“Where am I?” My voice comes out as a hoarse whisper, as my head continued to swivel in all directions, looking for something that would at least give me a clue to where I was. I wince as the sudden movement causes my head to bang, and bile to rush to my throat-- and from the scratchy feeling in my throat, I could tell it was not the first time this had happened.
The bare, stone walled room was very unfamiliar, as were the plain satin sheets on the king sized bed that threatened to swallow me whole, my bed back home certainly did not require me to go around it before I could climb in.
“Where am I?” I ask again, this time a bit louder than a whisper, and I was met with the same echo of my croaky voice, no answer to my question.
My head banged and the world tilted, and no matter how I tried, I could not remember what happened few hours prior, but that was not the only reason my mind screamed at me that I was genuinely and absolutely fucked.
I find an adjoining door wide open, and scramble from the bed as I struggle to climb out of it and into the open door, I find it is a large and plain white bathroom, I could not complain since the toilet bowl was right there, as the contents of my stomach threatened to spill out, sticking my head in it, I groan and dry heave, I must have done this a few times because my stomach is empty. I groan and pull myself up to a sitting position on the strange toilet floor, groaning, and wishing I didn’t drink so much.
“Again, where the hell am i?” My voice comes out croaky when I ask the question out loud, even to my ears. There was no answer of course, I was alone in the room that was absolutely and certainly not mine, I would know, this room was too minimalist for me, I preferred the exaggerated, over the top, frilly decorations.
Groaning once more, I picked myself up from the floor, noting that I was in a white satin night dress that I did not own, as I would never again, wear something so simple. Then where was I? And who dressed me up?
I wince as a fresh wave of headache hits me, I clutch at my head as my eyes scan this plain environment for a clue on how I got there, or my phone at least, when I don’t find it, i sigh with relief,
“Maybe I am in one of those dreams where phones don’t exist.” I tell myself,and it actually made a lot o sense to my still hung over mind, since it equally explained where this plain stone walls where.
Unless... this was a movie set, I gasped, looking around with fresh set of eyes, the realization jolted me, I never brought my phone on set with me, that was one of the reasons I was named the most professional actress of the year, every year on every magazine that mattered. Although people don’t know this, my phone doesn’t follow me because I have no one calling me, asides my manager, and he handled the rest of my calls.
“Gregory?” I call out, my voice echoes back to me in the stoned space. No response from my manager.
Clenching my head in my open hands, I walk to what I hoped was the door to the outside world. I force my mind to cough up the details I was missing, like the last few hours, or maybe even more.
I remember getting a call from Gregory telling me that I got a role in the film, Because she will, I had been so happy about it, who would not be? It was predicted to be even bigger than the Titanic, and every actress wanted it. Directed by James Holt himself, he personally hand picked the casts, which meant, if you got picked, you were worth your shit, that was better than all the rows of awards hat sat in my award room back at home.
Yet, i had no one to share my good news with, so I drank alone. Was that what happened? I feel like something else was missing, something very important. Finally, I spot my sparkly cased phone half slid under the stone like door, like someone had kicked it by accident, if they were very drunk.
I groan when I reach down to pick it up, my head felt like it was going to roll off my neck, I cuss under my breath, I was never a big drinker, but I was celebrating, I guess that was my excuse for going overboard.
Pulling the giant door open with one hand, and scrolling through my barely a list-- contact list, I find Gregory’s phone number, he was in my favorites and my emergency contact, he did that when I renewed my contract with him, the only time he showed any form of emotion towards me that was more than professional.
I find zero bars when I try to call him, quirking my head to the side, I try again, I have heard from my co actors that most times cell service on sets were bad since we could sometimes be in locations that had no cell phone towers.
“Great.” I mutter, leaving the plain room behind.
In front of me was a long stone hallway, it looked exactly like the room, the stone carvings looked realistic as well, it must have been one expensive set. That bothered me, I wrapped up all my shootings a while ago, giving me time to rest in case I got Because she will, and that was not set in the stone ages.. did I perhaps crash into a set I wasn’t starring in?
