn’t matter! I'm not some cheap whore who sleeps with a guy cause he pays attention to me" I cried out. Gabriel shrugged. "Is that what you think I am?"
"I don't know Harper," he started sounding annoyed. "You work in the middle of the woods with 40 men who haven’t seen their families in I don’t know how long. I just thought maybe you two were sleeping together."
I wrinkled my nose in disgust.
"I'm not working here to sleep around. I really enjoy the work I do" I defended. "And on top of that I have a bit more self respect than sleeping with anything on two legs" I retorted bitterly at him.
He glared at me and left the kitchen.
"Well if the shoe fits Mr. Mason" I said under my breath.
Oli’s last week was uneventful. I let him lead and he did an incredible job. I was pretty happy with the way he turned out and felt sad that I was going to have to start over the next week with a new student.
Maria showed up on Sunday night, she was a sweet girl around my age who was eager to do every single thing I asked. She was very helpful but still lacked confidence in her skills. She always asked a million questions to make sure she was on the right track or doing things exactly the way I liked them. "You have to make some decisions by yourself" I told her on Thursday after she asked me to try the salads she had put together to tell her what was missing. She looked hurt at my comment and I felt awful. But I knew she had to grow a spine and make decisions on her own if she was going to make it in the real world. "Listen, Maria, I’m not trying to be mean, but next week you are going to be the one bossing me around. I want you to be making decisions. I will be here to support you, but you need to assert yourself." She nodded at me, her big brown eyes full of tears.
I woke up late the next morning when my phone was ringing loudly. "Hello?" I answered groggily. "Harper, can you be ready to go in 30 minutes, I have an emergency to attend to at the camp" Gabriel said quickly. "Uh huh, 30 minutes" I replied. "You'll be ready?" "Yup" I said, closing my eyes. 10 more minutes I thought to myself as I fell asleep. I was rudely awoken by a loud urgent banging at the door. "HARPER!" Gabriel yelled from the other side. I frantically looked for my phone and saw that I had 8 missed calls in the last 15 minutes. Shit! Luckily all of my things were contained already, I just had to grab a pair of jeans and a sh
We spent Friday night eating McDonalds and watching Die Hard. I had fallen asleep before the movie was over and was barely aware that Gabriel covered me with a blanket before going into his bedroom.I was awoken by the smell of coffee and breakfast wraps on Saturday morning. Gabriel and I ate in silence next to each other at the island counter. My fingers were itching to grab my phone and scroll through facebook to break the awkwardness of being with Gabriel."I have a huge favour to ask," Gabriel said, finally breaking the silence."What's that?" I asked, relieved to be speaking."Do you think you can make lasagna for supper?" he asked, a tinge of pink forming over his face working hard not to smile. He looked like a little boy asking for m
When I had left for New Brunswick in the spring I had to let my apartment go. I hadn’t planned on coming back so soon, but I didn’t want to be held back by an empty apartment if something came up. I had graduated from the local community college in my town and worked at a few restaurants before getting a bit of a break with Gabriel’s company. The job was hard to fill as it was in an isolated area with little to no means of external communication. It was certainly not a family friendly kind of job either, I had just been gone for a better part of the year with only weekends off. Regardless, I had no one tying me down, and I found it liberating to be so far away from the outside world. I had made some real good friends there during the season and I was seriously planning on returning. I dreamt of Gabriel for the first month I had returned home, looking back at him with rose coloured glasses and replaying our weekend together had given me a different perspec
I spotted Gabriel before he saw me, he was pacing around the arrival gate deep in conversation on his phone, his frown ever so present on his face. My heart fluttered when he looked up towards me and a large grin formed on his face. He promptly hung up and gathered me in his arms in a warm welcoming hug. I was shocked by his reception based on the conversations we had in the last few months.“You look great Harper,” he said, checking me out while holding at arms length.“Thanks, you don’t look too shabby yourself” I replied. He had shaved his dark curls in favor of a buzzcut, and he sported a short beard . I had never seen him with facial hair longer than a day or two’s worth, but it looked good on him. It even made him look a little younger than 37. He placed an arm around my shoulder and carried the small suitcase with all of my measly belongings to his truck. We drove to his house with the AC on full
*Rather explicit content ahead*We spent another quiet ride together, but despite the tension in the cab I was excited to get to the camp. I smiled fondly at my old cabin and the dining hall as we approached them. I wasted no time jumping out of the truck and grabbing the groceries from the back. I brought everything inside and put away the items the way I liked them before heading to my cabin. I half expected to see my kitchen helper but my cabin was empty. The room I had been using the previous season was already occupied, so I shifted all my things to the other, smaller bedroom. Despite being a creature of habit, I wasn’t overly upset about the switch of rooms.There was a knock at the door and I turned to see Gabriel standing on the other side of the screen door.“Come in” I said, beckoning him with a finger. He looked around the cabin silently for a moment. “Are you ok?” I asked.
