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Behind the scenes SHE
“Your father thinks we are married.” I say lightly once we are both in the room, the door firmly locked behind us. The rest of dinner was a blur, I didn’t speak again, even when Richard congratulated me for my marriage and asked too many questions about a ceremony that didn’t happen.“Who proposed? How was the wedding like? When did it happen?”I had no response to any of the questions, instead I had my own questions, thankfully his father had gotten bored with no fighting, he got up and bid us a good night, although I think he means the opposite, I got up as soon as his back was turned to us, despite Richard’s plea to catch up. Abed had followed me silently, like he had been throughout dinner, I didn’t mind that, but here, now, he could not remain silent. “Your brother too. Greta too in fact.” I say recalling how her eyes fell on the ring, and what she said, then I thought she was simply mistaken, but everyone could not be simply mistaken at once. “How can I not know that I am mar
Behind the scenes HE
“You aren’t even married?” My father’s condescending voice when he finds me outside, watching Rachel drive away from me. My heart thumping so loud in my chest everyone should be able to hear it. “No, not that, you are married but the bride has no idea is more like it.” He laughs even louder this time, spilling his cruelty for everyone to hear.I run a frustrated hand through my hair, worry ran through my veins, she sped away in anger, a volatile emotion, she could crash or end up in a ditch somewhere, I have to find her. Turning around and going inside to fetch my phone, my father follows me, pretending I don’t see him, I focus on finding my phone.“You are my son after all, I just didn’t expect you would pull a fast one about this, especially when you were full of talk.” he laughs again.The only thing I can think about is her alone on the road, by this time of the night, in a speeding car and clearly not thinking clearly. Guilt racked my entire body, squeezing my chest so hard that
Behind the scenes HE
His statement ticked a nerve, she was mine... or not, I console myself with the fact that they have known each other for several years now, and finding her was more important than anything at the moment, including the useless jealousy that had been pricking the back of my mind for years now. “How did you two meet?” he asked me while sticking his head out of the window, reminding me of the kid I once knew.“Depends on who you ask.” I mutter to myself as I drive, heading to my house, where Clay had asked to meet via text.“I am asking you.” he says pointedly, pulling his head for a second just to do so.“At a bar, on her birthday.”He nods and hums a response, pulling his head back into the car, I feel his stare on me for a long time before I ask, “What?”“Conversations work when you ask me, how we met as well.” He gestures with his hand around us, as if being stuck in a car with him was enough to forget his crimes.When I don’t respond fast enough, he lets out a sigh and sinks into
Behind the scenes SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER
“Where am I?” My voice comes out as a hoarse whisper, as my head continued to swivel in all directions, looking for something that would at least give me a clue to where I was. I wince as the sudden movement causes my head to bang, and bile to rush to my throat-- and from the scratchy feeling in my throat, I could tell it was not the first time this had happened. The bare, stone walled room was very unfamiliar, as were the plain satin sheets on the king sized bed that threatened to swallow me whole, my bed back home certainly did not require me to go around it before I could climb in.“Where am I?” I ask again, this time a bit louder than a whisper, and I was met with the same echo of my croaky voice, no answer to my question.My head banged and the world tilted, and no matter how I tried, I could not remember what happened few hours prior, but that was not the only reason my mind screamed at me that I was genuinely and absolutely fucked.I find an adjoining door wide open, and scram
Behind the scenes BEFORE SHE REMEMBERED
36 HOURS BEFORE SHE REMEMBERED.Some people say when life is just about to change, they get a tingly feeling, a sensation of foreboding of some kind. Mine came in form of a call I had been anticipating so much I started to chew on my nails again, a bad habit I had since dropped after my debut, my stylist scowled at me until I forced my hand out of my mouth. Gregory, my manager was known as a wizard when picking scripts, he knew what movies to find for me, he would not even bother if he thought in one way or the other the movie was going to flop, and he was always right. Even if I wanted a script so badly, if he says no, I would not do it. “I promised you only the best, and that is exactly what I am going to give you, the absolute best, nothing less.” he would say every time, and I would mouth the words along because I knew what came next. So when the rumors about a film with a strong female lead, saving herself and then the entire world, started to circulate, Gregory jumped on it,
Behind the scenes BEFORE SHE REMEMBERED
The night quickly drew closer, and even if it was not a formal event, my glam team worked on my appearance, when I protested, they inform me that this was what they did, and I only had to do my part later. I smile between them, wondering if this was how it felt to have friends, the swelling feeling in my chest, the rush between in my veins, was this the reason people had friends? I was always good at being another people, being myself was where I had the trouble, that was why acting was everything to me. That was why when I was not acting, I had no idea how to relate with people, how to act without a script, how to exist without direction, what to do without the cameras, that was where I fell short, my own body felt foreign, how do I place my hands without coming off as awkward as I felt? No director told you if your facial muscles were not relaxed enough as you went about making friends. And this was the grand reason I have no single person to call my friend in all my twenty nine ye
Behind the scenes SHE REMEMBERS
“...Sub.” That one word sucked me in a vortex of fast playing memories, my jaw dropping open as I could not believe I had ruined my career, single handedly. Gregory had given me a look that asked what he did not voice out, are you insane? maybe I was, since I still had the alcohol induced confidence and was almost on top of him, he had leaned back all the way and my right hand that supported my weight shook, I almost collapse on him then, but he seizes my hand last minute, helping me back up, and therefore away from him. “Let us get you home, before you do something you regret tomorrow.” he says with a shake of his head, he hooks my arm around his neck when he was up, my legs wobble, I felt his warm hand sneak around my waist, holding me upright. The warmth of his hand around me causes my entire body to tingle, I press my lips together so a moan did not slip out. It has been too long since I felt a man touch me so intimately, and without a script, so I lean into him even more as he
Behind the scenes SHE REMEMBERS 2
“Letting a man do as he pleases with my body... having no control over everything that happens to me, being used as a cock sleeve...” I hug myself even tighter as this doggedly handsome stranger recites my tweets back to me, my teeth grind against the other, annoyance flowing in my veins, why does everyone think they can dictate how my life goes? Was I the only celebrity with a burner account? “No, but you were the only one who made a foolish mistake with both of them.” His deep voice was as calm and collected as he looked. His blue eyes studied me even as he was silent, I shrink further into myself, unsure what to do with the attention. “Why don’t you go wash up, maybe a warm bath would help.” he says this like an order and not a question, and something in me wants to turn around and comply, no questions asked, but I was in a stranger’s house, and no matter how devilishly handsome he was, or how many tingles I get in my belly, just from hearing him speak, I stare at him defiantly.
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