One bar dinged on my phone screen, and I quickly dial Gregory, as it rings, my eyes dart everywhere around me, how was there not a single soul on set? it rings to the end with no response.
“Huh?” That was even more worrisome, he had never done that before, my calls were the most important to him, so he always answered, no matter what he was doing or what the time said. Did something happen to him?
I walk deeper into the stone walled hallway, looking for someone to explain to me what was going on, my fingers still worked, dialing his phone number again, and again, and again, all fourteen times I get the same thing, Gregory was not answering my calls, for the first time in thirteen years.
He once let it slip that he took his phone to the bathroom because he wasn’t sure when I was going to call, whatever happened to him must have been terrible. My brows tug with worry, what was going on beyond this stone walls?
I quicken my pace, looking for an exit this time, and I do find one, a double door at the end of the hallway, finally, I huff, getting into a slow jog in the direction of the doors, and when I burst through it, I find myself at a balcony, staring into endless fields of flowers.
“Where the fuck is this place?” I mutter angrily,
“And everyone else believes you do not so much as cuss.” A deep voice says from my right, startling me.
I am even more startled when I see who was there with me, the most gorgeous man I had ever laid my eyes upon, how I managed to miss him earlier was something I would not understand.
I cross my arms over my chest, hoping to hide my perking nipples from his smothering blue eyes.
“And who might you be? And where is this place?” I had other questions but I decide to keep them until after he answered these few.
He cocked his head to the side, a puzzled look on his angular jaw,
“Miss Rachel Greene, are you telling me you don’t remember the events of last night?” I loved the way my name tumbled out of his lips, but I quickly looked down, scanning my body for signs, I would know would I not? If something happened between this handsome stranger and I?
“No.. you know my name.” I muse out loud,
I see him struggle not to roll his blue eyes at me,
“The entire country knows your name, and you can’t tell me you don’t remember signing a contract to be my Sub and live here with me for six months.”
36 HOURS BEFORE SHE REMEMBERED.Some people say when life is just about to change, they get a tingly feeling, a sensation of foreboding of some kind. Mine came in form of a call I had been anticipating so much I started to chew on my nails again, a bad habit I had since dropped after my debut, my stylist scowled at me until I forced my hand out of my mouth. Gregory, my manager was known as a wizard when picking scripts, he knew what movies to find for me, he would not even bother if he thought in one way or the other the movie was going to flop, and he was always right. Even if I wanted a script so badly, if he says no, I would not do it. “I promised you only the best, and that is exactly what I am going to give you, the absolute best, nothing less.” he would say every time, and I would mouth the words along because I knew what came next. So when the rumors about a film with a strong female lead, saving herself and then the entire world, started to circulate, Gregory jumped on it,
The night quickly drew closer, and even if it was not a formal event, my glam team worked on my appearance, when I protested, they inform me that this was what they did, and I only had to do my part later. I smile between them, wondering if this was how it felt to have friends, the swelling feeling in my chest, the rush between in my veins, was this the reason people had friends? I was always good at being another people, being myself was where I had the trouble, that was why acting was everything to me. That was why when I was not acting, I had no idea how to relate with people, how to act without a script, how to exist without direction, what to do without the cameras, that was where I fell short, my own body felt foreign, how do I place my hands without coming off as awkward as I felt? No director told you if your facial muscles were not relaxed enough as you went about making friends. And this was the grand reason I have no single person to call my friend in all my twenty nine ye