“HARPER!” I was jolted awake by the loud booming voice. Gabriel was still in my bed and I rushed to grab my clothes on the ground to dress. “Harper!” the voice came again. This time I recognised it as Matteo’s. Gabriel must have recognised it too as he groaned and pulled the covers over his head. “Be right there Matty” I called out pulling my hair back into a ponytail and trying to look decent. I heard the screen door open and my friend stepped in as I pulled the door to my room shut. “Baby Girl!” He called out with a joyful smile on his face. He pulled me into an embrace and I returned the warm affection “I missed you so much Harper!” he announced, “You look good, home was good for you!” “O
The first month was incredibly trying with Maria’s constant belittling, defiance and sabotaging. She never missed a chance to mention how sexually satisfied she was and loved draping herself all over Gabriel when he did show up to eat with the guys. Those moments were far and few between but it always created a very tense atmosphere when he did.I began obsessing about the lump in my throat as the sensation of suffocation woke me up each night. I had mentioned it to Matteo who urged me to see the ENT again to get more answers about my situation. I finally gave in and called Dr. Helm who agreed to book another ultrasound and biopsy. I drove out to the city with Matteo and went through the whole process again. The two of us shared a hotel room for the weekend and gorged ourselves on take out Chinese and pizza.Matteo mentioned that Gabriel was at a different work location for a few weeks and I immediately felt the tension in my body me
Lane and her boyfriend Alexy, along with Matteo and his wife, were joining us on our vacation, having rented the cottages next to ours for the week. Lane, who was 33 weeks pregnant and glowing, had been visiting us at least every 2 months for the first three years after Emily was born until she met one of Gabriel’s employees one summer and fell madly in love with him. Since my mom had also met someone back home and was living with him, Lane felt less guilt about moving out to New Brunswick. Her and her boyfriend were living in a beautiful home only 10 minutes drive away from Gabriel and I.Matteo’s kids were all grown now and rarely followed their parents around anymore. He and his wife were enjoying their first solo vacation in years, but had decided to spend it with our family. Being godparents to Felix, they tried to be as present in our lives as they could.
“I. don’t. Want. to. Go!” Emily shouted, clearly exhausted by our little family vacation. We had pulled up to the Champlain Mall in Dieppe to pick up a few things I had forgotten at home before we made it to the cottage we had rented by the ocean another 45 minutes away.“I can stay with her while you get what you need, baby,” Gabriel offered, the most patient out of the two of us. With a lump in my throat and trying to keep the tears at bay I nodded. “You can leave Felix in the truck too if you want” he offered looking over to our 4 year old with a grin. Felix looked so much like Hendrix it was freaky and the two, despite the age difference, were thick as thieves.“Do you want to stay with daddy or come with mommy, Fee?” I asked.“Daddy!” he exclaimed.“Okay I will be back as soon as possible” I said, unbuckling my seat belt. Ga
I watched the people milling about from the dining room window, there were 30 or so people waiting in the backyard while rock music played on. I couldn’t see Gabriel from where I was standing but I could just imagine what he looked like in an outfit similar to Hendrix’s. I could hardly contain my excitement at seeing him.I admired Lane’s beautiful set up and hoped it wasn’t going to rain, as the skies were grey with clouds. Lane had strategically hung white sheer linen in some of the trees and placed lanterns as decorations. There were rows of white chairs occupied by the guests and white flower petals down the would-be aisle. I spotted a makeshift bar with huge ‘Beer and Whiskey’ signs hanging above it and laughed. Of course Gabriel would make sure the guests were well ‘watered’. The backyard had a very magical feeling about it. 
