CHAPTER 6

MY HEART HAMMERED painfully in my chest as I sat up, careful not to wake him. 

What have you done, Raven? What have you done? were the only words that rang over and over again in my head. 

The events of the night before played on a loop in my mind—the heat of his touch, the way he made me feel seen, the way I gave him every broken piece of me without a second thought.

It felt unbelievably good, but it's the most reckless decision I've made in my entire life.

And I sure as hell regret this already. 

My hands trembled as I slipped out of bed, quietly gathering my clothes. Every brush of fabric against my skin felt heavier than it should—like the weight of my own shame pressing down on me.

He shifted slightly in his sleep, a soft sigh escaping his lips, and for a moment, I just stood there, watching him. He looked so calm, like he had no troubles in the world. I just wanted to return to his arms. It would be so easy to crawl back into bed, to pretend none of this mattered. But it did.

I had to go.

Slipping out of the cabin, I ran—the early morning cold air biting at my exposed skin, the forest swallowing me whole. Every step was a reminder of how far I’d fallen.

Mother would be so disappointed in me. I stooped way too low.

By the time I reached the pack house, my hair was wind-tangled, my makeup smudged beyond recognition, and the ache in my chest had settled into something numb. I barely had time to catch my breath when the sound of giggles reached my ears.

Elena.

I froze, my stomach churning.

There she was, leaning against Luca, her hands all over him like she was staking her claim. His arm draped lazily around her waist, his head tilted down to kiss her neck—and they knew I was watching.

They wanted me to see.

Don't they have any shame? Isn't he scared that someone will see them? 

"Well, look who decided to crawl back," Elena’s voice rang out, saccharine sweet with malice beneath. "You look… rough, Raven."

Luca’s smirk was cruel. "Late night? Trying to be someone you're not now, huh Raven? Must be hard finding someone willing to deal with all your baggage."

Their laughter cut through me like a knife, but I refused to let them see me bleed. I stood tall, my shoulders squared, my chin lifted. "Better rough and honest than fake and pathetic," I shot back, my voice steady—even though my insides were trembling.

I walked past them without another glance, every step an effort not to collapse under the weight of it all.

The second my bedroom door closed behind me, the mask cracked.

Tears streamed down my face as I sank onto my bed, muffling my sobs into the pillow. It was all too much—the betrayal, the heartbreak, the shame of what I’d done, and the loneliness that clung to me like a second skin.

How had my life come to this?

When the tears finally slowed, I felt hollow—an emptiness I couldn’t fill no matter how tightly I curled into myself.

I remained indoors all day, wondering the next move from here. I couldn't stay down, I couldn't remain like this. 

But what was I supposed to do?

The man I'm in love with cheated on me with my best friend, shows no remorse, and still expects me to go on and marry him.

And I slept with his father.

What was I thinking? How do I get out of this mess? 

I managed to take a cold bath, and washed the last bit of my ruined disguise from my face. However, as soon as I stepped out, my eyes fell on Luca sitted on my bed.

My eyes darkened. “What are you doing here?"

His eyes ran over me, a predatory stare in them. I subconsciously held onto the towel over my body tighter. “What are you doing here?" I repeated, my voice harsher. 

He rose to his full length, and I took a step back. "That's no way to talk to your mate, Raven.” 

My fists clenched. Is he here to rub it in more? “What? Gotten bored with her already?” I retorted.

He smirked casually. "Oh no! Elena is a 10, I can't get bored that easily.” He took a step closer, and I took three back. "But it did make me want more.”

The anger rose in me like an over-agigated volcano. Luca, you asshole! "Get out of here! Have you no shame at all?” I spat at him.

His eyes darkened. "Don't talk to me like that!” He snapped, making me jump out of my skin. "You'll be my mate in a few weeks, that thing you're keeping to yourself, I'm still going to have it. So what is the point? There's no need for you to do selfish, Raven.”

I buried my lips in between my teeth, as the hurt soared through my chest all over again. How dare he?

I wonder what's he's going to say when he realizes that I have lost my virginity. And even worse, to his father! What better way is there to smash one's ego?

But I couldn't say anything, try as I might. First, I was utterly ashamed of what I had done. That's not who I am.

Second, I have come to loathe and fear Luca. We're alone in this room, I have no idea what he'll do to me.

I won't let myself get hurt because of some stupid revenge. 

I needed air. “Luca, can you please leave?" I said. “I need to dress up."

His eyes glowed with mischief. “Let me watch you!"

You douchebag! I wanted to cuss.

“No! Get out of here, or I'm going to scream." I dared to say.

He was standing beside me the next minute, gripping my hand roughly. "Are you threatening me now, huh Raven? You've grown wings, I see.” 

My trembling hands held unto the towel. "Luca, please, let me go. Haven't you done enough? Can't you see that I'm hurting?” I pleaded, my eyes burning with tears.

He looked at me briefly, letting out a frustrated huff as he let me go. "You're no use!” He mumbled, storming out of the room.

Once I was alone again, I held unto myself, trying my best to keep the tears inside. I won't cry anymore. I won't cry anymore! 

They don't deserve my tears. They never deserved my love either. They're jerks, incarnates of the devil, they should fucking be with him for crying out loud, not here making my life miserable.

I needed air.

After dressing up, I finally left the confines of my room. The pack land was quiet and calm, the world painted in soft grays and greens, dew clinging to the grass beneath my bare feet. I walked without thinking, my mind a tangled mess of regret and anger.

I was so lost in my thoughts, I didn’t see him until I collided right into his chest.

Strong hands gripped my arms to steady me, the scent of him flooding my senses—woodsmoke, earth, and something uniquely him.

I looked up, and there he was.

The Alpha.

Recognition flickered in his eyes, and my heart stopped.