“...Sub.” That one word sucked me in a vortex of fast playing memories, my jaw dropping open as I could not believe I had ruined my career, single handedly. Gregory had given me a look that asked what he did not voice out, are you insane? maybe I was, since I still had the alcohol induced confidence and was almost on top of him, he had leaned back all the way and my right hand that supported my weight shook, I almost collapse on him then, but he seizes my hand last minute, helping me back up, and therefore away from him. “Let us get you home, before you do something you regret tomorrow.” he says with a shake of his head, he hooks my arm around his neck when he was up, my legs wobble, I felt his warm hand sneak around my waist, holding me upright. The warmth of his hand around me causes my entire body to tingle, I press my lips together so a moan did not slip out. It has been too long since I felt a man touch me so intimately, and without a script, so I lean into him even more as he
“Letting a man do as he pleases with my body... having no control over everything that happens to me, being used as a cock sleeve...” I hug myself even tighter as this doggedly handsome stranger recites my tweets back to me, my teeth grind against the other, annoyance flowing in my veins, why does everyone think they can dictate how my life goes? Was I the only celebrity with a burner account? “No, but you were the only one who made a foolish mistake with both of them.” His deep voice was as calm and collected as he looked. His blue eyes studied me even as he was silent, I shrink further into myself, unsure what to do with the attention. “Why don’t you go wash up, maybe a warm bath would help.” he says this like an order and not a question, and something in me wants to turn around and comply, no questions asked, but I was in a stranger’s house, and no matter how devilishly handsome he was, or how many tingles I get in my belly, just from hearing him speak, I stare at him defiantly.
In response to what he said, my body hummed, coming to life in a way that I had never experienced, my nipples were little rigid nubs, and I wanted his hand all over my body. But I also remember people online telling me I was turning an entire race of people into one of my fetishes, and many people agreed. I honestly did not see it as that, but the people had made up their minds. “I was drunk when I agreed to a contract with you, I am sorry for all inconveniences caused during my stay here, I will compensate you for everything if you tell me the costs, but I really have to go now.” I say with a rush to get the words out, my head still banged, most of memories from last night was yet to come back to me, I needed to go back home where things still made sense, away from this beautiful man who made me want to do the very things I tweeted about. And it made no sense since I did not even know the man. He studied me in silence, and I study his forehead, I can’t look him in the eye, especia
“What is her name?”His brows meet in the middle as he tried to decode my question, his head even tilts a little to the side in thought, and I found it cute, he had a little pout whenever he was confused, is it bad that I never want him to find out anything? “What?”I gesture to the cat still eating from the bowl, she hasn’t even come up to gasp for air ever since.“You haven’t introduced me to your cat.”The cute pout disappears and I try to hide my disappointment, I should have let him be confused for as long as possible. He has a little smirk on his face, he knows I am trying to change the subject, and he was going to play along, for now.“Crest is not my cat, she wanders here whenever she wants and leaves right after she has gotten what she wants.” he says this with a little shake of his head, like he was disappointed that she only came to him for food. I frown, the name Crest was unusual, and it sounded familiar, and I was sure it was important to me, my eyes wander up to fin
ABED'S POV“If you would excuse me, I have something very important I would like to discuss with Clay, and if they leave like that, Joanne would make it hard for me to see him.” I tell her, my jaw tightening at the mention of Joanne’s name. Rachel blinked her huge brown eyes at me, my knees instantly grows weak, I have imagined those eyes looking up at me so many times, and in my imagination, she was begging me to use her, just like all of her posts did. She looked away quickly, her eyes darting everywhere that was not my face, but I wanted them to look at me again, pleading silently for her eyes to fall on me, instead, a tiny bit of her pink tongue darts out and wets her lips before disappearing into her mouth again. I felt myself grow even harder, I knew from watching her that this was how her nervousness showed. But her small mouth looks so pretty doing that, I wanted to fuck it so bad. Gripping the back of the chair, I shut my eyes for a second, rem