With everyone’s help and support the first week of Emily’s life went on without a hitch. I went on a few emotional roller coasters and woke up soaked in sweat a few times at night. But in all I couldn’t ask for a better baby. Emily was easily content, sleeping most of the day and only waking for feeds and diaper changes.My mom took on the role of grandmother very well, she rocked, washed, and cooed at Emily every chance she had. Janice cooked up a storm for everyone staying with us and froze several meals for when we were on our own again. Lane and I spent most of Emily’s feeding time in my bed going over wedding details and ideas.“I trust you, Lane” I told her for the millionth time, “do whatever you want!” Lane took a deep exasperated breath and let it out slowly, gently stroking Emily’s head. 
At 40 weeks, I was exhausted, cranky and swollen all over. I went out for walks with Axel and Gabriel every morning while Lane had been sending Janice new recipes to induce labor for the last two weeks and each day, Janice brought me some new miraculous concoction guaranteed to work. At night Gabriel gave me mind shattering orgasms to stimulate contractions, and I felt bad that his fiancé was now the size of a beached whale. Not that he would say such things, but I was disheartened by the way I looked and felt. I knew it was temporary but I was getting anxious to meet my baby. Sam, Janice’s boyfriend, was helping with some projects around the house and cottage to keep Gabriel occupied while the four of us waited impatiently for the stork to drop by.Finally one night as we lay in bed after an ordinary day, I felt a distinct popping in my lower belly before a rush of liquid squirted out of me. As fast as I could, I rolled out of bed and waddled
“Gabe I know you’re going to hate this idea, but I booked myself in for a maternity photoshoot and I would love for you to be there” I said, bracing myself for the inevitable rejection.“Sure,” he said, not taking his eyes off his laptop screen.“Were you listening?”“Yes, you have a maternity photoshoot and you want me to be there”“In the photos though”“Yes, that’s fine” he said as he placed his laptop on the coffee table and grabbed my foot to massage it.“You're sure?” I asked, stifling a groan of pleasure as he massaged my calf.“Yes Harper, I will be there in the photos with you and your belly. It’s fine” he said with finality.“Oh, well thank you”“When is it?”&
By December Gabriel and I had fully returned to our old routine. Though the pain of losing a baby never quite goes away, it becomes a little more bearable as the days go on.Sally had asked me to return to the diner for the winter, but I got an even more enticing job as an instructor at the community college. I would deliver a certain amount of theory content during the fall and winter semesters and in the summer I would take on the students at Gabriel’s work sites in order to give them hands-on practice. After a long and thorough conversation with Gabriel I sadly declined Sally’s offer and took on the college job. I loved having a 9-4 job that allowed me to be at home in the evening. Gabriel had secured a few building jobs around town and was also home every night. He frequently assured me he didn’t find life with me dull and always looked forward to coming home and seeing me each night.Our new house was everything I co
*Warning, this chapter deals with traumatic subject matter that could upset some readers*We had made it to the last couple of weeks of the summer with very little excitement at the camp. Everything seemed to be running smoothly and Gabriel proudly announced this was his most successful season so far. The house had sold and we had slowly started to move into our new house, though we spent most of our time at the cottage to enjoy the lake on our days off.“Why are you making a bagel?” Gabriel asked one morning as he filled his plate with bacon and eggs.“To eat…” I said with a frown.“You don’t eat bagels” he said looking at me curiously, “Is this a pregnancy thing?”“No, I don’t, and no it’s not”“Who are you specially making bagels for?” he asked, annoyed.&ld
I had my follow up ultrasound and blood work done during March and awaited the results impatiently. I knew Gabriel was just as anxious about it as I was but he was better able to mask his anxiety as he kept busy with work.Luckily, the ground began thawing and construction on our new house began. This gave me a brief moment of respite as I focused on the blueprints, choosing paint and flooring. It was an exciting process to watch, one day there was a huge hole in the ground, then there was a foundation and soon walls were being put up.Matteo had come down to help Gabriel get ready for the season. He was staying in Chrissy’s old room while he was with us and went home on the weekend to see his family. Gabriel and Matteo were away most of the day and I took those opportunities to pack up the house and deal with the realtors. Since our new house wasn’t going to be ready until the fall Gabriel had rented a storage unit as I had su