The thoughts that plagued me as soon as his footsteps disappeared down the hall was appalling. I immediately started to see them together in my mind’s eye, the way she held him earlier meant it was a regular occurrence for them, and I was not entirely sure how Clay and Joanne were related, but she definitely liked Abed, or at least that was the feeling I was getting from her. They obviously have known each other longer than I can imagine, so I had no right to be possessive or whatever feeling this was, after all, I was definitely not going to stay here long, I just had to thank him and return to my normal life. Crest the cat meowed, her plate was empty, but she doesn’t wait for me or anyone to refill her plate, she struts out of the room. “You have the better idea between the two of us, I could just dine and run, staying here and waiting until he returns will only make it difficult for me to leave. He was obviously too dangerous to hang around.” I say following the cat, wherever sh
We ended up fucking all night, I had only read that in books, I had no idea that it could happen in real life, and that it would happen to me. Abed wasn’t tired, neither was I, every time we came it seemed like we craved the other even more. Our bodies sleeked in sweat and mixed with our fluids, we continued to explore each other’s bodies. Naked and tangled in his arms, under the sheets, I realize this was the life I wanted for myself, sleeping next to the man I love, perfectly content. His hands tighten around my waist, I chuckle quietly, he was so adorable. “What are you laughing at?” he says in the most sexy morning voice I had ever heard. It left me shivering. I look at his face and he had a brow raised in question.“Again?”I felt my face redden, and I bury it in the crook of his neck, “I always want you.” I murmur, taking in his scent, it was a mix of various scents, and it was good that I bury my nose there. He picks up my hand, guides it downwards, in between his nak
My new routine was easy, I had breakfast at Big daddy’s, visit some place I had never been, even if I grew up here, I was like a tourist, eager and excited for whatever the new day had to offer in a city as big as this. I had lunch wherever the locals said was good, and it was good, a few people recognized me, and I saw my pictures on the internet at the end of the day, I trained myself to never look at the comments, I was trying to live for me after all. And for dinner, I heated up a portion of Abed’s meals, and that was the highlight of my day, no matter what scenery I had seen earlier, nothing compared to when I sat down alone with the meal he had prepared for me. An ache wrapped around my heart, I was missing him terribly, but I didn’t want to resent him, so I needed the time to heal properly. Joanne often times came over, and tonight, I was also expecting her, I had set out wine I hand picked at the winery I visited earlier today, and two glasses, I had already eaten and sho
My entire body stiffened when her hand grabbed at the elbow of my shirt, I pause in my steps, fighting the urge to turn around and beg to be in her life, knowing fully well I didn’t deserve it. “Can you wait for me? Until I am ready.” she whispers, I could feel all her emotions from just a few words, the hurt, the desperation, the love.Of course I would wait, I waited years to see her, years to tell her I loved her, years to hold her in my arms, waiting would be too much mercy for me. Turning slowly, I find her tear streaked face staring at her feet, her sniffles wracking her entire body. Guilt pushed through my body, with my thumb hooked under her face, gently, I make her face me, her lips quivered as she stared at me. “I will wait, take whatever time you need, I will be waiting.” I tell her honestly as I wiped the tears from her face. She smiles, her eyes brightening and my lungs expelled all the air it had been holding. “No matter how long?”“It doesn’t matter to me, I will b
We end up staying awake most of the night, clinging to each other, talking and laughing about the most useless of things, the world beyond the locked doors of the short let, along with all of our issues could wait, we would face them in the morning, tonight, we were going to pretend we were okay. “I don’t think I can fight the sleep any longer.” I stifle a third yawn in the last two minutes. I would beat up myself for falling asleep now, but my eyelids were heavy, my bones weary from all our activities from earlier. “It’s okay, go to sleep my love.”Even in my sleepy haze I hear him, and it makes me feel good, the words I didn’t realize would mean so much to me, the words I wasn’t sure I would hear again. “Good night my love, I love you.”I feel his lips pressed against my forehead just as I drifted off to sleep, and in my dreams this time, I am at a crossroad, literally. Without opening my eyes, my hands reach out on the bed, expecting to hit the warmth of his body, but the space
We stay like that for a while, him collapsed beside me, breathing hard, my heart worked fast, thumping and slamming furiously, did he say..? did I hear him right? Was I perhaps imagining things? I reach out as subtly as I could, pinching myself, it hurt, I was neither dreaming or imagining things, this was real. The silence pressed around us, it was obvious both of us heard the words, but what if I was the one who uttered them? Shit, shit, shit, I shut my eyes, wondering how I was going to undo it. I had confessed my feelings when I was supposed to see him out, that was how one night stands worked right? “Rachel... I didn’t say it so you could say it back to me.”His voice and words startle me, so he said it then, I had managed to keep my dignity, that was good... wait, he said he loved me? I turn to face him sharply, he was staring at me, his eyes so intense that I have to swallow. “You said that?” My voice comes out as a shocked whisper, he raised a brow in question, then he chuc
Flustered was an understatement of how I was feeling, my legs shook, my nerves jumped in excitement. I was still riding waves of the orgasms that washed over me and the ones that were promised. I realize only now that he stopped because of the constant knocking on the bathroom door, the voices on the other end say something about getting the spare key. Abed’s fingers work expertly as he arranges my skirt back and top back in place, he gives me the smile I have come to realize was reserved for just me as he kissed my forehead and pushed me into a bathroom stall. “Stay here until you hear me leave.” he whispers, his mouth dangerously close to mine, I can only nod, I was afraid I would moan if I tried to speak. Within a minute the door was unlocked and I hear the others speaking to him, but his only response is the sound of his footfall as he walked away. I wait until it is silent before walking out of the stall. My body still buzzing with unspent energy, I needed him like crazy. “Th
With our mouths still locked, our feet moved, one hand around my waist, the other at the back of my head. My body roared to life, pulsing with different kinds of emotions as we kissed. Oh how much I missed this, how much I missed him. My back pressed against a door, and his hand slipped from my waist to lock the door behind us, returning to my waist, his hand slips underneath the short skirt, I shiver against him as his familiar hands squeezed and molded my ass. “Ohhh...” I murmur into his mouth, he groaned slightly in response, his hand tugging my hair backward, his tongue sweeps into my mouth, even with my eyes closed I felt it roll backwards. My hands roam the expanse of his hard back, the familiar ridges under my finger tips, even under his clothes I could feel them, the dip in and out, I longed to feel it directly under my finger tips. My eyes flew open when I felt myself being lifted, my ass hitting the cool sink of the bathroom, I meet his eyes, both of us out of breath,
The lone flower followed me all the way to the clothes store, and I got new clothes for the art museum, I had shot a quick text to Connor, asking him if he was free to meet today, his reply could not have been quicker, he said yes, asked for the time and where he should pick me up from. Smiling to myself as I picked out my clothes, I hoped he was watching, so I put on a performance of a life time, humming and giggling to myself when I look at my phone, like a girl would if she was texting someone she was interested in. By them time I returned home, I had two lone... well, not alone anymore, sunflowers, I tuck them into the vase, locking the doors behind me. I still had time to kill before the time I had agreed to meet him, so I dive into the book I had been reading the other day, and even with the thought that I was alone and there was nobody to peek over my shoulder and see what dirty things I was reading, my cheeks flamed. Those kinds of things that were explicitly described in th
Clutching the flowers tightly, I followed the path the child had shown me, my head swiveling in all directions for a glimpse of him, my feet slamming on the ground as I chased his scent, there was no sight of his car, and definitely no sight of him, the only things I was left with were the sunflowers and his scent that was fast fading. That was yesterday, but I haven’t stopped looking, I had put the flowers in water and placed the vase I had found by the window for the plant to get sunlight, not so that he miraculously turned up here and knew where I was staying by the flowers he had given to me. Going for a quick run to clear my head this morning, I asked myself the big questions, did I miss him? I did, but it doesn’t make what he did hurt any less. My parents I thought would come running when they saw me on the big screen, they never did, even with the news of me being orphan going around like wild fire, they never showed, and to be very honest, I waited with baited breath just as